by Dawn Brower
“Darling,” he said in a husky tone. “There has never been anything pretentious between us.” He leaned a little closer. “Set the plate down and come for a walk with me.”
She couldn’t do that. Victoria was not ready to be alone with him. She couldn’t be certain she ever would be. “I’m starving,” she lied. “Perhaps we can go for a stroll later this afternoon.” Victoria intended to be very busy the entire day.
“All right,” he said. “Bring your plate with you. There’s enough food there to feed us both anyway.”
Victoria stared at the overflowing food. He was correct in that assessment. There might even be enough there to feed three people. “I’d prefer to eat at the table.”
She didn’t wait for him to respond and headed straight for the table. Victoria stopped momentarily and considered where to sit. She didn’t want to sit by Brianne and have her ask probing questions, but it would look bad if she took a seat farther away. There was no solution. She went to the chair across from Brianne and sat. A servant brought her a cup of coffee and a glass of milk. She sipped at the black coffee more for something to do than anything else.
Where was William? She turned and glanced back at the buffet. He’d left. Victoria took a deep breath and continued eating. Somehow, she had survived her first interaction with William. The question was: would she be able to keep him at a distance for her entire stay?
Chapter 7
William stared out the window of the library into the night sky. His frustration had reached the boiling point. It had been a week since Victoria had arrived at Lilimar, and he still hadn’t found a way to have a real conversation with her. The little they said to each other was beyond inconsequential. Silly things like the weather and how much food she’d had on her plate. The entire thing was going nowhere.
He ran his hand through his hair and let out a long drawn out breath. William refused to give up. It had been difficult, but there was nothing worse than not having her in his life. He would find a way to reach her and make her understand how much he needed her. That he loved her…
“It can’t be as bad as all that,” a man said as he walked into the room.
William turned and found his twin cousins, Alex and Drew, near the entrance of the library. They were identical from their golden blond hair, cobalt blue eyes, to their tall, lean, muscular physique. They even wore matching wicked grins. Sometimes William found that annoying… “Don’t you two have something better to do than harass me?” Alex had been the one who’d spoken. Drew probably would say something antagonizing any moment though.
“That’s what family is for,” Drew said right on cue. “We can’t very well make things easy for you.” William would not roll his eyes. It was hard, but he managed to not give any outward signs that he was annoyed.
“Right,” he said slowly. “I’ll keep that in mind the next time I visit the two of you in England.” William walked over to the small bar table near the large mahogany desk and poured a snifter of whisky. He glanced at them and said, “Do you want some?”
Alex wrinkled his nose. “No, thank you. I don’t know how you drink that stuff.” He gestured toward another decanter. “Pour me some brandy.”
“No,” William said with a quick shake of his head. “You have two hands. Pour your own glass.” He lifted his whisky to his mouth and drained half the glass. It was probably not a good idea to drink, but he didn’t know what else to do. Besides, he hadn’t spent much quality time with his cousins. So why not imbibe a little with them. They both liked their brandy, and it would give them time to reconnect.
“You’re an arse,” Drew said. He walked over to the decanters and poured two glasses of brandy, then picked them up. He carried them over to Alex and handed him one.
“And you’re too kind,” William said and then took another sip of whisky. “What are the two of you really doing here?”
“Will,” Alex drawled. “We do this every year. You know, the family Christmas thing. Did you hit your head? Should we call for a doctor?”
“Don’t pretend you’re unaware of what I am talking about,” William said acerbically.
Alex lifted a brow and sipped his brandy. Drew chuckled and shook his head. They both strolled over to the settee and sat. William had a bad feeling about the entire thing. He sighed and sat in the chair near them.
“All right,” Drew said. Amusement reverberated through his voice. “You’ve figured us out. We have this mad scheme, and we are here to abduct you.”
William shook his head. He shouldn’t encourage either one of them. They were relentless menaces, and there was no risk they wouldn’t take. “I do hope you’re not serious.” He only had so much patience, and lately, he didn’t have anything near his normal tolerance for nonsense.
“When have you known us not be?” Alex wiggled his brows suggestively. “We have something extra special planned for you.”
He groaned. When it came to Alex and Drew, that definitely was not a good thing. “I don’t have time for this.”
“Of course you do.” Drew drained his glass and then stood. He walked over to the decanter and refilled his glass, then held it up and waved it toward Alex. “Do you need a refill?”
Alex finished his brandy and held his glass out for Drew who had carried the decanter over to the settee. He filled Alex’s glass and set the half-empty decanter on the side table. “Now, where were we?”
“Will’s surprise,” Alex reminded him.
“I don’t need a surprise.” His tone was gruff, and he didn’t care.
“You really do,” Drew said. “You’ve been a bit uptight since the day we arrived. You need to…relax.”
“Trust us,” Alex said. He tipped his glass toward William in a salute. “We will take good care of you.”
“Well,” Drew began. “We might not, but your gift most certainly will.”
He was starting to decode their innuendos. They either had a woman ready for him or they planned to drag him to a bawdy house. That was the last thing William wanted to do. He didn’t want to find pleasure in the arms of a woman who sold her body. That would leave him feeling emptier than he had before. “I’ll have to pass on your generous gift.” He drained the rest of his whisky and then went to the bar to refill his glass. Drinking his pain away was starting to sound better and better the more he talked with the twins.
Alex turned to glace at Drew. “We might have to knock him out and drag his unconscious body to the autocar.”
Drew tapped his hand on the arm of the settee, then glanced at William. “I had hoped he would see reason.” There was a hint of feigned disgust in his voice. At least William thought he was faking it… “But we will have to save him from himself.” He took another swig of his brandy and then stood. Drew started to roll up his sleeves. “This really is for your own good.”
Alex came to his feet and mimicked his twin’s actions. Bloody hell… “We are not doing this,” William said sternly. “If we brawl in the library, Mother will be most displeased.”
“I am certain she will be,” Alex said matter-of-factly. “But it wouldn’t be the first time one of our parents gave us a stern lecture. This is almost a tradition.”
Before he could stop them, his cousins leapt toward him and wrestled him to the floor. They rolled around, knocking furniture down. A vase flew from a table and crashed to the floor. Tiny shards spread everywhere. His hand hit one of them, and a sting of pain spread through his palm.
“What the…” a woman said. They all froze and glanced toward the doorway.
William cursed under his breath. Of course Victoria would stroll in at the most inopportune time. They scrambled away from each other. Blood dripped down his palm, and his eye hurt a little. One of them, he believed it to be Drew, had elbowed him in the face. He met her gaze and said, “Victoria…” His breathing was heavy, and her name came out a little wheezy.
She stared at them with her mouth agape. Victoria scrunched her eyes to narrow slits. Her forehead wrink
led, and she seemed to be at a loss for words.
“We can explain,” Drew started to say.
“It was all William’s fault,” Alex chimed in. “He was being completely unreasonable.”
William turned and glared at them. He did not need them to throw him to the wolves. It was already difficult enough to have a conversation with Victoria. If they kept speaking, he might never have the opportunity to convince her to stay with him forever. She’d already run away from him once. “Don’t listen to a word they say. They’ll charm you out of your life savings and make you believe it was all your idea.”
“We would never take money from a lady,” Drew said. He held his hand over his heart. “On my honor as a gentleman. We have the highest respect for women.”
That was a load of malarkey if he’d ever heard any. Good God, where did they come up with that drivel? “Why don’t you go do whatever you two planned without me?” Now that Victoria was in the room, he really wanted his cousins to make a hasty exit. The sooner the better. This might be the one chance he had to be alone with the woman he loved.
“We can’t leave without you. That was the reason we sought you out. It wouldn’t be the same if you stayed behind,” Alex said earnestly.
William lifted his hand to brush back his hair, but he never got the chance. Victoria was by his side before he realized she had moved and brought it down so she could look at it. “What did you do to yourself?” She pressed her fingers to his palm to examine his wound. “I don’t think it is too bad, but it needs to be cleaned and bandaged.” She glanced at Drew and Alex. “Whatever you have planned, it will have to wait. He can’t leave with this wound seeping blood.”
“I suppose we can do it another night,” Alex said.
Drew patted his brother’s arm. “I’m disappointed too.” He snapped his fingers. “But we can always enjoy his gift ourselves.” Drew wiggled his eyebrows. “What do you say, brother. It wouldn’t be the first time we shared.”
Alex shrugged. “Why not.”
Victoria thrust herself into their paths, effectively blocking them from leaving. “Wait. I need to see if either of you were hurt.”
“We’re fine,” Alex said. “William was the only one who managed to fall on the broken vase on the floor while we were…”
“Fighting like children,” Victoria supplied, and then waved her hand. “Fine. Go play with someone else.”
“Oh, we intend to,” Drew said and winked at her. “Take good care of Will. He looks like he needs it.”
They both left the room.
“I probably don’t want to know what they meant by any of that, do I?” Victoria stared after them.
“It’s for the best if you remain ignorant. Trust me, I don’t even want to know what they’re doing, and I understood everything they referred to.” William’s heart raced in his chest. This was all too much excitement. First his scuffle with the twins, and now the close proximity to Victoria… He couldn’t seem to calm himself long enough to find solid ground. He turned his full attention toward Victoria.
She had strolled over to the desk and started opening drawers. “Do you have any medical supplies?”
“I’m fine,” he said. “I’ve been hurt worse than this.” He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and wrapped it around his hand, then stood. If he didn’t, she’d bring whatever she found to treat him and sit on the floor next to him. He couldn’t allow it.
“I know,” she said quietly. Her face whitened, and he could have kicked himself for that reminder. She’d treated him at that field hospital twice. It had probably left scars in her memories... He moved over to her side to ensure she was all right.
“I’ll clean it later when I go to my room,” he promised. William cupped her cheek. “I’ve missed you.”
Victoria pulled away from him. Her cheeks pinkened, and she started to back toward the exit. “I should go.” At least she had some color back on her face. He’d worried about her for a moment there.
“Please don’t,” William said softly. “I hoped…” He swallowed hard. “Victoria, I was surprised to see you here.”
“I didn’t know you were Brianne’s brother. You never talked about your family.”
“You never gave me a chance to.” He moved toward her. “But I’d like to rectify that if you’ll let me. There is so much I’d like to tell you.”
She met his gaze. A tear fell from her eye, and she shook her head. “I don’t know if I can.”
Victoria was so beautiful. He hated seeing her upset. William reached up and tucked a stray blonde curl behind her ear. He would do anything within his power to take away her pain. “I don’t want to cause you any undo stress. You’re here through Christmas. Can you at least try to meet me half way? Please,” he begged. “I never stopped thinking about you.”
Her lips tilted upward into a wobbly smile. She nodded. “I...I’d like to. But not now. It’s…I need a little more time. Can you be patient with me?”
“For you,” he said softly. “I can wait forever. You’re worth it.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to her forehead. “Good night. I’ll see you at breakfast.” With those words, he left her alone in the library. At least he’d had a few stolen moments with her. He had a chance. That was enough, for now.
Chapter 8
A gentle breeze blew over Victoria. She pressed her knee into the side of the horse she was riding to bring him to a walk. Perhaps it was cowardly of her, but she had to escape the house. It seemed as if everywhere she went she crossed paths with William. Avoiding him was becoming increasingly difficult. She should give in and have a real conversation with him. Her fear was crippling her.
She scanned the area in front of her. Lilimar was a gorgeous estate, and the lands that accompanied it were equally so. She could almost imagine what they would look like in the summer with crops growing in the fields. Not that she had any idea what they planted, but that didn’t matter. The longer she stayed at Lilimar, the more she longed for something she didn’t think she deserved. A life with William… She didn’t deserve him or happiness. Not after she’d shunned anything resembling a relationship with him during the war. That had been her mistake, and she had to live with that decision every day.
Victoria pulled on the reins, bringing her horse to a stop. She was near a large oak tree that sat at the base of a field. A stream ran along the perimeter. She slid off the horse and landed on the ground without incident, then led the horse over to the oak. Once there, she tied the reins to a low branch and headed toward the stream. The tree’s high branches shadowed the edge of the little creek. Sunlight still managed to bleed through, leaving glimmers dancing across the current.
It was much colder in England. Victoria liked the warmer temperature of South Carolina. There was still a slight chill in the air though. She settled down on the ground beneath the oak. She tilted her head back, closed her eyes, and basked in the warmth of the sun. It was peaceful sitting by the stream with nothing but the sounds of water rushing over rocks and a breeze whistling against the branches.
The crack of a branch brought her out of her daydreaming. Her eyelids fluttered open, and she jerked toward the sound. She lifted her gaze and met William’s. Of course he was here. He seemed to be everywhere and nowhere at once. Though the latter was her own fault. She kept pushing him away. “What are you doing here?”
“I could ask you the same,” he said softly. “You found one of my favorite spots. I come here often to…think.”
She frowned. His face was devoid of any expression. He seemed almost forlorn. Victoria wasn’t sure if she should ask him what bothered him or not. She didn’t want to intrude or give him any sort of false hope. In a fortnight, she fully intended to return to England. Still, she couldn’t stop herself from asking, “Is something troubling you?”
He was quiet for a long moment. William glanced away from her and stared at the creek. Her heart beat heavily in her chest. She swallowed, trying to dislodge the lump that had formed in
her throat, but it wouldn’t budge. He blew out a breath and then turned toward her once again. “I am troubled by a great deal. Most things I can work my way through and find a solution, but there is one issue where I can’t discern any resolution.” There was a lot of pain that poured out of those words. They were all her fault. Guilt ate at her. The least she could do was attempt to explain or hear what William had to say.
“Sometimes there is no easy answer or any way to resolve it. Perhaps you should instead find a way to let go.”
“I cannot do that,” he said firmly. “I’d sooner breathe my last breath then let you walk away from me again.”
So they were done speaking around the real subject. Victoria sighed. “We are not meant to be. We never were.” It almost killed her to say those words. “It’s better we parted ways.”
“Why?” he asked. Anger tinged his voice as he spoke. “What reason could there possibly be for you to end things?” He threw his hands up in the air. “Was it the war? There is no more danger. It’s over, and I don’t understand why you won’t entertain the possibility we could have a future together.”
She should be honest with him. It might be the only way that he would let her go. Victoria didn’t know what to do. She stood and went to her horse and untied the reins. This conversation had to end now. It hurt too much to look at him and not know what to say.
“Are you not going to answer me?” he said belligerently. “You’re going to run off and hide like you have been doing the entire time you’ve been here?”
“I don’t like your tone,” she said sternly.
“And I don’t like your cowardice,” he spat the words out. “Fight for us, damn it.”
A tear fell down her cheek. She lifted her hand and wiped it away. She wanted to hate him so she didn’t hurt so much. It was a silly thing to wish for, and she almost hated herself for even thinking it, but it would be so much easier if she could. She never felt anything but love for him. He deserved better than her. “You’re right,” she said softly. “I am a coward. I’ve always been one. The war didn’t give me time to think. Many thought I was brave, but I never was. I’m the least courageous person you’ll ever meet.”