Ruined by the Earl (Marriage by Deceit Book 3)

by Ruth Ann Nordin

  “I’ll be happy to help you pick one out.”

  Since she nodded, he relaxed, feeling a little better about the way he’d ruined her life. Despite everything he’d done, she was willing to give him a chance, and he would do his best to redeem himself.

  He followed her to the doorway, and she stopped and turned back to face him. “Did you mean all those things you told Malcolm about me? You know, about me being fun and how you think we’ll be friends?”

  “Yes. Out of all my faults, lying isn’t one of them,” he softly told her.

  She smiled at him before she headed for the entryway, and an unfamiliar warmth filled his heart.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Logan was a peculiar gentleman. No matter how much Melissa tried, she couldn’t figure him out. She fully expected him to insist she consummate the marriage now that he knew she really wasn’t having her lady’s time of month. But when he came to bed, all he did was wrap his arms around her, give her a surprisingly chaste kiss on the forehead and wish her pleasant dreams.

  That was it. No attempt to touch her somewhere intimate. No lingering kiss on the lips. No comment of a sexual nature. If she didn’t know better, she’d swear he hadn’t barged into her bedchamber earlier that day and had his way with her. But she did know better. It had happened.

  So why didn’t he try to do something?

  All of these thoughts cycled through her mind while her lady’s maid helped her into her traveling clothes.

  “Are you feeling all right, my lady?” her lady’s maid asked at one point.

  “I’m fine,” Melissa replied. “I’m just thinking over everything I need to take for the trip.”

  Since Deb seemed content with her answer, Melissa let her mind wander once more. Maybe there was something in that book Logan had that would shed more light on the matter. She doubted he’d come out and tell her what he was up to if she asked him. Granted, he’d been blunt with her up to this point, but she’d rather find the answer herself, if possible.

  Once the lady’s maid finished and left, Melissa went to the door connecting her bedchamber to Logan’s and almost knocked on it. But then, she thought better of it. This might be a good chance to catch him doing something she ought to discover.

  Her hand went to the doorknob, and she tested it. Good. It wasn’t locked. Not that it had been locked before, but it was nice to know she could still go into his bedchamber whenever she wished. Maybe it meant he trusted her.

  She bit her lower lip. If he trusted her, was she betraying that trust by going into his room unannounced?

  Why was she even debating this? Logan was the same gentleman who barged in on her while she was taking a bath. He had no sense of propriety. If he found her in his bedchamber, he’d probably take her clothes off and have his way with her, saying she asked for it by coming into his room.

  And would that be such a bad thing? Yesterday had been quite enjoyable, after all. She shook her head. No. She wasn’t here to do anything intimate with him. She was here to find out why he hadn’t insisted on starting on the heir last night.

  She slowly opened the door and peeked into the room. It was empty. With a glance behind her to make sure no one had come into her bedchamber, she slipped into his room and softly closed the door. She hurried over to the small room with the desk and opened the drawer. It was empty.

  Frowning, she opened the other drawers. The missives and ledger were where they belonged. She shut the drawers and sat in the chair. What was she supposed to do now?

  After a few seconds, it occurred to her the book was missing because he’d packed it for the trip. In that case, he planned to use it. Her heartbeat picked up. Did that mean he would touch her again like he had yesterday?

  Then another thought came to her. Should she have such thoughts, especially when it came to Logan? But he had told her brother some very pleasant things about her. He’d said she was fun and passionate, and he’d said he enjoyed the fact that she spoke her mind. He’d even said he wanted to be her friend.

  Yes, he’d included the term ‘lover’ in that statement, but the fact that he’d mentioned friendship meant her purpose went beyond having his children. She wondered how many gentlemen wanted to be friends with their wives. She couldn’t imagine many of them did, not from the stories she’d overheard at the balls.

  If nothing else, that proved he wasn’t the cad she’d thought he’d been when she married him. And that was good. It meant there was a possibility they just might get along after all. Perhaps, there might even be love. She didn’t think she’d ever love anyone after Lord Waxman, but then again, Lord Waxman hadn’t been the type who could make her laugh. She had to admit Logan could be funny when he wasn’t trying to irritate her, and she found gentlemen who could make her laugh quite charming.

  With a slight smile, she rose to her feet and left the small room. She scanned the items in the larger room, wondering what Logan planned to take with him. But from the looks of it, the valet had already taken his things out of the room.

  The doorknob to his room turned, and she thought about making a hasty retreat to her bedchamber. But the person opened the door so fast it wouldn’t have done any good. And, as she expected, it was Logan.

  His eyebrows rose. “I’d flatter myself and say you came here in hopes of finding me taking a bath, but I know better.” He closed the door behind him and approached her, hands behind his back, looking amused. “To what do I owe the pleasure of having you near my bed?”

  Her face warmed, and as much as she tried to maintain eye contact, she couldn’t. “I was ready for the trip and wondered if you were, too.”

  He hesitated for a long moment, so she looked at him and saw he was pretending to think over her words. Finally, he said, “I don’t believe you.”

  “Then why do you think I’m here?”

  “I’m not sure. That’s why I’m asking.”

  “I came to see if you were ready to leave,” she insisted, despite the fact that her face grew even hotter. “As you can see, I’m ready.” She motioned to her clothes.

  “My sparkling jewel, I can see why you think I might believe that, but the truth is, I just returned from your bedchamber. I went there to see if you were ready, so I know you’ve been here for awhile.”

  “Oh.” Then he’d definitely caught her in a lie. And this was even more awkward.

  He closed the distance between them, brought her into his arms and shot her a smug grin. Now this was the Logan she was used to. “If you missed me, why didn’t you just say so?”

  His lips lowered to hers before she could respond, and she melted in his embrace. More than that, she found herself kissing him back. She wasn’t sure if she should, at least not so soon after their wedding. She’d worn black, after all. But his kisses were never rough or demanding, and even now, he was holding her gently.

  It’d been pleasant with Lord Waxman. She would never deny that. But it was turning out to be a rather thrilling experience with Logan. And for the life of her, she couldn’t explain why.

  When the kiss ended, he smiled at her, and while there was a hint of smugness in his expression, she noted some tenderness as well. It was the same tenderness she’d seen in him yesterday when he let her cry on his shoulder. There hadn’t been the reluctance he’d had before. No. Yesterday, he’d held her and kissed her and had even apologized for the things he’d ever done to upset her. It’d been such a change from how he’d been since she’d met him.

  He slipped his finger under her chin and raised it so she looked up at him. “I like you this way.”

  “What way?” she asked, uncertain of what he meant.

  “You seem happy to be with me. It’s nice.”

  Her lips curled up into a smile. “And it’s nice that you care whether or not I’m happy.”

  “I do care,” he whispered. “I know I did a lousy job of showing it before, but I always cared. I only kissed you that night because I was desperate to protect my family. If I hadn’t, they
couldn’t stay at the estate, and we don’t have any relatives to lend a hand. I know it was my fault I was in that situation. I won’t make excuses for it. But from the moment I saw you, I thought you were pretty, and even though you were upset with me, I couldn’t help but admire your passionate spirit.” He gave her waist a playful squeeze. “I happen to love that fire in you. Whatever you do, don’t let anyone dampen it.”

  She wasn’t sure how to answer him. He was being incredibly wonderful, so wonderful in fact that if she were to die right now, she’d be content. Since words failed her, she decided to kiss him. And this time, the kiss lasted longer than a few seconds.

  She hoped he might brush his tongue against hers like he had yesterday, and he didn’t disappoint her. She wasn’t sure why this should excite her as much as it did. Perhaps it was because this was far more intimate than a simple kiss. But there was no denying it brought back the familiar ache she’d had the day before when he stroked her to the point where her entire body exploded in pleasure. She wanted to experience that again.

  But when he ended the kiss, he took her hand and led her out the door. “The carriage is waiting. We’ll be taking one, and the valets and lady’s maids will be taking another. I expect we’ll get to Wellington in three days. If conditions are good, we can make it in two, but it’ll be late when we get there if we do.”

  He stopped and turned to her, and as silly as it was, she thought he might actually take her back to the room and take off her clothes.

  But he asked, “Is there anything else you want to bring that your lady’s maid didn’t pack? Maybe something to read? I know the days can seem unusually long when traveling.”

  “Uh…” She forced her mind on his question, praying he didn’t pick up on what she’d really been thinking. “That’s not a bad idea. I hadn’t thought to bring any books.” Then, recalling the book he’d taken from his desk, she asked, “Will you be bringing any books?”

  “Of course. It’s the only time I do any reading. Though,” he grinned, “it would be nice if we enjoyed some conversation along the way.”

  “Where did you put your books?”

  “They’re in the carriage already. Where are yours?”

  “In my bedchamber. I’ll get them and be right back.”

  She fully expected him to follow her into her room, but he waited for her to gather a couple of books and return to him.

  Giving her a smile that actually struck her as sincere, he took the books. “I’ll carry them for you.” Then he set his hand on the small of her back and led her down the hall. “It’ll be nice traveling with someone who isn’t being paid to go with me. I used to have the footman sit with me because I’d grow restless and need someone to talk to. I’m afraid I had a tendency to ramble on about topics that bored him. Well, that was when I could afford a footman.”

  “You can afford one now,” she reminded him.

  “Yes, but I’d rather talk to you.”

  She considered his words and took a good look at him. “You don’t like being alone, do you?”

  He shrugged. “I prefer to be with people. It’s boring when there’s no one to talk to. But I will add it’s nicer when the people I’m talking to want to be with me.”

  They reached the steps, and she urged him to stop and face her. On impulse, she kissed his cheek. It hadn’t occurred to her that part of his desire to be around her so much, even before the wedding, was because he got lonely. Being a gentleman, however, he would never admit it. Gentlemen had their pride to protect, after all.

  “I suppose you’re not such a cad after all,” she whispered.

  She slipped her arm around his and went down the steps with him.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Logan could feel the change in his relationship with Melissa. She no longer seemed to resent him for trapping her into marriage. In fact, she actually seemed to be enjoying his company. He wasn’t sure what it was, exactly, that caused her change of heart, but he wasn’t going to do anything to ruin it.

  So after they got into the carriage, he decided he’d do whatever she wanted, whether that was reading a book or talking. Since she pulled out some embroidery from her valise, he took that as a sign she wouldn’t mind talking.

  As the carriage moved forward, he shifted so that he was facing her. “What are you working on?”

  “I think it’s going to be a lady wearing a beautiful gown.”

  “You think that’s what it is?”

  With a shrug, she got out a thread and needle from her neatly wrapped kit. “To be honest, I only do this on long trips. I haven’t worked on this since I came to London this Season.”

  “Do you have other designs you’re working on?”

  “A couple. Since my lady’s maid packed for me, I’m not sure what she put in here.” She pulled the green thread through the eye of the needle.

  “If you aren’t sure what you’re working on, how do you know which color to use?”

  She paused and glanced at him, her eyes wide as if she’d never thought about it before. And for all he knew, she hadn’t.

  Grinning, he said, “Let me guess. You don’t care what it is. You just want to keep busy so the trip goes faster.”

  She chuckled. “I suppose so. I don’t do that good of a job on these things, so I never keep them.”

  “You don’t keep them? Then what do you do when you’re done?”

  “You’ll think I’m wasteful, but I throw them out.”

  “Why?”

  “They never turn out right.” Then with another laugh, she added, “And I bet it’s because I don’t pay attention to what colors I need to sew. Also,” she lowered her voice and leaned toward him, “I don’t pay that much attention to where the lines are.”

  “Are you telling me you cheat on these things?”

  “No, I wouldn’t say I cheat. I use up all the thread, and I make an attempt to follow the lines. But you know, the carriage can be bumpy at times. So, as you can see, it’s not cheating.”

  “No, it’s not,” he allowed. “However, I would say it’s wasteful if all you ever do is throw them out.”

  She looked as if she were ready to protest then caught sight of his teasing grin and relaxed.

  He thought it was adorable she felt the need to defend herself. Placing his arm around her shoulders, he pulled her closer to him. “There are other things you could be doing to pass the time, you know. You don’t have to bore yourself with needlework.”

  “I wouldn’t say it’s boring, exactly.”

  “I know. It’s better than staring out the window, or in your case, listening to your brother’s mindless ramblings.”

  “Logan, it’s not nice of you to speak of my brother in such a way.”

  “You can’t deny it’s true. All his talk about doing the right thing can get tedious.”

  “That’s not a surprising remark considering you choose to be a cad.”

  Delighted at her retort, he tapped her nose in a playful manner. “My dearest wildflower, all propriety will do is bore you. You deserve better than a dull life. Trust me, it’s far more exciting to live the life of a cad.”

  She didn’t look convinced. “Is it?”

  “Indeed. Take me, for instance. I wouldn’t be here with you now if I’d done as your brother wished. But as you can see, things have worked out quite well. We make a good match, my sweet little buttercup.”

  “Why do you keep referring to me in nicknames?”

  “Because I think they’re nice.”

  “I can’t help but notice some of them have to do with flowers. Is this because Lord Waxman compared me to a flower?”

  He hesitated to answer since it could make her cry. It seemed anything to do with Lord Waxman brought tears to her eyes. But she already knew this was true, so why deny it? “All right. The truth is, I did get the idea from him, but I think it fits you. Every flower is special in its own way. There’s a wide variety of them. No two are exactly alike, at least not as far as I can tell.
And you stand out from all the other ladies because you’re as special as a flower.”

  “I didn’t realize you spent so much time studying flowers.”

  “I don’t. It’s just that while growing up, my mother wanted fresh flowers in the drawing room every day, and I used to pick them for her. She said they made the room nicer.” He shrugged. “You can’t help but notice how they look and smell when you’re the one gathering them every day.”

  “No, I suppose not.”

  “Does it bother you that I do call you nicknames?”

  “At first it did because it seemed you only did it to upset me.”

  “I started doing it to make fun of Lord Waxman. It wasn’t to upset you. But I’m still doing it because I think he had a good point. You are as lovely as a flower.”

  He waited to see if talking about Lord Waxman so much would bring her to tears, but she asked, “If I were a flower, what kind would I be?”

  “A rose.”

  She arched an eyebrow. “A rose? But you just referred to me as a wildflower and a buttercup.”

  “Yes, and they apply. You won’t be subjected to the rules of the Ton. You’ll wear black to your own wedding. I admire that about you. Just as the wildflower, you’ll do what you want. Buttercups are yellow, and you are like a ray of sunshine, especially when you smile.” He lowered his head and whispered, “Your whole face lights up when you smile.”

  She lifted her head, and their noses were almost touching. “I suppose the thorns on a rose represent my constant arguing with you.”

  He cupped the side of her face in his hand. “You’re not arguing with me now.”

  She hesitated, but her gaze met his. “Well, you aren’t being such a cad at the moment.”

  His lips curled up into a smile. “You know what I like most about roses?”

  “What?”

  “They’re strong and dependable, and when they bloom, they are the most beautiful of all flowers.”

  Since she didn’t make a move to pull away from him, he thought she might be willing to kiss him. So he allowed his lips to touch hers. And as he hoped, she snuggled up to him, giving him permission to deepen the kiss, which he was more than happy to do.