Autumn in the City of Lights

by Kirby Howell

  A silence grew and lengthened between us. I wondered what exactly this meant for me. And what had changed to make Sam feel enough sympathy for me to bring me water and sit with me?

  “How’s Ben?” she asked.

  “None of your damn business,” I said, amazed I still had the strength to bristle. But it was true. After she treated Ben so callously, she didn’t deserve any information about him.

  Sam stuck her chin out defiantly. “I was just asking because I care about him.”

  “Well, don’t worry yourself. He’s doing perfectly well and very happy,” I lied. “And for your information, he happens to be in a relationship,” I added, thinking of the nurse, Jen. I was sorry the instant the last word left my mouth. Sam raised her eyebrows and looked away, pressing her lips together, though her chin trembled slightly.

  Karl was right. I did have a problem with making things more difficult for myself. I needed to stop and think. I thought of the meditation techniques Grey taught me in Paris and took a few deep, centering breaths.

  “Sorry, Sam.” I meant to say more but couldn’t find the right words.

  “It’s alright. I messed things up for myself.” Her voice was calm, but she brought her hand to her face and, keeping it turned away from me, gently dabbed the corners of her eyes. The gesture reminded me of my mother and how she cried in her movies. Always graceful and ladylike. I had never been able to pull that off when I cried, no matter how I tried to emulate her. I was all hiccups and snot.

  A voice echoed down the hall. Sam stood suddenly. She swore under her breath and started toward the door, then stopped, hesitating.

  I pushed against the wall and stood. My knees wobbled. I wasn’t sure if I was strong enough to stand, so I braced a hand against the wall.

  Karl appeared in the doorway, then took a few steps back, covering his mouth and nose. “Holy God, that stinks... ” Then he saw Sam. “What are you doing here?” I took some satisfaction in seeing the gash I’d made in his cheek with my little screw.

  “I wanted to make sure she was still alive,” Sam said, irritated. “You haven’t allowed her any food or water for five days. Are you trying to kill your only asset?”

  Karl’s eyes narrowed. “That’s not your concern. Get out.” He jabbed his thumb over his shoulder toward the door.

  The color drained from Sam’s face, but she didn’t shrink from him as she passed under his glare and disappeared down the hall. He turned his glare to me, then the room behind me.

  “What are you doing in here? We’re going to have to hose this place down after we’re done with you.” He sighed, then waved to me. “Come.”

  I didn’t move. “I’m not going anywhere with you.”

  “This whole act is getting really old.”

  “It’s not an act.”

  “Do you want to stay in here for another week?”

  “No, I want to go home.”

  “Well, we can make that happen. But you need to come with me first.” He turned and left suddenly. I knew following him would only result in another experience like my last, possibly worse. But what choice did I have? I couldn’t stay here. I needed food and water to survive, and I’d gotten both the last time he’d let me out.

  I took my hand off the wall and straightened, pulling his blue shirt tight around me. Then I followed him out.

  This time I paid attention as we left. It was dark outside, so I wasn’t blinded as soon as the elevator doors opened into the lobby. A marble floor stretched in front of me to the bank of glass doors that led outside. The clean white walls were studded with framed pictures of musicians and gold records.

  Karl held the door open for me as we passed into the fresh nighttime air. As we cleared the entryway, I looked up above us and staggered back. A curved building rose tall above us, and short awnings ringed the building’s windows like never-ending eyelashes. A red light blinked high above us, and I realized I was looking at Brass Ring Records.

  My head snapped toward the dark hill just a handful of blocks north of us. By the weak moonlight, I thought I could see the outline of a small, bent tree at its apex. A memory of the afternoon spent under that tree surfaced in my mind. I was so close. Where was Grey looking for me? All over the world? He would have no idea I was so close to home.

  “Don’t make me drag you; I’m really not in the mood.” Karl’s dry voice interrupted my thoughts, and I pulled my gaze away from the hill and the tree.

  I followed Karl back to the hotel Sam brought me to last time. The wind was dry, and the ground was warm beneath my bare feet. We rode up the elevator in silence, and he showed me to the room we’d been in last time. Instead of distant buildings glowing orange in the setting sun, a dark black city was visible through the wall of windows. It was disturbing to suddenly see so much of the once-vibrant city black and dead. Like unexpectedly coming across a corpse.

  Karl sat down on the plush white sofa. This time, he didn’t ask me to sit. And there was no great pile of food displayed on the table.

  “You and I made some missteps when we last spoke,” he said. “You know it as well as I do. We both need to do better this time if we’re each going to get what we want.”

  I shrugged slightly. “I can’t help you. I don’t know where Grey’s E-Vitamin is.” That was the truth, actually. We didn’t know where his vial was, despite having gone back to Hoover to look for it. It still stung a bit, to remember how useful it would have been to Grey to have his E-Vitamin while trying to formulate a cure for the Crimson Fever and how because of me, he didn’t have it anymore.

  “I think you’re lying,” Karl said. “And I’m also worried I misjudged how much Grey cared for you. Perhaps you aren’t the leverage I thought you’d be.”

  I wanted to tell him I was sure that if Grey knew where I was, he’d be here for me in an instant, but I didn’t want to bait Karl or give him ideas. For the time being, I should let him talk.

  “Do you have any idea how long I’ve been working toward recreating my home world here? I began laying the groundwork over seventy-five years ago. That’s when I met her... ”

  I narrowed my eyes. Seventy-five years? Was he talking about Margery? Had she been with him that entire time? She didn’t look a day over 25.

  He stared out the window behind me at the silent city. “Amazing what men will do for love.”

  Karl, in love? I shuddered at the thought.

  Karl startled me by laughing. “Listen to me! You would never have known I was ever part of that emotionless, traveling freak show... The University,” he added, nodding in my direction, as if I needed help following.

  “I had a small supply of the Elemental Vitamin left when The University forced me out, but I’m afraid we’ve recently run out.”

  “You’re talking about Margery?” I asked.

  “Good girl. You’re keeping up,” Karl mocked. “I met her shortly after I first arrived on Earth and began planning my second attempt.”

  My mind returned to the nameless planet Karl had first tried recreating Andros on. He’d said it was full of the most beautiful humans he’d ever seen, but no one had survived the virus he released, so he’d moved on to Earth. I wondered if he’d expected to kill this many people here on Earth, or if he was only shooting for a 50% fatality rate... or just enough to thin out the population to a manageable amount. I swallowed, feeling dizzy and lightheaded again. How could he value human life so little, but still have the capacity to love Margery as much as he claimed?

  “The University’s one-sided beliefs aside, Margery would have been an excellent addition to their ranks. Smart, adaptable, patient.” He smiled. “Though she’s grown used to the agelessness the E-Vitamin affords us, so you can understand my insistence to secure more.”

  I remembered the pictures on Margery’s dresser at Versailles. That wasn’t her grandmother, I realized. It was her. Then another realization dawned on me... I’d interrupted her with Karl in her room that morning. I thought I’d heard someone else, but wh
en the room was empty of anyone but her, I’d dismissed it. What a fool I’d been.

  “Does she know about Sam?” I asked.

  “Sam?” Karl asked, with a moment of confusion, then nodded with a wave of understanding and glanced at me with a look of mild impatience on his face. “God, how you amuse me sometimes. You honestly think there was ever anything real between me and that girl? She was a means to an end... like nearly everything else on this planet. Did she tell you I was the one to find her after The Plague?”

  “She said you found her in a drug store a couple weeks after her sister died.”

  “Did she tell you what she was doing when I found her?”

  I waited. I remembered her saying he scared her because he seemed to appear out of thin air and that for a moment, she thought he was God, coming to collect her.

  “She was trying to sell herself to a man three times her age for a pallet of bottled water.”

  I stared at him for a moment, searching his dark eyes for evidence of a lie. I shook my head. “You’re making that up.”

  “You can ask her yourself,” he said. “I’m not surprised she neglected to tell you that part. It doesn’t paint her in a very good light.”

  “Why should I believe anything you say?”

  “Fine, don’t believe me, but ask yourself this – did Sam tell you the truth about anything while she was with you in Nevada?” He paused, then said softly, “She did a lot of lying while she was there.”

  “Because you told her to. And if what you’re telling me about Sam trying to sell herself for clean water is even remotely true, it’s only because you scoured the Westside and hoarded all of the supplies for yourself.”

  “So now you’re defending her?” Karl leaned back, shaking his head. “I can’t keep up with you, Autumn.”

  “I don’t trust either of you, but I do think Sam is a tad less contemptible than you.”

  He held up his hands in defeat. “I just want your contempt of all of us to be well-informed. We’ve gotten off topic.” He settled back into the sofa and laced his hands across his chest. “Margery and I are leaving. Very soon.”

  My vision blurred, and I blinked. The carpet swam in front of me. I took a deep breath, filling my lungs and stretching my chest. The carpet settled back into place. “Leaving?”

  “Leaving,” Karl repeated. “Gone from Earth. Not your problem anymore.” He paused, obviously waiting for my reaction. I wasn’t sure I understood, and if I did, I wasn’t sure I believed him, so I just stared back.

  “Don’t you want to be left in peace? Free to be with Grey?” Karl smiled. “Imagine the home you could make together. And the years you have in front of you and how you could spend it with him.”

  “Are you serious?” I asked. “You’re leaving.”

  “Yes.”

  Karl was actually giving up? The world opened in front of me, revealing a sunlit garden behind a small cottage, me working among the tomatoes, and Grey relaxing in the shade of a nearby tree, reading an old worn out book. Connie and Daniel would be coming over for dinner. Rissi and Ben, too. And Shad, of course – my happy thoughts ended there. Shad wouldn’t be there. Neither would my parents, for that matter. Both of their beautiful faces passed before me. They wouldn’t be in this happy picture because of the man slouched on the sofa in front of me. He’d made a mess of two planets already. Decimated populations, ruined civilizations, and skewed history for eternity. And he was leaving to go to another planet. If we somehow found Grey’s lost E-Vitamin and gave it to him, he would live forever some other place. He’d bide his time, waiting and plotting on how to take control once more. Or he might not leave Earth at all. Did I trust Karl to do what he said he would? Of course not.

  Surprise crossed Karl’s face when I chuckled out loud. The noise gave me confidence, and a small flame flickered to life inside my core. I raised my eyes to meet Karl’s black gaze.

  “I can’t give you what you want.”

  Karl continued to stare at me. His eyes slowly clouded with rage, and he took a deep breath and sat forward. He pressed his hands into fists. I could see from where I stood that he was shaking. I was shaking, too.

  He was deadly quiet for a long moment, then looked up at me. My breath caught in my throat. For a moment, it was as if I were staring at pure evil. His eyes were black pits under the dark ridge of his brow.

  His jaw unclenched and, in barely controlled rage, he whispered, “You need to learn that because of your self-righteousness, the innocent people you surround yourself with will be hurt. I’ve tried to warn you, but you continue to practically beg me to do this.”

  He stood, and for a moment, I thought he was going to rush at me, but then he was gone. My heart dropped inside my chest, and I whipped my head around, searching the empty room behind me.

  But I knew where he’d gone. Knew what he was going to do. Or by now, had already done.

  No, no, no, no! What had I done?

  My heart lurched to life again and, panicked, I ran for the door. The hallway was empty. I had to get out of here and get home. I had to somehow stop him. I ran toward the elevator, bare feet sliding on the carpet. I hit the down button and looked behind me down the dark hallway. Still empty. A chime made me turn around, and the door slid open.

  Surprised, Hart looked up from a magazine he held. I immediately began backing away. Where are the stairs? I thought wildly, wondering if I would be able to beat Hart in a race down multiple flights. He charged forward, tossing his magazine to the floor. I dodged one hand, but he caught my arm with the other.

  “No! Please, don’t!” I yelled, fighting the tears of desperation that filled my eyes. “I have to go home! Please, let me go!” I hated the wail that seeped into my voice. His large hand grasped my arm and twisted it behind me, then he grabbed my other arm.

  A scream from inside Karl’s room made me stop. My whole body went cold. I knew that scream. Frightened, yet still laced with a pouty, put out, offensiveness with a hint of the baby she used to be. I felt like I was falling through the floor. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Hart dragged me, half stumbling, back to Karl’s room. I knew what I was about to see, and as much as I wanted to see her, ached to see her, I didn’t want it to be true. Because it meant she had been pulled into this awful mess with me, and I wasn’t sure if I could resist giving Karl what he wanted when he put her between us.

  Rissi was dressed in her pink striped pajamas, and her feet were bare. Her dark hair was loose, the curls a riot around her small shoulders. She was struggling against Karl, who held her skinny arms pinned behind her.

  “Get your filthy hands off her, now!” I exploded, trying to wrench my own arms free from Hart’s grasp.

  Rissi’s curls fanned out as she whipped her head around to look at me. “Autumn!” she screamed, her face crumpling into tears. A bright red splotch stained her left cheekbone. He’d hit her.

  Anger like I’d never felt before bloomed inside me like a giant, ugly flower. It was a blinding, all consuming, soul-shivering anger. I was going to kill him. It was as simple as that. And I wouldn’t feel hesitation or regret. Ever.

  I quit struggling against Hart and stared at Karl. “You’re going to pay for that,” I said quietly.

  Karl took Rissi’s chin in his fingers and tilted her tear-streaked face up to his. He inspected the blossoming bruise then pushed her face away. “When you’re in charge, you don’t have to pay for anything.”

  “We’ll see how long that works out for you.”

  “And we’ll see how much longer you can keep up this attitude of indifference with her here.” Karl’s face hardened further. “Now tell me where that E-Vitamin is!” he yelled, yanking Rissi’s arms tighter behind her, making her cry out in pain.

  “I don’t know!” I shrieked, wrenching against Hart’s grasp on me as I watched Rissi’s face contort with pain and terror. “We lost it! I lost it! The night you attacked Hoover!
” The truth came pouring from me, along with a deluge of tears. “When you disappeared and left me hanging off the side of that hill, Grey was helping me back up and the vial he keeps his E-Vitamin in slipped out from beneath his shirt, and the chain got tangled in my fingers and... and it broke... and it fell over the side of the hill. We couldn’t find it anywhere!”

  My sentences dissolved along with any strength, and I sagged, Hart still clutching my arms behind me.

  “Please stop,” I whispered, staring at Rissi’s tormented face. “Please stop hurting her.”

  Karl threw us back into my little white room without a word. I was relieved but also terrified I’d just made Rissi and myself useless to him. Karl had been keeping me alive so far for bargaining purposes, but now the only thing I knew of value was where Grey kept the vial of Plague virus, and Karl could have an infinite supply of that for all I knew.

  I watched Rissi as she stood looking at the tiny room around us, the Tasty-O’s! box lying on its side, the empty water jug, the two crusty puddles in the corners. I couldn’t let her go through this with me. I was considering banging on the door immediately to call Karl back when Rissi turned to look at me.

  “Have you been here this entire time?”

  I nodded.

  “Where are we?” she whispered.

  “Hollywood. In the basement of Brass Ring Records.”

  “We’re so close to home,” she breathed. “And you’ve been here this whole time... Grey’s going to freak out.”

  “How is... everyone?” I asked.

  “Okay. I mean, you know. Everyone’s really worried about you, of course. Daniel came back from Paris by himself. He told us what happened to Shad.” Her voice pitched up when she said his name.

  “Is Connie okay?” I almost didn’t want to know.

  Rissi shook her head. “She didn’t believe him at first. Then she sort of... well, I guess she had a meltdown. She started freaking out and hitting him. She said it was his fault.”

  I slid down the wall so I was sitting. This was more horrible than I could have imagined.