“I’m not getting off this desk until you get that mouse out of here.”
Jared kicked lightly at the base of the cooler.
Covering her mouth, Marci screeched.
“Marci, that mouse is more afraid of you than you are of him. Get off the desk and call an exterminator. And while you’re at it, call The New York Times classifieds and run that ad again for a personal injury lawyer.”
“But, Jared, suppose that mouse runs up my legs.”
“That mouse is long gone. There’s probably a hole behind the cooler.” Again, he kicked at the base. He didn’t expect that the mouse would run from behind it. Mice were smarter than that. They knew how to stay hidden until they figured the coast was clear. He certainly didn’t have the inclination or time to wait out a mouse. He had work to do and he wasn’t amused that Marci was still perched on top of her desk.
“Marci, since you’re planning to work from atop your desk today, it’s a good thing the telephone is up there with you. See if you can reach Raoul. Find out if he made it down to the law library. I need that Anderson versus Queens General Hospital brief today.” He started back into his office.
“Jared, come on. You can’t make me work in here with a mouse running around. I’m afraid of mice.”
“Marci, we’re in a storefront on Parsons Boulevard. God knows what kind of stores have occupied this site in the last century. Frankly, I’m surprised we haven’t seen a whole family of mice before today. And believe me, that little mouse isn’t thinking about you. He’s looking for a meal. You can’t fault a hungry animal for looking for a meal.” Again, Jared checked his watch. “If my wife calls, put her through right away.” He went on into his office and closed the door.
Before Jared could get to his desk, the intercom buzzed. He hadn’t heard the telephone ring so he knew it had to be Marci still acting silly. “Marci, that mouse isn’t even thinking about you.”
“Mr. Crawford, a Miss Evonne Fulton is here to see you.”
Jared was suddenly hopeful. “Send her in.” He met Evonne at the door. “Have you heard from Tandi?”
“I talked to her last night, why? Isn’t she home?”
Jared glimpsed Marci looking at him. “Let’s talk in my office.”
Inside the privacy of his office, he continued to stand while Evonne sat. “Tandi walked out last night. She took MJ with her.”
“Oh.”
“I haven’t heard from her. I don’t know where she is. I tried her at work, I tried her at home, I called her brother. Nothing. I thought she might be at your place.”
“No, she isn’t. Like I said, I did speak with her last night, but I think that was before you got home.”
“Did she say anything about a divorce?”
Evonne nodded not too eagerly.
“Oh, man.” Jared turned away and back again. “Damn. I didn’t think she meant it.”
“She meant it. She’s serious.”
The knot in Jared’s stomach tightened, cramping him. He abruptly turned on his heels and went to his caseload board on the side wall. Kneading his stomach with his fist, he scanned the board but took in none of what he saw. A divorce was not what he wanted.
“Jared, Tandi probably just needs a little space. She’s pretty upset.”
He whirled around. “About what? About me doing my job?”
“That, and the fact that you don’t make love to her anymore.”
He felt like he was punched in the gut. Les the bartender was right. Jared looked away.
“Don’t be embarrassed, Jared. Tandi and I are best friends. We talk.”
“That’s what I hear,” he said, slumping down into the chair under the caseload board.
“I also know about the affair you had.”
“Damn, you women talk too much. Look, I’m not having an affair now. I don’t know how Tandi could think that.”
“Because you had one before.”
“You can stop reminding me of my past indiscretion.”
“Jared, you had to know that Tandi’s never forgiven you.”
“I know it now.”
“Look, I came here to tell you, face-to-face, that you shouldn’t take this too hard.”
“How should I take it, Evonne? I love Tandi. I want her and MJ home. I’m not having an affair. I told Tandi that I would never do that to her again. I know I messed up before. I was dead wrong, but . . . but I really need to be talking to Tandi about this.”
“Yes, you should be, but, Jared, until she’s ready to talk, you need to let her work through this by herself. If you hassle her, you’ll only push her faster into a divorce. Give her the space she needs. She’ll come around. She’ll see that you’re a good man and come back.”
He wasn’t sure about that. “If I leave Tandi alone and don’t try to get her back, I could lose her for good.”
“Jared, trust me. You won’t lose Tandi. She’s not stupid. She’s stubborn, but she’s not stupid.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning that Tandi isn’t going to walk out on a good man. She’ll come around.”
He knew how stubborn Tandi could be. “How much time does she need?”
“I guess a few weeks, a month.”
“A month?”
“Jared, the more you go after Tandi, the more she’ll show you her ass. I guarantee you, you contact Tandi before she contacts you, she’ll tell you about yourself in every way but the holy way.”
He didn’t doubt it. Tandi had gotten her back up against the wall many times over the years, and the more he tried to reason with her, the more she stood her ground. “So what about MJ? I’m not going weeks without seeing him.”
“You won’t have to. Tandi is supposed to call me tomorrow. I’ll talk to her about MJ. If she lets me, I’ll pick him up wherever he is and bring him to you for a visit.”
“You’d do that for me?”
“Of course I would. Tandi is my girl and I love her to death, but right is right. You should see your son.”
“Thanks,” he said, feeling a bit better. Jared rubbed his chin then the sides of his face. It felt like coarse sandpaper. Tandi would hate that he hadn’t shaved that morning. There was a time when she used to like rubbing her face up against his right after he shaved. When he didn’t shave, although he wore a suit every day, he looked like a scruffy lumberjack. Tandi didn’t like that look.
“Are you growing a beard?” Evonne asked, crossing her legs.
“I just didn’t shave this morning.”
“I think you’d look good with a beard.”
“Tandi never thought so.”
“Well, I think you would. You should try it.”
“Nah. I’d look like my grandfather with a beard.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“He was old.”
“Oh, Jared,” Evonne cooed, “you wouldn’t look old. I think you’d look quite handsome.”
“I don’t know.”
“Try it. If you don’t like it, shave it off.”
Jared rubbed his chin. “Maybe. Of course, I’d have to shave it off the minute Tandi comes home.”
“Yes, but while she’s gone, you’re free to do anything you like.”
“I guess,” he said, feeling the knot tighten again. He didn’t want to be free to do anything he liked. “Evonne, would you do something for me?”
“Anything,” she said, a little too eagerly.
“When you talk to Tandi, ask her if she’ll go out to dinner with me tomorrow night or any night. Anywhere she wants.”
“Jared, I’ll go you one better. I’ll plead with Tandi to go out to dinner with you.”
“Thanks. I’m glad she has a good friend like you.”
“I consider myself your friend, too, Jared. If you need to talk, anytime, day or night, just call. Do you have my home number?”
“No.”
“Here,” she said, pulling out a business card from a side pocket in her pocketbook. She quickly jotted down her hom
e telephone number on the back.
Jared took the card.
Checking her wristwatch, Evonne quickly stood. “I’m showing a co-op apartment a few blocks from here.”
“Business is good, huh?”
“Not bad. Selling apartments is a kiss-ass business and being on time is a must. Can’t keep money waiting.”
“How long have you been in real estate?” Jared asked, standing also.
“Going on seven years. I’m thinking about getting more into selling houses, like Tandi.”
“Is she doing okay? I mean, selling houses?”
“Oh, you don’t know?”
“Tandi doesn’t talk much about her job.”
“Well, I don’t think she much likes real estate anymore. She hasn’t had a big sell lately. Actually, I sell more apartments; there’s a quicker turnover. People are less likely to move out of a house than an apartment. But the money is better on a house sell. Plus, I’ve seen houses that I wish I could buy for myself.”
The intercom buzzed. Jared quickly answered it.
“Jared, your ten o’clock, Mrs. Peterman, is here.”
“Give me a minute.” He walked Evonne to the door. “Thanks for coming by.”
“I’ll call you as soon as I hear from Tandi.”
“Thanks,” he said. “If it’s after seven tonight, try me at home.”
“I will,” she said, leaving as Mrs. Peterman stood to come into the office.
Jared felt better knowing Evonne would speak to Tandi for him. He had never sat down and talked to Evonne alone before, but he wasn’t surprised at how pleasant she was. Tandi had always spoken well of her—a good friend and very professional. Knowing Tandi, she wouldn’t have any other kind of friend. She was usually pleasant herself and was once his good friend. If Evonne could get them talking again, it would be the answer to his prayer. Until Daina got back from her trip, he had only Evonne to rely on.
“Good morning, Mrs. Peterman. I have good news for you.”
11
A little voice had told Tandi to keep Michael Jared out of school, but she ignored it. She was sure he would be okay. No sooner had she dropped him off; gotten home; packed two more suitcases of clothes, shoes, and personal necessities for them both when the telephone rang. Assuming it was Jared, again, she let the answering machine take the call.
“Mrs. Crawford, this is Mrs. Laird, the principal of I.S. One Eleven. As soon as—”
Tandi snatched the telephone off the receiver and simultaneously switched off the answering machine. “Mrs. Laird, this is Mrs. Crawford.”
“Mrs. Crawford, I’m calling about your son, Michael. I would like for you to come to the school to pick him up as soon as possible.”
“Is he sick?”
“No. He’s been in a fight.”
“What? He doesn’t fight.”
“He did today. Michael’s teacher said he wasn’t himself all morning. In fact, he had been quite sullen. When Mrs. Augustine stepped out of the classroom for a moment, Michael picked a fight with another boy.”
“Oh, God.” Tandi knew her child was only venting his anger at her. “I’m sorry. Is my son or the other boy hurt?”
“The fight was broken up right away, but the other child was knocked down.”
“But he wasn’t hurt?”
“It doesn’t appear so.”
“Thank God.”
“Mrs. Crawford, we’ve never had any trouble with Michael. Is there a problem at home we should be aware of?”
Tandi hated to have to put her business out in the open, but to keep Michael Jared from being penalized, she had no choice. “My husband and I have recently separated.”
“Oh, I see.”
Tandi felt like she was sitting on a hot seat. “Michael didn’t sleep very well last night.”
“I see,” Mrs. Laird said again. “Mrs. Crawford, would you like for me to make an appointment for Michael to see the school counselor?”
“It’s certainly a good idea, Mrs. Laird, but let me speak to Michael first. I’ll be there within a half hour.”
“He’s sitting outside my office. Please see me first.”
“Of course. Is he suspended?”
“It’s his first offense, so I’m only sending him home for the day. If he should do this again, however, he will be.”
“Mrs. Laird, thank you for understanding, I’ll see you shortly.”
Oh, God. What had she done? Had she unwittingly messed up Michael Jared’s life? She expected he would have problems adjusting, she just didn’t think his problems would start immediately. Picking a fight was something Michael Jared never did, especially being a karate student who was taught discipline and control were the most important skills of the art. Not to mention what she had drilled into him about not fighting. How was it that in a twenty-four-hour period he had gone from a well-behaved child to one who picked fights? Tandi could blame no one but herself. She had disrupted Michael Jared’s life—taken him from his father, taken him from his home and put him under the roof of the mighty grinch. Maybe she needed to rethink her plans. Maybe she was going to have to leave Michael Jared with his father for a while.
Tandi was about to leave the house. At the front door she stopped and looked back through the house. There was a dull ache in her heart. She closed her eyes so she could feel what was once her home. When she and Jared first moved in, she had stood so. Then she had felt the emptiness of any life force, good or bad. The house lacked warmth. It lacked that lived-in feeling—it had been empty for eight months prior to their buying it. A year later, after their personal essence seeped into the walls, into the floors, into the air; after her furniture and personal touches gave the rooms personality, she had stood at the door many times with her eyes closed, reveling in the homey aura that surrounded her—the delicious smell of her cooking, fresh flowers in season scenting the air, the life force of their bodies. Back then, Jared’s desire for her was strong. Her passion for him was equal that of his. Throughout that first year, whenever they were alone, and sometimes when Michael Jared was asleep, they made love in every room. That is, except Michael Jared’s—there was something sacrilegious about that. She had much to be grateful for in those days. Her life could not have been better, but like the once supple white orchid that she saved from her wedding bouquet now sandwiched between the pages of her wedding album, her marriage and her home had wilted and dried out. Perhaps that was because neither she nor Jared had been vigilant about nourishing their love for each other.
Standing as she was at that moment, the homey aura that Tandi so enjoyed was no longer strongly felt. Apparently, how one feels about one’s home has a lot to do with how one feels about one’s partner. Tandi opened her eyes. Somehow she had to make a home elsewhere for herself and Michael Jared, but first, somehow, she had to find the right words to make him feel better.
12
Michael Jared’s head was down, his lip was stuck out, his hands were folded in his lap. His slim body was drawn tight. He looked smaller than he was. He was five feet three, not really a big boy, not yet anyway, but Tandi knew he would be one day because of his size nine feet and his long spindlelike fingers. If he did grow tall, he would be taller than Jared, but for now, he was a little boy hurting because of her desperate need to make changes in her life.
Tandi sat next to Michael Jared and lay her arm around his shoulders. “You all right?”
Michael Jared continued to hold his head down.
Bending lower, Tandi tried to look into his eyes. “Honey, are you all right?”
From under his lashes, tears brimmed and rolled down Michael Jared’s cheeks.
Tandi lovingly wiped at his tears. “You’re not hurt, are you?”
Shaking his head, he sniffled. “You mad at me?”
“Oh, honey, no,” she said, drawing him to her. “I know why you’re upset. I promise you, soon, everything will be all right.”
“Can we go back home?”
She was afraid he�
�d ask that question. “We’ll talk about it.”
Michael Jared pulled away. “Mommy, I don’t wanna live with Granddad.”
“We’re not living with Granddad. We’re just staying there for a few days.”
“I don’t wanna stay there a few days. I wanna go home,” he said aloud. Tears washed down his cheeks.
Tandi took a tissue from her jacket pocket and dried Michael Jared’s face. “We’ll see what we can do, okay?”
Several feet away, the school secretary cleared her throat. Tandi could see the secretary wasn’t looking at them directly, but she knew she had to be listening—the pen she had in her hand hadn’t scribbled a word.
“Is Mrs. Laird in?” Tandi asked.
The secretary looked up. “She was called away. She should be back in about ten minutes.”
Tandi stood. “I’m sorry, I can’t wait. Tell Mrs. Laird that I was here and I’ll call Mrs. Augustine to get Michael’s homework assignment.”
“Mrs. Crawford, if you’ll wait, Mrs. Laird will only be a few minutes more.”
“I have to leave.” After helping Michael Jared into his jacket, Tandi picked up his backpack and swung it over her left shoulder. Then taking him by the hand, she led him out of the office, down the long shell-colored hallway out of the building. Nothing Mrs. Laird had to say to her would solve her problem or Michael Jared’s. As she drove in the opposite direction of what was no longer their home, she glanced at him.
Michael Jared began to squirm in his seat when he saw they weren’t going home. He began to cry again.
“Honey, I made you a promise that everything will be all right, and it will.”
“It won’t be all right if we’re not going home.”
“Michael Jared, please give me a chance to straighten everything out. I told you, you will be with your father.”
“When?”
“Soon. Just give me a chance to work things out with him.”
“But you’re not gonna be with him, are you?”
Glancing again at him—his eyes glistening with tears, waiting anxiously for her to say yes—Tandi wanted so much to tell him what he wanted to hear. She looked back at the road.
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