The Soldier's Secret Child

by Lee Tobin McClain

  “As far as getting married,” she said, “you could have any woman you wanted.”

  A muscle contracted in his scarred cheek. “Don’t, Lace.”

  “Don’t what?” She stumbled on a root and he automatically caught her arm, steadied her.

  “Don’t lie to me. If I couldn’t get the girls before, I’m not going to get them now.”

  “I’m not lying. You have a...” She paused, considering how to say it. “You have a rugged appeal.”

  “Is that so?” He looked over at her, his expression skeptical.

  For some reason, her face heated, and she lifted it to cool in the breeze from the river. She focused on the birdcalls and blue sky, visible through a network of green leaves, while she tried to get her bearings.

  When she looked back at him, he was still watching her. “Think of Tiffany Townsend,” she said, trying to sound offhand. “She was all over you.”

  He rolled his eyes, just a little, making her remember him as a teen. “Tiffany Townsend isn’t what I want.”

  “What do you want?”

  Instead of answering, he walked a few paces to the right and lifted a streamer of honeysuckle growing against a thick strand of trees. Beyond it was a cave-like depression in a natural rock wall. “Wonder if kids are still carving their names in here?”

  She laughed. “Lover’s Cave. I’d forgotten about it.” She followed him inside, the temperature dropping a good few degrees, making a chill rise up on her arms.

  Vito pinched off a vine of honeysuckle flowers, inhaled their scent, and then tucked them into Lacey’s hair. “For a lovely lady.”

  Wow. Why wasn’t Vito married by now? He was chivalrous, a natural romantic. Who wouldn’t want to be with a man like that?

  Inside the small enclosure, she turned to him, then stepped back, feeling overwhelmed by the closeness. Make conversation; this is awkward. “Did you ever kiss a girl in here?”

  He laughed outright. “My nonna taught me better than to kiss and tell. Why? Were you kissed in here?”

  “No.” She remembered bringing Gerry down to the river, showing him the sights of her younger days. She’d hoped to finally get a kiss in Lover’s Cave, but he hadn’t wanted to follow her inside. Romantic gestures weren’t his thing, but that was okay. He’d loved her; she was sure of that.

  “What was wrong with the boys in your grade? Why didn’t you get kissed here?”

  “Guys didn’t like my type.” She turned away, catching a whiff of honeysuckle.

  He touched her face, making her look at him. “What type is that?”

  “Shy. Backward.”

  “Are you still?”

  Lacey’s heart was pounding. “I...I might be.”

  His fingers still rested on her cheek, featherlight. “Don’t be nervous. It’s just me.”

  A hysterical giggle bubbled up inside her, along with a warm, melty breathlessness. She couldn’t look away from him.

  He cupped her face with both hands. Oh, wow, was he really going to kiss her? Her heart was about to fly out of her chest and she blurted out the first nervous thought she had. “You never answered my question.”

  “What was it? I’m getting distracted.” He smiled a little, but his eyes were intense, serious.

  He was incredibly attractive, scars and all.

  “I asked you,” she said breathlessly, “what do you want, if you don’t want someone like Tiffany?”

  “I want...” He paused, looked out through the veil of honeysuckle vines and let his hands fall away from her face. Breathed in, breathed out, audibly, and then eased out of the cave, holding the honeysuckle curtain for her, but careful not to touch her. “I want what I can’t have.”

  Suddenly chilled, Lacey rubbed her bare arms, looking away from him. Whatever Vito wanted, it was obviously not her.

  Chapter Seven

  “Come on, Nonna, let’s go sit on the porch.” Vito was walking his grandmother out of the kitchen after dinner. Nonna hadn’t eaten much of it despite his and Charlie’s cajoling. Vito wished Lacey had stayed to eat with them, but she’d had something else urgent to do.

  Most likely, urgently avoiding him. And rightly so. He was avoiding her, too, and kicking himself for that little romantic interlude in Lover’s Cave.

  “I’m a little tired for the porch, dear.” Nonna held tightly on to his arm.

  She sounded depressed, something Lacey had mentioned was common in patients recovering from a heart attack. Activity and socializing were part of the solution, so Vito pressed on. “But you’ve been in your room all day. A talk and a little air will do you good.”

  “Well...” She paused. “Will you sit with me?”

  “Nothing I’d rather do.” He kissed her soft cheek, noticing the fragrance of lavender that always clung to her, and his heart tightened with love.

  He and Nonna walked slowly down the guesthouse hall. She still clung to his arm, and when they got to the bench beside the door, she stopped. “I’ll just...rest here a minute. Could you get me another glass of that iced tea? I’m so thirsty.”

  “Sure.” He settled her on the bench and went back to the kitchen to pour iced tea, looking out into the driveway to see if, by chance, Lacey had come in without his noticing. He’d feel better if she were here. Only because Nonna wasn’t feeling well.

  When he reached the guesthouse door with the tea, he saw that Nonna was already out on the porch. “Charlie helped me out,” she said, gesturing to where the boy was shooting hoops across the street. “He’s a good boy.”

  He set their tea on the table between the rocking chairs and sat down. The evening air was warm, but the humidity was down and the light breeze made for comfortable porch-sitting. In fact, several people were outside down the block, in front of the Senior Towers. A young couple walked by pushing a stroller, talking rapidly in Spanish. Marilyn Smith strolled past the basketball hoop with her Saint Bernard, and Charlie and his friend stopped playing to pet it and ask her excited questions.

  Evening in a small town. He loved it here.

  “Tell me about your course work, dear,” Nonna said. “Is it going well?”

  “Just finished a couple of modules today. It’s interesting material.”

  “And you like taking a class on the computer?”

  He shrugged. “Honestly, I’d rather be in a classroom where I could talk and listen, but we don’t have a college here, and this is the easiest, cheapest option.”

  “That’s just what Lou Ann Miller says. She’s almost done with her degree. At her age!”

  They chatted on about Vito’s courses and Lou Ann and other people they knew in common, greeted a few neighbors walking by.

  After a while, Vito noticed that Nonna had gotten quiet, and he looked over to see her eyes blinking closed. In the slanting evening sunlight, her skin looked wrinkled like thin cloth, and her coloring wasn’t as robust as he’d have liked to see.

  Lacey’s little car drove into the driveway. She pulled behind the guesthouse, and moments later the back screen door slammed. Normally, she’d have come in by the front porch, stopping to pull a couple of weeds from the flower bed and say hello to Nonna. So she was still avoiding him, obviously, but at least she was home in case Nonna needed her.

  Nonna started awake and looked around as if she was confused. “Tell me about your courses, dear,” she said.

  “We just talked about that.” Vito studied her. “Are you feeling okay? Do you want to go inside?”

  “I’m fine. I meant your job hunt. Tell me about your job hunt.” She smiled reassuringly, looking like her old self.

  “I keep seeing jobs that look interesting, but they’re all in person.” He paused, then added, “I want an online job.”

  As usual, Nonna read his mind. “You can’t hide for
ever,” she said, patting his hand.

  “You’re right, and I’m a coward for wanting to hide behind the computer. Except...would you want your kids to have a scary teacher?”

  “I’d want them to have a smart, caring teacher. And besides, once people get to know you, they forget about those little scars. I have.”

  It was what Lacey had said, too. It was what Troy had said. It was even what his friends in the VA support group said. He didn’t know why he was having such a hard time getting over his scarred face.

  And okay, he was bummed for a number of reasons. If things had been different, if Charlie hadn’t needed a home and if he hadn’t been so scarred, then maybe he and Lacey could have made a go of things. She’d seemed a little interested, for a minute there.

  But things weren’t different, and he needed to focus on the here and now, and on those who needed him. He glanced over at Nonna.

  She was slumped over in her chair at an odd angle, her eyes closed.

  “Nonna!” He leaped up and tried a gentle shake of her shoulders that failed to wake her. “Charlie, come here!” he called over his shoulder.

  He lifted his grandmother from the chair and carried her to the door just as Charlie arrived and opened it for him. “Is she okay?” Charlie asked.

  “Not yet. Get Lacey, now!” Vito carried Nonna into her bedroom and set her gently on the bed. He should never have encouraged her to go out on the porch. On the other hand, what if she’d fainted in her room, alone? What had brought this on? Up until tonight she’d seemed to be improving daily.

  Lacey burst into the room, stethoscope in hand, and bent over the bed, studying Nonna. “What happened?”

  “She wasn’t feeling well, and then she passed out.”

  Lacey took her pulse and listened. “It’s rapid but...” She stopped, listened again. “It’s settling a bit.” She opened Nonna’s bedside drawer and pulled out a pen-like device, a test strip, and some kind of a meter. “I’m going to test her blood sugar.”

  Charlie hovered in the door of the room as Lacey pricked Nonna’s finger, and Vito debated sending him away. But he and Nonna were developing a nice friendship, and Charlie deserved to be included in what was going on.

  Nonna’s eyes fluttered open. She was breathing fast, like she’d run a race.

  Vito’s throat constricted, looking at her. She was fragile. Why hadn’t he realized how fragile she was?

  Lacey frowned at the test strip, left the room and returned with a hypodermic needle. “Little pinch,” she said to Nonna as she extracted clear liquid from a small bottle and injected her arm. “Your blood sugar is through the roof. What happened? It hasn’t been this high in weeks!”

  There was a snuffling sound from the doorway; Charlie was crying. Vito held out an arm, and Charlie ran and pressed beside him, looking at Nonna with open worry.

  Lacey propped Nonna up and sat on the bed, holding her hand. “Are you feeling better? You passed out.”

  “Was it the cake?” Charlie blurted out.

  Vito’s head spun to look at the boy at the same time Lacey’s did. “What cake?” they asked in unison.

  Charlie pressed his lips together and looked at Nonna, whose expression was guilty.

  “I...I gave him money...” Nonna broke off and leaned back against the pillow, her eyes closing.

  “What happened?” Vito set Charlie in front of him, put his hands on the boy’s shoulders and studied him sternly. “Tell the truth.”

  “She gave me money and asked me to get her cake from the bakery. I didn’t know what to do! I wanted her to have a treat. She said it would be our secret. And she gave me the rest of the money so I could get something, too.” Charlie was crying openly now. “I’m sorry! I didn’t know it would hurt her.”’

  Vito shook his head and patted the boy’s shoulder, not sure whether to comfort or punish him. “Remember, you’re supposed to come ask me, not just go do something another adult tells you to do. Even if it’s Nonna.”

  “Is she going to be okay?”

  “She’ll be okay.” Lacey gave Charlie’s hand a quick squeeze. “But your dad’s right. Don’t ever bring her something to eat again without asking one of us.”

  Even in the midst of his worries, Vito noticed that Lacey had automatically called him Charlie’s dad. He liked the sound of that.

  But he was second-guessing himself for bringing Charlie to live here at all. The kid was eight. He didn’t know how to properly assist in the care of a very sick elderly woman, and he didn’t have an idea of consequences.

  Nonna said something, her voice weak, and Lacey put a hand on Charlie’s arm. “Let’s listen to Nonna.”

  “I...told him...to do it. Not his fault.” She offered up a guilty smile that was a shadow of her usual bright one.

  “Nonna! This is serious. We’re going to have to take you to the emergency room to get you checked out.”

  “Oh, no,” Nonna said as Charlie broke into fresh tears. “I just want to rest.”

  Lacey bit her lip and looked at Vito. “I might be able to talk Dr. Griffin into coming over to take a look at her,” she said. “It would be exhausting for her to go to the ER, and I think she’s going to be okay once her sugar comes down, but I’m not qualified to judge.”

  “If you could do that, I’d be very grateful.” He knew that old Dr. Griffin lived right down the street.

  “Okay. Charlie, would you like to come help me get the doctor?”

  Charlie nodded, sniffling.

  “Could you run upstairs and get my purse out of my bedroom?”

  “Sure!” Charlie ran.

  Vito was grateful. Lacey had every reason to be angry at the boy, but she was instead helping him to feel better by giving him a job. But that was how she was: forgiving, mature, wise beyond her years.

  “Doc owes me a favor,” Lacey said quietly to Vito. “I’m sure he’ll come, if he’s home. Just sit with her until we get back. It’ll only be five minutes.”

  He nodded, gently stroking Nonna’s arm, and Lacey and Charlie went out the door.

  Beside Nonna’s bed was a photo of him and his brother as children. She’d taken them in and raised them after their parents’ accident, putting aside her bridge games and bus trips to rejoin the world of PTA meetings and kids’ sporting events. And she’d done it with such good cheer that he’d never, until recently, understood the burden it must have been to her.

  Now it was time for him to return the favor. To make sure that she was getting the very best care she could.

  Which meant that later tonight if, God willing, Nonna was okay, Vito needed to have a very serious talk with Lacey.

  * * *

  After ushering Doc Griffin out the door with profuse thanks, Lacey walked back into the guesthouse as Vito emerged from Nonna’s room, gently closing her door behind him.

  “She’s already asleep,” he said. “She’s exhausted, but she said to tell you again that she’s sorry.”

  Lacey shook her head and paced the hall. “I’m the one who should be sorry. I should have been keeping closer track of her food.”

  “She’s an adult,” Vito said. “She made a choice.” But something in his voice told her he didn’t completely believe what he was saying, and what he said next confirmed it. “If you have a minute, could we talk?”

  “Of course.” She gestured for him to come into the front sitting room as her heart sank.

  She’d been avoiding him hard all week, since that crazy moment in Lover’s Cave. She’d thought he was going to kiss her, and she was sure that expectation had shone on her face. But instead of doing it, he’d gently pushed her away from him.

  He was too kind to give her a real rejection, but even his careful one had made her feel like a loser.

  He stood in the middle of the room,
looking more masculine than ever amidst the delicate Victorian furnishings, and she realized he was waiting for her to sit down first. Who had those kind of manners these days?

  Vito, that was who. And she was starting to care for him more than she should. Even though he didn’t return the feelings, and nothing would come of it, she felt guilty. What would Gerry think if he knew that she was looking at his best friend in a way she’d once reserved for him?

  Or, if the truth be told, in a different way but with the same end game? Because there weren’t two men in the world more different than Vito and Gerry. And while Gerry’s confidence and swagger had swept her away when she was young, Vito’s warm and caring style appealed to her now.

  He was still standing, waiting, so she sank down onto the chesterfield and pulled her feet up under her, leaving Vito to take the matching chair. It was a little small for him. Good. Maybe this conversation would be brief.

  He cleared his throat. “I was wondering if you’ve been avoiding me.”

  Lacey felt her eyebrows shoot up, and against her will, heat rose into her cheeks. “Avoiding you?”

  He nodded patiently. “After what happened last weekend. You know, at Lover’s Cave.”

  She blew out a breath. She’d hoped to avoid that topic, but here he was bringing it out into the open to deal with. “I, um...” She wanted to lie, but couldn’t bring herself to do it. “Maybe a little,” she admitted.

  “I thought so.” He leaned forward, elbows on knees, and held her gaze. “You don’t have to worry about a repeat. And you don’t have to stay away from your own house to keep me at bay.”

  Keep him at bay? But of course, chivalrous to the core, Vito would put it like that. Make it seem like she was the one rejecting him, when in point of fact, it had been the other way around.

  She swallowed and tore her eyes away from his. And for the life of her, she couldn’t think of what to say.

  How could she respond when she didn’t even know what she felt, herself? When these feelings about Vito tugged at her loyalty to Gerry, even making her question some of her husband’s behaviors? When Vito didn’t seem to share her attraction at all?