House of Christmas Secrets

by Lynda Stacey

  Jess jumped up and out of bed. ‘Oh dear, this is the trouble with pregnancy, you need the loo far too many times a day.’ She opened the door to the en suite. ‘What are your plans today?’ she asked from behind the door.

  Jack thought about his answer. He didn’t want to lie, but he wasn’t ready to tell her about the house, not yet. He needed to keep it to himself, for just a day. He needed the time to digest what had happened, what Emily had given them and he wanted to go to the house alone, to see where his father had lived, to see if there was anything at all that had been left behind, something, anything, that would give him a clue as to who William had been.

  He pursed his lips. It wasn’t that he didn’t want Jess to see the house; he knew she already had. The night before she’d told him about how the girls had used it as a hiding place, how they’d been locked in a cellar and how after they’d been found she’d walked from room to room admiring it. She’d also told him how dirty it was, that it looked close to derelict and he felt the need to clean it a little and make it homelier before she went back.

  ‘Jack … you okay?’ Jess was standing by the bed, undressing. ‘I’m going to take a quick shower. I’m on reception this morning, need to be down there in an hour.’

  ‘Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry.’ He looked her up and down, took in her shape and gave her a cheeky smile. ‘You are so beautiful, Jess. I’m so lucky to have you.’

  She swiped at him with the satin nightgown. ‘Get away with you,’ she said with a laugh.

  ‘Hey, behave.’ He grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him, making Jess land on the bed beside him, naked. She immediately curled her body into his and he threw the duvet back over her.

  ‘It is going to be all right, Jack, isn’t it?’ She looked up and into his eyes. ‘I so want everything to be perfect and I think … I think we kind of deserve something good to happen, just for a change, don’t we?’

  He sighed. ‘Oh, Jess. You deserve it to be more than perfect and it will be, I promise.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yes, really. You tell me what you want and I will do everything within my power to provide it for you.’ He lowered his lips to hers and kissed her gently. ‘You’re going to have everything you want and more.’

  She smiled. ‘I just want you. You’ll be the best father, Jack. I just know it.’ She moved onto her side. ‘I’ve got my first scan at four o’clock. You will come, won’t you?’ She put her hands together as though in prayer. ‘We can meet our baby together.’

  Once again, Jack’s hand went to her stomach. ‘Of course, I will. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.’

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  ‘Yeah, I’ll be needing a skip, the biggest you’ve got.’ Jack pulled at the rotten architrave and watched as it practically disintegrated in his hand. ‘In fact, I could most probably do with a couple.’ He walked from kitchen to living room while holding the phone to his ear. Emily had been right, there was a lot to be done. Everything needed ripping out and tearing down. Emily might have said that it’d been twenty-five years since anyone had lived there, but he guessed that nothing had been repaired, altered or replaced for at least sixty or seventy years, maybe even since the house had been built by Emily’s father, his great-grandfather.

  ‘What … really?’ His shoulders slumped. ‘Two days? But that’ll be Thursday, what’s that?’ He thought for a moment. ‘The twenty-second?’ He sighed and walked back into the kitchen. ‘Yeah, sure. It’ll just have to be okay, won’t it?’ He reeled off the address, put the phone down and looked at his watch. It was still early, not yet ten and he calculated that he’d have around five hours before it got dark and he’d have to leave and get ready to go with Jess for the scan. He started walking back and forth, all the while looking around and wondering about his father, trying to imagine him living in this house. He rummaged through a kitchen drawer that was full of old letters, pieces of paper, old faded photographs, a more than healthy quantity of spider webs, and what seemed like dozens of dead spiders, along with the remains of other odd looking insects.

  One of the photographs was of a man, sitting at a kitchen table. Jack held it up to the light and tried to make it out but the colour had all but faded and the image was hard to fully distinguish. Jack turned in the kitchen; he could just about make out the same shapes and decided that the photograph could have been taken in this very room. He looked to the corner where the kitchen table would no doubt have previously stood. Is that where his father had sat? Was that where he ate his breakfast and dinner while growing up? Did he sit in the lounge, and watch television – did they have one back then? Jack stared at a patch of dust on the work surface that had been disturbed and he allowed his fingers to trace the same path. Was this the exact spot that Jess had touched the day before? He now wished he’d brought her with him, wished she was here to help him make plans. He dug in his pocket for his mobile and thought about calling her, but shook his head and dropped it onto the counter, making a plume of dust fly up and into the air.

  He needed to find a way to turn this house into a home for Jess and the baby. But where to start? ‘Skirting boards, architraves, and the wood chip wallpaper all need tearing out, along with the kitchen cupboards,’ he said to himself as he walked through what he thought might be a utility room and into the downstairs bathroom. ‘And you are definitely going.’ He directed his statement at the bath and the toilet; both were old and stained beyond belief and neither looked like they’d ever been cleaned in the whole history of the house. His hand went out to flush the toilet, but he thought better of it, and decided to get a plumber in first, just in case the flushing caused a flood. ‘Electrics.’ He flicked a switch on and off, and pulled open the cupboards looking for the fuse box, but couldn’t find it. ‘I guess you’ll need replacing too.’

  He began making a checklist as he walked up the main staircase, treading carefully on each step as he went. At the top of the stairs were four bedrooms, three that looked like doubles and one that was smaller and obviously a single. The single room sided onto what he thought to be the main bedroom and he decided that he’d speak to Jess and ask if she’d like to have an en suite for themselves and then keep the downstairs bathroom for everyone else.

  For a moment he stood in the centre of the main bedroom. It looked out over the back of the house and had views across the fields for as far as he could see. He tried to imagine living here, going to bed and making love to Jess right here, in this room, just as he’d done the night before. A huge smile crossed his face as he remembered how happy Jess had been when she’d seen the Moses basket, how they’d chatted over dinner, and then afterwards had gone back to the Hall and made love, repeatedly, before laying together, and chatting endlessly about the future, and about the baby, until Jess had fallen asleep in his arms. It had been a feeling of being home, a feeling of knowing how much he loved her. They’d spoken of how everything would change, but in the end they’d both been convinced that it would change for the better.

  He’d pushed aside his own worries about his father. He’d obviously had his reasons for leaving and although Jack had taken it personally for years, he couldn’t take it that way, not any more. After all, his father had never known him, and by the sounds of it he’d barely known his mother either. They’d both been very young, reckless and scared. And although his mum had had no choice but to deal with the situation, to bring her baby up the best she knew how, his father had been nothing more than a child himself, with no real family to help him, and Jack could almost understand why he’d have turned tail and run.

  ‘You’re going to be the best home ever because I’m going to make you the best,’ Jack said smugly to the house as he stepped out and onto the landing, where he looked up at the loft door. ‘And I’m not even going to think about what could be up there.’ He laughed and went back down the stairs and into the kitchen, where a door led off under the stairs. He opened it to see a set of old, rickety downward wooden steps. ‘So that’s where t
he cellar is,’ he said as he remembered what Jess had told him about Poppy and Lily getting trapped behind the door. He looked at the lock, picked up a screwdriver from his tool bag and forcibly removed it. ‘There, that’ll stop you frightening any more little girls, won’t it?’

  The farmhouse was very quiet, almost nothing could be heard and even though the trees were bare, no matter which window he looked out of, nothing could be seen of the Hall. Had it been built that way intentionally? He smiled as he realised that every window ironically faced away from the Hall, making Jack think of the years gone by, when Emily’s father, his great-grandfather, would come here to visit his mistress, knowing full well that wherever he’d been in the house, he couldn’t be seen. It had been the perfect place to escape to.

  ‘There will be no secrets here. This won’t be a house of secrets. This house will be a home, a place of love, and of family,’ he announced to the walls. ‘I’m going to make you all cosy and warm.’ He poked at the wood burning stove, got down on his knees and looked inside. ‘Oh yes, you’ll need cleaning.’ He sat back on the floor and leaned against the wall. ‘So many things need to be done. So, what do I do first?’ he whispered. ‘Do I go and get Jess, bring her here, tell her everything and let her see how bad it is?’ He knew she’d already been inside and, without knowing the house was theirs, she had described it in detail the night before. All the time she’d spoken, he’d listened with interest and on more than one occasion he’d almost told her of Emily’s gift. He nodded his head. ‘I could work over Christmas, and strip the place out. At least then it will be free of the past and when Jess sees it again, it’ll be clean and the rooms empty, devoid of its history and free of the past.’ Again he nodded. ‘It could be a wedding gift for Jess, a New Year surprise.’ He stood up. He thought about how after the wedding he could bring Jess here and carry her over the threshold and show her what he’d done. And then, together, they could plan how to transform the farmhouse. They could choose a kitchen – he could imagine it now, a real homely one, with a long oak table in the corner where Maddie and Nomsa would turn up and perch while they all cooed over the baby.

  Jack thought of his plans for the next few days, his work rota and all the times he could escape without Jess becoming suspicious. Again he looked at his watch. Jess had the scan appointment at four and he’d promised he’d be there. A smile crossed his lips. ‘I’m going to meet my baby,’ he whispered to himself. ‘But I have to be back and at work by six.’ He knew that for the next week, at least, he was scheduled to work evenings. He sighed. ‘So, you house, you will have to be worked on during my mornings.’

  He began picking up pieces of old left over furniture and dragging them outside. The skips would be a couple of days, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t begin the emptying, pulling out the old and getting it ready for the new. He also thought of the contractors who had worked on the Hall and he was sure that he knew at least one electrician, plumber and plasterer who’d be happy to work for the extra money over Christmas.

  He thought about Jess, about what kind of kitchen or bathroom she’d want. Whether she’d want carpets or wooden floors. He was determined that everything had to be perfect, everything had to be just as Jess would want it and once it was transformed, it had to be safe and ready to move into, as a family.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Jess furiously paced up and down the hotel reception. She looked up at the clock, whilst repeatedly flicking the top of a pen, up and down, up and down.

  ‘Where is he, Maddie? We’ve got a very important appointment and he promised he’d be here.’ She dropped the pen down and onto the diary.

  ‘Jess, he’ll be here, Jack’s never late. In fact, he’s normally twenty minutes early to go anywhere, you know that.’ Madeleine walked from reception and into the dining room, where she picked up a handful of salt and pepper pots, before carrying them into the kitchen.

  Jess once again looked back up at the clock. Maddie was right. It was almost three o’clock, and during the past eighteen months, she’d never known Jack to be late, not once.

  So where was he?

  Jess turned, went to the dining room and picked up the remaining salt cellars and followed Madeleine into the kitchen, where Nomsa stood with her hands on her hips.

  ‘There you are, Maddie. Now all the starters are organised. Soups in the pots and Bernie’s preparing the mains. The majority of the desserts are either in the fridge or on the side waiting to go in the oven.’ She untied her apron and, with a tray in her hands, she walked towards the door. ‘Now, it’s my afternoon off and if you’ll excuse me I have a game of Scrabble planned with Lily and Bastion.’ She blushed. ‘Oh, they both think they’ll beat me, but do you know what, I’m planning on whooping their asses.’ Her Caribbean tone sang out. ‘Oh, Maddie, you don’t mind me taking a tray up, do you? I promised I’d take up some hot drinks for me and Bastion, and a glass of lemonade for our little Lily.’ She indicated the tray. ‘That is okay, isn’t it?’

  Madeleine nodded and started to fill the salt and pepper pots. ‘Of course, Nomsa. You’re more than welcome to anything you want, you know you don’t have to ask.’ She pointed to the fridge. ‘If I’m right there were some of your lovely mince pies in the chiller. Why don’t you take a few of those up with you too?’

  Nomsa put the tray down, opened the fridge and put half a dozen of the mince pies on a plate. ‘Well, I know Bastion likes my baking and he’ll appreciate these, that’s for sure.’ She gave them both a knowing smile and then turned, picked up the tray and made her way to the back staircase.

  ‘Well, what do you think about that?’ Madeleine asked Jess. ‘They’re getting a bit cosy, aren’t they?’

  Jess wasn’t sure whether to mention the kiss she’d witnessed and shrugged her shoulders. ‘Maddie, I really don’t care if my dad’s having it away with half the Women’s Institute. I’m too busy being annoyed with Jack.’

  Madeleine turned. ‘Jess, give him a break. Have you tried his mobile?’ She began placing a selection of linen napkins on the table. ‘Anyhow, what is it with you at the moment? You seem a bit distant.’

  Jess stared at the floor. She and Maddie had always been close, and it was becoming more than obvious that she couldn’t keep the news of the baby to herself for much longer. After all, since they were very young, they’d always told each other everything, and even though she’d promised Jack, he’d let her down. And now all she really wanted was to tell her big sister about the baby.

  ‘Maddie, I’m … I’m pregnant.’ A long, shrill squeal came from her sister’s lips. ‘I’m … I’m ten weeks pregnant,’ she tried to say, but felt sure she hadn’t been heard until Madeleine spun around on the spot.

  ‘Oh my God, Jess. How could I have been so blind? I mean, I should have guessed, you’ve been a real moody cow for weeks now. When did you find out? Why on earth didn’t you tell me? Look at you, there’s nothing of you. What did Jack say?’ Madeleine threw out questions one after the other, as her hand went straight to Jess’s stomach. ‘Hello, little baby, hello in there. Hello. Can you hear me? I’m your Aunty Maddie.’ The words came out as more of a screech and for a few moments Jess enjoyed the closeness of her sister’s hand. ‘I’m going to spoil you so much. I am. Do you know that?’ She leaned over and planted a kiss on Jess’s stomach. ‘Oh, Jess. I’m so in love with her already.’ Madeleine sat up, but her hand remained on Jess’s stomach. ‘She’ll be beautiful, just like you.’ Tears of joy sparkled in Madeleine’s eyes.

  ‘It could just as easily be a boy,’ Jess stated. ‘And it’s still early days. It’s my first scan, Maddie and it’s in less than an hour, and Jack should be here. He promised he’d go with me.’ Jess felt herself being hugged and squeezed by Madeleine, before being pushed towards the kitchen bench and forcibly sat down.

  ‘But you’re only ten weeks, isn’t it early for a scan?’ Madeleine looked concerned. ‘Is there something wrong?’

  ‘No, not really. The doctor is just b
eing cautious because of all the trauma. I only found out just before Emily died.’ Jess knew her own body well; she remembered how she’d picked up on how she’d felt different immediately, and the moment she’d missed her period she’d known. She’d only waited a few days before she’d bought the test.

  ‘Well, that proves that Jack’s just running a bit late. He’ll be here. You know he wouldn’t miss something like this, not Jack.’ Maddie continued to hold her hand to Jess’s stomach.

  ‘Do you know what, Maddie? He really didn’t take the whole idea of pregnancy and our having a baby too well, not at first.’ Her voice broke as she looked up at her sister. ‘But … last night, he apologised, he said everything was going to be okay. He promised.’ She put her hand over Maddie’s. ‘He’s even bought a Moses basket, like the one you had with the pretty white broderie anglaise interior. I know it’s a bit soon, but when we went back to the room last night, it was there, all set up, all ready and looking so beautiful,’ She looked out of the door and into reception. ‘But now, he hasn’t turned up and … What if he’s had second thoughts?’

  Maddie sat back on the bench. ‘Oh, Jess, you know Jack better than that. He wouldn’t take off.’

  ‘I don’t know any more. Last night everything was perfect. Jack was so loving. We went out for dinner, came back here, went to bed.’ A sob left her lips. ‘I thought he was happy.’

  ‘Hey, come on, this is your pregnancy hormones that are screaming. I’ll try his mobile and then I’ll try his mum, see if he’s up there. He’s probably gone to his mum’s and will be telling her all about the baby. He’ll have lost track of time.’ Madeleine looked at her watch. ‘Now, you go and dry those gorgeous eyes of yours, and get ready to go. You can bet he’ll be here any moment and we’ll have worried for nothing.’