by J. H. Croix
Chapter 17
Finn
I hung up the phone and leaned back in my chair, snagging my cup of coffee and taking a sip. It was cold. No surprise as my morning had been quite busy. Ray Sutton’s lawyers were in a flurry, demanding records, arguing over petty details and filing a request to have the no contact order lifted. I’d been busy communicating with Lynne Sutton and her attorney about it, and coordinating with Becca. The aggressive stance taken by his legal team wasn't a surprise given Ray’s current prominent role in the election and the family values image he was trying to project. I was hoping Becca would persuade his attorney that dragging the case through the public eye with more hearings wouldn’t help his image. Time would tell.
I stood and headed to the break room to grab another cup of coffee. My phone buzzed, and I pulled it out of my pocket. I'd missed getting texts from Jana the last few days. Ever since the weekend, it had been radio silence from her. This should have been fine with me, but it wasn't. I sensed she was getting skittish, and I thought I knew why. Things were intense, far more intense, than I’d expected. Intense enough that I found myself shying away from thoughts about her. Two nights together, and I hadn't wanted to leave Sunday.
Instead of a text from Jana, it was a text from my ex. Fuck. Every so often, Kristen would text out of the blue. I couldn't say I knew why, but here she was again.
Hope this text finds you well. I was wondering if you'd like to grab coffee some time.
WTF? Staring down at my phone as I rounded the corner into the break room, I wasn't thinking when I spoke aloud to my phone. “No. I wouldn't like to have coffee sometime.”
I heard a laugh and glanced up to see Eli sitting at the table. “You don't want to have coffee then?” he asked.
I flashed a slightly embarrassed grin, deleting Kristen’s text without replying and stepping to the counter to pour a fresh cup of coffee. “I'll have coffee with you. Just talking to my phone.”
“Who won't you have coffee with?” he asked slyly.
“Kristen. Every now and then, she texts me. No idea why.”
Eli rolled his eyes. “Come on, dude. She's fishing.”
“Fishing for what?” I countered as I slouched into the chair across from him.
“My guess is she's not hooked up with anybody else steady. Every time you hear from her out of the blue, she's in between guys. She's got serial monogamist stamped all over her,” he explained.
“What the bloody hell is that?” I asked with a laugh.
“People who always commit. But when things aren’t working out, they break up and then call all of their exes because they don’t like to be out of a relationship.”
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”
Eli shook his head slowly. “Nope. Not kidding. I don’t know though, just throwing that out there. Maybe she just wants to have coffee.”
I considered the timing of when Kristen had reached out to me in the past. “Eh, you’re probably right.”
After Kristen and I had first broken up, the ripples in our circle of friends had kept me a little more informed than the last few years. I hadn’t gone digging, but I had known she tended to go from one committed relationship to the next. Now that I thought about it, she did tend to reach out in between guys.
“Bloody relieved I dodged a bullet with her,” I offered.
My mind spun to the weekend with Jana. It was far more intense than anything I’d ever experienced with Kristen. We had been young when we first got together. I was a highflying footballer with my eye on the pros. We were both in university, and sex was hot and heavy. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I hadn’t loved her. I had. It was just a different kind of love, less deep and less intimate. The second that thought passed through my mind, my heart thudded. Hard. I shifted quickly in my chair.
Eli looked over at me. I moved the topic to work, easy to talk about at the moment with Ray Sutton’s case keeping the media busy. “How’s your day been?”
“Eh, busy with paperwork today. Guessing you’re tied up with Sutton’s case. How’s his ex holding up?”
“He’s putting pressure on her with trying to get the no-contact order lifted. She's pretty stressed out about it. I think it'll hold, but it's a nuisance,” I explained.
“It will. Sutton’s gonna keep Becca on her toes though.”
“That he will. She doesn't mind though, she loves the fight.”
We chuckled, and then a few other people filtered into the break room. I stood to return to my office, pausing before I walked off. “Any luck finding a place yet?” I asked.
“Working on it. You didn’t mention Shari was hot as hell,” Eli replied, referring to the realtor I’d recommended to him.
I chuckled and rolled my eyes. “She’s a professional. Treat her like one.”
“Always,” he countered with a wink.
“Well, when you find a place, let me know if you need help moving.”
With a wave, I left, narrowly avoiding a collision with two women from human resources whose arms were filled with Christmas lights. They’d been decorating the station around everyone as we worked.
Returning to my office, my mind spun back to my conversation last week with Eli about his break up with Beth. I considered his explanation that he’d broken up with her, if anything, because it didn't make him all upset. Before Kristen dumped me right before our wedding, I would've said I wanted to settle down. After that, I got cynical about commitment.
Unlike Kristen, I wasn’t a serial monogamist. She seemed to be on the hunt to find the magic man with whom she would want to settle down. I’d shrugged off that possibility. Or so I’d thought. Yet with Jana, for the first time, I wanted all kinds of things. I wanted more of how I felt when I was with her. The feeling between us was almost a stealth intimacy with its own power and force.
***
The following afternoon, lo and behold, Kristen showed up at my door when I’d just walked in from finishing an early shift.
“What the fuck?” was exactly what I said when I opened the door and saw her standing there.
Kristen ignored my greeting. “Finn! I decided to just stop by when I didn't hear back from you.”
I stared at her, gathering my thoughts. “Hi Kristen,” I finally managed by force of habit.
I was so thrown at having her show up, she walked right through the door while I was standing there numbly.
“Kristen, what are you doing here?” I asked.
She glanced around my townhouse. “Finn, I can't believe you found this place.”
Her gaze swung back to mine. I looked at her, taking the moment to absorb her appearance. Her blonde hair was pulled back into a sleek knot, and her nails were perfectly manicured. She wore black slacks and a fitted white blouse with black flats. She was classy as ever. I could objectively see she was beautiful, quite lovely in fact. She looked as if she had lost a little bit of weight. Her cheekbones stood out more sharply than I recalled. I felt nothing in response to her. Her blue eyes were pretty, yet they didn't have the gleam Jana’s almost always held. Kristen’s bland, neutral presence felt monochrome in contrast to Jana’s bright, bold presence.
I managed to smile politely, recalling her last comment. “Thank you. It's a nice place.”
I slid my hands in my pockets and rested my shoulder against the wall by the door. I wasn't going to shove her back out, but I wasn’t going to invite her to stay either.
As though she read my mind. “You’re not inviting me to share tea,” she said with a little giggle. “I used to love your British tea thing.”
I arched a brow. “British tea thing?”
“Yes. You like tea. Men from here don't drink tea as often.” She paused and looked around. I sensed if I moved even an inch away from the entryway, she’d take herself on a tour. Glancing back to me, she commented, “You haven’t even decorated for Christmas.”
I simply shrugged. “So I haven’t. Haven’t found the time. What brings you here, Kri
sten?” I elected to entirely ignore her attempt to cajole me into offering her some tea.
She adjusted her purse on her shoulder and clasped her hands in front of her. “I haven't seen you in a while. I thought we could get together and have dinner.”
“Kristen, we broke up. You canceled the wedding. I'm all about being friendly, but I don't see any reason to get together and have dinner.” I couldn’t fucking believe she’d showed up and wanted to have dinner.
She sighed, cocking her head to the side. I think she thought she was being cute. I didn't really know.
“Oh come on, Finn. That's water under the bridge. Let's try to be friends,” she cajoled.
I was, quite simply, irritated. Why she would think it made sense that I’d want to be friends was beyond me. I’d admit I’d become more cynical about relationships after our break up, mostly because I didn't think they were worth the bother. I supposed I could chalk that up to Kristen, but I didn't particularly want to be friends. She was a part of my life at a time in my life when my feelings were more shallow and my focus was more outward. As I stood there with Kristen, Jana sashayed into my thoughts—how alive she felt, how bursting with energy she was, the drive she carried was so powerful.
With Kristen, well, I really felt nothing right now. I could call up the old feelings I’d once had. They were warmer and softer. They definitely didn't grab me by the balls, hold my heart in a vise and make me wonder if I was losing my mind. Most definitely not.
Yet, I was a gentleman, so I managed a polite smile. “It’s nice to see you, Kristen. I hope you're well, but let's allow that water to stay under the bridge.”
She rested her hand on her hip. “Geez, not too friendly are you?”
“Kristen, let it go. I wish you the best. Are you seeing anyone right now?” I asked.
She rolled her eyes. “I was, but it didn't work out.”
“I'm sorry to hear that.”
So Eli had nailed it. She was in between relationships. I beat back the urge to state the obvious.
She was quiet, her gaze still expectant. “Do you miss playing?”
“I still play here and there. Obviously, I’m not pro, but I help coach a local team and catch games when I can.” There was a local football league, excuse me soccer, here in the States, and I was fairly active with it.
Kristen nodded and reached for the door handle. Pausing, she turned back and let the truth drop. “You never told me about your trust fund,” she said.
I arched a brow. “Pardon?”
“You get a trust fund when you're thirty-five, and you never told me about it,” she clarified.
I gave my head a little shake, my irritation at her sudden appearance spiking again. “I didn’t even know about it until after you broke things off. We were young and in university,” I added as though she needed me to remind her of that detail.
It was taking most of my discipline not to swear at her and shove her out the door at this point. Why the hell was she asking about money?
“Yeah, but we were engaged, and you never even mentioned it,” she explained, her brow furrowing.
Of all the things for her to be affronted about. Bloody hell.
“Kristen, we were twenty-four when you broke off our engagement. It's been years. I didn't even know what I stood to inherit until I was twenty-five. I don't really see why that matters at all now. You knew what my father did, and you knew he was well-established financially. Does this perhaps have something to do with why you’re here?” I asked, my voice tight.
“I just find it odd you didn't tell me about it.”
“Not bloody likely I could tell you something I didn’t know about. Again, I don’t see how this matters.”
Two bright red spots appeared high on her cheekbones.
“I'm not sure why you're nosing around my personal finances,” I added.
She huffed, actually huffed. “Whatever. I talked to your sister, and she mentioned it,” she muttered.
“You talked to Sarah?”
Kristen nodded, her hand gripping the door handle tightly.
I was going to have to remind Sarah I’d rather she kept her bloody mouth shut.
“Well, now you know. I don't see what it has to do with us being friends, or anything. Please carry on with your day,” I said.
I reached past her, nudging her hand off the door handle and swinging it open. I gestured for her to depart. She paused for a second, the furrow between her brows tightening as she opened her mouth. I could tell she was ready to keep arguing about whatever the fuck she wanted to argue about. I was having none of it.
“Have a good afternoon, Kristen.”
I moved to close the door, and she hurried out. “God, Finn. Have some manners.”
I slammed the door behind her, giving the smooth wooden surface my finger. Bloody good riddance. Why, oh why did I have to wonder again about the timing of our break up? I didn't think about it much, but after the car accident, I was a mess—physically and emotionally.
She hung around for the recovery. I didn't think she enjoyed it, but then I wouldn’t have expected anybody to enjoy it. She was gone once it became clear I wouldn’t be able to return to play quickly enough to be considered for the pros. Truth be told, I could've rededicated myself and maybe, just maybe, gotten back to full speed. That alone would've taken too long to be viable in the pros.
I couldn't help but wonder if Kristen had known about my trust fund back then if she’d have stayed. I was bloody relieved she hadn’t known. Though she’d managed to piss me off, the feeling dissipated quickly. She was long gone, and I was damn grateful.
My phone vibrated on the kitchen counter. I strode through the living room to the island and spun it around, laughing the moment I saw the text. Jana had resumed her texting habits the last day or so. The theme seemed to be silly animal pictures. She’d just sent one of a pig wearing a tutu.
I pondered whether Jana would be the type of woman for whom money would make or break a commitment. I knew without a doubt, it wouldn't for her. It just wasn't the kind of person she was. Emotion knotted in my throat, and I quickly picked up my phone. Swiping her text to the side, I called her. She answered on the first ring.
“Hey what's up?”
“Yesterday was Thursday, and today is Friday,” I said, referencing a text earlier this week. “I think we should have dinner tonight.”
There was a weighted silence. I could actually feel the wheels turning in her brain through the phone.
“Okay, let’s. Where do you want to meet?”
“How about I cook?”
“You cook? Thank God I'm sitting down.”
I chuckled “Where are you sitting?”
“At my desk at the office.”
“I think maybe I should come see you at the office. I don't know where you work though.”
“Oh, you should,” she said, her voice filled with glee. “I work with Zoe. I think you should come to the office right now in fact.”
I needed no further instruction. “Text me the address. I'll be there as soon as I can.”
Chapter 18
Jana
I leapt up from my desk, galvanized at the knowledge Finn was on his way over here. I hurried over to check Zoe's office, insanely to make sure she wasn't there when I knew perfectly well she wasn't. She was gone for the rest of the day at court and then meeting Ethan to go to one of his games. I raced into the bathroom, sifting my fingers through my hair and giving myself a once over. I was looking a bit worse for the wear with my skin paler than usual and my eyes puffy from poor sleep. I’d had a long week at work, and I’d finally turned in my law school paperwork to finish next semester. As such, I’d started studying at night.
I splashed water on my face and swiped lip gloss on. My hair would have to do as it was. I had one thing on my brain—Finn. Well, make that two. Finn and sex. My attempt to keep my distance had only left me longing for him. That should’ve given me pause, but it didn't. I gave my head a shak
e and left the bathroom. Once again, I checked the door to Zoe’s office, needlessly closing it. She wasn't here and wouldn't be here, but it felt funny leaving it open. I then hurried to tidy my desk. Yet another entirely needless task. I seriously doubted Finn would care about the state of my desk.
I had no idea how much time had passed since he’d called, but my body was humming in anticipation. I heard footsteps in the hallway outside of our office door. The office I shared with Zoe was in central downtown Seattle on the upper floor of an office building. We had a nice view of the harbor. In the reception area, I had a curved desk that faced the front. Behind that, I had a small office with a window that shared the pretty harbor view in the distance. I didn’t actually spend much time in there, but I used it when I needed to buckle down and work on court documents. We didn't get many drop-in clients, so it wasn't necessary for me to be at the reception desk all the time.
The footsteps came to a stop outside our door, my heart rate pausing along with them. I couldn't tell whether it was Finn or not. All I could see was a blurred shape through the frosted glass blocks surrounding either side of the main door. After a moment, Finn stepped inside. One look at him and my pulse lunged and my breath caught. He was in uniform, and I could've melted on the spot. The navy looked quite good on him, almost matching his eyes now that I thought about it.
“Hi,” I said, my voice coming out breathy.
His mouth hitched at one corner, a grin stretching slowly across his face. He shut the door behind him. I was standing at the corner of my desk, and I zipped across the room, locking the door behind him and leaning against it with a grin. He turned to throw a puzzled look in my direction.
“Hi,” I said again, repeating my greeting and trying to will my pulse to slow down.
“Hello,” he returned. “How are you?”
“Great,” I managed.
He glanced around the office. Beyond the main door with frosted glass on either side lay the entry area. It was open and airy. We’d decorated it in soft grays and muted blues. My desk was a rich mahogany, curving into the wall facing the door. The bathroom was off to one side with a small waiting area to the other. There were several soft gray chairs with a low, circular table in front of them. The door to Zoe's office was beyond that.