by Lucy Ivey
I scanned the wide eyes of the people in the room as they began to back away from the scene of the fight. Joe’s eyes found mine. He looked lost. Sorry for what he had done. The marks on his face were darkening. I hoped he was okay, but before I caught my breath I saw Justin slowly trying to rise to his feet. I ran over to him and knelt down beside him.
“Are you okay?”
“Karley, get back!” Justin yelled as he pushed me out of his way to get to his brother. I stumbled and fell into one of the guests who balanced me before I could fall to the ground.
“What is wrong with you?” Justin yelled at Joe.
Joe looked at his younger brother and spit out a mouthful of blood on the floor.
“What?” he asked nonchalantly. The sorrowful look in his eyes was gone.
“What the hell happened?”
Justin’s shirtless body and unbuttoned pants were a dead giveaway to everyone what we were doing before we were interrupted. I didn’t care. I wanted to make sure he was okay, but from the look in his eye—a look I had only seen once before—I knew to stand back.
“I don’t even know who these guys are!” Joe laughed.
“Then why in the fuck were you fighting them?”
He shrugged his shoulders. “Why not?”
Bewilderment covered Justin’s face.
“What? What did they do?”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing?” Justin asked, a laugh of disbelief escaping from his lips. “Nothing?”
He was fighting back rage to go after Joe. Tonight he was so angry, he might have overpowered his brother. He didn’t. He never would.
“If anybody knows these assholes, take ’em home now!” Justin yelled out to everyone standing around.
“They came with us, Justin,” a guy I recognized from the resort said quietly.
Justin looked at the guy and walked over to him.
“Well, get ’em outta here, Nate” he said putting his hand on Nate’s shoulder.
“Sorry, man.”
“Me, too,” Justin said walking away.
He felt bad for fighting, especially for no reason other than his brother’s drunkenness. But he would do it again. He loved Joe more than anyone else.
Nate helped one of his friends to his feet. Everyone watched in silence as they all walked out of the house.
“Party’s over!” Justin announced loud enough for everyone to hear. “Get out!”
No one moved right away. Motionless, we all watched him walk back up the stairs and disappear into my room.
“You better go after him, Karley,” Gray said. “I’ll keep an eye on Joe.”
I looked over at Joe. He was staring at me with no emotion on his face. I wanted to punch him myself. I wanted to make sure he was all right before I went upstairs. I did neither. I let go of Beth’s hand and walked up to my room.
I closed the door behind me and sat beside Justin on my bed. His head was in his hands. If he looked up at me, I would see tears in his eyes. He didn’t. I leaned toward him and kissed his shoulder.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” he said calmly.
I didn’t know what else to say. I sat beside him, silent. The hammering in my heart was softening. Its beat slowing.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
There was certainty in his eyes.
“For what?”
Why was he apologizing? He hadn’t done anything wrong. He was protecting his brother. I understood. It’s what they did for each other.
“For running out on you. For losing my temper. For fighting those guys.”
He didn’t apologize for putting his hand over my mouth or pushing me toward the ground, as if he didn’t realize he’d done either.
I ran my fingers through his disheveled hair. He laid his head on my shoulder and wrapped his arms around my waist. When he pressed his head deeper into me, I felt his body shaking slightly.
“You have to protect him,” I whispered. “He’s your brother.”
“That’s what I’ve always done,” he growled. “I’m so tired of it.”
“He needs you,” I whispered.
He took my face in his strong hands and confessed, “More than you know.”
The throbbing in my head wasn’t as intense as it had been fifteen minutes ago, but the room was still whirling around me in a slow, nauseating motion. “You’re still a little drunk, aren’t you?”
“I think so.”
I knew so.
He pulled me back into his arms and kissed the top of my head.
“Trust me, Karley, you don’t have to worry about Sarah anymore.”
I stared up at him with confusion. Why would he bring her up now? Why was she on his mind? Had Joe told him about my conversation with Ryan? I didn’t think they had been alone together after we came back in from outside. I know Ryan wouldn’t have told him that he told me. How could he have known? Did he hear us talking about her outside? Was he outside too and I just didn’t see him?
Everything was spinning again. I pulled myself away from him and rubbed my temples.
“What about you?”
“What about me?” he asked.
“How are you feeling?”
“I haven’t had any alcohol tonight,” he confessed. “I’ve been too busy keeping an eye on you. Making sure you don’t get yourself into any trouble.”
His chest shook beneath me. He was laughing. I didn’t care about Sarah anymore. Whatever happened between them was over. He just told me I didn’t have to worry about her. I needed to trust him.
“Well, then,” I teased falling back on my bed. “Maybe we can finish what we started?”
He climbed on top of me. With his legs straddled on my sides, he slid my dress off and began tracing his tongue from my lips down my stomach.
“With pleasure, Miss Woods,” he whispered. He restrained my wrists in his hands and continued making a trail down my body. At the lace waistband of my panties he stopped. “I’ll finish where I left off when I get back.”
“What? Where are you going?”
He was already standing at the side of my bed.
“I need to check on Joe.”
“He’s fine. Please come back to bed!” I pleaded.
“In a little bit,” he promised. He tucked me under the covers and kissed my lips once more before everything faded to black.
His silhouette in the doorway blocked the light of the hallway behind him. The house was silent. Everyone must have left. I wondered how long I had been asleep. My eyes were still unable to focus but at least the pounding in my brain was gone. He remained motionless, staring at me from across the room. He must have thought I was still asleep.
“Come here,” I whispered removing the covers from my body and sitting up. I was still dizzy but I wanted him near me.
Hesitating, he took a step inside and closed the door behind him. For the first time, the moon wasn’t shining bright. I could barely see him walking toward me. Finally, his shirtless body sat on the edge of my bed but he didn’t look over at me.
I crawled up behind him and began kissing his back. Bumps immediately rose under his bare skin. He was enjoying the touch of my lips across his body. I reached around and ran my hand down his chest. When I caressed him between his legs, he tilted his head back. Excited by the soft moans he made, I continued moving my hand back and forth with a slow, firm force. The sounds were new to me.
I continued firmly squeezing. With every massaging motion I made between his legs, the light moaning in his throat became more and more unbearable to resist. Unable to control myself any longer, I crawled around him and secured my legs tightly around his waist. He pulled me in closer holding firmly to my hips.
His hold was steady adjusting my body against his. I closed my eyes as he kissed my neck. His breath was heavy and warm moving slowly over my skin. He moved his hands up my back grabbing my shoulders from behind and pulling me back. His body stiffened under me sending a rush of excitem
ent throughout my entire body. I wanted nothing more than for him to be inside me.
I allowed him to move me in the directions he wanted, letting his lips trace over me again and again. When I bent my head down to kiss his lips … I could taste the alcohol.
I opened my eyes realizing I wasn’t kissing Justin.
I was kissing Joe … and allowing him to kiss me.
“What are you doing?” I froze inside his arms.
“Don’t stop, Karley!” he begged. His lips touched mine again. “Please, don’t stop.”
His voice was soothing. Pleading. I didn’t know what to do. His lips were soft and gentle but his hold was strong. He held tightly to me. I let him kiss me again, and as he did I could feel my body relaxing. I didn’t want him to stop. I pulled my lips slowly away from his soft bite.
“Why are you doing this?”
He pulled me to him again.
“Don’t you know how much I want you?”
His tongue traced my neck leaving a path for his lips to follow with his soft kisses.
“You don’t want me,” I whispered breathlessly barely pulling away from him again. “All of this is just a game to you.”
My words were baiting. I wanted him to tell me I was wrong.
“No, it’s not.” He pulled me back toward him with ease after his whisper. “Not with you.”
He leaned forward and began kissing me again. Trembling with every touch of his lips, I wanted to believe him. Something told me not to. I didn’t listen. At first I didn’t move. I thought about his words. Enjoyed his touch. Then, slowly, I started kissing him back.
I wanted him.
And I would let him have me.
His breathless sighs became low moans again as I pressed myself into him. It felt right, my hands on his face, my legs around his waist, the way he brought me closer into him. I lowered my hand and reached between us to unbuckle his pants, never letting his lips leave mine. The throbbing between my thighs was intolerable. Within moments, he would give me a new pain. I welcomed it. But then, I thought of Justin.
“We shouldn’t be doing this.” I continued to kiss him. “Please, stop.”
He didn’t. I breathed in his breath as I continued pressing my lips against his. I wanted to tell him again to stop—that what we were doing was wrong.
I didn’t.
Nothing else mattered anymore. Right. Wrong. I didn’t care.
I sank myself deeper into his lap feeling all my blood pulsing between my legs. I wanted him. His thick arms wrapped easily around my body holding me tightly. I rocked my hips slowly into him feeling the stiffness inside his pants growing with every move I made. I lifted my head back and gasped for air before I returned to his lips.
He picked me up with ease and quickly turned me over on the bed, sliding my panties down my legs with a rushing, impatient force. Looking over my shoulder, I watched him pull his pants down to his ankles before stepping out of them.
Standing at the edge of my bed, he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me back toward him. I wanted to watch everything he was planning on doing to me, but I had to close my eyes … and when I did, Justin’s face appeared. Immediately, guilt absorbed me.
This is wrong. Not like this. I can’t. Not like this.
“Stop … please.” I pushed myself away from him. “Wait! Stop! Please.”
He didn’t hold me to him. He released his arm from around my waist, and I scrambled away to escape him falling on the floor.
“I can’t.” I was breathless. Panting and sweating. “We can’t.”
I covered myself with the sheets that slipped off the bed with me.
He wiped his wet lips as he lifted his foot off the fallen sheet to let me have it. I leaned my body against the wall, waiting for his next move.
“Why?” he smirked running his hands hard down his naked thighs.
Justin.
“I’m sorry. I can’t.”
“Because of him?”
Anger laced his words.
“Yes … I don’t know anymore … we just can’t. Not like this—”
He put his head in his hands.
“Joe, you need to go.”
When he lifted his eyes to me again, there was desperation in them—or maybe it was hope. I couldn’t tell. I’d learned over the past few days he was good at concealing his true self.
“Do you really want me to go?”
No.
“If you want me to leave you alone, I will.”
I don’t want you to leave.
“But not because of him. I’ll go and I’ll leave you alone, but only if you don’t want me.”
I don’t want you to.
“You have to go,” I whispered.
He recognized my struggle of wanting something so badly that is right in front of you but not being able to have it. He identified with it.
“Is it because of him, or it is because if I kiss you again you won’t stop me?”
Yes. That was the answer to both of his questions.
“Please go … I should have never crossed the line with you.”
His flawless, naked body walked over to me. I wanted him to kiss me, throw me back on the bed, climb on top of me, then slide inside me. He didn’t. He put his hands on the wall beside my head.
“You only drew the line because you knew I would cross it.”
There was honesty in his words.
“Now answer my question.” His breathing was calm. “Are you sure you want me to go?”
He knew the answer but he wanted me to say it to him.
“Joe. Please.”
“Please what?”
His warm breath against my neck gave me a torturous pleasure. He ran his hand slowly up my inner thigh until he reached the lace of my underwear. His fingers teased me with their light tickling brush over my skin under the lace of my bra. I closed my eyes and let him touch me slowly.
“Tell me, why haven’t you ever told Justin about the things that have happened between us?”
My trembling body ached for him to continue touching me. My breathing became heavier anticipating his entry into me. It never came. He would make me wait. Beg him. I wouldn’t. Not tonight. This couldn’t happen between us.
“There’s nothing to tell,” I quietly lied.
His firm caress between my legs made me gasp. He knew I was lying to him. He liked it. I closed my eyes again, exhaling slowly at the pleasure of the anticipation it caused until finally his fingers penetrated, causing me to cry out softly.
“There is now.” My breathing quickened the faster his fingers moved. My entire body was now pulsing under his touch inside me. “There has been for a while now.”
He was right but I needed him to stop.
Stop. Please.
My mouth didn’t make the sounds my mind was telling it to, and he continued.
“You know you were supposed to be mine, not his.” His voice was soft, songlike as he continued touching me. I could have easily swayed to it had his words not echoed inside my head reminding me of his brother.
Justin.
“Please stop.”
“Karley—”
I had to gasp the air back into my lungs.
“Stop!” I pushed his hand back and tightened the sheet between my legs. His light eyes darkened with frustration.
“Get out of what? You or your room?”
My hot tears fell without warning.
“Please … just go,” I begged.
The long heavy sigh he released was full of disappointment knowing he would have to wait. He would. He was patient.
Without another word from either of us, he slid his pants back on and closed the door softly. He was gone. My quivering body slid to the floor and I began to cry. With every breath I took in, he was still there. I had to get his scent off me; it was driving me crazy.
The hot shower water fell against the top of my head and trickled down my body. I wasn’t sure if I was touching myself to get his scent off me
or to remind me of how it felt to have his hands on me. I could still feel his touch on my skin. Taste him on my tongue. See the honesty in his eyes when he begged me to believe him this wasn’t a game.
The shadow on the other side of the curtain frightened me. When I flung it open, Justin jumped.
“What’s wrong?” he asked taking off his pants.
“Nothing.” I caught my breath. “I didn’t hear you come in.”
“You’re not done, are you?”
A flirtatious grin formed across his lips. I shook my head slowly. I stepped back allowing him to step into the shower. His gentle smile pressed into mine as the water fell between our faces. I felt guilty for what I had done minutes ago. Thankfully, the trickling water running over my face made it easy to avoid his eyes and hide my falling tears.
“Where have you been?”
“I had to take your drunk friends home,” he said lightly pushing me back against the wall. His body blocked the water from hitting me.
“They didn’t wanna stay and Joe couldn’t drive them … not that they would want to be alone with him after that shit he pulled earlier. Well, I’m sure Gray wanted him to take her.”
He smiled at his comment. I didn’t. I was too busy staring at the four faint red lines running down his chest at an angle.
“What happened?”
He looked down and shrugged my question off as he wet his hair and face under the showerhead. The scratch looked like a defensive wound.
He noticed I was still staring at it.
“The guy I was fighting probably scratched me.”
The wounds didn’t look fresh.
He gently pushed my body back against the shower wall and held me in place with his left hand against my lower stomach.
“What are you thinking about?”
Joe.
“Did Joe know you left?”
“Yeah, I told him to keep an eye on you,” he whispered from his now kneeled position. The pressure of the water stung as it peppered my body.
“Why?”
His eyes narrowed with curiosity as he looked up at me.
“In case you needed anything.”
“I wish you had told me you were leaving.”
“Why?” he asked still looking at me with confused eyes. “Did something happen?”