After the Ending

by Lindsey Fairleigh

  I squirmed, attempting to dislodge his hold on me, but I might as well have been fighting against iron restraints.

  “Oh, Red. You’ll never beat me,” he whispered near my ear.

  In all of my wriggling, I’d managed to maneuver my right leg between both of his. I’d expended quite a bit of energy flailing about, but I had just enough left. With a grunt, I brought my leg up against his groin—hard.

  Groaning, Jason rolled off me and curled into the fetal position on the lawn.

  Jack ceased his enthusiastic prancing and jumping to crouch in front of Jason’s face. He sniffed and nuzzled the man until he received some weak pets.

  I sat up and reached out to touch Jason’s shoulder. “I’m sorry, Jason! But…you told me that’s what I’m supposed to do if a guy has me pinned to the ground.” He didn’t respond.

  “Jason, I…Are you mad at me?” I asked weakly, feeling a little sick.

  When Jason finally sat up and faced me, he was smiling, if a little sickly. “No. That was perfect. I wasn’t sure you had it in you to really hurt someone, but now I know.”

  “Oh. Um…thanks?”

  Jason stood, brushing off stray bits of grass. I did the same, still breathing heavier than normal from the exertion—and, possibly, from the excitement.

  “I’d say you’re warmed up,” he said. “Let’s wake everyone with some target practice.”

  We walked in silence, and as we neared the makeshift shooting range, I froze in horror. Three of the cardboard targets had been painted, each with a different blood-red word.

  SHOOT.

  YOURSELF.

  DANI.

  It was Cece’s doing—it had to be. Unbidden, tears welled in my eyes, and I blinked them away angrily. I won’t let her make me cry!

  “This needs to end,” Jason growled, turning back toward the house. He made it three steps before I planted myself in front of him.

  “Jason, don’t you dare!” He stepped to the side to go around me, and I mirrored the motion.

  “Dani. Move.” His voice sounded hollow, determined.

  “No!” I yelled. In my best impression of my angry Irish grandma, I placed my hands on my hips and demanded, “You’re not going after her because of this. Can’t you see that’s what she wants you to do? She and John and the rest of her idiots are probably waiting for you right now. If you go after them…then what? We all get in a huge fight and end up killing each other? What happens to the rest of us if they take you out? Jason…you…your calm logic…that’s the only thing holding us together. Safety in numbers, remember? We need you. I need you.”

  His jaw clenched at my last statement.

  “You’re staying here, with me, and finishing this damn training session!” I tried my best to loom over him, which was difficult considering Jason was about a foot taller than me. I took a step toward him.

  Miraculously, he stepped back.

  Pretty sure he would follow, I brushed past him and returned to the shooting range. I hoped he didn’t hear my gigantic sigh of relief. If they kill him because of me, I don’t know what I’ll do.

  Jason stood by my side for the next hour and coached me until the hateful words were riddled with enough bullet holes that they were no longer legible.

  Date: December 22, 9:00 AM

  From: Danielle O’Connor

  To: Zoe Cartwright

  Subject: It’s getting old…

  Zo,

  So, I kind of had a run-in with Cece this morning. Is there such a thing as passive-aggressive bullying (I feel like I’m in elementary school saying “bully”)? If so, that’s what she’s doing. She’s such a bitch. Anyway, Jason woke me super early to get in some extra how-to-be-violent training. When we got to our little make-shift shooting range, the words “SHOOT YOURSELF DANI” were written on the targets. Jason was ready to march off and end things then and there, but somehow I managed to reign him in. Who would’ve thought?

  I know you probably disagree with my decision to stop him, but I think they (Cece, John, and company) are trying to get Jason to attack them. Because, you know, that way they’d have a good excuse to “depose” him as group leader...maybe even kill him. I had a good reason, you see? I had to keep him safe. It’s hard though—I don’t know how much longer I can stand this.

  On a totally unrelated note, I had another dream with MG last night. This one was different, foggy. No literally, I was surrounded by fog. It was definitely not your normal, chilly day fog either. But that’s not important. From all around me his voice kept saying, “learn.” Learn what? And MG never even made a real appearance. My dreams are getting so odd and vivid. Sometimes I dread going to sleep because I know I’ll wake up troubled and confused.

  Anyway, we’re about to leave for Fort Bragg, where we have another two-day stop—this time for Ky and Holly (Army Ranger chick…the only other one besides Chris). We’ll be a three-hour drive from Bodega Bay, but I’ll have to wait three more days to get there. This is so frustrating!

  By the way, I really don’t like the sound of those two new guys you mentioned. Please be careful around them. At least you seem to have found a friend in Harper, and he can help keep you safe with his super kung fu military training. And he’s hot. So did you? Reconsider his offer, I mean...? Don’t leave out the juicy details, Zo!

  Ciao,

  Dani

  I walked around the driveway, studying my new surroundings. The house sprawled around me, enormous, beige, and boxy, looking more like a modern stucco apartment building than a family home. Dense chunks of forest surrounded the house, breaking up the fields of tall grasses.

  I meandered over to Ky, who had grown up in the outrageous place, and asked, “Are you sure about this? I bet we can still go somewhere else.”

  Smiling, Ky placed his arm over my shoulders and pulled me into a side hug. “Nah. I had to come here eventually, and I’d rather stay at my house than another random place. Sometimes it just feels right to come home. You know what I mean, D?”

  “Yeah,” I agreed. I want to go home too. My desperation to drive the three more hours to Bodega Bay was overwhelming, keeping me on the verge of tears.

  Ky tightened his hold on me and whispered, “It’s worse here—like the mother of all thunderstorms is building up around her, and I don’t know what to expect. All I know is that it’s gonna be bad.”

  Goosebumps pebbled my skin, and a chill seeped into my body.

  Before I could respond, Chris appeared on my other side and slipped her arm around my waist, making us a sweet little trio of comfort. “What’re you kiddos doing over here?” Seconds after she touched me, my dread simply evaporated.

  “Just talking about home,” I replied wistfully.

  Chris leaned the side of her head against mine. “We’ll just have to be each other’s home.”

  Ky laughed softly. “Are you ladies gonna cry? ‘Cause if you are, I’ll just be on my way,” he teased, but he didn’t move an inch.

  “Ha! As if you’d ever give up the chance to cozy up with us.” Chris gave him a friendly slap on the gut.

  “I hate to interrupt this…whatever it is,” Jason cut in from behind us, “but I need to talk to Dani. Alone.”

  Ky’s arm retracted from my shoulders like he’d been burned, and he hopped a yard away. “Right. Of course.” He ducked his head and hurried off. Weird.

  Chris’s arm tightened around my waist as Jason stepped in front of us. “You too, Johnson. And take Jack,” he said.

  She let go of me and stepped so close to him that their shoes nearly touched. “If you make her cry, I’ll punch you,” she threatened.

  “Really?” Jason’s eyes strayed to my face. “Looks like you’ve already done a pretty good job of it. Does that mean I get to punch you?” I hadn’t even noticed the wetness streaking down my cheeks.

  “Those are happy tears, you ass,” Chris snapped before stomping off with my dog. Chris and Jason’s friendship was…strange.

  “Dani, I know you�
�re probably angry, but—”

  I stepped closer to him, and he tensed. “Angry?” I hissed. “You think I’m angry? Try pissed. Try frustrated to the point of needing to scream. Grams, your dad—who knows who else—might need us right now, and we could get there in a few hours. But no, we’ll sit here for three days while they might be dying.”

  Reaching out, he grabbed my shoulders tightly. “Fuck, Dani, I know! Don’t you think it’s the same for me? Don’t you think it’s killing me to be so close and not be able to help them?”

  “I don’t know!” I practically yelled. My gaze dropped to the flagstone driveway beneath our feet. “How could I possibly know what you’re feeling? You never talk about it. For all I know, you don’t even care.” I met his eyes, pleading. “Please, Jason, just let me go with Chris. We’ll find a car and get down there tonight. We won’t take any of the group’s supplies, and you can stay here with everyone else and honor your agreement.”

  He swallowed and opened his mouth, but no sound came out. Intently, his eyes searched mine.

  “Please, Jason,” I begged, my chin trembling.

  Suddenly, he pulled me against him in a tight hug and rested his cheek atop my head. “I’m sorry, Dani. I can’t let you go. I’m so sorry.”

  An avalanche of tears poured down my cheeks, accompanied by hiccups and moans. Jason hid me in his arms as my sobs played out, sparing me the shame of breaking down in front of everyone.

  Once my tears had dried, he walked me up to the room I was sharing with Chris and settled me on the bed. He sat on the edge, reminding me of the incident that morning—how good his fingers had felt on my skin.

  “But my stuff,” I mumbled, hoping to keep his mind from the same topic mine had drifted to.

  He pointed to a corner of the room where my pack and duffel bag sat. “Chris already brought everything up.”

  “Oh. Where is she?” I asked. I sounded like a lost little girl.

  “I think she’s helping with dinner. Dani, I—”

  “I know,” I interrupted. If he stayed much longer, tried to comfort me some more, I’d start crying again. “Can I just be alone for a little while?”

  “Sure,” he replied and leaned in to brush a stray curl out of my eyes before standing. “I’ll send Jack up.”

  “Thanks.”

  When Jason opened the door, we were both surprised to find my dog sitting patiently in the hallway. He trotted in and hopped onto the bed beside me for some much-needed cuddling. As I curled around him, I heard the door shut quietly.

  While I lavished attention on Jack, I felt something odd attached to his collar. I lifted my head so I could see it and found a folded piece of paper wrapped around the leather band. Curious, I unwound and unfolded the paper. Feminine, bubbly handwriting covered the page.

  Dani-

  You have a very important choice to make tonight. You need to leave. If you’re still here by sunrise, we’ll kill Jason and Chris, and then you and your dog. If you tell them about this note, they’ll come after us and we’ll defend ourselves. Any spilled blood, like my sister’s, will be on your hands. If you and your mutt leave before morning, we’ll continue on peacefully. Without you, there won’t be any more conflict. Make the right choice. Go.

  Jack whined as the note slipped from my grasp. A single train of thought echoed through my mind. I can’t lose him.

  20

  ZOE

  From my makeshift desk in the mess hall, I could feel Jones’s mood—black and bitter—as he strode in. The stark, empty dining room was suddenly charged with an incessant hum, like mosquitoes trapped in a megaphone. I had the sudden urge to flee, but I didn’t move.

  Meandering over to my table in the corner, Jones smiled and asked, “Zoe, my dear, how’re you holding up?” He leaned his back against the wall mere feet from me, crossing his arms and ankles nonchalantly like we were friends catching up on old times. Creep.

  We were indebted to him for letting us stay on base, so I knew I needed to keep my snide comments to myself as much as possible. I wasn’t about to schmooze with him though. “I’m fine, thanks,” I replied. “What can I do for you, Captain?”

  “What are you working on?” he asked a little too curiously, ignoring my question. He stole a glimpse at my computer screen, but I closed the lid before he could read my email to Dani.

  Although I couldn’t see his exact thoughts, I could feel his emotions prickling my skin ominously, leaving unwanted goose bumps in their wake. Alarm rang in my mind, but I ignored it—the group was down the hallway if I needed them.

  “So tell me a little bit about yourself, Zoe.” Jones paused briefly. “What happened to your family? Are they in Massachusetts? Is that where you’re from?” Although his questions were harmless enough, his emotions felt malicious. I didn’t trust him.

  Seeing my wariness, he feigned offense. “Oh come now, my dear. We’re practically family now.”

  My eyes narrowed. Realizing I was displaying my distaste for him too openly, I turned away and began packing up my computer. “I haven’t heard from them,” was all I said.

  “Do you have a history of mental illness in your family?”

  I froze. Why the hell would he ask me if my family is crazy? My thoughts lingered on the word ‘crazy’, and a feverish hatred suddenly burned through my body. Fucking Dave told him. Did he tell anyone else? Harper and Sarah would’ve talked to me themselves if they knew…

  My first instincts were to deny everything and to claim Dave had misinterpreted my meaning. I’d been drunk and only quasi-coherent; everyone could attest to that. But Jones had approached me alone for a reason, and my instincts told me to keep quiet. Something wasn’t right—Jones was a snake trying to poison me with his words.

  “What are you getting at, Sir?” My tone was more annoyed than I’d anticipated.

  Jones smirked sadistically and reached for my hair like an affectionate father. He stopped before touching me, and after hesitating for a moment, lowered his hand. “You have a little spunk in you. Dave said you were different.” Pausing, he waited for his words to ignite some sort of response. When my granite expression remained, he continued, “Perhaps you’re a little too different for Dave. He thinks you might be a…what’d he call it? Oh yes, a Crazy.” He snorted with laughter. “But, I’m sure you already know that, don’t you?” he asked, searching my face for recognition.

  “I’m not sure what you mean,” I simpered, wondering if batting my eyelashes would be taking it too far. Having this guy as an enemy wasn’t making me feel warm and fuzzy.

  “Don’t be coy, girl,” Jones snapped. “Telling me everything will only help you. I guarantee it.”

  Yeah, right. His presence alone was threatening. I could feel his agitation; he was wound up and ready to burst. He considered himself superior to me and was pissed off that he had to placate me—a lowly woman—to get the answers he sought. I wasn’t sure how I knew that exactly, but his emotions were growing stronger by the second. His aggression thrummed through me, and my heartbeat quickened in panic.

  “I think you misunderstand me, Captain. Perhaps you can explain what you want from me.”

  Full of self-satisfaction, he said, “You wonder why I’m not completely freaked out like your friend, Dave. I’ll tell you a little secret.” He leaned in closer. “You’re not that special. I’ve seen others like you. I’ve killed people like you.”

  I pretended to be indifferent as I finished packing up, but inside, my heart pounded like it was trying to break out of my chest. It took everything I had to appear calm. Who the hell is this guy? How many people has he killed? He said he’s seen others like me…

  Curiosity overpowered caution, and against my better judgment, I dilly-dallied. I could feel beads of sweat forming in my cleavage. “What ‘others’ are you referring to? I’m dying to know,” I taunted unwisely.

  “That doesn’t concern you.” Jones sat down next to me, gripping my arm firmly to keep me sitting. “What you need to worry
about is what your friends will do if they find out you’re a freak. We got rid of ours.” He let his words sink in, then continued with false kindness. “I only want to help you.”

  Jones’s concern was enough to make me vomit, and apparently my disgust was blatantly displayed on my face. He sighed in irritation. “Look, let’s cut the shit.”

  “Finally,” I grumbled.

  Instantly, he was furious; it radiated off of him. “If you want me to keep quiet about your secret, you better do the same for me.” His tone was harsh, and his words promised that really bad things would happen to me if I disobeyed. “I’ve got a good thing going on here, and I don’t need anyone poking around where they don’t belong.” He jabbed his index finger against my chest.

  For a brief moment I wondered what Jones was hiding, but then an image flashed in my mind; it was of one of the women I’d met when we’d arrived. She was naked in his bed, scared and crying.

  Without warning, his calloused hand grabbed the back of my neck roughly, and my body tensed with fear. Low and venomous, he said, “I know girls like you. You always get in the way.”

  In that moment, I saw his plan to kill me. I saw his combat knife slicing into my side and then into my chest. A gun would be too loud, bringing too much attention too quickly. I didn’t know if he was threatening me with the horrific image of my death or if he was merely contemplating how he’d do it, but it didn’t matter. I couldn’t remain near him a moment longer.

  “Get your hands off me!” I demanded, but his fingers constricted. I muffled a shriek as my head snapped back.

  Jones’s face was inches from mine, and I could smell his rank, sour breath. His eyes bored into mine as he hissed, “You see, girl, I’m a Captain in the United States Army, and I have zero tolerance for bullshit. Don’t even think about getting close to my girls. Don’t cause any problems or ask any questions. I won’t tolerate it!”