Indulge

by Liv Morris

  They all chuckle at me simultaneously, but Dane steps forward. “Yeah, baby, it’s yours. My first ever garage sale purchase. Another first that’s just ours.”

  I nod, understanding the depth of his statement. Sometimes I wish I was all the firsts to him that he is to me, well, one in particular, but there are still so many he chooses to give me. The really special ones that go beyond physical experimentation and creep into your soul and stay there, are just for us. Perfection.

  “I’ll treasure it,” I whisper, walking back into his arms, soaking up his scent. I wish I could bottle it and spritz myself sporadically throughout the day.

  “Okay,” Sawyer pipes up, breaking the mood. “As real as this has been, I gotta go. We done here?”

  “Where you need to be so badly? Would it kill you to spend some time with your friends?” Tate’s voice is menacing, which is completely unlike him, but honestly, we’ve all been worried about Sawyer. “You’re like a ghost lately.”

  “I got shit to do. I don’t keep tabs on you, do I?” See—this is the weird part. Sawyer’s never hateful, he’s just not himself these days.

  “Saw,” I move to him and place a hand on his arm, “we just miss you, that’s all. You’re still moving in, right? This can be your room. We got you a king bed.”

  “Ah, Gidge.” His hardened glare dissolves now and I get a slight smile. “You’re the best. Where’d he find you?” he says where only I can hear it against my hair as he kisses the top of my head. “I’ll be moved in by the time school starts back, okay?”

  “Ok,” I murmur, wishing desperately that he’d talk to me. I love Sawyer dearly, and I’d move mountains or die trying to make sure he’s happy—we all would. I just wish he’d tell us what’s going on. “Are you going to Parker’s wedding with us?”

  “Wouldn’t miss it.” He looks at Dane. “I’ll ride with you guys?”

  “Of course, bud,” Dane affirms with a jerk of his head. “And I worked my ass off on this room for you. Get moved into it.”

  I have no idea when Tate and Bennett crept out, but it’s just the three of us now, and I can tell by tension in the air before I even check their body language—Dane’s going in for the kill and Sawyer’s defenses are coming up.

  “You know you can come to me with anything. You need something, I need to know.” Dane crosses his arms over his chest and widens his stance. Oh yeah, like that’s gonna work. He can do that too, babe…have you seen

  Sawyer?

  “Appreciate it, bro, I do, but there’s nothing you need to fix. I don’t need to be mothered.”

  “Yeah, how about needing to be friended? Where you been staying?” The veins in Dane’s neck and forehead are all on display now.

  “CJ’s,” Sawyer answers, voice getting louder.

  Wow, it got really uncomfortable in here really fast and I have no idea why. It’s not like he’s got track marks up and down his arms or anything, so there’s no need for that kind of intervention. I think maybe we all just need to calm down.

  “Dane,” I attempt to mediate. “Saw…”

  “Baby,” Dane speaks to me now, keeping his temper in check, but barely. The storm in his eyes and hard set of his jaw are scary, quite frankly. “Can you go find Bennett and see if they want to go to dinner with us?”

  I’m being dismissed, but I don’t care. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know I want out of this room. “S-sure,” I falter, giving Sawyer a questioning glance.

  He chuckles. “We’re fine, Gidge. I’ll be moved in soon, k?”

  I nod and hustle out of the room and all the way to Bennett’s door, knocking feverishly.

  “Come in,” she says brightly, but then quickly notices my face. “What’s wrong?”

  “Where’s Tate?”

  “Tate!” she yells, clutching my shoulders. “Laney, what’s wrong?”

  “I don’t know, but Dane wanted me to leave.” I look up as Tate walks in. “Oh, Tate, hey, can you go next door? Dane and Sawyer are—I don’t know—something about CJ’s and Dane told me to—”

  “Shit,” he mutters. “Yeah, I got it.”

  “What is CJ’s? What’s going on?” Bennett asks me after Tate runs out.

  “I have no idea, but Dane isn’t happy about it and Sawyer’s annoyed about being called out and they didn’t want me there. I don’t want them fighting or anything.” I bite my nails worriedly.

  I’m probably overreacting. Dane and Sawyer would never really fight, but damn if I didn’t feel like a spectator to something ugly watching the two of them throwing off testosterone and evil glares like lions circling the one female left in the whole damn jungle.

  “Stop!” Bennett pulls my hand from my mouth. “It’ll be fine. Tate will calm them down.”

  She’s right. Tate’s the counselor and he’ll mediate and everyone will calm down and go about their day, but there’s a story there. And we have this unspoken rule in the Crew that we don’t air each other’s dirty laundry, so I’m gonna have to get it out of Sawyer.

  I’m dressed and ready, just waiting for Dane and Sawyer to show up so we can head out to Parker’s wedding. I still can’t believe he’s getting married. And having a baby. And no longer in college, but running the farm.

  Life sure has a funny way of saying “F you” to people’s plans and deciding things for them.

  Is that what’s happening? Is Parker’s life being decided for him? I know Parker and he’ll always do the right thing, foregoing whatever it is he wants for what someone else needs. I really hope that isn’t the case here.

  Regardless of what I think (and I’m not even completely sure of my position), it’s too late to talk to him about it now. I can’t pull him aside at his own wedding and grill him. Besides, Evan’s been around, he’d know if things weren’t on the up and up. If Evan tells me this is what Parker wants, I’ll believe him.

  “Well, don’t you look like a wet dream?” Sawyer’s voice startles me and I look up to see him looking down at me with a lecherous smirk.

  “Gross, but thank you.” I smile and hug him. “And you look very handsome as well.” I straighten the collar on his light blue button down shirt, which is tucked in to pressed beige dress pants. “You clean up nice, big boy.”

  “I know.” He shrugs and wiggles his eyebrows. “But you, Gidge—I didn’t figure you even owned such a pretty dress.”

  “I didn’t,” I admit, twirling in my yellow strapless dress and tan platform wedges, “I borrowed it from Bennett.” The outfit is pretty casual. I mean, it’s a farm wedding in Georgia, but still more feminine than I usually wear. “It’s comfy, though, I like it.”

  “Me too, a lot.”

  My whole body responds to his voice, a wave of tingly warmth starting at my toes and ending at my cheeks. I turn and take in my man, looking like GQ Boss Sex on Legs.

  He’s in dark slacks, a black belt with silver buckle, and a charcoal shirt and silver tie; I swallow my tongue a little as I shamelessly peruse him from bottom to top. His dark brown hair sticks up just a little in the front, his matching brown eyes bewitching me with their sparkle.

  I can’t help but catapult myself at him. “You look wonderful, Mr. Kendrick. Like, too hot to be allowed out in public, really.”

  “And you,” he traces my neckline with his finger, then across my collarbone which is exposed in this dress, “showing up the bride. Not very nice you, beautifully sexy girl.”

  “Good God, you horny fucksticks, let’s go.” Sawyer opens the front door with a bang. “We don’t have time for this. You break the golden rule, Gidge, and we could be here all day, or get plagued by locusts for disturbing the great design. So come on.”

  Oh, I have to ask.

  “What golden rule?” Instinctively, Dane’s hand tenses in mine. He must know the S-bomb coming, which I’m sure is a real doozy.

  He smirks, delighted that I asked. “You get it up, you gotta take it.”

  Get wha— Ohhhh, I get it. I shake my head at him. “Good L
ord, Sawyer!”

  Good to see the old Sawyer’s trying to make a comeback, at least.

  The drive to Parker’s isn’t tense like I had worried; Dane and Sawyer seem to be over their mysterious argument. We laugh and listen to music like it never happened and I’m more than a little relieved.

  When we get there, I can’t believe the transformation. Whitley did an amazing job—the wedding is gorgeous. Pink and white done threw up in here and you can’t see the fans she’s got hidden somewhere, blowing hard enough you feel a breeze though nothing’s flying off the tables. Riddle me that one, Batman. But really, you’d never know you were in a barn or in blistering heat.

  For the ceremony, I take a seat in the front row beside Angie and let a few silent tears fall when I glance to see who’s seated on Angie’s left. It’s an empty chair with Dale’s cowboy hat and one single white rose.

  He’s there, front and center, blessing his son.

  Zach is seated on the other side of Dane, looking dapper in his nicest clothes, and I’d hugged the breath out of him upon first sight. Interestingly enough, it was Zach who’d reassured me this wedding is a wonderful thing and that Parker is more than happy in his decisions. Evan popped his head into the conversation and also told me not to worry, that Parker’s “over the moon” about the direction his life has taken him.

  Speaking of Evan, he stands at the front as Parker’s best man and looks handsome as ever in his cowboy boots, black pants and white dress shirt, pink rosebud pinned to his chest. He winks from under his black cowboy hat when I wave at him and pats Parker’s shoulder with a smile as the music starts.

  Whitley comes down the aisle first, the maid of honor, and looks absolutely beautiful. I can’t resist but look back at Evan and smile from the deepest part of myself at what I find. His eyes are glued on her, and he mouths “I love you” to her. He truly does; I can see it from here—Evan is sincerely in love. And with Whitley’s big blue eyes right back on him, I can see that he’s loved right back.

  I reach over and take Dane’s hand in mine, pretty damn in love myself. At the end of the vows, Parker whoops, yes whoops, and throws off his cowboy hat, dipping his very pregnant bride for a very non-wedding like kiss. Everyone laughs softly and claps—classic Parker.

  P.S. Just how pregnant is Hayden? The girl is huge. I’m never getting pregnant. I ache just looking at her.

  The reception is, you guessed it, in another barn! It’s lovely as well, all the tables covered in pink, a DJ and dance floor laid down, punch and cake and exhilaration in the air. Dane and I make our way over to my dad’s table, where he sits with his date, Rosemary, and Evan’s parents.

  “Laney!” Mrs. Allen jumps out of her chair and wraps me up in the kind of hug only she can give. “So good to see you, baby girl!” She catches Dane and pulls him in for an embrace as well. “And you must be Dane.”

  I honestly couldn’t remember if I’d introduced them at the funeral or not; guess I got my answer.

  “Yes, ma’am,” he says.

  I’ve never heard him say ma’am before. I guess the farm just brings out the Southern manners in people.

  “Dane, this is Charlotte Allen, Evan’s mom. And this,” I move to his dad and lean over, hugging his shoulders, “is his father.” I lean down and kiss Mr. Allen’s cheek. “Hey, Pops.”

  Mr. Allen reaches back and pats my hand on his shoulder before standing and shaking Dane’s hand. “Nice to meet you, son. Heard a lot of great things about you from Jeff. Says you’re real good to our Laney.”

  “Yes, sir, I try,” Dane answers, then shifts and extends his hand to my dad, who’s also risen. “How are you, Mr. Walker?”

  “Jeff, boy, how many times I gotta say it?”

  “Daddy,” I wrap my arms around his middle, noticing it’s a bit bigger, “stop teasing him. Hi, Rosemary,” I lean my head around him and smile at her. I’m ecstatic my dad is finally dating again. He’s quite a catch if I do say so myself, and Rosemary is a kind woman, a widow whose only son is about five years older than me and out of the house.

  “There he is!” my dad hoots, and I don’t have to turn around to know he means Evan. My dad’s been saying the same thing to his entrance for over ten years.

  “Mr. Walker,” Evan greets him.

  “Jesus Christ, I’m gonna have to start wearing a name tag with you boys. My name is Jeff,” my dad insists.

  I turn now, to greet Evan, and am immediately pummeled by an overzealous hug from Whitley.

  “Laney! I love your dress!”

  I can’t help but grin. She really is this nice, it’s not an act. What a bitch I’d been to judge her, dislike her, for…well, nothing really. And here we are now—friends. “Hey girl! You did great on this wedding. It’s really beautiful.”

  “Thank you! It was so much fun. Hayden just let me do whatever I wanted.” She giggles. “She’s too tired to care.”

  “I bet.” I lean in to whisper, “Is it just me or is she like two hundred weeks pregnant?”

  Whitley can’t contain it and busts out laughing, tugging on Evan’s arm. “Evan, come here. Okay, Laney, tell him what you just said.”

  “Um, I just asked how pregnant Hayden was,” I mutter, embarrassed. “She seems pretty big.”

  “That’s what I said!” Evan offers me a knuckle punch. “Don’t worry, we’re not crazy. She’s got three of them lil’ nuggets in there.”

  Three?

  “God help him,” Dane mumbles, now right behind me with his hand finding the small of my back.

  “No shit, right?” Evan chuckles. “Hey, man, how are ya?” He shakes Dane’s hand.

  “All right, ladies and gentlemen!”

  We all turn, fearful…Sawyer has the mic.

  Zach strides up and verbalizes all our thoughts. “Who the hell gave Beckett the mic? There’s grandmas and kids here.”

  “Please welcome, for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Parker Jones.”

  Well, that was okay. I sigh in relief.

  In walk Parker and Hayden, hand in hand, permanent smiles plastered across their faces. We all stand back in our little group and watch as the crowd envelopes them, waiting our turn.

  “Where’s Hayden’s family?” I wonder out loud.

  “Just a mom,” Evan answers, “the one in the purple dress to her right.”

  “What’s Ang think about triplets?” I whisper.

  “Oh, she’s thrilled! So am I!” Whitley squeals. “How much fun will that be?”

  Um, not much, I think to myself.

  Evan looks at her adoringly, sliding an arm around her waist. Hmm…perhaps they’re even happier than I thought? I’ve never seen that exact smile on Evan, clearly earned only by the new and glowing Country Whitley.

  Parker had called me a while back to explain that he was giving Evan part of his land, to make sure I understood why he was doing it. Of course I did; my life is different now. This place will always be home, but I don’t see myself coming back and being a farmer or a farmer’s wife. Evan, however? It’s a perfect fit for him, and Whitley appears to be totally on board. I might even say…in her element? Her smile seems brighter, an extra twinkle in her eye, not so uptight and unsure anymore.

  I still think Parker’s settling down a bit early myself, but I never worry about the head on Evan’s shoulders. Then again, I’d go live on the moon if that’s what it took to be near Dane. I would not, however, start spitting out moon babies or quit school and softball, and Dane would never ask me to.

  “We’ve got a special treat for you all now.” Oh God, Sawyer’s talking again. “Whitley, come up here and do your thing, girl.”

  We all look at Whitley, who goes up on her tiptoes and kisses Evan quickly. “See ya in a bit.”

  As she walks to Sawyer and the stage, Evan sticks his fingers in his mouth and whistles his approval. And then the Larks start shuffling onto the stage as well—I don’t even know where they came from. Oh wow. This is gonna be cool, I just know it. I squeeze Dane’s hand in
excited anticipation and he looks down at me and winks.

  “Thank you all so much for coming, and congratulations again to Parker and Hayden. We’re the Lovely Larks,” Whitley sweeps her hand out to introduce the ladies, “and we’re going to start with the bride’s choice for their first dance. This is ‘When You Say Nothing At All.’”

  “Great song,” Dane and I both mumble together.

  Poor Hayden, she almost looks like she’s not moving at all, just bobbing like one of those Weeble People that had the rounded bottoms and went in their little school bus.

  Anyway…she’s round. But we’ve established that.

  Dane wraps his arms tight around me from behind and whispers in my ear, “I love you.”

  I reach one arm back and cup his cheek. “I love you too, Dane.” I listen to the song, immersed in the Larks’ perfectly harmonic voices, and watch Parker gaze at his wife, completely enamored. “Do you think they’re crazy? Too young?”

  “Do you?”

  “Maybe, I don’t know. It just seems crazy to think of. I mean, they’re our age, my age.”

  “I think it’s different for everyone,” he says quietly. “More about the specific person than the age.”

  “Yeah, I guess so.”

  We all clap when the song ends, the floor now open for everyone to dance. The Larks do some really cool things with some great song choices, and I manage to steal a dance with my dad, Parker, Zach, Evan’s dad, and even Evan before Dane’s finally had enough of “sharing is caring” and stakes his claim. We dance to several slow and fast songs, some sung by The Larks, some played by the DJ, before we finally make our way to say goodbye to the bride and groom.

  “Parker, we’re gonna go. Congratulations.” I tear up a little as I hug him. “I love you, brother. Be happy.”

  “Love you too, Laney.” He squeezes me back. “Thanks for coming.”

  “Hayden,” I hug her then rub her belly, “you take care, lil mama. Get some rest and call me if you need anything, okay?”

  “Ya’ll don’t be strangers now. Parker loves seeing you, Laney.”