by Aj Harmon
“Huh?”
“Well, there’s family and then there’s the opposite sex…and she looks at me, and Mark, and Matt and all the Lathem males as family. But you? You’re a man.”
“You’re full of it, and this is…is a very awkward conversation,” Adam frowned.
“Maybe I’m not explaining it well, but, trust me, she has feelings for you and if you hurt her, I’ll beat the shit out of you.” The tone of Derek’s voice had Adam understanding he was deadly serious.
“I’m not planning on hurting her. I’m planning on marrying her.”
“Oh.” Derek’s eyes widened. “Well, okay then.”
*****
Shelby had dressed and headed back to the bathroom to blow dry her hair. She’d taken her time, not purposely making him wait…well…maybe. With the large round brush she aimed the hair dryer at each section of hair and meticulously styled it into big wavy curls…stalling if she were to be honest with herself. When she had no other reason to be upstairs, she slowly made her way down to the great room, as the family was gradually starting to gather, their stomachs reminding them it was lunch time.
Salad and soup with Panini sandwiches were spread over the kitchen island, with mothers plating food for their children. The men stood in small clusters, patiently waiting for their turn to pile their plates high with the fuel that would keep them playing all afternoon on the beach; building sand castles, swimming, and some beach volleyball or football, possibly both.
With the children happily eating, and most of the women congregating with plates balancing on their laps on the massive sectional sofa in the great room, Shelby watched as Peter led the male assault on the kitchen. But mostly, she watched Adam. He was talking to Tim as they scooped up the spinach salad and piled it on their plates. She hadn’t made eye contact with him yet – there were too many people blocking any possible interaction. She sat in a chair by the doors that led to the pool. Janie and Maureen were sitting close by, engrossed in a conversation about planning another family cruise the following year, so she just watched Adam as he sat at the table and ate his lunch, unaware of her across the room and the battle her emotions were waging.
As she’d stood in the shower earlier that morning, the realization came that she’d longed for a partner, an equal, a soul mate. The knowledge that Adam was offering a long-buried desire had emotions bubbling to the surface that she was sure she’d rid herself of years before. At the ripe old age of fourteen, Shelby had made some life decisions that she hadn’t questioned once…until last night.
She didn’t hate men, although she had good reason to, but she was wary of most of them and never allowed herself to be in any situation where she might be made to feel vulnerable. She didn’t criticize marriage, although she’d decided it would never be for her, and she knew many couples, especially Katy and Mark, who were deeply in love and had made it a successful institution. She didn’t ridicule motherhood, even though she knew, without question, that she would never have a child, and was genuinely grateful to the Lathem women who trusted her with their children, giving her an opportunity to rock a baby to sleep and play dolls and build Lego spaceships, time she truly treasured. She had never put herself in a situation where she’d questioned her resolve…until now.
20.
Possibility
It wasn’t on purpose, but somehow Shelby and Adam’s paths hadn’t crossed ‘til late afternoon. The men had played football on the beach and Shelby had been roped into going into town shopping with several of the women and a few of the children. By the time they returned, the afternoon was almost gone and it was time to think about dinner preparations.
A tradition at the Lathem vacation home was what Christopher called Garden Movie Night. Matt and Bob had constructed a pulley system to hoist a white screen into the air at one end of the lawn, allowing the family to lay on pillows and blankets and watch a movie in the lush garden after the sun had set. Christopher had reminded his father while on the beach earlier in the day that they had yet to enjoy the family ritual on this trip. “Okay,” Matt had agreed. “Tonight, then.” He and Bob had spent the better part of an hour rigging up the screen and hauling the sound system from the storage room to the garden and Adam had offered to help running wires for the speakers.
“Shelby?” Janie called through the great room. “Would you please run these out to Matt?”
Happy to help, Shelby left the little girls playing Candy Land on the floor and took the pliers from Janie and headed through the French doors, around the side of the house to the lawn area designated for movie watching. Spotting Matt crouched in front of a speaker, she handed him the pliers. He looked up at her with confusion in his eyes.
“Janie said you needed these,” she explained.
To the left of Shelby, a movement caught Matt’s eye. Adam! Nicely done, Janie. He was impressed with his wife’s prodding skills, even though he didn’t actually approve of her meddling. Okay, I’ll play along. He stifled a grin. “I think Adam needs them.”
“Oh, right,” Shelby replied, unaware of the scheming that had taken place in the kitchen, and now in the garden. She walked over the green grass to where Adam sat attaching wires to the back of a stereo receiver. “Here,” she said and offered him the tool in her hand.
Adam looked at the pliers and then up to Shelby. “And I need those, why?”
Shelby shrugged. “Your mom said to bring them out and Matt told me to give them to you.”
“Oh, well, thank you, then,” he said as he took them from her and placed them on the ground beside him. After a moment or two of silence, he asked, “Do you know what movie the kids have picked?”
“The girls want Tangled and Joseph has the Cars Blu-ray in his hand and is refusing to put it down, so I’m thinking that one just might be the winner,” she smiled.
Adam chuckled. “Probably. How was your trip into town?”
Shelby sighed. “I know that women are supposed to like shopping, but, I just don’t get a kick out of it like everyone else. Although I did find a couple of things that I ended up buying.”
“Like what?”
“A swimming suit and a sarong.”
“We’ll have to go swimming then so you can wear it before we head home.”
Shelby smiled. “I think that can be arranged.”
Adam finished plugging in all the speaker wires to the back of the receiver and turned it on to test it. As each speaker came to life, the set-up was complete. “I do believe we are ready for the Lathem Garden Movie Night,” he grinned.
“You didn’t need the pliers?”
*****
“We should draw straws,” Nic repeated. “It’s the only way it’s going to be fair.”
“But if Dad wins, we’ll be watching an ancient John Wayne movie,” whined Tim.
“And if Sophia wins, it’ll be anything with Daniel Craig in it,” Ben teased his wife.
“That’s better than a Jane Austen movie,” Matt chimed in. “And we know if Janie wins that’s what it’ll be.”
“Just get the damn straws,” Peter interrupted.
Mark jumped up and rummaged through the kitchen draws ‘til he found some wooden skewers. Snipping one so it was considerably shorter than the others, he gathered them in his hands and headed back to the adults, each pulling a straw from the cluster he held tightly in his fist.
“This is a ridiculous way to choose a movie,” Maureen muttered as she took a skewer from her son. “Damn!” she frowned as she pulled out a long one, knowing her choice of Breakfast at Tiffany’s was now out of the running.
By the time all the skewers were picked, it was Rory who’d won the right to select the movie the adults would watch after the children went to bed.
“Oh, God knows what he’s going to pick,” sighed David. Matt and Paul muttered in agreement, suddenly not very excited at the prospect of watching a movie under the stars.
Rory, however, was gleefully jumping around announcing to everyone that he’d won,
as if they didn’t already know. Andrew shook his head, his lips pursed. “My bet is that it will be English,” he said. “And Jane Austen is still definitely on the table.”
*****
The kids were wired. Chaos ruled as dinner was coming to an end. All children had to be bathed and ready for bed before movie night could begin. It was one of the few times Joseph had gone willingly into the bathroom, still clutching the Blu-ray tightly in his hands.
The kitchen was tidied and the dishwashers loaded and started. Mark and Matt began the task of carrying pillows and blankets out to the garden. Adam collected a couple of wicker chairs from the patio for his grandparents and carried them to the lawn, Maureen advising him when he got too close to the bushes….or the gate…or any of the flowers. Safely arranged at the side of the lawn, Peter and Maureen settled in with an iced tea and a folded blanket to use if it became chilly.
If you were going to sit in a chair, it had to be positioned off to the side of the lawn so that those lounging on blankets and pillows wouldn’t have their view obstructed. Sophia and Nic, too pregnant to sit on the ground for very long, opted for chairs, along with Matt and Janie, but everyone else brought bundles out with them to spread on the grass and make themselves comfortable.
At the rear of the garden, a small wooden fence separated the lawn from the herb garden and Adam decided it would make a great back rest, so he pulled a couple of cushions from the sofa in the pool house and arranged a comfy little spot that he graciously offered to share with Shelby. She accepted and settled in next to him with a bowl of popcorn, a bag of M & M’s and two cans of Coca Cola.
“We make the perfect pair,” Adam grinned. “I claimed our spot and you provide the refreshments.”
“This is quite comfortable,” Shelby admitted, as she sat on the quilt Adam had laid down and settled back against the pillow.
“Your comfort is my number one priority,” he smiled, and meant every word.
As everyone knew he would, Joseph won the right to pick the movie. Cars, it would be. Even though Isabelle and Amanda all but cried because they wouldn’t be watching Tangled, once the movie began, everyone settled in for an exhilarating race with Lightning McQueen and Flo, Mater and the rest of the gang.
The sky shone brightly with billions of stars overhead and in the dark of night, children fell asleep one by one, heads resting on dads’ laps wrapped in blankets. As the ending credits began to roll, parents whispered to each other as sleeping babies were to be carried into the house and put to bed.
Shelby watched as husbands and wives sent silent communication back and forth to each other as children were gently lifted into loving arms and carefully moved from the garden into their beds. The scene was brilliantly choreographed, with each father moving gracefully through the gate without any traffic jams and not one child stirred from their peaceful slumber. There rose in her an odd wistfulness. If she wasn’t careful, the impregnable barrier she’d built around her heart would be at risk. The stirrings in the depth of her soul…the beginnings of envy she felt as she watched the blissfully happy little families all around her were threatening her peaceful existence.
It’s not that she didn’t want a family, she just couldn’t risk screwing it up, and she was sure she would. How could she not? Her destiny was to be alone. It as the safest way to be. Yet, the picture in front of her made her heart feel a yearning she had held at bay…’til this very moment.
*****
“Eat Pray Love,” Rory announced once all the children were in the house.
“No,” was the consensus of the group. Not even the women wanted to watch it.
“Fine,” he muttered. “We can watch my number two pick, but I am not compromising any further!” He messed around with the laptop hooked up to the projector and the screen exploded with color as the movie began. The red velvet curtains instantly gave it away.
“I love this movie!” Shelby declared.
“Me, too!” exclaimed Sophia.
“What is it?” asked Katy.
“Only one of the best films ever made,” Rory explained. “Nicole Kidman and Ewan MacGregor…two of the best actors of our generation!”
“Star Wars?” asked Mark.
Beth all but fell off her chair laughing. “No, silly. It’s Moulin Rouge!”
“A chick flick,” Matt groaned.
“I’ll give it ten minutes and then I’m going to bed,” Peter grumbled.
“Hey. I’ll sit through it if it means my wife is in a generous mood when it’s over,” David grinned and kissed Lindsey on the cheek.
“Shhhhh,” Rory hissed. “It’s starting.”
As promised, fifteen minutes into the movie, Peter and Maureen announced they were retiring for the evening. They were not enjoying the movie and it was after their bedtime anyway. Tim helped them through the dark ‘til they were safely in the house and then returned to snuggle with his wife. When Rory paused the movie thirty minutes in, because he needed to use the bathroom, Derek and Tyler stood and said they’d decided to head into town.
“There’s gotta be a club or somewhere we can go,” Tyler yawned, obviously bored with the movie selection.
“Anybody wanna join us?” Derek asked, looking right at Adam.
“I will!” Alex accepted the offer.
“You certainly will not!” Ben exclaimed.
“Aw, come on, Ben. Please?”
“No!” His voice told Alex there would be no more discussion.
“I’m gonna go and play a video game then,” he pouted.
“Fine,” Ben said, hiding a grin from his step-son.
“You wanna go?” Tyler asked Shelby.
“No, thanks. I’m gonna stay and watch the movie.”
“Me, too,” added Adam.
Derek smiled, a knowing smile and gave Adam the slightest of nods. The two men said goodnight and left the garden. As Rory returned from the house, he brought a bucket with cans of assorted beverages for everyone and settled back down at Andrew’s side and the movie continued.
But over the course of the next hour, silently, several couples left the lawn, Matt and Janie the first to tiptoe out of the garden and up to their bedroom, hand in hand. Tim and Beth left next, with Ben and Sophia closely behind them.
As the hour got later, a slight chill was in the air and Shelby was grateful that Adam had brought an extra blanket, as she wore just shorts and a tank top. She grabbed it at the corner and pulled it across her legs.
“Cold?” Adam whispered. She nodded. He scooted a little closer, wrapped his arm around her and pulled the blanket over both of them, giving her the warmth of the quilt and his body. It felt so natural to have her in his arms. He knew it was where she belonged. Within minutes he heard her steady, deep breathing and realized she’d fallen asleep. Content, Adam watched the movie with a smile.
Even the intense critique of the film by Mark and Katy as the credits rolled didn’t wake Shelby. She was curled into Adam’s side and out for the count. As several members of the family offered their assistance to help him get her up to her room, Adam shook his head and shooed them away, leaving them in the garden alone.
He kissed her on the top of her head, enjoying the sweet smell of her shampoo and tilted his head back and gazed at the stars. Her head rested on his chest, over his heart, his arm wrapped around her protectively, his hand resting on her hip. He could stay like this forever, with the woman he loved at his side.
He ran his fingers through her hair and pulled the blanket over her shoulder. The he settled back, closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.
*****
The sun rose early and with it, the birds. Chirping happily high in the trees, Adam’s eyes fluttered open, grateful for the bush next to the house that was giving his eyes some relief from the bright sun glaring down on him. At some point, he’d kicked off the blanket, the morning dawning warm.
However, Shelby was no longer curled beside him. She was nowhere to be seen. Rubbing his neck and stretching
his back, Adam scrambled to his feet and yawned. He picked up the pillows and blankets and walked to the pool house. There wasn’t a sound coming from the house. It was still very early.
Falling onto the bed, Adam closed his eyes and quickly fell asleep.
*****
Shelby watched Adam shuffle into the pool house, still half asleep, from behind the curtain in the great room. She’d awoken just a few minutes earlier to find her hand caressing his chest. It had felt wonderful and had scared her wide awake.
The last few days had sent her into an emotional tailspin and every time she attempted to check herself, there was something else that unbalanced her…made her question the decisions that had managed to keep her sane all these years.
Being held by Adam had given her an overwhelming sense of calm and safety…something she sorely lacked most of the time. Yet, she’d slept more deeply in his arms than any time in the last twelve years, and her dreams didn’t wake her in a panicked sweat.
She’d already acknowledged her feelings for him. And he’d certainly left no doubt as to how he felt about her. However, that wasn’t enough for her to allow the protective walls she’d spent years erecting be torn apart, leaving her vulnerable.
But it was Adam…and Adam would never hurt her, of that she was sure.
The voices behind her had her turning around to see Mark and Katy bouncing down the stairs. They were dressed for a run.
“Morning,” Katy smiled. “You’re up early.”
Shelby returned the smile. “Just beat you. I’m gonna make coffee. Want some?”
Mark shook his head. “No thanks. We’re off for a run on the beach. Wanna join us?”
Shelby chuckled. “How many times have you asked me to join you on a run? And how many times have I accepted?”