Kade Loves Alex

by Holder, Krystal

  I hear myself grumble. Out loud. Like a frickin’ dog. Kayla looks at me knowingly and pats my back as I pretend like I am coughing.

  “Can you walk me to class?” Evelyn asks throwing an evil glance at me.

  “Yeah, sure.” Kade turns to me and kisses me on my cheek. “See you at lunch, Lex” he says softly before walking with Evelyn to her class. Thank God that today is Friday. My emotions are all over the place.

  “So you and Nathan are officially over?” Kayla asks as we sit down for lunch at our usual table on campus under a huge tree.

  “Yes,” I reply. “It is more than just what happened yesterday, Kay. I am exhausted. He constantly brings up Kade… Like last week he came over and we were hanging out in my room, and he notices that pictures of Kade and I are all over my walls. So he goes “What’s all this about? I don’t see any pictures of me in your room and we’ve been dating for months.” I tried to brush it off with a laugh but he kept on saying mean things about Kade. And I lost it. I started yelling. He started yelling. It all went downhill from there.” I sigh.

  Kayla looks at me and shakes her head. “I do not know what you expect, Alex. You and Kade practically ooze sexual tension. You are always hugging and kissing each other. These guys are intimidated by him … he is also quite large compared to the lot of them.”

  I avoid her gaze.

  “We do not have sexual tension.”

  “Uh-huh, continue lying to yourself, Alexandria. You need to wake up and smell the … Kade.” She laughs at her own lame joke. I smile too, remembering that I did in fact wake up smelling my Kade.

  I shrug. “Kade and I are best friends. He has been with me my entire life and has always been there for me. I will never choose anyone over him. What do these guys expect me to do? You know that I have had a few boyfriends, they all get mad when they see how close Kade and I are. They expect me to change my feelings towards him. But I never will. And I have been right not to! We always break up, and do you know who is always there after they leave? Kade. He is like my brother.” I conclude.

  “Yeah,” she scuffs “A brother you would like to screw.”

  I gasp. “What?! Never!”

  “I saw you this morning, Alexandria Hayes. Your eyes were emerald with envy!” she teases.

  I feel myself blush.

  “When are you going to realize that you are in love with him? He is perfect for you in every way. I don’t understand what you are so afraid of…” she trails off. I hear loud laughter close by and I turn to see Kade talking to a group of three pretty girls. They are giggling and one of them is playing with his shirt collar. He turns to me and his onyx eyes catches mine. He jogs over and lopes his arms over my shoulders.

  “Why do you look so serious?” he asks stealing a French fry from my plate.

  “Just tired and ready for the weekend.” I reply trying to avoid his gaze.

  “Mmmhmm,” he responds. He always knows when I am lying. Before I know it, all my fries and half my burger have disappeared from my plate, thanks to Kade and his never ending stomach. I notice him reaching for the left over brownie that my mom made for me last night, and I shove his big hand away.

  “No! You already ate more than half of my lunch!” I complain, hiding the brownie behind my back.

  “Fine,” he huffs, looking away sadly. I give in and break the brownie in half. He smiles at me taking his half and eating it in one big bite.

  “Kade!” I hear one of the girls shouting beckoning for him to rejoin their group.

  I roll my eyes in annoyance hearing them giggle and waving him over.

  “Okay, well I’ll see you tonight. Eight-ish at my place.” He gets up and gives me a soft kiss on my forehead and returns to the group of giggling girls.

  I feel Kayla staring at me and I eat my brownie slowly avoiding her stare.

  Oh. My. God. Could it be possible? Could I have feelings for Kade?

  Chapter 3

  Kade

  I remember exactly when I began falling in love with Alexandria. She was about eight and I had just turned nine. That summer, we were learning to roller skate on the sidewalk outside her house and she was much better at it than I was. I remember I kept falling. Hard. And the kids on her block would laugh and tease me relentlessly. She was tinier than most of us – even back then. I remember running into her house, embarrassed as they taunted me. When I peeped through the window, I saw her yelling angrily at the kids. They actually looked afraid of her and they didn’t mess with us for the rest of the summer. She helped me practice for weeks afterwards until I was just as good as she was. My Alex. She always had my back.

  “I’m here!” I hear her singing breaking me out of my reverie. She unlocks the door with the key that I gave her and makes her way into my house. “And I brought the best movie in the world!” she exclaims.

  She is wearing a long blue skirt that falls all the way down to her ankles and a tight white tank top. Even though she is quite small, she has the most amazing curves I have ever seen. She throws off her sandals and makes herself comfortable on my couch.

  “Oh God,” I mumble grabbing the DVD from her hands. “Oh God.” I repeat, seeing the words ‘The Notebook’ sprawled across the cover.

  She grabs the DVD from by hand. “Don’t ‘Oh God’ me. I watched two movies with nonstop guns and car crashes last weekend. It’s my turn.”

  She shoves the DVD into the player and puts her feet under her legs leaning sweetly on my shoulders. I realize that I really don’t mind watching this movie. I get to hold her for two hours.

  Within an hour she is crying. I laugh at her.

  “He loves her so much,” she sniffles. I laugh harder.

  “Why can’t love like this happen in real life?” she questions.

  “It can happen…” I reply quietly.

  “Well it sure hasn’t happened to me… I wish that I could find a guy like that…” she points at the screen.

  “Like what?” I question.

  “A guy that will make me feel like I’m the only girl who could ever have his heart.” She stares at me. “Is that so hard to find?”

  “No, it’s not hard to find Alex. Maybe you’re just looking in all the wrong places.” I stare at her. This is the perfect time to tell her… I’m going to tell her … in five minutes, maybe ten. I suck.

  We go back to watching the last few minutes of the movie and I zone out knowing that Alex will cry for fifteen minutes after the old people die.

  After drying her eyes she asks, “What are you doing tomorrow?”

  “I’m going to the beach party.” I reply, playing with her hair.

  “With who?” she questions.

  “Evelyn…”

  Her eyebrows furrow. “Why do you like her? She is so… so….”

  Not you.

  “So … what?” I chuckle. “You never like any of the girls who are interested in me.”

  “Ha! I could say the same thing about you …” she laughs.

  “That’s because you date prissy douche bags.” I defend myself. Even though I know that I don’t like them because they are not good enough for her. No one is.

  “You haven’t had a steady girlfriend in a long time.” She says quietly, twisting her long golden brown hair with her hands over her left shoulder. She always does this when she is nervous. “How come?” She asks.

  Because I am waiting for you.

  “Because,” I say instead, “I haven’t found the right girl yet.” I can feel the tension between us, something that is barely ever present in our relationship so I say, “And besides, I like playing the field. I never get bored.”

  She elbows me in my side, probably hurting her arms more than hurting me. “You are such a player.” She retorts.

  I sigh, pulling her into my arms and holding her tight. I wasn’t a player. The girls that I dated served one sole purpose – a distraction from my feelings for Alex.

  “I love you.” I hear myself say. Shocked at myself, I try not to bre
athe. She stiffens in my arms until I hear her giggle.

  “I love you too … you’re the best friend a girl could ever wish for.” She cuddles more against my side and kisses me softly on my cheek. I hold her tight and wish that I had the balls to tell her how I feel.

  Chapter 4

  Alex

  I give myself a quick survey in the mirror before heading out to the beach party. Tonight I chose a short, tight black dress with long sleeves, and red sandals. I sigh loudly as I tie my hair into a high bun and my thoughts travel to last night, when Kade and I were watching movies. Kade told me that he loved me and my heart had literally stopped for a few seconds. At that moment the possibility that he could love me as more than friends was more appealing that I would have liked to admit. Last night I almost jumped into his arms, until I realized that we always tell each other that we love each other … as friends. I blush thinking about it.

  He had walked me to my car. It was getting late and he had plans with his family the following morning.

  “Are you sure you’re ok – I know that you and Nathan were getting pretty close…” he drifted off, leaning against my little yellow Volkswagen.

  “I’m okay, Kade really… Nathan is an amazing person, but something was always missing from the relationship.” I sighed. “Maybe something is wrong with me.”

  He huffed at that. “Nothing is wrong with you…” he pulled me in front of him in between his legs and wrapped his big arms around my waist. I imagined that we would look like a couple to passersby. That thought made me smile and I sniffed at his green shirt. He always smelled nice – like cinnamon.

  “You’re always sniffing me,” he said into my hair.

  “Because you always smell so nice,” I replied grinning up at him. I sank into his warmth and my mind drifted back to Nathan.

  “And on top of that,” I said into his shirt deciding to be honest. “You know that he was just too jealous of our relationship.”

  He looked down at me and when he didn’t say anything I continued.

  “He didn’t like or understand how we could be so close. This whole month he has been badgering me…” I trailed off.

  “What did he say?” Kade questioned.

  “He wanted to know if we had ever messed around… If we ever kissed.” I gulped staring up at his lips.

  He chuckled. “We are very touchy – feely best friends.”

  I laughed, “I can’t help it. I’m affectionate.” I placed my arms around his waist and squeezed him hard.

  I saw a car pull into his mom’s driveway and I see Jacob, Kade’s younger brother walking towards us. He is almost a clone of Kade – just slightly smaller. I tried to pull away from Kade to say hi to Jacob but Kade held me steadily in place around my waist.

  “What’s up, Lex?” Jacob said sweetly, completely ignoring Kade. I smiled at him, my head still lying against Kade’s chest. He was always trying to flirt with me, trying to get Kade upset.

  “Nothing much,” I replied smiling.

  “You wanna go for a ride with me?” he questioned moving his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

  “Leave,” I heard Kade say.

  “But - ” Jacob gasped.

  “Leave now,” Kade repeated sounding bored. I laughed finding their perpetual banter amusing.

  “Fine!” he sounded playfully offended and turned back around walking slowly towards his house, “When you’re tired of wasting time with Mr. Brooding and Mysterious over there, you know where to find me, Lex. Asshole!” he muttered under his breath but I knew that he said it loud enough for us to hear it. I laughed loudly, and soon Kade was chuckling softly as well.

  Kade lifted my chin with his forefinger and stared into my eyes. “It might always be hard for the people that we date. But no girl will ever tell me that I can’t be with you.”

  He kissed me on my forehead, looked like he wanted to say something else, but instead said.

  “Okay, sleepy head. Head on home. Let me know that you get home safe.” He opened my car door and watched as I buckled myself in.

  “I live five minutes away, Kade. Jesus! Stop treating me like I’m ten.” I complained.

  “Text me when you get home.” He asserted.

  “Okay,” I am secretly flattered by his ever present concern for my well-being. “Bye”.

  When I got back home I stayed up all night, thinking of him. Having him as a best friend has always made my life feel complete. I always felt safe and protected having him near. He knew that I was strong most of the time, but in moments of weakness he always had my back. Before I met Nathaniel I had dated a guy – Justin – who was a bit of an asshole. I found out that he had cheated on me and I was devastated.

  After crying for a few hours on Kade’s shoulders, Kade played with my hair until I was drifting off to sleep. I heard him murmur that he had to go and that he would call me in the morning.

  I found out the next day from Kayla that Kade had beaten the crap out of Justin that very night. After that most guys had stayed away from me. I realized that it was because they were scared shitless of Kade. I didn’t mind being single. I didn’t feel that anything was missing from my life. I never felt alone.

  If I was having a shitty day all I needed was to see Kade loping down the halls towards me, and it would all feel better. I knew that it was bad comparing every guy I ever dated to him. Maybe that was why they only lasted a few months. Because they could never compare to him, they were never tall enough. Never funny enough … never sexy enough.

  Was there a possibility that I could love Kade - be with him as more than just a friend? The more that I thought about it, the more I felt myself smiling.

  I convinced myself around 3:00 am that I would talk to him tonight at the beach party. I would get him in a corner, and I would tell him exactly how I have been feeling. I cannot spend another late night obsessing over this.

  I look into the mirror, giving myself a mental pep talk when I hear my phone buzzing beside me alerting me of a new text message.

  Kade: Whatchyadoing?

  Me: Hey, getting ready for the beach party… you?

  Kade: Me too… leaving in fifteen minutes. I’ll see you soon, love.

  Me: Ok. Kayla is picking me up in twenty. See you soon.

  I hear Kayla’s horn blowing and I walk towards her large, purple truck. My mood immediately brightens as I step inside. Laura is sitting up front and a fun song is playing loudly from the stereo. We sing along to random songs all the way to the party.

  Soon we are at the beach. Kayla, Laura and I walk through the party. The sun is setting and there is a crimson glow over everyone. Some people are dancing and some already paired off and cuddling in shadows.

  I see Nathan and I try to ignore him. He catches my eyes however and walks slowly – cautiously – towards me.

  “Hey, Lex.” He says conversationally.

  “Hi,” I reply coldly, looking over his shoulders hoping that he will take the hint and leave me alone.

  “You look great…” I could almost see the regret in his eyes, and I turn away from him.

  “Anyway,” He continues. “I hope you have a great night.” He leans over me and kisses me on my forehead.

  “You too,” I say to his retreating back. But I don’t think that he hears me.

  I stare after him remembering the first day that we met. He had transferred to Stone Brook six months ago. As soon as I stepped into school that sunny Monday morning I heard the whispers. New Guy. So Sexy.

  I stopped at Kayla’s locker and before I was even within hearing distance she was chattering.

  “Oh My God, have you seen him? Alex, you are going to die!! He is gorgeous! They say that he transferred from …. Oh my god there he is!!”

  I looked over my shoulder and I saw a very handsome guy walking down the halls. He was tall with dark brown hair. I gasped, and somewhere off in the distance I swear that I could hear angels singing. He wore a clean cut black polo shirt and dark jeans. I also notic
ed that his right arm was in a cast and I immediately began fantasizing about the bad guy that he had been in a fight with while defending some poor damsel in distress. He walked past us and Kayla and I unashamedly stared after him as did half the girls in the student body.

  “Holy Hell,” I heard myself mutter. “I want that one.”

  “Don’t we all?” sighed Kayla.

  That morning as I sat in my Spanish Class, Nathan walked in. Ms. Johnson introduced him to the class. His name was Nathaniel White. He was 17. He shifted uncomfortably under the gaze of the thirty or so students. I smiled to myself as the girls in the class automatically leaned forward and the guys backwards. There was an empty seat behind me and Ms. Johnson assigned him to that seat.

  He sauntered pass my chair. My heart skipped a tiny beat when our eyes clashed. I tried to smile at him, but I’m sure it looked more like a grimace. He sat quietly behind me. The class continued and five minutes before the class ended I felt a tap on my shoulder.

  Oh God.

  I turned around slowly, afraid to even breathe.

  “Hi, I’m Nathan.” He whispered.

  “Hi,” I smiled at him.

  “Um,” he cleared his throat. “Do you have an extra pen?” I looked down on his desk and saw two pens sticking out of his notebook and smiled. He was making up an excuse to talk to me.

  “Yes,” I replied immediately even though I only had one pink pen. I handed it to him without even thinking as the buzzer sounded. Lunch Time.

  We stood up. And I noticed that he towered over me, even though I was wearing three inch wedges.

  “I’m Alex,” I offered him my hand and he took it. We continued staring at each other in a comfortable silence. He continued holding my hand. And I could not think of one good reason to pull it away.

  “How did you break your arm?” I asked him in an attempt to break the silence.

  “I fell.” He smirked. “I wish that I had a more dramatic reason.”

  I examined the cast. “You should. I’ll help you make one up. No one signed it yet…”

  He chuckled. “Do you want to sign it?” he handed me a black marker from his bag.