Accidental Love (Accidental Crush #2)

by Adrienne Torrisi

  Beth might be the prettiest girl I've ever seen. She is a beautiful marriage of ethnicities; her dad is from the Philippians and her mom is Irish, I think. She has the silkiest, straightest black hair and light hazel eyes. She is truly stunning.

  My heart drops for Shane when I see her. I know it can't be easy. They are two of the only people on earth who truly know how the other one feels. They both loved Roger with their whole hearts, differently yet the same.

  "Hey, Shane. You sounded really great out there." As she wraps her arms around him, my heart sinks deeper for him.

  "Beth, thanks." He hugs her back. I know he hasn't seen her since last summer. She's back from college because she was Prom Queen last year and it's tradition for last year's Prom Queen to pass her crown on to this year's. I totally forgot, and by the look on his face, so did Shane.

  After everyone greets Beth with hugs and small talk, the crowd starts to head back to the main ballroom. Todd mouths 'I'll meet you out there.' That's the other thing that is absolutely incredible about him; he knows and understands my friendship with Shane. He's never jealous or insecure, and he can sense when Shane really needs me. I see Johnny give Shane a look as RTS locks her fingers with his and pulls him back out toward the ballroom. I'm not sure if he knows who Beth is, but he gives me a smile that says he's glad I'm with Shane.

  "Shane, can I talk to you for sec?" Beth asks. This has got to be just as painful for her as it is for Shane.

  I start to leave, sensing this needs to be a private conversation, but Shane grabs my hand and pulls me back. The smile on his face is saying please stay; therefore I do. Beth catches on quickly. She can tell this conversation won't happen unless it's the three of us. When she gestures toward a few steps, we all go sit down.

  "How are you?" she asks, pain filling her eyes. I feel bad being here for this conversation, but Shane squeezes my hand tightly, as if to respond to my internal thoughts. I know he needs me, so I'm not going anywhere.

  "I'm okay." He stares down at the floor, still squeezing my hand insanely tight. "How about you?"

  Beth lets out a long breath, as though she's contemplating saying something. She looks down at the same wood grain floor Shane's eyes are fixated on. "Not good, actually." She presses her lips together for a while, like she's trying to compose herself. "It's just been really hard, you know. I miss him."

  I didn't think Shane could squeeze my hand any tighter, yet he does. "I know. I miss him, too. It's been rough with my parents."

  Her eyes glance over to meet his. "I know." She places her hand on his knee. "I heard. I'm really sorry."

  Shane shrugs. "It's okay. I mean, it's getting a little better, or at least, I'm getting used to it."

  Beth stares out at the brick wall that separates the stage from the ballroom. "It's really hard being here, seeing everyone, seeing you up there on stage." Her gaze refocuses on Shane. "You look so much like him when you play." Her lips turn up into a smile at the memory.

  "Yeah, I know. It was cool of Todd to ask me to take his place. It makes me feel closer to him in a strange way."

  Beth smiles back. "I get it, Shane. It's hard to be back here for me because it makes me remember. I spend so much time trying to forget, but being here brings it all back. It gets a little easier when you're removed from it, being away at school. I try hard to forget, but I really can't. I loved him so much. We were supposed to be together forever. I was supposed to meet him at college this year, and he'd be playing football and I'd be there in the stands, cheering him on. But I am there and he isn't." Her voice cracks and breaks off as she wipes at the corner of her eyes. Shane's grip hasn't loosened at all, and I can feel him fighting back tears with all of his might.

  "I know you can't get away from it now, but you will. It will get easier." She smiles at Shane. "I know he'd be so proud of you, and the man you're becoming."

  "I'm not so sure." Shane shakes his head. "I can't seem to do anything right in my parents' eyes. I can't live up to any of their expectations because they lost the only son they really cared about."

  "Shane, that's not true," I say so quickly I practically shout it, and Beth smiles at me.

  "She's right." She runs her hand over Shane's back, and then her eyes meet mine. "You're Ryan's little sister, right?"

  "Yeah."

  "Are you guys dating?" she questions, smiling at us both.

  "Us? No," we both say and start to laugh.

  "Just best friends," Shane says, and the way he says it gives Beth clue enough.

  "I thought so." She smiles.

  "You thought what?" Shane asks, his curiosity piqued.

  "It's just, I saw you with that boy before."

  While Shane turns fifty shades of red, I feel the sweat on his hand as he finally loosens it a little. "Um."

  "Shane, it's okay." She places her hand on his knee. "There are some things you should know," she says, smiling. "First, Roger wasn't perfect. In fact, he was in the middle of a big fight with your parents before the accident. We got matching tattoos with each other's initials before he went away to school, and your parents were furious." She pulls back her bangles and there, in small script on the inside of her wrist, are Rogers initials, RMT.

  "Really? Roger got a tattoo? Sweet," he says almost to himself.

  "And you should know that Roger's best friend in the whole world is gay." She gives Shane a knowing smile.

  "Jake is gay?" Shane whispers, cautious for even other people's secrets.

  "Yeah, he is. He came out to Roger his sophomore year of high school, and it never changed the way Roger felt about him. They were best friends. It didn't matter to Roger, and he kept his secret, well, forever." Her demeanor changes at the realization.

  "Wow. I never knew. Jake? I can't believe it. And I'm pretty good with this stuff." Shane grins, realizing what he just said gives him away, but I can tell he's relaxed with Beth. There's an unspoken trust with her.

  "Listen, I just wanted you to know that Roger was an amazing person, but he wasn't perfect. He would be so proud of you and everything you've become and are becoming. Don't worry about your parents; they love you, just as much as they loved him. It's easy to think he's perfect now, just know they disapproved of a ton of things he did." She smiles deeply.

  "Oh, yeah? What else?"

  Beth laughs. "We'll save those for next time." She gives him a sly smile, then her face turns serious again. "I miss him every day, Shane. It's hard to even look at you; you have his eyes." She smiles and gently touches his face.

  "Beth, we're getting ready to announce Prom Queen," one of the kids from Student Council interrupts. I didn't even see him walk over.

  At that, we all get up.

  "Thanks, Beth. I really needed this. I miss him every day, too," he whispers to her as he hugs her.

  "I needed it, too, Shane." She smiles and wipes under her eyes. "Good to see you again." She gives me a quick smile, and then she walks away with the kid from Student Council.

  "Thanks for staying, Ash." Shane gives me a look that melts my heart.

  "Anytime, Shaney, but I think you broke my hand." We both start to laugh.

  ***

  Prom has surpassed all of my dreams and expectations. I'm fully and deeply in love with Todd, and I'm incredibly happy and relieved for Shane. I could almost feel the weight of guilt being lifted from his shoulders as we were talking to Beth.

  We are all making our way into the hotel when I finally have a second to talk to Blythe.

  "How's Brian?" I ask with a tinge of sarcasm, and she gives me a smile I can't quite read. "Blythe!" I lower my voice, "Is there something you need to tell me?" I pull her over to the sofas in the lobby of the hotel, and we plop down on them.

  "No." Her smile deepens. "I'm just having a really good time." Her southern accent slips through.

  "Really?" I question, full of surprise. "A whole new Brian and a whole new Blythe." I'm seeping with sarcasm, although I can't help getting a little excited at the thought of doub
le dating.

  She shrugs. "I don't know. He's different lately, you know?" She kicks the heel of her boot with the tip of the other.

  "Interesting." I can't hide my smirk. "So you're officially over Ryan?” I'm treading lightly. I know she really liked my brother earlier this year, and I don't want to bring up old wounds.

  "Yeah, I think I am." She grins and shakes her head. "The accident changed Brian for the better." As our eyes connect, her smile brightens her entire face, making her glow.

  "So, is there a 'we'?" I ask, throwing her own question back to her.

  "Not yet." She smiles.

  "Here are our beautiful dates." Brian and Todd come up to join us near the couches. "We're all checked in. Let's get this party started!" Brian shouts at the top of his lungs, getting a few glares from passersby’s who aren't too happy prom's post parties are happening here tonight.

  "Taylor, un-attach yourself from Gretchen for a second so we can go up to our room," Brian shouts across the lobby.

  I glance over at Blythe. I know a few months ago seeing Ryan with Gretchen would have bothered her, but tonight, she couldn't care less.

  Everyone starts to make their way to the elevators before we get kicked out of the hotel, but Todd pulls me back. "Ash, can I talk to you for a second?"

  "Sure."

  He looks around to make sure everyone has already cleared the lobby. "I have something for you." He pulls out a key dangling from a red tassel.

  I know this isn't the key to our closet at school; this is a much more special key. This is a key to our very own room. This hotel still has old-school room keys, which is amazing.

  A smile spreads across my lips. "What is that?"

  "Exactly what you think it is." His smile matches mine as he leans down to kiss me. "Blythe, Brian, and Gretch helped a little. Gretch kept Ryan busy so Bri and I could check in and he wouldn't know, and Blythe kept you busy." He smiles his crooked smile that tells me I'm in big trouble.

  Todd opens the door to our own room, which thankfully is on a different floor from everyone else. My eyes instantly lock on a vase filled with red roses and a bottle of bleach sitting on the dresser.

  "I figured out the bleach comment." He smiles. "And I wanted you to feel at home."

  I can't help laughing. "Well, it worked." I step up on my tiptoes to kiss him.

  He's already unzipping my dress. We both can't undress each other fast enough as we fall onto the bed. There is entirely too much pent-up passion exploding inside me. I didn't realize how badly I wanted this.

  While his fingers explore my body, I can't contain my excitement. He traces my hip bone gently, then his finger slowly makes its way up to my jawline, stopping to caress each place it passes. He's wearing a wicked smile, enjoying teasing me just as much as I'm enjoying the teasing.

  As we explore one another in new and exciting ways, I can't help laughing as his sweaty skin touches mine in places it's never touched before. I am completely naked physically and emotionally. I feel exposed, but in all the best ways. There is nothing to hide.

  Then he quickly slides on protection. Well, I’ve never seen a boy do this, but it looks like he does it in record time. I have no idea what I'm doing, but Todd takes it slow. He is gentle and wonderful as he guides me through everything. Each time we go a little farther, he stops to make sure I'm okay.

  It hurts more than I ever thought and Todd senses it. "Do you want to stop?" he whispers, his lips gently brushing my ear.

  As always, I feel safe and secure with him. However, this is almost to another level. My body is pressed into his without the usual barrier of clothing. It's my skin against his, and it feels incredible to be this close.

  "No," I whisper. "Keep going."

  Our hearts are pounding as we lie on top of one another. He takes it slow and the hurt slowly changes to exhilaration. We are both here in the moment, a moment I will never forget. His fingers entwine with mine, squeezing my hand tightly. I squeeze his hand back just as tight as we become one.

  "Are you okay?" he whispers, and I nod my head yes.

  I don't think I can actually form a sentence yet. I'm feeling so many things I've never felt before. I've never been this close to another person, physically or emotionally. I always thought I already gave my whole heart to Todd, but I realize now that I hadn't really, not until right now.

  "I love you, Ashley." He kisses my forehead with his soft lips.

  I look up at him and our eyes lock, our souls lock.

  "I love you, too." I'm still breathless and sweaty, yet happier than I've ever been before. "Thank you for planning this and for tonight."

  "I love you like crazy, Ash." He leans down and kisses me, and I feel just how deep our connection is as it is poured into this kiss.

  Chapter 12: The Pool

  Summer is finally here. Todd and I are closer than ever. Funny enough, so are Shane and Johnny. Ever since the talk with Beth, Shane has been more openly affectionate. I mean, they aren't "out" or anything, but he's a lot less cautious.

  The sun is beating down on all of us as we sit by the glistening pool, listening to our head lifeguard, George, give a pretty boring pep talk. George is an amazing lifeguard, but he's not the best public speaker. He's in his early twenties and has been working at the pool for as long as I can remember.

  We're at the annual summer kick-off meeting before they open the pool to the public. It's exciting because this is the first time we get to meet the other lifeguards and see who we'll be stuck with for the summer.

  Todd, Brian, and Ryan all have different football camps starting next month, so they couldn't work at their usual country club. But since they are basically like celebrities in our town, the town club is letting them work until they go away. I'm super excited because that means Todd will be working with me as a lifeguard, but unfortunately, so will Ryan. I'm pretty sure he has no idea what happened on prom night, and I hope it stays that way forever.

  In walks a tall boy I've never seen at the pool before. He's definitely got a swimmer's build; I can spot that from a mile away. Broad shoulders, chiseled chest, muscular legs. Summer is looking up. At least I'll have something pretty to look at while Todd is away.

  "Hey Ry, Todd, Brian." He gives them all a head nod. Of course, he knows my brother and the guys.

  "Casey, what's up," they all say simultaneously.

  I feel Todd stiffen next to me, which is strange because Todd pretty much gets along with everyone. I see him give Brian a look, and they both roll their eyes. However, Casey is in the middle of talking to Ry, so they are both oblivious to the exchange.

  I can tell Todd is tense, although he's putting up his usual I-don't-have-a-care-in-the-world wall. I'm instantly determined to find out more about Casey and why Todd is reacting this way.

  The opportunity comes when I'm finally alone with Ryan on our drive home. My fingers are nervously running across the black leather seat of his classic red Mustang as I work up the courage to nonchalantly ask him about Casey. I need to play this like it's no big deal, or I know I won't get anywhere.

  "So what's up with Casey?"

  "What do you mean?" Ryan glances over at me, then his eyes quickly refocus on the road.

  "I mean, who is he? How do you guys know him?"

  "He's cool. He's on the Ridgewood baseball team."

  "Oh, is that how you guys all know him?"

  "Yeah, from sports when we were kids, and Todd—" He stops himself. Here it is, this is what I've wanted to know, but this pause is making my heart start to beat faster.

  "Todd what?"

  He glances back over at me. "Nothing. It's no big deal, Ash."

  "Todd what, Ryan?" I say, enunciating each word as I lower the music.

  He takes a deep breath, like he's being forced to say something, which I guess technically he is. "Todd dated his sister last summer."

  "Oh. That's cool." I try to seem really calm on the outside, yet inside, my heart is racing. It all clicks. That is the girl from l
ast summer. No wonder he reacted that way when Casey walked up.

  "Casey got pretty pissed, so let's just say Todd and him aren't the best of friends."

  "Why?"

  "Well, it is his sister." He glances back over at me. "Not everyone is as cool as me, Ash." He gives me that sarcastic smirk. "Guess Todd has a thing for sisters." He laughs, finding himself hysterical.

  I smack him as hard as I can in the arm. "Shut up, Ryan."

  "Hey, watch it. I'm driving here."

  My hit unfortunately didn't wipe the smile off his face. I so desperately want to know more about Casey, Todd, and this girl, but I know I need to tread lightly, or Ryan will tell Todd I was asking questions. I just want to know why Todd didn't say anything to me.

  ***

  It's our first day working at the pool and my stomach is fluttering with excitement. I love the pool. I love the summer. I love the feeling of my skin soaking in the warm sun. I love being a lifeguard, sitting up in that high chair, overlooking the sparkling water. There is nothing quite like it. Now that I'm fifteen, this is my first summer as a full-fledged lifeguard. I can't wait.

  Unfortunately, Todd and I have been separated. Since we're dating, it could be a potentially hazardous distraction; therefore, Todd gets the baby pool while I get the bigger kids pool. The baby pool is super stressful, so I'm kind of glad I'm not with Todd. The bad news is, I can't even see him from my post, but at least we have lunch breaks together.

  When Todd pulls up in the parking lot at the same time as Ryan and me, my heart instantly flutters to join my stomach at the very sight of his car.

  "Hey, Todd," Ryan shouts over to him as he gets out.

  "Hey, Ry, Ash." He gives me a smile that makes my knees weak. My heart always melts when I see him, but ever since we've been together, it's gotten worse. I can't control it, it's like my body is drawn to his. It doesn't help that he looks incredibly sexy in his red lifeguard board shorts with his light grey lifeguard t-shirt that hints at just how tone he is under it.

  "See you guys in there," Ryan says as he starts walking toward the main building, unable to get out of here fast enough. He's still not use to it, I guess.