Yours

by Aubrey Dark

  “Here,” he said. He ripped off a small piece of bread for me so that I wouldn’t have to tear it myself with my teeth. When I took it, my lips brushed his fingers, and he inhaled shallowly.

  There it was—that crackling electricity in the air again. Something between us that I couldn’t name or put my finger on. A connection that seemed to break through the icy wall he kept in front of him.

  He pulled back and wiped his fingers on his shirt absentmindedly. It was something he was staying away from, I understood just then. I didn’t know why. But I knew that of all the guards in here, he was different.

  Was I going crazy? I’d heard about women who fell in love with their kidnappers, but I’d never thought that anything so ridiculous would happen to me. It wasn’t that he had brought me here, though. That wasn’t why my body ached every time he so much as grazed me with his palm. It was something else, something deeper. A secret that I could sense beneath his surface. A secret that he didn’t want me to get at.

  “You still have blood on your lip,” he said.

  I tilted my head up and spoke with a hint of sarcasm.

  “Untie me and I’ll wipe it off.”

  Instead, Vale grabbed my chin and kissed me. His lips took my bottom lip and sucked. He sucked soft at first, then hard, sucked at the cut El Alfa’s henchman had made. Pain sparked through my body, pain and desire both.

  And for a moment, a horrible, horrible moment, I couldn’t stop myself from kissing him back.

  I pushed forward on my tiptoes to deepen the kiss, and he pushed back, conquering me with his mouth. He licked my bottom lip, sucked at it, until I could taste the coppery blood. I moaned, and my body arched into him, stopping only when the chains at my wrists tightened and held me back.

  Vale looked down at me in wonder. The electrical energy between us seemed to brighten the room, even as my shadow passed over his body.

  “Jessica,” he whispered.

  I closed my eyes. I would not give him the satisfaction of letting him see what he had done to me. It was crazy, this blistering attraction. But nobody could blame me for going crazy. Was I crazy?

  His hand slid between my legs, stroking me, and despite myself I turned wet as soon as he touched me. I was crazy. I was. This was all insane.

  “Vale—” I started to say. I was choking on the air in this stone cell.

  “Don’t lie to me, Jessica,” he whispered. “Do you want it?”

  “Vale, please—” My words fluttered out over my tongue, but I didn’t know what to say. I wanted him, yes, I was crazy and I wanted him and my world was crumbling down all around me because of it.

  “You want me. I know you want me.”

  “No.”

  Had I said the word, or had it died on my tongue? His hand burned the place between my thighs, coiling me tighter with every slow stroke.

  “Tell me you want me to fuck you.”

  His voice was a growl that sent shudders down my body. I couldn’t do this. Even though every dream of mine had been about this—or something like this—it wasn’t right. There was something that kept us apart, and I couldn’t bring myself to let go completely. I wasn’t this girl. Jessica was a good girl.

  “No,” I said weakly. “Please—”

  “You’re so fucking hot for me. Look at you, your perfect tight hot cunt. You’re so wet—”

  My breath was hot in my throat, and every part of me tensed as his fingers stroked me. His body was strong, but as much as I wanted him to possess me, I knew that I couldn’t do this. Not really.

  “Please… please…oh!!”

  He flicked my clit, and I was there already, the coil inside me wound so tight that all it would take was a little more.

  “I’ll make it good for you,” he said. “Christ, I’ll make you come hard all over my cock, I swear it.”

  The worst thing was that I wanted it. I was scared, terrified, but I wanted it so bad.

  “Tell me how you like it. Tell me how you want me to fuck you.”

  “No,” I said, dizziness overtaking my brain. “I don’t—”

  “Tell me,” he said. He whispered. He growled. “Tell me.”

  “Tell you?”

  My voice was a breath that was so light, it floated away. His hands were the only things keeping me anchored to the ground.

  “Tell me how you like being fucked.”

  I bit my lip, shook my head. Even now, I couldn’t lie to him. How could I answer that? I didn’t know how I liked being fucked. I’d never been fucked. In that instant, I wanted to be fucked, though. It would be a lie if I denied it. I wanted him to fuck me so badly.

  “I don’t—I don’t—”

  “Tell me.”

  I said the only thing I could say.

  “I’m a virgin.”

  Vale yanked back like he had touched a hot flame, ripping his hands away from me. Immediately the need inside my core flamed up. But the ache in my body from being left untouched wasn’t nearly as terrifying as the look he gave me. He stared at me so coldly that it seemed all of the heat in the air disappeared. It was like he was going to rip my head off right then and there.

  “Vale?” My voice was hoarse. I knew that there was more to him, a secret that I hadn’t quite been able to catch. Now, though, he pulled back from me and I felt alone, completely alone. And terrified. The walls of the room seemed to close in on me. What had I done?

  “Vale?”

  He didn’t say anything, only giving me that terrible, conflicted look. Then he turned and left, slamming the door behind him.

  “Vale!”

  Fear choked my throat. I immediately regretted telling him that I’d never been with a man before. Stories of virgins poured into my mind unbidden.

  Virgin sacrifices. Virgin blood. Stories of terrible men who pay top price to torture and fuck virgins.

  God, I shouldn’t have told him. He’d come back with that awful man, El Alfa, and do terrible things. They would sell me to the highest bidder, to a man who wanted to take a girl’s virginity. Jesus, what would they do to me?

  I breathed shallowly, panting for oxygen. The collar around my throat seemed unbearably tight. And I couldn’t turn around. I couldn’t go anywhere. Blood rushed in my ears and dizziness began to overtake me.

  I’d only ever fainted once before, when I was a kid and overheated on the playground. But the panic that rose up inside of me was enough to make it happen again. Black spots shimmered in my vision and I gasped for breath.

  As I blacked out, I saw the shadow from the moon behind me. It was a cold, cold blue shadow, colder even than Vale’s eyes, and I could only whisper April’s name as I fell into the shadow.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Vale

  I’d thought she—fuck, I’d thought she wanted me. I’d thought that there was something between us, but of course there wasn’t. There couldn’t be. I had kidnapped her.

  Now I couldn’t get her face out of my mind. That face she’d made when I asked her how she wanted me to fuck her. I’d made the biggest mistake.

  “Please, no,” she’d said, and I hadn’t believed it, but I sure as hell believed it now. What had I done? What had I become?

  Ten’s voice rang through my head—”You’ll be doing his dirty work.”

  Nothing was as dirty as my own dark thoughts. A virgin, and I wanted to fuck her, for Chrissakes, and she was a virgin and I had chosen to throw her into this hellhole. No matter what El Alfa had told me to do, there was no way that this was going to be a part of training. I couldn’t do it.

  I’d thought she wanted me, I thought I’d seen that in her face, and then it was gone and I was just a monster again.

  No. No. I couldn’t do this—I just couldn’t.

  I leaned over the toilet in my bathroom and retched. Nothing came up but air, but I retched again and again, thinking about what I’d almost done to someone who was completely innocent.

  “You alright?”

  My head snapped up. David leaned
against the doorframe. El Alfa’s head honcho. The man responsible for Jessica’s cut lip. I’d tasted blood when I kissed her, but now I tasted blood again. I couldn’t wait for the chance to kill El Alfa, and I hoped to whatever God existed that I had the chance to kill David when that time came.

  “Why are you in my room?” I asked, standing up and letting my body draw itself up into its full height. I was a head taller than this asshole, but he was a whole lot meaner. He scowled.

  “I heard you in here and thought I’d make sure you were okay.”

  Sure you did.

  “I’m fine.”

  “You were vomiting.” He picked at his chin, where his sunburn was peeling right under his jawline.

  “Must have been something I ate for dinner,” I said nonchalantly. I rinsed my hands in the sink and splashed water on my face. Still he stood in the doorway, watching me with that ugly look on his face. Dark eyebrows that ripped across his forehead. A mean look, like a dog who couldn’t wait to bite.

  “Can I help you with anything?” I asked, turning around and crossing my arms. He might have been head guard to El Alfa, but I was here now, and he wasn’t going to bully me around. I wasn’t going to let him.

  “Yeah, maybe,” he said, smiling sickly.

  “What?”

  “How’s training going?”

  I thought of Jessica’s split lip, and how she had recoiled from my touch when I’d asked her if she wanted me to fuck her. Was I any better than this asshole? Maybe not. But I sure as hell was going to try to keep her from harm.

  “Fine,” I said coldly.

  “If you ever get sick of training that girl, you just let me know.”

  He leered at me, and something inside me broke. Despite myself, I couldn’t hold back the barb.

  “Yeah?” I said. “Does El Alfa let his dog train bitches?”

  Maybe I wasn’t in control of myself, but damn, it felt good.

  Red with anger, David jumped forward at me. He lifted his arm with a punch that was telegraphed so far ahead, it was nothing for me to catch him by the wrist.

  I slammed him into the bathroom wall, holding him up just high enough that he was forced to stand on tiptoe. My arm braced against his neck, threatening the chokehold I could easily put him into.

  “Let me go!” he hissed.

  “Sure,” I said. “As soon as you apologize for trying to hit me.”

  “I wasn’t—wasn’t gonna hit you—I’m not…”

  He squirmed, but that was as much apology as I was likely to get from him. I let him down, shoving him towards the doorway. He caught himself on the doorframe and craned his head back at me when he was just out of arm’s reach.

  “You’re fucking with the wrong guy,” he said.

  David stormed off and I slumped back against the sink. This wasn’t working. I had to kill El Alfa. I had to kill him soon. But the raid wouldn’t be for another week.

  That was a week I had to spend training Jessica. A week I had to spend sparring with David. A week to keep my secret hidden from El Alfa.

  Back at home, it had seemed doable. Easy, even. Now, though, I was wondering if I would survive until then.

  I woke up in the morning half hungover. I’d drunk half the bottle of whiskey I’d found in the bar cabinet in my room. The sun was blinding.

  After a quick shower, I went down to the cells with a bottle of water and the plate of breakfast that the servants had left for me. Jessica would need it. She hadn’t been able to eat much the last time I’d seen her, but she would waste away to nothing if I didn’t encourage her to eat when she could.

  I would be gentle, I thought to myself. I would hold back. No training today, nothing at all. I would let her have a little bit of peace.

  But when I got down there, David was standing outside of Jessica’s cell. Of all people, this guy.

  “I told you to leave her alone—” I started to say.

  “El Alfa is inside now,” David said, grinning at me. “He’s trying her out.”

  My heart sank as I heard Jessica inside, crying. I put my hand on the door handle, but David leaned his palm against the door, blocking my way. It took every ounce of self-control not to shove him up against the wall again.

  “El Alfa doesn’t want to be disturbed when he’s visiting with the girls,” David said, his evil leer glowing at me in the dim hallway. “But don’t worry. He won’t leave any permanent damage.”

  There was nothing I could do but wait. I heard Jessica’s muffled cries, and anger swirled up in my body. The darkness swirled up too, unbidden, and it immediately started looking for ways to kill. I could do it now, I thought. It was early, but I could do it. Sure, there were guards at either end of the hall, but if I could overpower David—

  The door opened before I could act.

  El Alfa stepped out, zipping up his pants. Inside, I saw a glimpse of Jessica, her head bent, sobbing. My body wrenched at the sight, but I controlled it. Control. I had to keep in control.

  El Alfa winked at me as he came out into the hallway.

  “Train her to suck dick,” he said. “She is terrible.”

  I found that my fists were clenched at my side. But David had a gun, and I’d stupidly come downstairs with nothing, not even the knife from my breakfast plate. Still, the thought echoed through my mind:

  Kill him. Kill him. Kill him.

  “Hello? You understand, American boy?”

  “Yes,” I said, controlling the rage in my voice. “I understand. I’ll train her.”

  “Train her today. Make her good. I’ll be back later to check.”

  Kill him. Kill him. Kill him.

  But El Alfa was already walking down the hall. David was at his side, his hand on his gun as he looked back over his shoulder at me. I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t do a single goddamn thing except for what he had ordered me to do.

  First Ten, and now El Alfa. I was made to follow orders, but this was the first time I considered breaking them. Jessica was still crying when I came into the cell with a plate of breakfast that I knew she wouldn’t be able to eat.

  I had to do this. So did she.

  And after today, I don’t know if she would hate me more than I already hated myself.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Jessica

  I was crying when Vale came into my cell. I jerked back as his hand touched my shoulder.

  There was vomit on my chin, a little bit of it. El Alfa had gagged me with his ugly cock. I didn’t know what to do, and it had been too much. He’d slapped me, and my cheek still ached from the slap. My jaw ached from where he had forced it open. And the rest—I didn’t want to remember it. I couldn’t.

  Vale had a soft look on his face. I didn’t know why—I had heard what El Alfa had told him. But he leaned forward with a plate of food.

  “Can you eat?” he asked. I shook my head, tears burning my eyes. My stomach was roiling, and even the thought of putting something in my mouth made me gag a little.

  He put the plate down and turned to me. His shoulders squared back like a soldier’s.

  “We’re starting new training today,” Vale said. “You understand?”

  The fear inside me burst out in a flurry of words and tears alternating with each other.

  “Please,” I said. “I—I can’t. I can’t do it. I tried. I tried so hard, but I couldn’t do it—”

  I fell into sobs, trying to hold them back and failing. El Alfa had hit me for crying. I didn’t want to be hit again.

  “It’s alright. I’ll teach you.”

  He closed the door behind him and locked it. Fear seeped in through my body. Not again. Not again.

  “Please, no—”

  Not again.

  “You have to learn,” he said firmly. “Did he hurt you?”

  I nodded silently.

  “Then he’ll hurt you again. He’ll kill you. Unless you learn.”

  “I don’t think I can.” The tears were hot on my cheeks. But Vale didn’t look
like he was going to hit me, thank God.

  “I think you can.”

  “No—”

  “We’ll go slowly.”

  I bit back a sob. This wasn’t happening to me. It couldn’t be. I felt two strong hands on my shoulders and looked up into Vale’s ice-blue eyes. Strangely enough, they had softened again. He was letting the mask slip, or pretending to. He almost seemed compassionate.

  “This won’t be easy, Jessica,” he said. “But you’re brave. You can do this. I won’t hurt you.”

  I didn’t believe him, although I yearned to. My whole body shook in terror. Then he stepped back and his hands were gone.

  I looked up. He was unbuttoning his shirt. My heart began to pound. Why was he getting undressed?

  I watched mutely as he pulled his shirt off, my breath drawn away from me by the awful sight. There was a huge scar that ran down his chest from his collarbone all the way down to his stomach. It ended just above the bellybutton.

  Tiny scars, too, scars that crisscrossed his biceps and covered his sculpted pecs. Puckers of white flesh.

  Vale paused for a moment before taking off his pants. More of them, white lines and seams like he’d let someone draw all over him. He stood there, with only his black briefs covering him. His scars gleamed in the morning light.

  I couldn’t help but stare, aghast at the scars. How deep they were, how many of them they were.

  “What happened to you?” I asked.

  He smiled wryly at me.

  “I got my appendix out.”

  I shook my head.

  “Really, what happened? You have—God, you have so many of them.”

  “Are you asking so that you don’t have to train?”

  I clamped my lips shut and turned my head away. Training. Right. That was why he had come down here. Panic began to rise in my throat again.

  “It’s alright,” he said, and although it wasn’t alright, it was really fucking far from alright, I started to panic a little less. “I’ll tell you, then we can start. I know this is hard for you.”