“Are you threatening me?” I asked, disbelievingly.
“It’s just a friendly warning, that’s all,” Fringapellumna told me, insincerely. “Now, if you don’t mind, I have things to do. And, in the future, this area is off limits to mere civilians.” He almost spat out the last word as if it left a vile taste in his mouth. Thorn urgently pulled me away before I could vocalise the responses that were bubbling in my brain.
“Did you hear that bloated bureaucrat?” I angrily questioned once we were out of earshot. “What a pompous jackass! And he’s in charge of this investigation? How could you let this happen?”
“I had nothing to do it,” Thorn advised me, in a sensible tone. “Fringapellumna is our Chief Security Officer and there’s nothing I can do about it. He’s running the show and that’s all there is to it.” She gave me a concerned look. “Be careful what you say and do around him, Stephen. His authority is absolute and he doesn’t like being contradicted. Take my advice, and stay out of his way. It’ll be safer for you.”
“So, you’re going to let this ……. this fat, overpaid, underqualified idiot with the brains of a turtle, run things, are you? Thorn, I’m astonished at your attitude. It doesn’t sound like you at all.”
Thorn surprised me by winking. “There’s more than one way to catch a jumbuccamut,” she murmured, grinning. “Let Fringapellumna do things his way and think he’s in charge. It keeps him out of mischief. In the meantime, we’ll be doing a bit of our own investigating.”
“You cunning little weasel,” I said, admiringly. “I should have known. What’s a ‘jumbuccamut’?”
Thorn, as usual, hadn’t listened to my question and had heard only what she wanted to hear. “Did I just hear you call me a ‘weasel’?” she demanded indignantly, her eyes practically shooting sparks in my direction.
“I meant it as a compliment,” I hastily reassured her. “I just wanted to tell you that you were being very clever.”
“Well, next time pick your compliments a little more carefully,” she growled.
“I will,” I fervently promised. “Anyway, about this jumbo …… jambu …… jimbacar …. um, thing …..?”
“Oh, it’s a small, wild bird that lives underground with us,” she informed me. “They’re hard to catch but they make good pets. Let’s go and visit the Elders. I’m sure they’ll want to see you.”
Chapter 7
There were seven Elders, all looking a little older than the normal Ones I’d seen so far. Hopefully, they’d been chosen for their life experience and not simply because of their grey hairs. They greeted me solemnly and calmly. I quickly gave up trying to remember their names.
“So, Arugohumna,” one of them asked, “how are you doing with the investigation? Are you making any progress?”
“Be fair, Elder,” Thorn argued. “I’ve only just started.”
The Elder smiled faintly. “A good point,” he conceded. “Very well, have you talked to Fringapellumna?”
“We did,” Thorn confirmed. She hesitated. “He seems to blame the borgulessa.”
“And you don’t?” another Elder asked, shrewdly.
“I’m not sure,” Thorn replied. “Stephen, here, has some reservations about that theory.”
“You do?” I was asked. “Why do you object to Fringapellumna’s conclusions?”
“First of all, do you mind if I shorten his name to ‘Fink’?” I asked. “All of your names are bit of a handful for me.”
“‘Fink’ it is, then,” one of the Elders agreed. I could see slight smiles on most of their faces from which I concluded that they were well aware of the human meaning of the abbreviation. This also told me that their Security Officer wasn’t held in particularly high esteem.
“Well, first of all,” I began, “Fink seems hell bent on blaming the goblins and a preconceived notion like that always blinds you to other possibilities. Now, I don’t know enough about the situation here to apportion blame to anyone, but the justification for Fink’s conclusion is the presence of a belt which could have been left there by anyone. As a clue, it’s a bit too obvious. I mean, really! It’s far too simple a solution. Unless, of course, we were meant to think that ……. hmmm. We don’t really have a lot to go on, do we?”
“And that’s why we need your help,” one of the Elders informed me. “Because of your different perspective, you can see things that elude us. We’re a peaceful and trusting race and find it difficult to suspect anyone.”
“In other words, because I’m a human,” I wryly observed, “you think I’ll be used to treachery and suspicion. No, don’t bother,” I announced, as several Elders opened their mouths to protest, “because you’re right. The human race isn’t peaceful or trusting. I accept that as a truth, but I do want to help. I’ll do my best, I assure you.”
“Thank you,” I was told.
Thorn and I went outside and began walking down the street. “Who do you think stole the Crystals?” I asked. “You must suspect someone by now.”
“Well, the borgulessa are the main suspects,” Thorn said, slowly. “They’re sneaky, underhanded and treacherous. Perhaps Fringapellumna is right and this is a prelude to declaring war on us. After all, if our energy supplies are drastically diminished, we’d be much easier targets.”
“But you have some doubts?” I remarked. “Fink doesn’t seem to have any.”
Thorn made a rude noise. “Fringapellumna’s main aim in life is to destroy the borgulessa. He makes no secret of it. They killed his parents, you see, and he’s sworn vengeance ever since. He wants a war, and there’s very little he won’t do to bring it about. Frankly, he frightens me. He may be a buffoon, but his determination is scary.”
“But what about you?” I persisted. “What do you think?”
“Well, despite my borgulessa prejudice,” she answered thoughtfully, “I really can’t believe that one of them could simply wander in, steal the Crystals and make his way out of the settlement without being seen. It defies logic. But there was the belt. That’s pretty damning.”
“Oh yes, the famous belt,” I sarcastically commented. “How absent-minded of them to leave such a vital clue behind. If they were clever enough to become invisible and steal the settlement’s most treasured possession, why did they suddenly become so brainless as to leave behind the one piece of evidence that would condemn them? Very Jekyll and Hyde, don’t you think?”
“Jekyll and Hyde?” Thorn questioned, wrinkling her brow.
“It’s a human story,” I explained, “about a man who switches personalities from good to evil. But in the goblin’s case, it’d be switching from clever to stupid. It’s possible, but not very probable.”
“If that’s so,” Thorn interjected with some asperity, “who did do it?”
“How the devil should I know?” I answered. “I don’t know enough about anything at this stage, but there’s this old police axiom: ‘Where’s the profit?’ We should be asking ourselves that.”
“What do you mean?” Thorn demanded.
“Well,” I pointed out, “who’s making money out of this? For instance, I remember you saying that you’re using other crystals for temporary power. Does anybody sell those? Do you even use money, by the way?”
“Of course we do,” she snorted derisively. “We were using money before you humans were. In fact, I think you stole the idea from us!” So saying, she put a hand in her pocket and pulled out a handful of small golden coins for my inspection.
“Nice,” I commented. “Are they made of real gold?”
“Naturally,” she informed me, returning the coins to her pocket. “They can’t be used otherwise.” She looked at me intently. “Are you saying that the crystal sellers are the Crystal thieves?”
“That’s just an example,” I continued. “There are other considerations as well. For instance, who would benefit from a war? Do you have weapon dealers here? In my world, they become obscenely rich from any conflict.”
“People feed on the misery a
nd death of others for mere profit?” Thorn gasped, horrified. “Even for humans, I find that sickening.”
“So do I,” I agreed, grimly.
“Well, at least we agree on something,” Thorn observed, “but I can’t see a One doing what you’re suggesting. It’s just too …….. no, it’s out of the question! No One would do that! It’s impossible!”
“Nothing is impossible when it comes to money,” I philosophised. “It’s the biggest corruptive influence there is.”
“So you say,” Thorn commented, stiffly. “I still don’t believe it, but you’re right. We can’t rule out anything.”
“So, what now?” I asked.
“I suppose we should visit the crystal sellers,” she answered. “We’ll see what they have to say about all of this. But I still think it’s the borgulessa.”
“We’ll see,” I stated.
Chapter 8
Thorn led me along a series of winding streets, with my awe growing at every step. The architecture was truly extraordinary. Every structure seemed beautiful and graceful, flashing colors like butterflies, and so intricately delicate. Any human architect would break down and weep at the very sight and be forever haunted by his inability to match this perfection. The flowing outlines of the buildings blended and separated in eye-catching harmonies, complementing each other stunningly. And the residents simply strolled along, totally unconcerned about the beauty surrounding them. Amazing.
We ended up in a section of a backstreet and Thorn glanced at me, hand on door. “What do you expect to find?” she asked.
“I don’t really expect to find anything,” I replied. “I simply want to check out the possibility, that’s all. If anyone is involved, I don’t think they’d be very likely to jump up and yell: ‘Yes, I did it!’ We have to investigate every lead if we’re going to catch the perpetrator.”
“I think this is just a huge waste of time,” Thorn grumbled, pushing open the door.
“Have you anything better to do?” I mocked.
“You know I don’t,” Thorn told me, defeated. “I only hope your suspicious human mind can come up with something useful. Those temporary crystals we’re using won’t last all that much longer.”
“You’ll just have to buy some more then,” I informed her, trailing her into the shop and looking around with interest. “Are the temporary crystals costly?”
“They don’t come cheaply, I know that much,” Thorn answered.
“Ah, it’s Arugohumna, isn’t it?” said a voice from behind a counter. “How nice to see you. And how’s the lovely Traculimna?”
“She’s fine,” came the cold reply. “My friend here would like to ask you a few questions.”
“Oh, does he want to buy some crystals?”
“No, I don’t,” I answered. “Sorry to disappoint you. Has business been good recently?”
“Yes, indeed,” the shop owner declared in gratified tones, avariciously rubbing his palms together. “Everybody has been buying crystals since the theft. In fact, I’ve nearly sold out. I don’t know what’s going to happen after that because I’ve been told that the supply of crystals is almost exhausted. What’ll we do then? We’ll have no power at all and, worst of all,” the shop owner’s voice took on a tragic veneer, “I’ll have to close my shop!”
“Tragic,” I murmured, insincerely.
“And the theft!” he went on. “Who would dare such a thing? It’s an outrage!”
I turned to Thorn and said, “I don’t think we really need to stay here any longer. Is there another crystal seller nearby?”
“There’s three more,” she replied.
“Very good,” I said. “Let’s visit them all.” I turned back to the shop owner. “We should find the stolen Crystals any day now. Thank you for your co-operation.”
“My pleasure,” he replied.
Thorn began quizzing me as soon as we were out the door. “What was the point of all those questions?” she wanted to know. “Did you learn anything?”
“I’m not sure,” I replied slowly. “He seemed genuinely distressed about the theft. As far as I could tell, he was a typical storeowner.”
“What did you mean by saying that we would recover the Crystals any day now?” Thorn enquired in a puzzled voice. “As far as I can see, we’re not getting anywhere.”
“That was just something I threw in to stir the pot,” I negligently replied. “If he was involved with the theft, it should have made him nervous, but he didn’t twitch a hair. So, who’s next?”
“It’s just up ahead,” Thorn reassured me.
“We’ll go through the same routine,” I told her, “and see what happens. You never know, if we shake hard enough, something might fall out.”
Thorn glanced at me curiously. “You certainly have a strange way of putting things,” she noted. “It’ll take me awhile to get used to it. You humans are a very odd race.”
I shrugged. “We’re not so different to you,” I commented. “We both have loves and hates, likes and dislikes. I think you’ll find we’re closer than you think.”
“No, we’re not!” Thorn strongly objected. “The One are nothing like humans! Okay, we may look a little alike, but that’s it! We have no common grounds!”
“Is that so,” I smirked. “So, do you love your sister?”
“Of course I do,” Thorn replied, indignantly. “She’s my sister!”
“Humans care for family members as well,” I informed her. “That’s one point in common. And that shopkeeper back there was practically drooling at the thought of his sales. I’d say that greed is a second common factor. Agreed?”
“I suppose,” Thorn reluctantly conceded.
“And you and your sister were yelling at each other not so long ago,” I reminded her, “so I’d say that anger is the third consensus.”
“That wasn’t anger,” Thorn defensively spluttered. “It was ……… a …… a small disagreement, that’s all.”
“Yeah, yeah,” I leered knowingly. “A small disagreement? It looked more like an invitation to open war, if you ask me. Face it, Thorn, you’re more human that you care to admit.”
She shot me a malevolent glance and silently sulked for the remaining time it took to reach the second shop.
Chapter 9
I repeated the exact same questions to the next shopkeeper and received basically the same responses as I had at the first shop. The third shop fetched a similar result, but the fourth shop, well, ……. ! First of all, the owner became decidedly nervous with my questions. He fidgeted and shifted his feet as I interrogated him. Not overtly, mind you, but just enough to draw attention to himself, if say, someone happened to be searching for an unusual response. I glance briefly across at Thorn, but apparently she hadn’t noticed anything incriminating because she gawked back blankly at me. When I came to the part about the imminent finding of the crystals, the owner jumped a little but then relaxed and smiled knowingly.
“Thank you for your time,” I ended, and walked outside.
“Well, that’s the lot, then,” Thorn informed me. “What a time waster!”
I stared at her in amazement. “Are you kidding me?” I exclaimed. “Didn’t you see anything out of the ordinary?”
“No,” she admitted, puzzled. “What should I have seen?”
“Well, I don’t mean to cast aspersions,” I began, “but that crystal seller was obviously hiding something.”
“He was?” Thorn asked. “What?”
“Didn’t you see how upset he became when I first talked about recovering the Crystals?” I lectured her. “Then he smiled to himself because he knew full well that we couldn’t, and that was because he knew full well they weren’t in the settlement any longer. He might not have stolen them himself, but as sure as wombats dig tunnels, he had a hand in it.”
“You saw all of that?” Thorn cried, astonished. “I don’t believe you for a second. You’re making it up. You have to be! A One would never do such a thing. It defies the imagin
ation.”
“Despite everything, Thorn,” I remarked, putting a finger alongside my cheek and tilting my head at her, “you’re such an innocent. You may be tough and rough on the outside but you’re still a trusting young girl inside. We’ve already established that the One possess greed and anger, so is it such a leap of the imagination to add theft to that list? Forget your goblin prejudices and apply that same suspicion to your own people.”
Poor Thorn. I felt so sorry for her as she sifted through my words and ended up colliding with the walls of her preconceived notions. I felt a little guilty, also. I may have permanently damaged her ideals and darkened her soul a smidgen with my accusations. From her shocked face and open mouth, I could picture her struggle with the notion of her race’s cupidity. I could foresee this ending up in one of two ways: either she would glumly accept what I’s said, or she would lash out in unthinking anger. Unfortunately, she chose the latter and, before I could even blink, she punched me in the face.
I felt the blow, and also felt myself falling, but I retained enough sense to twist sideways so as not to dent the sidewalk with my head. With blurred vision, I looked up to find Thorn standing astride me, her fists clenched and her face contorted with fury.
“The One do not steal!” she screamed at me. My mind might have been whirling and unfocused, but an irrelevant section of it noticed that, even with rage almost palpably steaming from her pores, Thorn looked remarkably pretty.
‘This isn’t the time for that sort of nonsense.’ I mentally snorted.
- What do you mean? A pretty girl is a pretty girl at any time. Live for the moment.
‘I’ll be lucky to survive this moment. She looks like she wants to kill me!’
- Then you’ll die a happy man. She’s gorgeous, isn’t she?
‘Maybe. It’s a bit hard to tell from my present angle. Lying flat on the ground after being hit in the head isn’t conducive to rational objectivity.’
- Moan, moan! Just look at the incredible figure, those enormous flashing eyes and those cute pointed ears. Have you ever seen anything so exotic?
Crystal Thief (1) (The Underground Kingdom) Page 4