I Can't Let Go

by Chenell Parker

  “Look at my baby. Come give your grandpa a big hug,” Alvin said as soon as he saw Santina. It seemed as if the only time he smiled was when he saw her. He looked like the grinch any other time.

  “I’m so happy to see you. Come give me a kiss,” Nita said as she kneeled closer to her granddaughter.

  “Ma, we have to go to New Orleans,” Kimora said, trying to keep her tears at bay.

  “Why? What’s wrong Kimora?” Nita said as she stood up and looked over at her. The smile on her face was replaced with a look of worry and concern.

  “Autumn just called me. Al and Prince got shot,” Kimora choked out.

  “No! Please don’t tell me that my baby is dead. I can’t go through that again. I can’t bury another one of my kids,” Nita said as she backed away until her back was up against the wall. She was shaking her head rapidly as tears poured from her eyes.

  “I don’t know ma, but we have to get there. Hassan is in the car right now booking us a flight.” Kimora replied.

  “I told that boy not to go back there. That’s exactly why I wanted to move,” Alvin fussed.

  “All of that is irrelevant right now daddy. We need to go make sure that he’s okay,” Kimora said.

  “I can’t just up and leave like that Kimora. I have a job and responsibilities here. I just got a promotion not even a year ago,” Alvin replied, making her look at him like he was crazy. Her mother ran to the back of the house and grabbed her purse and phone.

  “Let’s go,” Nita said as she rushed out of the house without so much as a goodbye to her husband.

  “Do you want to pack a bag ma?” Kimora asked.

  “No. I can’t even think straight right now. I just need to get out of here and see about my baby,” Nita said as she ran to Hassan’s car.

  “I’m on the phone with American Airlines. They’re searching for flights right now,” Hassan said as soon as they got into the car.

  “Just bring us straight to the airport,” Nita pleaded.

  “I have to get Winter,” Santina cried. She loved that dog more than life and Kimora knew that she couldn’t go all the way to New Orleans without her.

  “Where’s your father? Should I get him a ticket too?” Hassan asked.

  “No, just us,” Kimora replied.

  “Go get her dog Kimora. She won’t act right until you do,” Nita said as her leg bounced nervously.

  After going home to get Tina’s dog, Kimora packed her daughter a small bag and headed to the airport. Thankfully, they had a flight leaving out two hours after they got there. Kimora and her mother felt better once Autumn called back. Prince had only been shot once in the leg. Al was shot four times, but he was expected to survive. They removed all the bullets but one of them broke his arm. He was out of surgery and being put in ICU to recover. Once they landed, Autumn was there to pick them up and take them to the hospital. Kimora hadn’t been to New Orleans in years and she hated the reason why she had to come back. Since one of her aunts lived alone, she told them that they could stay with her. Kimora just had to lay low to make sure that she didn’t run into anybody that she didn’t want to see.

  “I can’t believe that muthafucker tried to rob us. We been doing business with that nigga for months now,” Prince fumed as Kimora changed the bandages on his leg wound.

  He and Al made the mistake of letting their guards down with the wrong nigga and almost lost their lives. They went to go make a two-thousand-dollar sale, but the dude tried to rob them instead. He started shooting the minute they went to hand him the dope. Al hurriedly tried to drive away but not before getting hit a few times. He drove about two blocks up before he stopped the car. He was too weak to drive, so Prince jumped behind the wheel and drove them to the hospital. They were rushed right into surgery when they got there, and he was thankful to the staff for calling Autumn.

  “Be happy that you and Al are alive,” Kimora replied.

  “That nigga wasn’t trying to leave us alive. His gun jammed and he had to run away. We know him, so he wasn’t trying to leave us breathing. His bitch was trying to take the dope and the money. It’s all good though. That was one of the worst mistakes that he could have ever made.” Prince frowned.

  Kimora and Tina had been staying at his house and he had been complaining the entire time. Instead of him being thankful that he was alive, he was talking about retaliating. It was Thanksgiving and Kimora felt like they had a lot to be thankful for. Her brother was out of ICU and healing better than they expected. Nita hadn’t left his side since she got there, and she didn’t plan to. Kimora went shopping the day after they got there since they didn’t bring anything with them. She even went to the grocery store and cooked an entire Thanksgiving meal. She had fixed some food for Al and her mother and she and Prince were about to go to the hospital.

  “Can I have some more cake mommy?” Tina asked when she walked into the room holding Winter.

  “My niece is so fucking pretty. You can have whatever you want baby.” Prince smiled at her.

  “You just had some cake Tina. Wait a little while,” Kimora said.

  “I see you learned your way around the kitchen. That food is banging,” Prince complimented.

  “Pinterest is my new best friend. I had to learn how to cook in Carmel. That food is nasty as fuck. I can barely even find fresh seafood there.” Kimora frowned, right as her phone rang. She walked out of the room before she answered for Hassan.

  “Happy Thanksgiving baby. How’s it going?” Hassan asked her.

  “Same to you. Everything is fine. We’re about to head back to the hospital in a few minutes,” Kimora replied.

  “Did your father ever make it?” Hassan asked.

  “No and I doubt if he will. I’m so done with him. I can’t believe he’s letting my mama go through this shit by herself,” Kimora said.

  “I’m just happy that your brother is okay. I miss you and my baby so much. I can’t wait for y’all to come home,” Hassan replied.

  “I know. I’m ready to come home too. Hopefully, we’ll be back this weekend. I know my mama will probably be here for a while. Al will need her help. He got staples in his stomach since they had to cut him open to get the bullets out,” Kimora noted.

  “Damn. Well, I won’t hold you. I’m about to head to my mama’s house for dinner. I wish you were here. This is our first Thanksgiving apart,” Hassan pointed out.

  “I know boo, but we’ll be home soon. Thankfully, I’ve been able to get some work done without falling behind. I’m happy that I thought to bring my laptop,” Kimora said.

  “Yeah, that’s a good thing. But, I’m gonna let you go baby. Call me the minute you get some free time. I love you,” Hassan replied.

  “I love you too,” Kimora said before they hung up. She grabbed her purse and got ready to leave. When she walked into the kitchen, she frowned when she saw Santina sitting at the table eating a huge piece of chocolate cake.

  “Uncle Prince gave me some cake,” Tina said with her mouth full.

  “Really Princeton?” Kimora frowned.

  “You know I can’t say no to her. Look at that face,” Prince said.

  “Just remember that when you have kids. I’m never saying no to them either,” Kimora replied.

  “You don’t even have that to worry about sis. I haven’t had that problem in years,” Prince laughed.

  Once Kimora cleaned Santina up, they left and were on their way to the hospital. She had basically taken over Prince’s black Yukon since she got there but he didn’t mind. He loved having his best friend there and he wished she didn’t have to leave.

  “Oh shit!” Kimora said as soon as they pulled up to the hospital. She damn near hit a parked car when she saw Dirty walking out. She was happy that the windows in the truck were tinted because he looked right in their direction. She shouldn’t have been surprised to see him there. After all, Al was his brother-in-law.

  “Get your scary ass out of the car. You need to stop with all that stupid shit,” Pr
ince fussed.

  “That nigga almost saw me,” Kimora replied.

  “I wish he would have,” Prince said as he grabbed Tina from the back seat.

  Kimora ignored him as she grabbed the bags of food and followed him into the hospital. When they got to the room, Al was sitting up in the bed and Nita was sitting on the sofa reading a book.

  “Hey pretty girl. Come give me a kiss.” Al smiled when he saw Santina.

  “Be careful baby. Remember, uncle is sick. You don’t want to hurt him,” Kimora said.

  “That food smells so good. I’m starving,” Nita said when Kimora handed her the bags.

  “Me too and I’m tired of eating this dog food that they been feeding me.” Al frowned.

  “Did they say when you can go home?” Kimora asked.

  “No time soon. They want him to use the bathroom to make sure that everything is working properly since they cut his stomach. His breathing is also not as good as it was before. He has to breathe in that machine a few times a day until he gets it to where they want it to be. I’m just happy that my baby is alive. I hope you don’t mind Prince but I’m gonna be staying with y’all until he gets better. I promise to stay out of your way as much as I can,” Nita said.

  “You can stay as long as you want to. We’re family and you’ll never be in my way. Besides, we can use a few home cooked meals,” Prince replied.

  “Me and Tina are gonna fly out this weekend, but we’ll be back in a few days,” Kimora said.

  “Dirty just left from up here,” Al told her.

  “I know. I saw him when we pulled up,” Kimora replied.

  “That’s messed up Kimora. That girl looks just like her daddy,” Al said while shaking his head.

  “Don’t start Al. I feel bad enough,” Kimora sighed.

  “Well, you need to do something about it,” Prince spoke up.

  “I’ve been thinking about it and I am. I don’t want my baby to grow up hating me because I kept her away from her father. I’m gonna talk to Hassan about it when I get back home. When I come back, I’m gonna reach out to Tino so they can meet,” Kimora said.

  “That’s what’s up sis. That’s a good look,” Al nodded in approval.

  Kimora spent her entire Thanksgiving in the hospital until Tina got cranky and was ready to go to bed. Once she got her daughter settled in, Kimora booked their flight home. She was sure that Hassan wasn’t going to be very happy about the decision that she made but it really had nothing to do with him. True, Kimora left New Orleans for the safety of herself and her unborn child, but almost four years had passed and that was way too long. She was sure that Tino was going to be pissed and he had every right to be. She just hoped that he understood why she did what she did. Leaving him was one of the hardest things that she ever had to do. But, for the safety of her baby, she wouldn’t hesitate to do it all over again.

  “T hanks bestie. We’ll see you in another week. I’ll let you know what time we’ll arrive,” Kimora said when Prince pulled up to the airport.

  “Bye uncle Prince,” Tina said as she climbed up front and hugged him.

  “Bye baby. Make sure you call me when y’all get home,” Prince said as Kimora hugged him.

  Kimora was happy that she’d made it out of New Orleans without being seen. Admittedly, she missed home and she had probably gained a few pounds from all the eating she did. She grabbed Winter’s carryon bag before she and Tina headed inside the terminal. She checked them in and went to the gate where their flight was departing. They had a little over an hour before departure, so Kimora gave Tina her phone while she got on her laptop.

  “Can I go watch the planes go up mommy?” Santina asked.

  “Yes, but don’t go anywhere else. And keep Winter on her leash or she’s going back in the bag,” Kimora replied.

  “Okay. Come on Winter,” Tina said as they went and stood by the huge windows.

  Kimora kept her eyes on her, even though she was only a few feet away. Tina was too excited to see all the planes coming and going. She had been on a plane a few times and it never got old to her. Kimora checked and replied to a few emails as she waited to board the plane.

  “This must be my lucky day,” someone whispered in her ear.

  Kimora closed her eyes as her heart did flipflops in her chest. Even if she didn’t recognize the voice, she would never forget the smell of his cologne. Her breath got caught in her throat when she turned around and locked eyes with Tino. Time stood still as she quickly reminisced on all the time they spent together. All the years that she’d been away did nothing to diminish the feelings that she still had for him. Kimora thought that it was impossible for him to look any better, but she was mistaken. Tino didn’t even look like half of what he had been through and he hadn’t aged at all. He was a little more muscular than he was before, but time had been good to him.

  “Hey,” Kimora said for lack of anything better to say.

  “It’s been almost four years Kimora. I know you can do better than that. Get up and give a nigga a hug or something,” Tino said as he pulled her up from her seat.

  He’d heard about her brother and best friend being shot, so he wasn’t really surprised to see her there. His flight from Miami was delayed and he was happy as fuck. He thought he was tripping when he walked through the airport and saw her sitting there. Instead of the highlights, her entire head was colored in honey blonde and it was much longer. Kimora looked the same or he thought she did until she stood up. She had gotten a little thicker, but it was in all the right places. Her stomach was still flat as ever, but her ass was something serious. Kimora looked like a brick house and Tino was ready to hop on a plane and go wherever she was going. All the anger that he’d felt for her in the past was quickly forgotten. She was still the love of his life and that probably would never change. She was even more beautiful now than she was when he first laid eyes on her.

  “You look good.” Kimora smiled awkwardly once they pulled away from a brief hug.

  “And you look fucking great,” he complimented while licking his lips. He was staring at her, but he couldn’t help it. He hadn’t seen Kimora in so long and he was happy as hell. He couldn’t stop smiling at her until they were interrupted.

  “Mommy, I’m thirsty,” Santina said when she walked over to them.

  Tino tore his eyes away from Kimora and looked down at the beauty who was standing in front of them. From her long curly hair, to the color of her skin, she looked like a small female version of him. When she looked up at him and smiled, he instantly fell in love with her.

  “Bitch, I’m bout to kill you,” Tino whispered to Kimora.

  There were no words to describe the feelings that he had. His emotions were all over the place, but anger was the more dominant one. There was no excuse in the world that Kimora could give that would make him understand. She was dead ass wrong and he wanted to snap her neck right there with hundreds of witnesses around.

  “I can explain,” Kimora said.

  “Explain to me why I shouldn’t choke the life out of you in this crowded ass airport,” Tino gritted.

  “Mommy, I want some juice,” Santina whined.

  “Okay baby,” Kimora replied.

  “Get your shit and let’s go. Ain’t no muthafucking way in hell you’re about to get on no plane,” Tino fumed.

  “Tino-” Kimora said before he cut her off.

  “This is not up for discussion Kimora. You can call the police and take me to court if you want to. Either way it goes, she’s coming with me,” he replied as he nodded towards Santina.

  “Come on baby,” Kimora sighed as she grabbed her laptop bag and purse.

  Tino smiled as he watched Santina put Winter in her bag and follow her mother. They stopped and got her something to drink as he ordered an Uber to pick them up.

  “What’s her name?” Tino asked as they walked through the airport.

  “Ask her,” Kimora snapped in disgust.

  “You better be lucky that I don�
�t have my gun on me. I would shoot your ass right here and now,” Tino threatened as he frowned at her.

  He and Kimora had a lot to talk about, but he didn’t want to go to his house to do it. Venus had a key and he didn’t need her popping up on him. He had so many questions that he needed answers to. Once again, he felt betrayed by someone in his family. Dirty had to know that his wife’s sister had his baby. He knew how bad Tino wanted kids and he kept that away from him. The logical part told him that Dirty didn’t even know but he didn’t know what to believe anymore. He really couldn’t see his cousin keeping something so important from him.