by Hawke, Jessa
“Oh my god what the hell is this?” Seriously this was complete crap that I was holding in my hands and I can’t believe that I was actually entertaining this crap just so I could go to some book club tonight. Maybe it isn’t too late to ask Sharae if we could go another night, or better yet how about I didn’t go ever and I’d find another way to get in. I get this was her shtick and what got her where she was but that doesn’t mean I have to do it. Not to mention I didn’t even know what the hell I was supposed to wear anyway. Sharae never specified if there was a dress code, but I guess a pair of jeans and a nice blouse would be ok. After all, I don’t have the body to wear some of the stuff that the main character in the book was wearing. There was no way that I was going to be showcasing my huge thighs in some short leather miniskirt that hugged the rolls of fat on my lower back. Nor did I plan on wearing a slutty top that was only big enough to cover my nipples like pasties or modesty patches—whatever they were called. I’m pretty sure nobody wants to see that either, let’s just get this thing over with. Hopefully we can stop by Marcelino’s on the way back. I’m not going to lie, she was right about the food.
“ Her creamy essence was covering his manhood like a raw comb of honey ripped from a beehive by an anxious bear”…What the fuck?
“…She clung to his bronze flesh and allowed him to take her over screaming to the gods in pleasure for the gift of passion that she’d received from her demigod lover…” Oh my god who wrote this crap, seriously!
“Hey Miranda, let’s get moving the meeting starts in thirty minutes!!”
Well here goes nothing.
The drive there seemed to take forever, I figured we’d be going to someone’s house for this book club meeting but I was sadly mistaken. After thirty minutes of twists, turns and streetlights I find myself standing outside a sex shop. I can’t help but laugh at the situation, why wouldn’t it be in a place where a person could meet all of their sexual needs in one place. After all it makes sense, someone gets turned on from reading these crazy stories they can just walk over to the nearest shelf and pick up some quick relief off the shelves. It’s amazing what ten minutes and two batteries could do for a person and I was going to see the freak show first hand. I’m going to have to brace myself.
“Sharae, you never told me that we would were going to be at a sex shop reading the books.”
“Yeah, I thought that maybe if I told you that then you would change your mind and decide not to come.”
“And you would be right. I’m not too comfortable with being in a place like this, even for some books.”
“God Miranda, just come in for a minute and settle down. If you don’t like it, then we’ll leave. Look, you’ve already come all this way, so you may as well just try to follow through. Anyway I’m your ride home so there’s nothing you’re going to be able to do about it anyway.”
Damn, she’s got you there. You’re stuck.
“All right, let’s just get this over with ok.”
As I’m walking in, I’m taking a moment to look at everything around me. This place is plagued with pictures of skinny naked blondes with flat stomachs and double D breasts. Pictures like that usually made me sick, who really wants to see that all of the time? Society makes me sick, perpetuating this idea as if to say anorexia is sexiest thing in the world, and that every guy in the world wants women that looked just like that. It was no wonder why I could never get a date. Even if I saw fit to dye my hair blonde, I still wouldn’t be able to lose a hundred and fifteen pounds overnight to satisfy their needs. Now I’d be forced to sit in a damn room and stare at these false idols of beauty for almost two hours while we read about the same fuckery.
The leader of the book club was not what I pictured at all. She was a middle aged woman a few inches shorter than me, and by the looks of her she could easily pass for one of the teachers back in Minnesota, or even one of my grandparents. Everyone seemed to flock around this lady as if she had all of the answers, but when I asked Sharae about her credentials she told me that she was the leading sex expert, and even wrote four of the books that the club read. Now to my surprise, that old lady had a lot to talk about, but I was more than ready to go home. That was until the moment that he walked in and completely changed my mind about leaving.
A tall guy maybe a couple of years older than me with shining brown hair and piercing green eyes walked into the room with a group guys just as hot. They seemed to be pretty well known in the group and most of the girls seemed to flock right to them. To his credit though, he didn’t seem to be too interested in them. He was so damn hot, the kind of guy that I would love to call home about and brag to mom about bringing him home for Christmas dinner.
“Hey Sharae, who is that?”
“Ooh Miranda, that is Austin from Austin.” She chuckled.
“Austin from Austin?”
“Yeah his parents named him after the city in Texas they were from. Apparently, they are hardcore Texans – super conservative right-wingers. I’ve met them before. Needless to say they’re as backward as their damn political beliefs.”
Wait she’s met his parents? Ask her that again!
“You’ve met his parents? Where did you do that?”
“On campus they came to this big event our business fraternity was having. Since we’re the president and vice president he introduced me to his parents who own some kind of asset recovery business that they plan on having him take over in the next four years.”
Good God he’s a genius too, and he comes from a family with money! Score!
“His girlfriend is a complete bitch though.”
Dammit!
“A girlfriend?”
“Yeah her name’s Brielle, she’s a complete bitch. One of those stereotypical homecoming queens back home that got everything she wanted and was adored by all. Until she got to college and realized that she wasn’t the only big fish in the pond. So now she’s a real bitch with the worst attitude I’ve ever seen in my life. She heads the sigma alpha nu’s on campus, the bitchiest crew in Greek life.”
Of course that’s usually how all these stories went. The charming hot guy was always paired up with the bitchy flat stomached big breasted blonde with a shitty attitude. What a way to shade the light that I thought was at the end of this tunnel. As he cleared a path with his crowd to get to a seat I noticed that the only ones that were available were the ones right next to me. Way to dangle a carrot in front of my face that I can’t have. I tried hard not to glance at him but he was so darn cute that I couldn’t help but peek over at him every now and them. As the night continued on I would simultaneously look at him, while we were forced to read passages of this pretty hot story we’d begun reading by a local underground artist. It was starting to loosen me up a little bit and I was having a pretty good time even when I was asked to stand up and read a passage from the story, it really wasn’t that bad and that’s what broke the ice between me and Mr. Hunky Green Eyes.
“Good job, you really made that story really pop.”
Is he talking to me? Quick let’s test him say thanks
“Thank you.”
“I’m Austin. What’s your name?”
Dear sweet God what the hell is my name?
“Miranda, nice to meet you Austin.”
“Is this your first time here?”
“Yes, I came with my roommate Sharae”
“Oh yeah she’s great…”
Just as I was getting comfortable enough to speak he was called up to the front to read the next passage of the Passion Anthology, completely ruining the flow that I was working on with him. He was so hot and I was appreciative that I could talk to him for those few minutes. It was too bad that he was tied down to a girlfriend because it would be great to get to know a guy like him on a deeper level. From the few minutes I talked to him I could tell that he was a sweet person and had a genuine demeanor to him which I hadn’t seen in too many people in California, other than Sharae. Austin from Austin was just the kind of guy t
hat I could totally see myself having the kind of sex that I always imagined myself having. Just from the look in his eyes I could tell that he was probably a very passionate lover and could probably fulfill my every desire. He also looked like he could possibly be a cuddle type of guy, which was a plus because it meant that he valued the moments that he shared with the person that he was in bed with. Too bad he was tied down.
The book club meeting seemed to go on forever although we did read an interesting chapter about a woman who’d spent so much time by herself that her only prevalent relationship was the one she had with her dildo she named Thor. She was a loner because she was a plus sized woman and the town where she was from saw that as a disgrace to be a big person, this made her unsuitable for marriage. As a result her toy became the only man in her life for years because no one wanted her. For a moment it felt like something inside of me was struck like a huge bell. This sad woman in the story sounded just like me, almost too much like me. The further we got into the story the sadder it became, no one treated her like a real person, even the ones that sympathized with her didn’t do anything to help her because she wasn’t considered beautiful. But there was a silver lining in the clouds by way of a tall handsome stranger that came to town that every woman thought that they were suitable for. Every woman in town threw themselves at him, hoping he would choose them. While he did bed a few of those women, he never resolved to marry any of them because there was nothing about them that was special enough for him to want to be with them. It wasn’t until the main character bumped into him that he saw something in her that no one else saw and he fell in love with her. As a result she didn’t need her dildo anymore because the man of her dreams had finally come, and as an added bonus the guy happened to be rich so she never wanted for anything ever again.
Why can’t my life be that interesting? Why can’t my prince charming just walk into my life and sweep me off into my happy ending? Cause right now I’m stuck in the middle of the story still getting poked at. I guess the universe heard me because as the book club came to a close Sharae decided that she wanted to hang around and mingle so she could have some type of network with all of the newcomers that showed up tonight. This left me all alone with nothing else to do but explore the sex shop and all of its novelties. The first thing of course was the rows and rows of dildos and vibrators that were lined across the wall. Every color that you could think of was standing before me, and when I say that I’m not exaggerating there were purple ones, green ones, tan ones, and even camouflaged decorated ones were on the shelves. There was one in every size, and it was more than enough to make event he horniest person blush. To the left of me there was nothing but wall to wall pornos, each had a different subject ranging from several fetishes to wild obsessions. But what caught my eye was the one thing that I never would have thought would be a preference for some consumers…fat girl porn. In this case they called it BWWs or big beautiful women. I had no idea that fluffy girls even did porn, some of those girls were even larger than me, I mean way larger than me. As surprised as I was, I was also kind of impressed by it. There was a market for women that looked like me, and it gave me a sense of hope that I wasn’t an old maid yet and I could find someone that liked me enough to be with me. Just as I reached over to grab one, Sharae called my name and signaled for me to come over. It just so happened that Austin from Austin was standing right next to her. I wish I could say I ran towards their direction, but then I’d be lying—I never ran anywhere.
Ok just play it cool, don’t do that stupid snort thing you always do when you meet a hot guy. Whatever you do pleeease don’t do it.
“Hey what’s up?”
“Miranda I want you to formally meet Austin, from Austin. We were just catching up and I told him that he just had to meet my new roommate from Minnesota.” He looked at me and smiled and immediately I was taken in by that pearly white smile. Suddenly without me realizing it, I did that stupid snort and watched Sharae’s face contort trying not to laugh at me. Austin just laughed along with me to cover my embarrassment.
“We talked for a quick second during the reading. But it’s nice to formally meet you, Miranda.”
“Nice meeting you too, Austin.”
“Ok,” said Sharae` “I have to run to the restroom for a moment, so Austin if you could keep her company until I come back that would be great.”
I knew what she was trying to do. She was leaving the door open for Austin and me to break the ice and possibly get something going between us. But that was crazy because she’d just told me that he was attached to some blonde bombshell with a superiority complex. Well it’ll be nice to play the game just for a little while.
“So it was nice getting to meet you again.”
“Nice meeting you too Austin.”
“Well you know where I’m from, but can I ask where you’re from?”
“St. Paul, Minnesota. The place is stuck in a time-warp. Needless to say when I moved her to go to USC my parents lost their minds and tried everything to keep me from the doom that was awaiting me in California.”
“Yeah my parents thought that moving here was going to change me somehow. They said it was way too liberal and thought that I’d be some pot smoking hippie when I’d come back for the holidays.”
“Oh my gosh—“
“Yeah my parents are really out there.”
“How old are you?”
“I’ll be twenty in a few weeks actually. You?”
“I’m twenty two, but some people tell me I come off a little older looking than that.”
“What made you start coming to this book club?”
“Well originally my girlfriend wanted to expand my mind and dragged me down here. But I grew to like it after a couple of visits and started coming down here on my own. We’re broken up now, but I find myself coming down here a lot just to learn a few things about sex you know.”
“Why did your girlfriend stop coming?”
“Hmm, well at first it was because her schedule at school was a little hectic. But now we’re broken up so she decided that it was best that she stopped coming.”
Oh so he’s single then? Thanks a lot Sharae!
“How come your boyfriend didn’t bring you down here himself?”
Oh my gosh is he flirting? I think he might be flirting, what do I do? What do I do? Just be honest, you’re single. Tell him!
“I’m actually single at the moment, just hanging out. It’s my first time here because Sharae wanted to show me around. I mean I’ve been here for over a year now but I never really got to know the city.”
It was something about being around him that made me feel comfortable and able to talk freely. He was very nice to me and I couldn’t take my eyes off of those beautiful teeth. Gosh his hair was so shiny that I could totally see myself running my hands through his short locks.
“Well you know when you were reading the book I thought you were awesome. You have a really great speaking voice. Do you do any public speaking?”
“My major is in Theatre so I’m used to projecting and acting out things.”
“Cool. I used to do theatre when I was in high school, musicals and all of that. But now I major in philosophy and minor in biology.”
“Wow you’re really smart then.”
“Yeah, I guess so. Oh, actually I think there’s a party that you might enjoy coming to.”
“Really? What kind of party?”
“Just a regular party with some friends and frats around the campus, just a few drinks and some music, nothing serious. I think you’ll enjoy it.”
Oh my gosh seriously? He’s inviting me a party? Wow this is it, a real party and I don’t have to do anything for it.
Sharae was a slick devil. She’d planned this out carefully because it’d been about ten minutes at this point and she still hasn’t come out of the bathroom. I’m not sure that leaving me hanging though was a good thing to do at this moment. I was hypnotized by the sight of this guy and who knows what I�
��d be willing to say. I really need her to come out of there and be my life line here…
Omg, oh my god his eyes are gorgeous! There are all twinkly… it’s so sweet.
I liked the fact that this really hot guy was standing in front of me treating me really nice, especially since there weren’t any guys in the last year that had been so gracious. But then again, I could have been reading entirely too much into it and maybe he really was just inviting me to a party. Either way it would be a great way to get out of the house, so I guess I will have to go and make the executive decision to just say yes.
“Okay. do I need to bring anything?”
“Just bring that beautiful smile, or and you can bring Sharae too if you want.”
“Great, when it is?”
“Friday night at 8:00 is perfect, and if you give me a pen I can give you the address, Or if you’d like to give me your number I can text you the address later.”
Give him your number! Do it, that way he can just text to see if he can learn more about you later on! Leave the door open!
“Sure, I can give you my number.”
Just as I was giving him my number Sharae appeared again after ten minutes of talking. Just like I thought she would, I gave him my number and hoped that he would text me tonight. Not that I was expecting him to like ask me out or anything, but I was certainly hoping that maybe I could get to know him a little better. I would have to fill Sharae in later about what happened, but I was hoping that this would be the key to everything that I’d been waiting for.
*******
After that long night I was a little exhausted but I couldn’t wait to tell Sharae the scoop about what happened after she “went to the restroom”. She told me that she’d been talking to him while I was sidetracked by the rows of vibrators and films. She said while speaking to him she found out that he was single after dumping skinny Minnie for cheating and she saw it as an opportunity for me because he had a slight thing for bigger girls like me. That was something that I really didn’t see coming. I never would have imagined that he was into more than just the girl he’d been dating. She told me that he actually begged her to introduce us so that he could try to get to know me a little better. According to Sharae, he’d noticed me the moment that he walked in and made a point to sit next to me to see if he could try to break the ice with me. I didn’t know what else to say, he intended to take my number the entire time just so he could reach out to me. This was completely strange to me because in Minnesota if a person really liked you then they simply came to your house and asked you out. Or, they simply called you up and said how they felt about you, there were no games to play and no run around. It was simple and easy.