Moonfire

by M. Rae Gogetap

  Finally, the song ended. But another slow song played, and Vaz didn’t release my hand from his. “I knew I shouldn’t have listened to Dan when we were first hired to take care of you. Fuck, you’re the only hit I’ve ever given up.”

  My chest tightened as those words sunk through to my heart like tiny knives.

  “That night, when Dan chased the burglar away from my house. It was you, wasn’t it? Not a thief?”

  Vaz smiled at me raising his eyebrows with something akin to sympathy. “Nothing personal. It’s our job, Chelsea. And we’re the best at what we do. But back then, yes, Dan chased me away. He threatened to fight me to the death. He was insane! It wasn’t worth the energy to argue when he was obviously worked up. I figured I’d give him a day to overcome his transient obsession with you.”

  My throat burned, and I tasted acid. The man who called me his girlfriend had been hired to kill me? A cracking pain shot through my chest. Vaz held my back towards Dan. Grateful for this, I blinked as tears spilled.

  “Crying displays weakness, Chelsea,” he murmured, discreetly brushing away my tears. His thumb a hot knife on my cheek, a jagged edge of truth, cutting and burning. His words hurt, but I could feel their truth.

  “So human. Hasn’t Meredith taught you? Angels don’t cry. Neither do demons.”

  I inhaled to fill my chest with a cleansing breath, chasing the tears.

  “I’m part human, yes. But I’m part demon, too. That’s what saved me, wasn’t it? Dan thought I was another human job, but I surprised him.”

  Vaz nodded. “Smart girl. Yeah, you intrigued him. And you know what they say about curiosity? Now we’re in a fucking quagmire. Now, Michael doesn’t trust Dan, therefore Michael doesn’t trust me. He’s threatening to fire us if we don’t start showing results.”

  Dan played both sides. He worked for the Pacem Pomeri and appeased the Portum as well. A double agent. But the way Dan looked at me, the way he protected me… Dan had to be on my side.

  “Dan still works for Michael?”

  “Of course, why do you think he’s hanging around you? You think you’re the only woman who has spent the night at the little cabin in the woods?”

  My toes cramped. No.

  I narrowed my eyes, not taking the bait.

  “So why are you here, Vaz? To finish what you couldn’t years ago? You think Dan will allow you to kill me? He saved me from you at Sunset Crater, and he’ll save me again.” Anger made my head spin. Fast, shallow breaths echoed in my ears. The dance floor was miles away, and I felt intense vibrations of the surrounding auras. My hands tingled, my body craved the forces, the possibilities. I squinted and glimpsed fuzzy energy halos around me. They manipulated me. Dan, Vaz, Fia. Would I ever learn the entire truth?

  Vaz’s smooth voice made me blink, and the fuzzy auras fell away. I felt his hands on my hips.

  “Ah, yes. That bobcat was annoying. Took a lot of energy to get him to stir from his slumber. Where’s a bear when you need one? But the kitty cat followed his orders well.”

  I snorted. “Still alive, aren’t I?”

  “Chelsea, I didn’t attempt to kill you. I was sending Dan a message. He needs to stop coddling you and start preparing you.”

  “You call attacking me with a wild animal sending a message? You are fucking crazy, Vaz!” A touch on my arm quieted my yelling.

  “Vaz, get away from Chelsea, you idiot. Are you trying to cause a scene, it’s almost a full moon! She can’t completely control her powers yet!” a voice scolded. My heart sank.

  I turned to look at the beautiful dark haired woman, my anchor, my one true friend. No. “Seema? You know Vaz?” My voice wavered.

  “I should hope so, as we shared a womb,” Vaz said, grinning at Seema.

  I gasped. My hands clenched at my side as I looked from Vaz to Seema. Seema cocked her head, eyes wide.

  My God. I’d never seen them together until now. Same deep set, greenish-gray eyes, same straight nose. Same latte colored skin.

  “Chelsea, try to relax, you’re agitating the customers,” Seema whispered, not answering me.

  “Where have you been?” I asked. “Wait, you’re his twin sister? You let this monster hurt me, but you said you’d protect me?” I glanced wildly around and saw Dan push Fia out of the booth. She fell on her ass, swearing at Dan, as he rushed towards Vaz and I on the dance floor.

  “I tried to stop him, Chelsea! That’s why I wasn’t with you. I was beating the crap out of Vasuman to break his energy bond with the bobcat. But it didn’t work! I’m so sorry. Believe me. I am your friend, Cee.” Seema looked at me with sad eyes.

  “Let’s go sit,” Dan said, putting his arm around me. “We can discuss everything in private.” I allowed him to lead me to the table. Despite Dan’s warm hand on my back, I felt chilled. Could Dan be trusted? He had hidden dark secrets from me for several years.

  Seema pulled up a chair and reached for my hand. Fia shook her head and rose from the table.

  “Ya’ll are acting like this is an intervention. Except you demons are the flippin’ drugs, so quit acting like Chelsea’s the one with the issues. Spill the beans and let’s move on with our lives.” She stalked to the bar and sat on an empty stool, her back to our table.

  Vaz sat next to Seema, stretching his arm across the leather seat of the booth. He looked from Dan to me with a grin.

  “Vaz, I think you should leave, now,” Dan said.

  “I’m not going anywhere until Chelsea knows everything, Dan,” Vaz said. He leaned forward to me across the table. “It feels so good to get everything off our chests, doesn’t it?” He laughed. I shook my head, looking at the ceiling, then the floor.

  Vaz tapped his fingers on the vinyl-topped table. Tap-tap-tap-tap. Tap-tap-tap-tap. No one spoke for a minute.

  “Okay, here it goes. I killed your mother,” he said, then exhaled in a sigh.

  Dan jumped from his seat. “You traitorous asshole. Shut the f-!”

  Dizziness flooded my head. I put my hand to my temple. My mother had committed suicide. That’s what Meredith always told me. That’s what my Dede said. Vaz lied.

  Vaz raised his hand. “A dozen armed Pacem guards have the building surrounded. I’m not going to stop them from taking you in if you lay a hand on me. We may have been like brothers, but those sentiments may as well be in the past now, right? Especially after my next confession. Or should I say Dan’s confession?”

  Dan returned to his seat. He continued to stare unblinking at Vaz, like he could shoot Vaz with eye lasers of hatred. Dan grabbed my hand and squeezed it, but I felt no comfort from the gesture.

  Vaz sighed. “Where was I? Oh yeah, your mother was pregnant, you see, with you. The pahana,” he said the word with contempt. “You were powerful, even in the womb. You triggered a power surge, letting the world know you’d arrived, ready to save the little humans. But we didn’t know you existed. No, you unintentionally framed your mother, Chelsea. You see, we thought Anya was the pahana. Well, Dan and I were sent to take care of her, right my man?

  But your Aunt Meredith untangled the truth. You see, her brother Nicholas and your mother Anya were in love, and she realized Anya wasn’t the pahana. No it was her baby, Meredith’s flesh and blood, the one of legend. It screwed with her latent maternal instincts. Meredith didn’t want to see her own blood killed at our hands. She figured out the necklace Nicholas bought for Anya acted as the conduit, causing the power surge. So Meredith hid the necklace like a good little Auntie. After you were born, Meredith framed Anya as the pahana. I killed Anya, and we thought demons were safe for the next few hundred years.”

  The restaurant walls tilted sideways. I shook my head. Aunt Mer had my mother killed?

  “Vaz, stop it! You bloody moron! Chelsea, honey, it’s going to be okay. I know this is a lot to take in, but it’s probably best for you to find out now that Vaz is a swine,” Seema said, squeezing my right hand as Dan squeezed the other. I ripped my hands free from their grasps.

 
The scene played before me like I watched a movie. I felt detached from the moment. Observing from afar. Surely this much betrayal and fucked-upedness couldn’t happen to one person. My Aunt had arranged my mother's death? My first boyfriend had been sent to kill me? My best friend was the twin sister of my boyfriends best friend, who had also been sent to kill me and tried to finish the job? The small piece of my heart not yet shattered hardened into stone. I took a breath and looked at Vaz. He spoke the truth which made me respect him. A little.

  “I see, so how did you find out about this?” I said.

  Vaz chuckled. “You’re more demon than I thought. Not crying anymore I see. Excellent. Well, when your power surge occurred sixteen years later, when you found the necklace Meredith had hidden, the Pacem was alerted to another pahana. Meredith should not have placed the necklace in a plastic bag, the amount of energy released after forced stasis for sixteen years exploded into the atmosphere. Dan went in with me since the Pacem was certain I had botched it the last time. Dan did what he did best and he interrogated you. But you screwed with his mind, among other things. He developed feelings for the mark. He became protective of you. A highly skilled interrogator and assassin suddenly decided to settle down. He wanted to know why your aura looked different from humans, yet not the same as a demon. Dan turned his charms onto Meredith.” Vaz smiled, sipping Fia’s abandoned margarita.

  Dan’s hands pounded on the table again. “Enough, Vaz.”

  My vision grew hazy. I saw the fury in Meredith’s eyes the first time she met Dan, how she had chased him out of the house with the Ginsu knife. Later, it was a complete 180, had she been flirting with Dan?

  “The morning I came home from Seema’s,” I said, glaring at her. “Dan, you were already at my house. My God. You slept with my Aunt? Oh. My. God. Oh my God! You were so sweet. Wait, that day... you napped in my bed! Ugh, I’m going to throw up. No. I am going to freaking explode.” When I stood, the room still tilted.

  “Get out of my way, Seema,” I said. She moved, and I kicked Vaz on the way out of the booth.

  “Don’t shoot the messenger, messenger,” he said.

  “You all make me fucking sick!” I shouted, causing several heads to turn to our table. “You all are the sickest bunch of twisted freaks I’ve ever met!”

  Dan ran to my side, trying to take my hands. “Get your hands off of me,” I said. “I trusted you.”

  “Listen to me, Chelsea,” Dan said. “Vaz is correct about most things-“

  Energy filled me, and I could feel my body heating from the inside like a million high wattage light bulbs turned on under my skin. I channeled the energy, pulling power from everyone around me, funneling it through my hands. My palms sizzled and burned.

  “Chelsea, Vaz may be blood, but he stopped being my brother a long time ago,” Seema said, taking my hand. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll figure this all out together.”

  I could no longer hear anything but the winds of energy running through my body. I could feel my hair lifting and blowing around me. As I glared at Dan, I saw deception. My heart shattered because of him, yet the pieces throbbed on with pain. He had saved my life, but at what cost? He promised to help me figure out the ritual, to protect me from the bad guys. His unforgivable lies stirred inside me more hatred than Vaz’s wicked truth. Dan had kept secrets, lied, and concealed them all in a veil of feigned romance.

  “You all can go straight to the hell dimension!” I yelled, holding my arms out palm first. A force left my hands and blasted into Vaz, Seema, and Dan, who all slammed to the floor.

  “Already there,” Vaz muttered, rubbing his chest. But he looked surprised at my attack.

  “Chelsea,” someone said. Heart pounding, I turned. Kale’s tall figure stood before me, his eyes filled with compassion. My soul brewed wild with fear, but his calmness tempered me. Tears threatened again, but I blocked out the feeling of loss. Kale didn’t take his eyes from mine, and I concentrated on his dark brown steady gaze. When his hand took mine, I didn’t protest as he pulled me away from the demons lying at my feet.

  “Take care of her,” Dan called out in a strained voice. He looked pained. Good. He better hurt. He earned it.

  Kale turned and gave Dan a slight nod.

  I saw Fia sitting on the bar stool, watching the scene like she would a stage. Her mouth set in a thin line, her eyes wide. But instead of her usual indifference, she looked sympathetic. I shook my head at her.

  She could drop the act already. Not like I would ever trust her, or anyone else for that matter, again.

  Kale kept silent as we walked into the night. He shrugged out of his jacket and placed it around my shoulders.

  “Where do I go now, Kale?” I could hear the emptiness in my voice. Kale’s arms wrapped around my shoulder.

  “How about anywhere but here?”

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Transitions

  SATURDAY I WOKE up, rubbing my eyes and gazing at the late afternoon sunshine spilling through the vinyl blinds. My heart felt hollow. Empty. I mourned, drowning in grief with a brick tied to my ankle dragging me further into the depths of despair. Betrayal. From every last person I loved. Vaz didn’t want to kill me, but what did the Pacem Pomeri have planned? How could I defend myself against a bunch of powerful demons and billionaires? What chance did I stand?

  A soft knocking startled me out of my self-pity.

  “Come in,” I said.

  Kale opened the door, dressed in an olive green t-shirt and jeans. His long hair fell to his hips, unbraided.

  “Coffee’s ready,” he said. His eyebrows raised like he expected me to jump up and get on with my life as if nothing out of the ordinary happened yesterday.

  “I think I’ll stay in bed for the rest of the summer,” I said, but scooted to a sitting position. I looked out of Kale’s bedroom window. Kale crossed his arms. When he didn’t move from the doorway, I looked at him with a small smile.

  “Thanks for letting me stay here last night.”

  “Don’t pretend to be happy. When people feel sad, it’s better to acknowledge your sadness. Buried deep, it can corrupt the soul.”

  I bit my lip. “It’s better to ignore the pain, right? If I don’t smile, I’ll die from grief, Kale. I have no family left, and all my friends are liars.”

  Kale walked towards me and sat on the edge of the bed. He crossed his arms again.

  “Family in the Hopi way transcends blood. The clan is just as important as immediate blood relations. You can’t choose your parents, and you can’t choose your tribe members.”

  Playing with the worn quilt on the bed, I avoided meeting his eyes. “I evicted a lot of people from my heart last night.”

  Kale nodded. “Your heart, your choice. But someday you’ll restore those spaces. Everyone needs family, Chelsea. You can’t survive without them.”

  “I wish I knew my mother. I don’t remember her. At all. I don’t know… maybe it’s the ideal that appeals to me. But I feel like she would say the right thing. You know, comfort me,” I said.

  “Your mother lives, Chelsea. She may no longer exist in our plane, but she’s out there. It’s possible to communicate with our ancestors,” he said.

  Literally?

  “Too bad my mother has never appeared when I talked to her,” I said, gripping the quilt in a fist.

  Kale turned to me, raising his eyebrows. The look triggered a fluttering in my chest, surprising me. Last night, he had taken me away from the cluster at Big Juanito’s. A savior, and a gentleman. He’d offered to sleep on the couch and gave me his bed.

  My eyes drifted to his muscled arms, the brown skin of his arms. When I stopped staring, my cheeks heated as I noticed Kale’s deep brown eyes crinkle as he smirked.

  “Have you ever tried on the night of a full moon?”

  For a moment my mind didn’t grasp the question, and my cheeks further flushed.

  “Sorry, try what?”

  “Have you ever tried to meditate and spe
ak to your ancestors, your mother, on the night of a full moon?”

  I cleared my throat. “Never.”

  “You want to go to the San Francisco peaks with me tonight? I can show you something you’ve never seen before.”

  Feeling brave, I leaned towards Kale. I raised my eyebrows at him. “Is that what you tell all the girls?”

  His cheeks reddened. “It’s a sacred site. But you’re not an outsider.” He shifted, so his hips angled opposite of mine. Our knees touched, the heat sending warmth upwards.

  “You think I can communicate with my mother?”

  “I think it’s worth a try.”

  I nodded. As my life unraveled around me, the thought of reaching out to my mother, stranger that she was, gave me a thread of hope.

  Kale left the room while I showered. I slipped into last night’s dress and walked out of the bedroom, feeling uncertain.

  “I’ve got to make a phone call,” Kale said. “Coffee’s on the counter.” He closed the bedroom door behind him.

  The barstool at Kale’s kitchen counter wobbled under my weight. I sat, sipping on the coffee he prepared and wrinkled my nose at the hot liquid trickling down my throat. I loved my caffeine heated, especially in the morning. But today the drink raised my internal temperature. Fanning myself, I glanced around Kale’s apartment.

  The kitchen and living area combined to form the space outside of the bedroom. A worn brown sofa and faux oak coffee tables sat in the living area. He didn’t own a television. Since Kale only stayed here a few days out of the week, I guessed he didn’t have time to make it more homey.

  Feeling feverish, I opened the living room window and leaned out, closing my eyes, relishing in the late afternoon wind. Not quite 70 degrees, the breeze felt refreshing on my hot skin. I walked to Kale’s fridge and collected a few ice cubes from the freezer, plopping them in my coffee mug. Much better.

  The drive from town to the mountain road took fifteen minutes. But the Mount Elden road wound up the mountain for miles.

  An hour into the drive, darkness fell in the forest around us. The towering pines that looked picturesque in the day loomed like menacing giants in the dimming light. I turned down the radio. “Not to sound like an annoying child, but are we there yet?”