by J. H. Croix
Georgia reached across the table, catching my hand and giving it a squeeze. “It’s okay to feel like this. When we love someone, sometimes it’s hard. You and Cade had it pretty easy back then. Nothing ruffled the surface, so it seemed easy. It’s never easy even when it’s good. Things come up and you have to get through them. You two are way overdue on this one and both of you have some feelings bottled up. Just give it time. Okay?”
I took a slow breath, the warmth in Georgia’s words filtering through the reflexive anxiety I felt. By no means did I feel great about where things were at, but maybe, just maybe, Cade and I would get through this.
***
The following evening, I stared across the table at Earl. I’d managed to be polite, but he was pissing me off. At this point, I was wondering how I’d ever even thought he was anything other than an arrogant jerk. I practically had skid marks on my tongue from keeping my mouth shut. The only thing keeping me at the table now was the fact I figured his pride had taken a hit and that was why he was being an ass. I’d give him this dinner and that would be it.
That said, I was annoyed enough, I couldn’t help but needle him.
“So, fishing trip, huh?” I asked.
I didn’t want Earl, but him so easily bouncing back after I left him behind, well, it was sand in an old wound. A wound that had nothing to do with him, yet everything about our failed relationship was like a neon sign pointing to those old feelings of insecurity. Aside from Cade, no man ever made me feel as if I mattered much. To Earl, I mattered so little, I could dump him minutes before our wedding and he shifted gears so fast it was like a spotlight on how little I meant.
Earl looked across the table at me and shrugged. His mouth hooked at one corner in a grin. As if it was funny somehow.
“Amelia, you left. What the hell was I supposed to do? You’ve had a bit to cool down, so let’s be real. I don’t know what happened, but we had a good thing. Let’s talk things over and get back to where we were. I think you just freaked because…”
My blood was boiling. A rushing sound muted the voices around me. I gave my head a shake. Earl reached across the table and grabbed my hand. I shook it off, drawing back.
“Earl, we’re not getting back to anything. I meant what I said that day. I never should’ve said yes.”
He stared back at me, his eyes flat and hard to read. Lucy’s comments about his pride were becoming more and more obvious.
Chapter 18
Cade
I rolled my truck to a stop in front of Wildlands. Wildlands Lodge was a wilderness guiding and fishing resort on Willow Brook Street, which ran perpendicular to Main Street with Swan Lake a stone’s throw away. Willow Brook had been named after a small brook running out of the mountains in the distance. It ran alongside its namesake street before meandering its way to Swan Lake. Wildlands had once been just a bar and restaurant. When the town was feeling left out of the oil boom in the eighties, the owners turned their sights on the slew of people moving to the state and the tourists following them. Wildlands was a destination wilderness lodge now, bringing tourists willing to pay crazy money for fishing and guiding in the area.
It was a modern style wilderness lodge with cedar siding and gorgeous stone chimneys flanking either end of its main building. The hotel portion was in the back with docks adjacent to Swan Lake. I made my way inside, a sense of familiarity washing over me. I’d spent many a night here with friends and with Amelia. The restaurant was packed, crowded with locals and tourists. I scanned the crowd and threaded my way to the bar in the back. The interior had a modern woodsy feel with polished wooden tables scattered throughout and photographs of the Alaskan wilderness and various fishing photos lining the walls.
I caught sight of Beck over in the corner with a few other guys whom I assumed were firefighters. After weaving through the crowd, I slipped into the chair Beck patted beside him.
“Hey man, it’s packed here tonight,” I offered in greeting.
Beck flashed a grin. “This is the way it is all summer now. Ever since they finished the addition to the lodge here, it’s crazy busy.”
“When did they do that?” I asked.
“Two summers ago. Added another one hundred rooms. It’s nuts. Anyway, let me introduce you. Guys, this is Cade, the new foreman.” He gestured to a man with dark blonde hair and bright blue eyes. “Levi Phillips is on your crew.” Levi tipped his head in my direction. “Then we have Thad Mason and Jesse Franklin here. These guys are with the crew too. You might remember Thad, but Jesse’s a transplant from Fairbanks.”
I said my hellos and looked to Thad. “You were a few years behind me in high school, right?”
Thad nodded and twirled his beer bottle in a circle on the table. “Sure was. Just young enough you guys could ignore me,” he said with a chuckle. He had dark brown hair and eyes to match.
Beck took the bait and punched him lightly on the shoulder. “Dude, we weren’t ignoring you. We just had eyes for the girls back then. You know how it goes.”
I glanced to Levi. “Good to meet you, man. How long have you been with the crew here?”
Levi leaned back in his chair. “About a year. I did my training in Arizona, but I’m from Juneau. When a position opened up here, I jumped on it.”
Conversation moved on with me getting updates on everything from the new equipment at the station to Beck’s latest ladies drama when he accidentally, according to him, dated two women he hadn’t known were friends. I was midway through my second beer when I happened to see the flash of Amelia’s hair. Her amber hair glinted gold in the lights from above. Even across the crowded room, I felt her presence like a jolt. I couldn’t help but crane my head. The second I did, I regretted it. Earl Osborne was seated across from her.
I saw red and did my damnedest to shackle the irrational jealousy coursing through me. I forced myself to look away, colliding with Beck’s too-perceptive gaze. Beck arched a brow, a knowing grin curling one corner of his mouth. I shook my head. Beck’s grin faded quickly with a slight nod. Beck might enjoy teasing, but he wasn’t an asshole.
A waitress passed by us, and as much as I wanted another beer to bury the jealousy chewing me up inside, I declined. The last thing my anger needed was enough alcohol to make me stupid.
Bar noise hummed around me. I made a strong effort to keep my cool, but it was dicey. I thought I was good enough to get my ass out of there, so I said my goodbyes and stood, tossing a twenty on the table to cover my portion of the tab. I started to make my way through the crowd when my eyes landed on Amelia and Earl. My barely in check jealousy flared when I saw Earl leaning across the table, trying to reach for her hand.
I went from angry to on fire and shouldered my way over to their table. Amelia’s eyes whipped to mine. “Come on,” I said.
Earl glanced up, his gaze annoyed. “This is none of your business Cade. I know you and Amelia have some history, but…”
Earl made the mistake of reaching for Amelia’s hand again. She drew back, her eyes flashing. “Earl, I already told you. We’re done. Period.”
“Amelia, you don’t get to…”
I grabbed Earl by his shirt, yanking him up out of his chair. No easy feat, given Earl was close to my height and plenty strong. But I was beyond angry. My jealousy was now mixed with raw anger at seeing Earl try to push Amelia on anything. “Fucking listen to her. You don’t get to make her talk to you anymore.”
Earl’s eyes were wide now. Whatever he’d thought about us before, realization appeared to be dawning it might be more than old history. “Oh, you think you can just show up in town and call the shots with her? That’s fucking bullshit. We were getting married. You’re the one who screwed around on her.”
I drew back and drove my fist into Earl’s face. I didn’t hear a damn thing through the fury buzzing like static in my brain. Earl stumbled back. “What the fuck!”
Before Earl had a chance to punch me back, Amelia stepped between us, shoving him to the side. Next thing
I knew, Beck was at my side pulling me away. “Back off, man. No one needs this,” he murmured, his voice low at my shoulder.
The sounds around me broke through my fury, and I glanced over to see Amelia in Earl’s face. I couldn’t hear what she was saying, but it was obvious she was pissed. Through the jumble of the next few minutes, Beck dragged me out of the way. Likewise, Earl was pulled out of the way by his brother Dan. I leaned against the wall in the back hallway leading to the restrooms with Beck standing across from me.
“Here’s hoping Earl doesn’t decide to be more of an ass and press charges,” Beck said with a slow shake of his head. “Be great to have your dad dealing with this.”
My dad was Willow Brook’s chief of police. I knew if Earl decided to be an ass, my dad wouldn’t stand in the way. I loved my dad, but I could count on him not treating me special. I closed my eyes and ran a hand through my hair. “Fuck. Wasn’t thinking back there.”
Beck chuckled. “Nah, you weren’t.”
He paused long enough, I opened my eyes.
“So, she’s not your girl, huh?” he said with a slow grin.
I leaned my head against the wall and shrugged.
Footsteps sounded in the hallway. I rolled my head to the side to see Amelia walking our way. My heart thudded, and the lust I couldn’t seem to turn off around her hit me like a bolt.
She reached us quickly, her long legs eating up the distance between us with ease. Her honey-amber hair fell in tousled waves around her shoulders with her matching eyes glittering bright. Her cheeks were flushed, and she looked, well, the only way to put it was angry. Her cowboy boots struck the hardwood floor, the sound echoing around us as she came to a stop. She wore jeans that hugged her legs, those legs I wanted wrapped around my waist. Atop her jeans, she wore a bright blue silky blouse, unbuttoned over a fitted tank top. My eyes were drawn to the tempting curves of her breasts, and I wanted nothing more than to strip her bare and forget everything else.
It didn’t matter that I’d gone and made a mess by punching her very-recent-former fiancée in the middle of everything. I forgot everything but how much I wanted her. Beck’s gaze bounced from Amelia to me and back again.
“Well?” Beck asked calmly.
Amelia glanced to him. “Well, what?”
“The obvious—is Earl gonna make this more than it needs to be?”
She shook her head. “Oh you mean press charges? No. He’s pissed, but he’s not a total ass. I told him he was too pushy with me and needed to back the hell off.”
Beck nodded and pushed away from the wall. His eyes landed on me. “I’m done here. Stay out of trouble for the rest of the night, okay?”
I nodded, swallowing against my frustration at the whole damn mess. Beck strolled down the hallway, leaving us alone there. Amelia looked over at me, her eyes still flashing with anger.
We stood there in the hall, no more than a foot apart. In seconds, the air around us hummed. I had one thing on my mind and that was forgetting the seven years of nothing between us and finally having what I wanted like I’d never wanted anything in my life. I’d had seven years of casual encounters with women and hadn’t thought I’d ever want anything more. I also hadn’t thought anything could be like what I’d once had with Amelia. What I’d underestimated was the power of seven years of messy feelings swirling into the raw desire I felt for her. It was lust on octane.
Whatever might be passing through her mind, I knew what I felt from her. I reached for her hand, reeling her against me in a flash. She didn’t resist, her eyes whipping to mine. I could see the wild beat of her pulse in her neck as her eyes darkened. Her breath came in rough gusts, while my heart thudded so hard, it almost hurt.
“Are you gonna tell me we shouldn’t do this?” I asked, my voice coming out gruff.
I knew she could feel my cock, rock hard and nestled right against her core. It was impossible to miss. I’d always loved how we fit together. She was tall enough to meld against me, her curves everywhere I wanted them to be.
She shook her head, just barely. That was all I needed. I tunneled my hand into her hair and fit my mouth over hers. Our kiss went wild instantly with our tongues tangling roughly. I lost sense of anything other than the feel of her against me, pouring my anger, my jealousy and too many years of missing her into our kiss. Footsteps coming our way barely broke through the haze in my brain, but she broke free, her head thudding against the wall behind her.
I hadn’t even realized I’d spun us around and pressed her into the wall. One of her boots was curled around my calf as I flexed my hips into the cradle of hers. I could feel her wet heat through the two layers of denim between us. Her eyes locked to mine—wild and dark. She swallowed. “We can’t lose it like this here,” she whispered.
Chapter 19
Amelia
I stood there with Cade’s cock pressing against my core, sending sharp spikes of pleasure shooting through me. I could barely catch my breath and all I knew was I didn’t want this to end. I didn’t even care that someone was walking down the hall toward us while I was tangled like a vine around Cade.
Cade’s dark green gaze held mine for a beat, and he slowly eased his grip on my hair, his thumb feathering across my pulse as he dragged his hand away. “Well, we could,” he replied, his gruff voice sending shivers over my skin. “But as much as I’d love to lose it here in the hallway, let’s save it for later. Come on.”
He stepped back, instantly leaving me feeling bereft. I missed his heat, his hard muscled body pressing me into the wall, and the feel of his mouth on mine, kissing me as if the world was about to end and the only way to stop it was to kiss me. He curled his hand around mine and tugged me behind him, heading toward the restaurant. Blessedly, I didn’t recognize the man walking down the hall and was relieved when he turned into the bathroom. I planted my feet, leading Cade to glance behind him.
“Let’s go out the back,” I said, gesturing behind me. “There’s a door around the corner at the end. After our little scene out there, I’d rather not go that way.”
His mouth curled at the corner, one of his devastating, dangerous grins. “Good point.”
Heat spiraled through me as he turned and quickly strode the other way. Earl was so far in my rear view mirror, I could hardly believe what I was doing. Tonight was supposed to be a polite dinner with Earl where I explained why I’d broken things off with him—more calmly than I had when I dashed into the rainy afternoon at our not-wedding. I’d underestimated Earl’s pride. Not for a second did I believe he wanted me any more than he ever had, but then I doubted he’d ever collided with the pulse-pounding, body-melting desire mingled with shocking intimacy that I felt with Cade. Earl just wasn’t the kind of guy to feel much of anything that strongly. He was friendly and comfortable. I didn’t wish him ill, but when he’d started to argue the point with me, I realized he didn’t get it and thought he had a claim to me.
Before I knew it, Cade had stormed over and lifted Earl out of his chair. I’d like to think I was immune to that brand of alpha masculinity, but I wasn’t. At least, not when it came from Cade. He rounded the corner at the end of the hall and shouldered through the door, his hand holding mine firmly as he strode quickly across the parking lot behind the lodge. He stopped abruptly, leading me to collide with him as he turned back to me.
He didn’t miss a beat, flashing one of his devastating grins and sliding a hand over my bottom. My breath went shallow the second I felt the heat of his cock against me. “Did you drive here?” he asked, his words a murmur against my lips.
I shook my head. “Uh-uh. I walked from my office.”
He held still for a beat, and then spun around again. I’d been expecting a kiss and his tease sent the flames licking inside higher. We were inside his truck in a flash, his hand burning against my thigh as he spun out onto the road.
“Where are we going?” I asked, just when his hand stroked in between my thighs.
If he meant to push them apart, it was
entirely unnecessary as my knees parted for him in reflex.
I bit back a moan when he cupped my mound, the subtle pressure against my clit through the denim nearly sending me over the edge. That’s how bad I was with him. The moment I let the walls down around everything I felt for him, my control frayed so fast it was ridiculous. It wasn’t just about sex with Cade, it never had been. Yet, the chemistry burned so hot, it nearly singed me. Our intimacy fed the fire of desire between us, each notching the other higher.
“Your place,” Cade answered as he dragged his thumb across my clit.
I didn’t even try to hold back my moan, my hips arching into his touch. “Do you know…”
He came to an abrupt stop at a stop sign, his eyes whipping to mine. I felt branded by his gaze. After a beat, he nodded. “Even when I didn’t want to think about you, I did. You still out at the property we looked at before?”
I’d forgotten what it was like to have someone anticipate my thoughts. My heart squeezed and set off on another frenzied bout of pounding. I nodded, wrestling with the emotion coursing through me. Before I stormed out on the heels of that fateful morning, we’d been scouting around for a piece of property to build on when he came back from California. Cade had left town, and I’d held onto my anger as a shield against the hurt and pain. Irrationally, I’d thought I’d go ahead and buy a property we’d loved, thinking I wasn’t going to let him take everything from me. I’d built my own home there, determined I wasn’t going to let a broken heart stop me. I loved it, but there’d always been a rub, like a grain of sand in my shoe, at the memories of Cade and the dreams we once had.