Full Figured 5

by Brenda Hampton

  Full Figured 5:

  Carl Weber Presents

  Brenda Hampton

  and Rose Jackson-Beavers

  www.urbanbooks.net

  All copyrighted material within is Attributor Protected.

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  WHO YA WIT’ 3

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  CHOCOLATE TEMPTATION

  Chapter 1 - Drained of My Energy

  Chapter 2 - Breaking My Heart

  Chapter 3 - The Green-Eyed Monster Reappears

  Chapter 4 - The Eyes Are the Windows to Your Soul

  Chapter 5 - The Bitch in Me

  Chapter 6 - A Cry for Help

  Chapter 7 - Cold Vibes in the Fall Air

  Chapter 8 - If Loving You Is Wrong, I Don’t Want to Be Right

  Chapter 9 - Party Like It’s 1999

  Chapter 10 - Daydreaming and I’m Thinking of You

  Chapter 11 - Another Day’s Journey

  Chapter 12 - The Commitment is Sacred

  Chapter 13 - Two Friends, Two Views

  Chapter 14 - Decisions Are for the Weak at Heart

  Chapter 15 - All Hell Breaks Loose

  Chapter 16 - My Best Friends and Chicken Wings

  Chapter 17 - Getting Away

  Chapter 18 - This Shit Is Unbelievable

  Chapter 19 - It’s So Hard to Say Good-bye

  Chapter 20 - How Do You Mend a Broken Heart?

  Chapter 21 - Strangers in the Midst

  Chapter 22 - So Alone

  Chapter 23 - A Change is Coming!

  Chapter 24 - Changing for the Better

  Chapter 25 - Don’t Want To Go, But Have To

  Chapter 26 - Face to Face with My Past

  Copyright Page

  WHO YA WIT’ 3

  by

  Brenda Hampton

  Chapter 1

  I wasn’t sure if I would ever get this thing called love right. Ever since I could remember, my relationships had been complicated. Divorcing Reggie was just the beginning, and even though we were high school sweethearts, once I found out he had cheated on me, he had to go. I started dating a few other men from time to time, but it was a complete waste because none of them tickled my fancy long enough for me to keep them. Then, I met Roc. Roc was nearly half my age. He was the only man who had brought out that fire in me. He made me smile and laugh again. He made me feel as if I could breathe again, but the drama that came along with him was unacceptable.

  Roc could be classified as a thug to many, and being in the drug game for so many years really disturbed me. He’d done some jail time, all in the name of protecting his uncle Ronnie. Roc loved Ronnie with every fiber of his being, but only a few months ago some decisions had to be made after Ronnie had threatened to kill me and my daughter, Chassidy.

  According to Roc, he made the decision to have Ronnie removed from this earth. I was stunned yet grateful at the same time, because I knew it was either Ronnie or me who would wind up dead. The sad thing was that Roc continued to make decisions to walk away and leave me high and dry. A few years ago, he went to jail by choice and took the blame for someone else. When he got out, he promised me he would never leave me and Chassidy, but after Ronnie was killed, Roc walked away from us again. He told me he was moving on and would never look back. That meant our relationship was history, until he showed up at my son Latrel’s wedding. I was shocked. Roc professed his love for me that day, trying to represent Black Love. He claimed he was ready to be all that I needed him to be. I didn’t believe him for one minute and I had no choice but to let him go.

  That day, however, was something I couldn’t erase from my mind. I kept seeing him standing in the rain in his dripping wet suit that melted on his muscles. His eyes stared into mine, as my friend Monica, who was driving the car, drove away. My heart was calling out to him, even though I didn’t want it to. Days after, I kept asking myself if I had made a mistake by letting him go. Was there something with this relationship that I was missing, or missing out on? I couldn’t stop thinking about Roc, but since he hadn’t reached out to me, that made things easy.

  I had to face the facts that our relationship had been very unstable. The drama with his baby mama, Vanessa, was too much. I was so sure she continued to play a big part in his life. At forty-three years old, I needed something solid. I needed someone I could depend on and Chassidy needed a father she could look up to, one who would be there for her. At this point, I wasn’t convinced that Roc was the one.

  Still, I missed him. A flash of his pearly whites when he smiled kept appearing before me. His dimples were put on display right before my eyes and I kept reaching out to touch his midnight muscular frame that made me attracted to him even more. His frame, however, wasn’t there for me to touch, nor were his hooded, sexy eyes that showed much seriousness at times. I wanted to look into them, again, just to say those words he was probably dying to hear from me. Those words were that I’d made a mistake by letting him go. I wanted to know if we could reconcile our differences and start seeing each other again.

  During my dream last night, I’d said those words to Roc and he was more than delighted to reconcile. He squeezed me in his arms and planted soft kisses on my lips. Right before we were about to indulge ourselves in hot and heavy sex, my alarm clock went off. I had to get up for work, so I rushed out of bed to take a cold shower.

  Once I was dressed, I hurried to get Chassidy ready so I could drop her off at preschool. Every single morning she asked about Roc, and about seeing her little brother, Lil Roc, whom she’d gotten so close to. Removing them from our lives didn’t seem like the sensible thing to do. Chassidy made it clear that she wanted to see her daddy, as well as her brother.

  “When?” she asked as I pulled the purple shirt with Tinker Bell on it over her head. “When is he coming home, Mommy? You said it would be soon, but I haven’t seen him in a long time.”

  I was too ashamed to tell Chassidy that Roc and I couldn’t get our mess together. I told her he’d been on a long vacation, and once he got back, he and Lil Roc would come see us. It didn’t seem as though that was going to happen anytime soon, and I didn’t want to break Chassidy’s heart.

  “His phone number changed, sweetheart, and I’ve been unable to reach him. I’ll do some searching. If I get his phone number, I’ll tell him how much you miss him, okay?”

  Chassidy displayed a wide grin while stepping into her jeans. She looked so much like Roc, chocolate with pretty round eyes and wavy hair. I figured Roc was probably upset with me, but I wondered if he’d even thought about his daughter. I had to be sure that bringing him back into our lives was a good thing to do, because it was evident that all the back and forth between us was starting to affect Chassidy.

  Almost an hour later, I dropped Chassidy off at preschool and headed to work. While waiting in my car at a red light, I tapped my fingers on the steering wheel, contemplating my next move. I had called Roc’s number several times, but his phone was disconnected. I’d even gone to his place, just to see if he had moved to Kansas City as he had said. I wasn’t sure if Kansas City was his destination, but one thing was for sure . . . his place was empty. It was obvious that after what he’d done to Ronnie, Roc didn’t want anyone, including me, to know where he was. Something inside told me to let go; then there was something encouraging me to pursue what I was feeling in my heart. In my heart I was still in love with the father of my child, and with the young man who made my life feel complete. We’d had our ups and downs, but there was no doubt in my
mind that we still had love for each other.

  Like always, work was hectic. I kept busy, and since Mr. Anderson knew my vacation started tomorrow he couldn’t stop bugging me.

  “Desa Rae!” he yelled from his office. My cubicle sat right outside his office, but yelling for me seemed very inappropriate. It was something I’d gotten used to, though, so I didn’t trip. I rushed into his office, wearing a popping peach sheer blouse with ruffles around the collar and a fitted cream-colored skirt that cut above my knees. My outfit was accessorized with gold bangles at my wrist and a thick shimmering gold belt that I’d gotten at Ashley Stewart. I was proud of my curves. Mr. Anderson shifted his eyes from my 40 double-Ds to my face, and all he could do was smile.

  “I apologize for yelling, but my intercom is broken,” he said, reaching out to hand me several papers. “Would you mind making copies of these reports for me?”

  I took the papers from his hand. “Will do. And can I get you anything else while I’m away from my desk?”

  His eyes shifted again, this time at my breasts. I wasn’t sure if Mr. Anderson was intentionally flirting with me, or if he just couldn’t help himself. I guess any man in his right mind would look at a beautiful woman, but as long as he didn’t touch, or say anything inappropriate to me, I was cool.

  “A Pepsi,” he said, turning his attention to my eyes again. “Bring me a Pepsi with a cup of ice.”

  I nodded, and as I turned to walk away, I could feel Mr. Anderson’s lustful eyes all over me. He was an older black man who cheated on his wife and simply did not give a damn. He was sloppy with his mess, too, with his out-of-control mistresses calling the office and showing up whenever they wanted to. His wife popped up at the office, several times, trying to catch him in the act. I’d heard them arguing over his actions, but after thirty-plus years together, his wife remained with him. That was their business, not mine. Even though she had questioned me about my involvement with him, I let it be known that I was only his administrative assistant. Nothing more, nothing less. She had much respect for me, and remained cordial each time she called or came into the office. Their daughter was the one I took issue with. She dated my son, Latrel, but seemed fake as ever. When I found out she’d had sex with Roc, when she’d told Latrel she was a virgin, she had to go. I was so glad that Latrel was now married to Angelique. They still had another semester and a half of college to finish, but my daughter-in-law was a jewel.

  I made copies of Mr. Anderson’s reports, then stopped by the lunchroom to get his soda. I chatted for a few minutes with some of the ladies I’d known from other departments, then headed back to Mr. Anderson’s office. As I swayed my wide hips from side to side, making my way down the carpeted hallway, I heard a whistle. I snapped my head to the right, seeing a man named Greg whom I’d dated a few times while Roc was in prison. Needless to say, things didn’t work out. Greg was a nerd and nerds I could not do.

  He stepped outside of his cubicle to check me out. “Looking good, Desa Rae. Sweetheart, you always look dynamite.”

  I stopped in my tracks, just to give him a forced smile. Too bad I couldn’t say the same for Greg. His suits were always too big on him and he looked slouchy. He was a nice man, though. I didn’t want to be disrespectful and not acknowledge him or his kind words. I walked over to his cubicle and stood inside to talk.

  “Thanks for the compliment, Greg. You don’t look bad yourself.”

  He blushed and dropped back in his swivel leather chair to take a seat. “Soooo, how have you been? I don’t see your boyfriend around here anymore, so I suspect the two of you must have broken up.”

  “Just because he doesn’t work here anymore, it doesn’t mean we’re not together.”

  Greg licked his lips and cleared his throat. “If you don’t mind me saying . . . I think you can do a lot better than him. He’s still wet behind the ears and you, Miss Thickety-thick, need a real man to handle you. I doubt that he can do it.”

  There he goes with that Thickety-thick mess again. Didn’t men know that it was an insult to say that to a healthy woman with curves? True to the fact or not, Greg was out of line. “Well, Mr. Boney-Maroni, if it takes a man who is still wet behind the ears to please me, so be it. You had your chance, and don’t discredit Roc for being all that I needed him to be.”

  “You said ‘needed,’ as in past tense. I guess that means the two of you aren’t together anymore, so why don’t you let me slide back in and take you to dinner? I can be everything you need me to be and then some.”

  I didn’t want to hurt Greg’s feelings, but Roc or no Roc, Greg was out of luck. “Sorry, Greg, I’m not interested anymore. Got other things on my mind right now and the last thing I need to be doing is going on dates. Besides, I’m still upset with you for telling Roc our business to begin with. Something about that whole thing rubbed me the wrong way, so I’d better leave well enough alone.”

  “Awww, come on, Desa Rae. All I did was answer the man’s questions. I didn’t think I was telling him something he should’ve already known.”

  “Well, he didn’t know. I was left with a bad taste in my mouth. I’m sure you understand. Good day, Greg. I’ll see you around.”

  Greg pursed his lips, but didn’t say another word as I walked away. When I got back to Mr. Anderson’s office, I stopped dead in my tracks at the doorway. Sitting in a chair in front of his desk was a young woman with long legs and eight-inch high heels. The tight skirt she wore barely covered her ass and the flowing weave down her back made her look like a stripper. She tossed her hair aside and scanned her eyes up and down me, from head to toe. Gold digger was written all over her, and even though Mr. Anderson was a handsome black man, I could tell this woman was interested in his money.

  “Come in,” he said to me. I stepped forward and reached out to give the copies, soda, and cup of ice to Mr. Anderson.

  “Thank you,” he said, then looked at his gold watch. “It’s almost lunchtime, Desa Rae. Do you have any plans?”

  “No, I’m going to sit at my desk and make some phone calls. I brought a tuna sandwich today anyway, so I’ll be at my cubicle if you need me.”

  “I have a meeting with Ms. Avery and won’t require your assistance for at least a few more hours. If you have some errands to run, go right ahead. Please close my door behind you.”

  “Sure,” was all I said, without looking at Ms. Avery, who had her legs crossed, wanting to be seen. Mr. Anderson’s so-called meeting wasn’t on his calendar. I suspected that when I returned, his office would be lit up with the smell of sex. Like the last time, I hoped he had some air freshener to kill the smell, but I guessed he would leave that up to me too.

  Before I had a chance to leave his office, Ms. Avery stood up, showing off her big butt and hourglass figure. She wanted me to see what Mr. Anderson was paying for, but little did she know I truly didn’t care.

  “I’m thirsty too,” she said, looking at me, then at Mr. Anderson. “Maybe you can make your secretary get me a soda before she goes to lunch.”

  My eyes narrowed. Before any words escaped from my mouth, Mr. Anderson spoke up. “I . . . I will get you something to drink. Have a seat and watch your tone.”

  She smirked at him, but did as she was told. It was obvious who had the upper hand, and Mr. Anderson’s scolding look told her to shut the hell up. I felt no need to comment. It was clear that some side hoes just didn’t know their place or when to keep their mouths shut. Excited that Mr. Anderson was allowing me to leave, I said good-bye to him and closed his door on my way out.

  While sitting in my car, I took bites of my tuna sandwich and downed a strawberry Vess soda. The sodas were killing me, and if I could cut back on them, I knew my weight would drop tremendously. I was still wearing a size fourteen to sixteen, and the only thing my doctor encouraged me to do was take walks. He insisted that walking contributed to having a healthy heart, so on a regular basis I took walks with Chassidy at the park. I couldn’t help but think about my conversation with her this
morning, and my thoughts quickly turned to Roc again. Knowing that I would hear that his phone was disconnected, I still dialed out to see if anything had changed. It hadn’t. I wasn’t sure where else I should turn, but I always knew I could get good advice from my best friend, Monica.

  Monica and I were supposed to go to Jamaica on my vacation, but since money was tight, she backed out on me. Yes, I was upset, but I understood her situation. She just didn’t have the money, and quite frankly, I didn’t have it to give. If I did, we would have been out of there tomorrow. Instead, I had planned to give my house an old-fashioned cleaning and get ready for the upcoming holidays—Thanksgiving and Christmas.

  “I know you’re still mad at me,” Monica said over the phone. “I really needed a vacation, Dee, but these kids done borrowed so much money from me, I barely have money for myself. That along with my bills ain’t no joke. This economy has to get better, and since the rich are the only ones getting richer, I may have to start looking for a rich man to throw in some help!”

  I laughed, but was grateful that Monica and I both had been handling our finances on our own for years. “I’m not mad, girl. Disappointed, yes, but we’ll go somewhere next year. Maybe by then we’ll both be married to wealthy men who can help get us out of these ruts!”

  “I agree. Wealthy, sexy, and good in bed. Don’t know if those kinds of men exist anymore, and you know the last man I went out with, Chance, was out of control. The way he carried on made me take a step back. I’m afraid to date again.”

  I giggled, thinking about what Monica had told me about her date. Chance was a man she’d met on a dating site. Monica had tried something different, but was disappointed when he showed up at a restaurant looking nothing like his profile picture. He was five feet four, had a bald head, and wore a round earring in his left ear. Monica said he looked like a mini pirate and I couldn’t stop laughing that day as she gave me the horrific details of their evening together. “That was an awful experience,” I said. “But don’t give up on relationships. Somebody is out there for you. He’ll come when you least expect it.”