Earning Edie (Espinoza Boys #1)

by D. J. Jamison

  A knock came at the door.

  “Yeah?” I called.

  The door inched open, and Cyn peered inside, her lips formed into a pout. “Wanna help Mama and me bake cookies? Tony won’t do anything but eat the ingredients!”

  I smiled, though I knew it was the shadow of the grin I’d usually call up.

  “That’s my brother for ya,” I said easily. “He’s a greedy little bastard.”

  Tony’s head appeared in the doorway above Cyn’s. “Not greedy enough to steal my brother’s wife.”

  “I didn’t steal—” I started, a wave of shame spilling over me.

  At the same time, Cyn shouted, “Tony!”

  He stepped back from the door, but I heard his reply as he walked off. “Can’t help it if the truth hurts!”

  Ouch.

  He was right. The truth did hurt, and Tony wouldn’t let me forget it. But instead of dwelling on Elana, his words made me think of Edie again.

  I subconsciously reached for my cellphone — its screen dark — and cursed myself again for letting the battery drain completely. I’d had this urge to reconnect with her all day. After last night, I felt certain there was hope for us.

  “Damn,” I muttered, and plugged in the charging cable. The screen remained blank save for the battery icon that showed it was charging.

  “What?” Cyn asked.

  I’d forgotten she was standing there.

  “My phone’s dead—” I paused as the screen lit up. “Wait! It’s alive. Thank, God!”

  “Wow. Do you two need a minute alone?” Cyn asked, and I realized I was grinning like an idiot.

  I wanted to call. Now.

  “Actually, yeah.”

  “Huh?”

  I glanced up impatiently. “I have to make a call. So yeah, I want to be alone with my phone.”

  “A phone call. Riiiight,” she joked as she headed into the hall.

  I glanced down at my notifications to see I missed a call and a text message. My gaze flew to the time display: 8 p.m.

  Damn.

  The text came two hours ago. The phone call before that.

  My phone died sometime in the afternoon, but by then I’d been writing up my stories, so I didn’t notice. Then I’d driven to Mama’s in a state of exhaustion, and let the delicious scents lead me to dinner without a thought for my phone.

  Now, I’d missed the perfect opportunity to make things right with Edie.

  I read the text again: Thank you for last night. Can you come by J’s so we can talk?

  That was it. Just one text message in which she offered to let me in instead of shutting me out.

  Resolved to fight to the bitter end for Edie, I rushed out a text: On M Wy

  Then I leapt from the chair and grabbed my keys. Before I reached the door, it opened.

  “Not now,” I said before Cyn could open her mouth. “I have to go.”

  I attempted to brush past her, but she placed a hand to my shoulder, pushing me back. “Wait a sec. Go where?”

  “Just go!”

  I nudged her aside gently and hurried down the hall, resisting the urge to run. Cyn chased after me.

  “Wait, Nick!”

  Jesus, she was relentless.

  “Goddamn it, Cyn!” I whirled, ready to bare my soul if it would get me out the door. “I have to find Edie, okay? This might be my only chance to fix things, so just let me go!”

  To my surprise, a smile stretched across her face. “If you want to see Edie, you shouldn’t leave.”

  Cyn turned and pointed toward the parlor we never used. “She’s right in there. Waiting for you.”

  I stared blankly past her, my mind trying to process it. “She’s here?”

  Cyn nodded enthusiastically.

  “Yup! She seemed worried you might not want to see her, but I told her—”

  I’d never know what Cyn told her. I didn’t wait to find out.

  I rushed past her and into the parlor, lurching to a stop when Edie turned from the fireplace mantel, a family photo in her hands and a startled expression on her face.

  ***

  I rushed into the room, nerves buzzing with adrenaline and the rush of fresh hope. She had come to me.

  Her smile trembled. “Hi.”

  Brown eyes took in my appearance, and I knew I looked like crap. My clothes were wrinkled and my hair was a mess. I hadn’t washed, much less styled, it today. But for once I didn’t care because I knew Edie would see past all that.

  I was more worried about the missed messages. Afraid of what she might say if I waited to long, I launched into an explanation and was horrified to hear the torrent of panicky babble that poured out.

  “I wasn’t ignoring you on purpose! My phone was dead. I should have charged it hours ago. I was just going to meet you at Jaime’s.”

  I held up my keys, jingling them as evidence of my intent, with an embarrassed smile.

  “Yeah, I know.” She held up my cellphone. “I got your message, but Cynthia was already on her way to get you.”

  My whole body sagged in relief, and I worked to pull it together.

  “So, what brings you to Casa de Espinoza?”

  Edie frowned, despite the grin I’d pasted on to lighten the moment and deflect from my embarrassing panic over missing her message.

  I braced for a typical Edie lecture, but she hesitated, gazing over my shoulder.

  I turned to see Cynthia watching from the doorway.

  “Uh, Cyn, how about you give us a minute?”

  “Oh!” Her gaze went from me to Edie and back. “Yeah, okay. I’ll be in the kitchen. Maybe Edie can join us after you talk.”

  Cyn continued to linger as her words trailed off. There was a stupid grin on her face.

  “Cyn,” I repeated, trying not to grind my teeth.

  “I’m going! Sorry!”

  She dashed out of the room, leaving a heavy silence behind her. I turned to Edie, feeling tension settle between us.

  “So,” I prompted.

  She twisted her hands together and looked at the floor, studying the old oak in need of refinishing as if it was fascinating.

  “Let me make it easy for you,” I said.

  She jerked her head up, looking at me warily.

  “I made a lot of mistakes. First, that interview I never should have done. God, I still can’t believe your parents. I didn’t consider the consequences of what I was doing, but that’s no excuse.”

  I ran a hand through my hair nervously and babbled before my courage failed me.

  “I’ve been selfish in my life. I didn’t even see it before I met you. I was just used to getting what I wanted. I never meant to be a bad person.

  “I know I screwed up, Eeds. I know it was wrong of me to look to you as an escape from my Elana drama. I had to clean up that mess in order to start fresh. I understand that now. And it was stupid of me to be so irate about that credit card. Of course you were angry with me back then. I got you kicked out of your house.”

  I stopped to take a deep breath, and Edie jumped in as if she’d been waiting for an opening.

  “I haven’t exactly been fair to you, Nick.”

  This was news to me, and it must have shown on my face.

  She cracked a smile. “Don’t look so shocked. I can admit when I’m wrong too.”

  I just shook my head, baffled. “Wrong about the credit card? Forget it. It doesn’t matter. I’m sorry I overreacted.”

  “No, not the credit card.” She closed the small distance between us, leaving just a few inches between our bodies, and looked up at me. “Well, yes the credit card. That was wrong. But, really, I mean I was wrong about you.”

  Her eyes cut away from me, and she twisted her fingers. I wasn’t the only ball of nerves in the room.

  “I called you selfish, but I’m selfish too. I berated you for wanting me to play pretend, and here I’ve been playing pretend with Jaime—” she stopped short, her voice wavering.

  I hated the pain in her expressio
n as she said his name. In my quest to have her, I’d never stopped to consider she might care about him. I’d told her he was gay without a single thought for how it might affect her beyond her dating status.

  I deserved to watch the girl I loved cry over another guy.

  “Edie,” I whispered, as a tear trailed down her cheek. “Why are you crying? Is it because of Jaime?”

  She stepped back from me, and her gaze snapped to mine. “No, you dummy!” She laughed a watery laugh. “I’m crying because of you.”

  My heart sank. “God, I’m sorry.”

  She looked at me with an incredulous look on her face. “Are you really that blind? Or are you just pretending?”

  I bristled. “Did you come here to insult me?”

  “No!” she cried. “I came here to—”

  She stopped, and made a frustrated sound.

  Then she kissed me.

  It happened fast. Edie grabbed my face and jerked my head down. Our lips connected in a hard kiss. It was almost painful as Edie’s fingers tightened in my hair. She grabbed handfuls and jerked me closer to her, turning my head so she could meet my mouth more fully.

  I’d never experienced this assertive Edie. I’d always controlled our kisses before.

  This was something else. Something hot.

  I loved every second of it.

  When I was sure I’d pass out for lack of air, she pulled back.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, baffling me even more. Not that I was thinking clearly.

  “Don’t be sorry,” I said, only half joking. “You can kiss me anytime you want.”

  “Not that.” She huffed a laugh before turning serious again. “I’m sorry I was so harsh on you. I shouldn’t have judged you.”

  I took her hands in mine. “I’m glad you judged me.”

  It was her turn to look baffled.

  “You make me a better person. I know that sounds like some cheesy line, but I mean it. I needed a wake-up call. I don’t want to be the guy you met at that party. I sure as hell don’t want to be the guy who betrayed his brother. I want to be something more. I want to deserve you, so we can be something more.

  “Is that something you might want, too … to give us a real shot?”

  I held my breath, almost afraid to hear her answer.

  She spoke immediately, emphatically. “Yes.”

  A smile spread across my face, and I pulled her to me and kissed her, more gently this time. Most of our kisses had been in the heat of the moment, pure fireworks. We definitely had major sparks. I’d been kidding myself to ever think otherwise. But this kiss was the slow burn of love and desire.

  I caressed her lips with mine softly, my heart aching at how close I’d come to losing her. I wanted her to understand what she meant to me. She wasn’t a solution to my Elana dilemma, she was the answer to my life.

  Her arms slid around my neck, and her fingers curled into my hair. I shivered as her nails grazed my scalp. When she pressed closer, the lines of her body molded to mine and my slow burn instantly turned into an inferno.

  I moaned against her mouth, and there was no doubt she was feeling my love and then some. I was so hard I ached for her.

  Edie pulled back.

  “Nick,” she said a little breathlessly, which turned me on more. “You know I’m not all that experienced, right? Even though we got close, I’m not sure I’m ready to sleep with you yet.”

  That was more than okay with me. I was secretly happy my girlfriend was a virgin. I wanted to be Edie’s first everything, and I was more than willing to wait for the right moment.

  “Yeah, I kind of figured when you told me you’d never been kissed. I mean, I’m assuming Jaime didn’t. …”

  I trailed off as a sobering thought struck me. Plenty of gay men in the closet slept with their girlfriends or wives. But Edie shook her head, and the churning in my stomach eased.

  She frowned. “That’s right. I remember you made some comment like you were doing me a favor.”

  She withdrew from me, and I grabbed her hand before she could put much distance between us. It was time to stop letting misunderstandings come between us.

  “Hey,” I said softly as she looked down, insecure once more. I tilted her chin with one finger so she’d look me in the eye. “That kiss was amazing, and it meant something to me. I just made that stupid comment because I thought I’d freaked you out, and I was afraid of rejection.”

  Edie looked at me with wide eyes. “You? Afraid of rejection?”

  “Come on, I have feelings too.”

  She smiled. “I know. I’m learning these things. Who knew that boys, even with that hideous cooty disorder, could still have feelings?”

  I appreciated her attempt to lighten the moment and give me the benefit of the doubt. But I didn’t want her to doubt me, or this thing between us.

  “Edie, I need you to trust me. When I say I love you, I want you to believe me.”

  She took a sharp breath, and I realized I’d let the L word slip.

  “Shit, and I can’t even do this right,” I said.

  Clearing my throat nervously as she watched me like she couldn’t quite figure me out, I took a deep breath.

  “I love you, Edie. It’s pretty obvious to most people. I’m pretty sure Tequila knows. And Mama, and Cyn … and, well, Tony too,” I said, my tone rueful.

  Edie gave a laugh thick with emotion as my list grew.

  “I didn’t say the words because I wanted you to hear it first. But I’ve loved you for so long now I said it in passing like I’d said it a million times before. I guess I have in my mind. I’m sorry for how that came out.”

  She shook her head, a smile playing around her lips. “Don’t ever apologize for saying you love me, no matter how you say it.”

  She took my hand and squeezed it. “I love you too. I was just afraid, and it was hard for me to believe you cared … but that’s my problem. It’s my insecurity.”

  “Hey, if it’s your problem, it’s my problem, okay? Eeds, if anyone should be terrified here, it’s me.”

  She looked even more doubtful at that statement.

  “I’m serious,” I said, enthusiastic as I warmed up to my argument. “I’ve had a lot of girlfriends—”

  “Great,” she muttered.

  “—so, I know this is the real deal. I’ve never felt this way about anyone, ever. But you’re a lot younger than me. You don’t have a lot of dating history, and you’re getting ready to go to college. You think you want me now, but you’ll meet a lot of new people this year. I’ll just end up being one in a long line of guys to fall for you.”

  She laughed and shook her head.

  “Can we not have me dumping you before we’ve officially begun our relationship, please?”

  “Oh, we’ve started our relationship.” Pulling out my phone, I checked the time. “We’re at least a good 5 minutes into it. You, Edie Mason, are my girlfriend.”

  She laughed. “Wow, that sounds weird.”

  “It sounds good to me.”

  “Nick Espinoza is my hot Italian loverrrr,” she said, turning the last word into a sexy purr.

  Oh, yeah. I liked the sound of that.

  Grinning, I tilted my head down for another kiss. Just as our lips met, a squeal startled us apart.

  “Really?”

  We both turned to see Mama there, her hands clasped before her heart. I could see Cyn over her shoulder, cringing.

  “I tried to stop her,” Cyn said.

  Edie turned bright red.

  “Oh my gosh,” she mumbled, putting a hand to her cheek. No doubt she was regretting that lover comment now, but I was enjoying the rose flush on her face. I grinned, and when she tried to step free of me, pulled her in tighter against my side.

  Mama waved a hand, unconcerned by Cyn’s words. Instead, she charged into the room and yanked Edie into a big hug, breaking my firm hold on Edie’s waist.

  “Welcome to the family!”

  Edie’s eyes went wide, a
nd I choked on a laugh. “Mama, we’re dating, not married.”

  “Shush you,” she said, shaking a finger at me, and turned back to Edie. “Don’t you listen to him. You’re in the family now. I’ve never seen my boy so taken with a girl. You must be something special.”

  Edie’s cheeks, already pink, darkened further.

  Honestly, I probably should have been embarrassed, too. In the past, I would have flipped out if Mama had treated a girlfriend like a member of the family the day we started dating. Edie was different. I’d already committed to her, in my heart, for the long haul.

  “Oh, she is, Mama,” I said, grinning at Edie’s discomfort. “She’s the best.”

  “Well, let’s go make cookies,” Mama said, and dragged Edie into the hall.

  My mouth dropped open. Cyn looked at me with a smirk.

  “Did Mama seriously just bogart my girlfriend?” I asked incredulously.

  Cynthia laughed loudly. “Just eat the cookies and tell Edie they’re great.”

  I nodded absentmindedly as I followed her down the hall.

  “Apply that advice to everything Edie does, and you’ll be good to go.”

  “Ha-ha,” I said dryly.

  When we reached the kitchen, I watched Edie getting down the flour and fetching other ingredients as Mama called them out. Warmth filled my chest. The burden of my terrible secret had finally lifted. Edie had just been a quiet girl sitting in a stairwell on a night I was desperate for a story.

  Little did I know she’d become the story of my life.

  ###

  Sneak Peek:

  “Catching Jaime”

  Tony Espinoza

  The first time I noticed Jaime Harris, I mean really noticed him, it was the worst moment of his life.

  We stood on the beach of a Kansas lake, a group of high school and college students doing what we do best on a hot summer night: getting shitfaced.

  Party-goers gathered along a stretch of the lake, with beers in their hands and a number of trash barrels serving as campfires. Not that we needed them for warmth; it was July, which meant triple-digit heat. Now that the sun had gone down, the wind drifting in over the water was just cool enough to keep me from sweltering in my muscle T and basketball shorts. The barrel fires were used mainly for lighting, both to see by and to ignite burning sticks of cancer. Those weren’t really my thing.