Remember, It's Our Honeymoon

by Mairsile Leabhair

  “Me too, kid, me too. So tell me about your first?” The second those words left her mouth, Aidan was kicking herself. “Oh shit, oh shit, that’s not what I meant!”

  “It’s okay honey. I know you weren’t talking about the rape. But I do think we can save my story for another day.”

  “What? Why. It’s because of what I said, isn’t it?”

  Vicky yelled, “No. It’s because we’re about to go into some rapids!”

  Neither one of them had noticed the water becoming more turbulent until it was too late. The river had narrowed, the water had doubled and the rapids had tripled.

  “Fuck me!” Aidan quickly changed sides and began feverishly paddling away from the rapids. The cold splash wetted their faces as the pull of the current became stronger than Aidan could pull the oars against. Soon they were whitewater rafting. “Hang on!” Aidan gave up trying to reverse course, and instead used the oars to steer the boat through the fast-moving water as best she could.

  “If I wasn’t so scared, this would be fun!” Vicky yelled over the rushing water.

  “It’s okay, kid, these aren’t as bad as I first thought, just don’t let go though, okay?”

  Her fear alleviated, Vicky began enjoying the ride. As they came down from a swell, she even yelled out, “Wahoo!” much to Aidan’s delight.

  Once the water calmed down, Aidan began rowing toward shore. Stepping out of the boat, they looked around, realizing there was no one else in sight. It was a thick wooded area with a lot of underbrush, and no signs of civilization whatsoever.

  “No bars on the phone, so that’s out,” Aidan stated as she tucked the phone back into her jeans pocket, “Okay, we can do one of two things,” she said, “we can keep rowing downstream until we find someone, or…”

  “Or?”

  “We can camp out here tonight and make love under the Irish stars.”

  “Oh! That last one sounds positively romantic!”

  Aidan smiled, pleased with her bride’s choice. “Okay, I’ll gather some firewood, you look around for some food. Maybe you’ll find some berries. But don’t eat them until‒‒”

  “I know, I was in the 4H club in Junior High.”

  The two set about preparing their camp and just as the sun set, they snuggled together beside a crackling fire, next to the burbling river. The incandescent stars twinkled playfully for the lovers, as the creatures of the night began their musical interlude.

  “Baby, this is the life,” Aidan exclaimed, taking in a deep breath of the clean, cool night air.

  “I agree, I could learn to love this.”

  “Then let’s stay here. I’ll build us a hut and you can hang some curtains, just like when we were kids in the treehouse.”

  “Oh, Aidan, you’re such a romantic.”

  “Well, if I am, then I’m a romantic who’s completely serious.” After all the two lovers had been through, the thought of seclusion away from everything and everyone, was very intriguing to Aidan, and she could visualize a life where just the two of them lived off the land. How she wished they were stranded for good, like in a Robinson Crusoe story, and they never saw another human being for as long as they lived.

  Chapter Five

  It has been said that when one of the five senses suddenly goes dark, the other senses become more acute to compensate for it. Joyce was already beginning to experience this phenomenon. She noticed the food seem to taste richer, the smell of it more enticing, and the wine more full bodied. But it was her hearing that surprised her the most. She heard sounds she’d never heard before. She figured it was more the fact that she was forced to slow down long enough to hear them, than an actual increase in hearing. That was the scientist in her rationalizing the medical reasoning behind this new experience. Whatever it was, Joyce developed intolerance for the quiet solitude.

  “Ellen!” Joyce bellowed from her recliner in the living room.

  Ellen came rushing in from the bedroom, “What?”

  “Nothing,” she said with a grin.

  “Then why did you yell for me?”

  Joyce tilted her head in the direction of Ellen’s voice, “I just needed to hear your voice and uh…”

  “What is it honey,” Ellen’s stance softened as she knelt down beside her.

  “It’s just that the quiet is so loud. I’m probably being irrational, but could you just make some noise once in a while so I know I’m not in a vacuum?”

  “Oh, honey, and here I was trying to be extra quiet so as not to disturb you.”

  Joyce laughed, “And that’s exactly what is disturbing me. Listen, baby-doll, don’t tip-toe around me, okay?” She reached out her hands and Ellen held them in hers, “Just be yourself, that’s all the medicine I need.”

  Ellen kissed her on the forehead, “You got it, sweetie.”

  “Do you hear that?” Joyce cocked her head to the side so she could hear better.

  “What, honey?”

  “The kids playing in the park. There’s something so sweet sounding about giggling kids, don’t you think?”

  Their apartment was on the tenth floor with windows that did not open. Ellen was skeptical so she went to the window and looked down at the park below. Sure enough, there were children playing, and though she couldn’t hear them, she could tell, they were laughing and giggling, like Joyce had said. She looked at her with wonderment. It was like Joyce was transforming into a whole new woman, one that Ellen found very intriguing. If only she could convince Joyce that everything was going to be all right.

  “Honey, I’m going to the laundry room to get some laundry done, will you be okay?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be here, sitting in my recliner, doing nothing.”

  But after a few minutes, Joyce felt lonely again, and craned her head toward the laundry room to listen for her wife. She couldn’t help but smile when she heard Ellen singing. She could hear the smile in her wife’s voice, as Ellen made up lyrics about doing chores. That’s even sweeter sounding than the children, she thought to herself. And then another thought occurred to her about what this must be doing to Ellen. What would her future be like with a blind woman to take care of? For that matter, Joyce wondered what her own future would be like without her eyesight. If she couldn’t perform surgery then she couldn’t see a future for herself at all.

  ***

  “Well, Yvonne?” Virginia looked at her pointedly.

  But Jerry interceded, “Mother!”

  “That’s the only way she’s going to get my money, Gerald.”

  “She doesn’t want your stinking money! Neither of us do!” Jerry said as forcefully as he could.

  Yvonne looked at the aggravating woman sitting across from her and swallowed her mounting anger, only because she was Jerry’s mother. The woman was dripping in jewels, wearing an expensive fur coat, even though it wasn’t cold enough to need one, and flaunting a Gucci purse and matching shoes, all to draw attention to the fact that she was rich. Her bluntness was meant to garner respect, but Yvonne imagined that only worked in the board room. It certainly wasn’t working with her.

  “Ms. Williams. Thank you for your generous offer, but like Jerry said, I don’t want your money. I’m very happy with what I have.”

  “You say that now, thinking that if you hang around long enough, Jerry will inherit my money, and‒‒”

  Yvonne’s bravado couldn’t contain her temper any longer, “Trust me when I tell you that you could drop dead tomorrow and I still wouldn’t accept your money! But if it would make you feel better, I’m happy to sign a prenuptial agreement.”

  “Yes, that would be lovely,” Virginia reached inside her briefcase, “I just happen to have one here.”

  “What the shit?” Jerry was as shocked as Yvonne was.

  “My lawyer is right over there, and we can have this notarized and on file in a matter of minutes.”

  “Mother, I haven’t asked her to marry me yet. Hell, I haven’t even said I love her yet.”

  “Well, do yo
u love her or not, son?”

  “Why are you acting like this, mother?” Jerry demanded to know.

  Secretly Yvonne would have loved to hear his answer, but not with his pushy mother forcing him to say it.

  “Okay, I hate to spoil the surprise, Yvonne, but when my detective told me he saw Jerry buying an engagement ring the other day, I jumped on the first plane down here.”

  Jerry and Yvonne looked at each other in shock, their eyes wide open, their mouths opened wider. Son of a bitch!

  ***

  Dusk was quickly giving way to the evening stars, as Samantha sat by the river’s edge, watching the water make ripples in the current. She threw a rock as far as she could, and watched as it splashed into the tide. That about says it all, she thought, you’re flying through the air one minute, and sinking like a stone, the next. Watching her ex-fiancée leave with another woman left her feeling heavy, like the stone. She thought she had let Aidan go, up until that moment when they walked through a gauntlet of wedding rice being thrown at them. Then the old twinges resurfaced and a mixture of anger and melancholy over took her.

  Samantha had seen the keys to the Montgomery’s car, lying on the coffee table. The Montgomery’s had gone to a neighborhood barbecue and though they invited her to join them, she declined. She wasn’t being anti-sociable, she just wasn’t in the mood to be nice to people. Bored, and with no one around, she thought she would just borrow their keys and go for a quick drive. It would help to clear her head, she thought. What’s the harm in that? Soon she was lost, and in a different city on the other side of the river. North Little Rock is separated from Little Rock by the Arkansas River and though the city is much smaller, it’s still very easy to get lost in it. Luckily for Samantha, she found her way to the river, where she could see Little Rock from the water’s edge. Truth be told, she could have seen Little Rock from almost anywhere within its small sister city, but Samantha loved the water and wanted to sit beside it, just for a minute.

  Sitting there, alone in the dark, she contemplated what it would be like when it’s just her and her baby. All during her pregnancy she thought it would be her husband who would help her carry the load. Now, she was by herself, or she would be when Dr. Kline allowed her to leave the Montgomery’s home and set out on her own. She really resented being told what to do, where to live, how to live. Before all this happened, she was a strong, independent woman who relished her freedom and now, now she was a puppet and someone else was controlling the strings, and this time it was her own people. Well fuck that!

  She made up her mind then and there, that she would get her life back and it would be better than before, and anyone who tried to tell her differently could go fuck themselves. No one pulls on Samantha Jane Vincent’s strings, she thought. Not anymore, not while there was breath left inside of her. She just needed to get her head screwed back on right and then she would demand to have her life back.

  Samantha had to admit to herself, that for now, she needed Dr. Kline and the Montgomery’s, if she were going to get back on her own two feet. She could see the wisdom in their reasoning, so for now, she would go along with them. At least until the black outs stop and I’m not crazy anymore.

  ***

  “Oh, goody, it’s a party?” Joyce quipped as more people knocked on the door.

  Ellen chastised her, “Joyce, behave yourself. They’re only here out of concern.”

  Most of the afternoon and into the evening, as word spread of her blindness, friends, and friends of friends, were either dropping by, phoning or sending flowers and baskets of treats, all to wish her a speedy recovery.

  “Well, I’m going to the bedroom. I’ve had about all I can stand of their sad voices and get well wishing. I’m not sick! I’ll have my eyesight back in a day or two and be back at work before you know it. Then these assholes can find someone else to gossip about.”

  “Joyce!” the doorbell rang again before Ellen could finish. As she went to the door, Joyce made her way to the bedroom and once she found the door, she slammed it shut behind her.

  “I’m sorry, Joyce is resting, but won’t you come in?” Ellen showed the visitors to the living room.

  Joyce made her way to the bed and felt for the CD player beside the two-seater exercise bicycle that she and her wife bought to exercise on together. Ellen was really the only one who ever used it. Turning up the music, she climbed onto the bike and began pedaling.

  The sound of loud, thumping music vibrated through the walls, “Oh, she must be awake now. Just give me one second while I go check on her,” Ellen quickly walked back to the bedroom.

  “Honey?” She said sweetly for the guests, but when she opened the door to the blaring music, she was instantly irritated, She bellowed at her wife, “Turn that damn music down, we have guests in the next room!” But Joyce only grinned. Ellen walked over and turned the music off, then turned back to Joyce, “What’s the matter, Joyce? What are you trying to prove? Or is it that you just want to embarrass me? Is that it?”

  “No, baby-doll. That’s not it at all. I’m trying to escape the looky-loos and gossipers. Come on, jump on here with me, and let’s ride the hell out of here.”

  “Oh, honey, you’re incorrigible.” The sight of her wife, furiously pedaling a stationary bike, wearing a black mask, was comically cute and definitely charming. Ellen decided if she couldn’t talk sense into her, she’d best join her. “Okay, slow down and let me on.” She grabbed Joyce’s arm and climb up on the bike and together they began pedaling in sync.

  “Where are we going, sweetheart?”

  “Paris!”

  ***

  It was very late when Leonard heard the car come up the driveway and stop. Then he heard the sound of the door closing. Sitting quietly in his lounger, he waited for Samantha to come through the front door.

  “Good evening, Samantha, I hope you had a good time tonight,” Leonard spoke softly as he addressed his house guest.

  “Mr. Montgomery,” she tripped over his name. She hadn't expected to find anyone up and waiting for her at this time of night.

  Leonard got up and looked out the window, “I see that you returned my car in good condition. Did my wife say you could take it?”

  “No, sir. I’m sorry. I just needed to get out of here for a while so I borrowed‒‒”

  He quickly turned back to her, “Sergeant, in this house, no one ‘borrows’ what isn't theirs without asking the proper owner. No one!”

  “No, sir, I mean, yes, sir,” Samantha was caught off guard by the sudden change in Leonard’s demeanor.

  “Sergeant Vincent, it appears that I have been too easy on you. I have let your situation cloud my judgment.”

  “Sir?”

  “You have shown a disregard for rules and expectations. That will stop as of this moment. You have forgotten the discipline required of every good soldier, but I’m going to rectify that now. Follow me.”

  Samantha did as she was told as much out of curiosity as obeying a direct order. Leonard led her to the back yard and stopped. Turning to her, he said, “Drop and give me ten.”

  “You’re not serious? It’s the middle of the night.”

  “You heard me, soldier,” Leonard waited with his hands on his hips and she begrudgingly knelt down and began doing pushups. Samantha, who hadn’t done any type of calisthenics in over three years, felt the weakness in her arms almost immediately.

  As she struggled to do the last five pushups, Leonard took the opportunity to compare those pushups with the struggles of life. Granted, that wasn’t something he would have necessarily done in the Marines, but in this case, he felt he needed to blend the two worlds together. He walked around her as he talked, stopping only long enough to give a count. He explained that life is like pushups, you struggle with just enough energy to push yourself up, then easily fall back to the ground again, letting the struggle win. The trick, he said, is not to fight against yourself. You know there’s going to be a struggle pushing yourself up, you know
it’s going to be hard and you know it’s going to hurt. But if you keep at it, if you push with all your might, soon you will be able to hold yourself up for longer periods at a time and with much more confidence.

  After her eighth pushup, Samantha flopped to the ground crying. She shook her head, she had nothing left. But Leonard wasn’t about to let her give up on herself so he knelt down beside her.

  In a calm voice he said, “What if your baby had given up, Sam? What if it said life was too hard and died right there in the Syrian Desert? You saw his struggle, you know what it took. How can you not be as strong as your baby? You can’t even do ten measly little pushups?”

  Samantha started to get angry, I’ll fucking show him! she thought, and she used that anger to push herself up on her rubber band arms. Nine. She slumped back down, crying harder than before. With tears of frustration and defeat she said “I can’t…”

  Leonard softened his tone, “You can do it, Sam. Just one more to go and this last one is just for you. I want you to push against what life is throwing at you, push against the heartache. Push against the anger and frustration,” then Leonard quickly went back into his Sergeant’s role, and yelled, “Push soldier, that’s an order!”

  Samantha pushed, grunted, cried and screamed, but she did it, she pushed up on her twitching arms and held it there until Leonard knelt down to her eye’s view and smiled.

  He patted her on top of her head and said, “You did it, Sam! You did it!”

  Samantha collapsed to the ground, but this time, her heart was lighter than it had been in years.

  ***

  “How are things at the Montgomery house, Samantha?” Dakota asked as she came out of her office carrying a stack of paperwork and set them on Samantha’s desk.

  Rubbing the sore muscles on her arm, Samantha replied, “Surprisingly, it’s pretty good. The Sarge is strict and soft at the same time,” She didn’t tell Dakota about the pushups or about how much better she felt afterwards. Not because she was able to do ten pushups, but because of the reason she did them. She had a full understanding of what Leonard expected of her now and that gave her a better understanding of what she should expect from herself. Many times she had come close to giving up on hope, but she always found her way back. This time, Leonard helped her see that his expectations offered her hope.