“You wouldn’t, huh? As far as I can see, you and Glynn turned out all right.”
“I’m not so sure about that. Glynn could use some therapy.”
Sporty lifted his brows. “Why’s that? You saying I did something to Glynn? You saying he’s crazy?”
“He’s no crazier than I am, but he could sure use some help in figuring out why he’s so disgustingly selfish and controlling.”
Sporty narrowed his gaze. “You saying that’s my fault?”
“You spoiled him.”
“You always claimed he was spoiled. He used to say the same about you.”
“I wasn’t the one who got a car at eighteen.”
“No, but you got a trip to Hawaii.”
“I paid for half of it. I don’t remember Glynn paying a cent for his car. And his car cost more than my trip.”
“Be careful, Tandida. You sound mighty jealous of Glynn.”
“Jealous, I am not, but I see as always you’ve dismissed anything I had to say as being inconsequential. You’ve done that all my life.”
“You sayin’ I treated you bad? That I didn’t do right by you?”
Tandi had to pause. What was she doing? How did she get herself suckered into this conversation? Again she dunked the sponge in the bucket of water. She squeezed it hard and watched the water slip out between her fingers.
“Why don’t you answer me, Tandida? You sayin’ I didn’t do right by you?”
“Daddy, we’ve reopened this scab too many times. It is sadistically redundant.”
“Humor me,” Sporty said, his voice low and deep. “Tell me how I wronged you.”
She chuckled. “I know this game. See, we always play this game your way. You tell me that you did what a lot of men would not have done and how grateful I should be. You’ll degrade my mother without mentioning her name and stop me from asking about her. I lose every time because I’ll end up tense and angry.”
“And you’re not tense and angry now, right?”
Tandi dunked the sponge into the bucket, splashing water on herself and the floor. “Let’s not play this game.”
A little smile crept across Sporty’s lips and swiftly faded when Tandi frowned at him. He knew what buttons to push. He knew how far to go and she knew this. She had seen that wicked little half smile and knew that he knew that he had gotten to her. That was the sick little game he played with her as far back as she could remember. When he knew he had her, he’d smile that evil little half smile out of the side of his face and then pull back, satisfied with himself. Even knowing this, she always fell into his trap. When was she ever going to learn?
“Tandida, that ammonia opened up my sinuses. I’m probably gonna get a nasal infection or cold or something.”
Tandi glowered at Sporty. She wanted to call him a hard-nosed son of a bitch. She wanted to tell him she didn’t need to be in his house, but she couldn’t. Instead she busied herself trying to open the second window. It wouldn’t bulge. Old paint, dust, and time had glued it shut. With the side of her fist, Tandi tapped all around the frame. Feeling the strain across her chest, she grunted as she pulled on the window with all of her might. It wasn’t lost on her that Sporty wasn’t making any moves to help her. Finally the window opened with a jerk and cold air washed over Tandi cooling her down. Wasting no time, she took up her sponge and stuck her arm outside the window up to the shoulder, awkwardly bending it around the frame, trying to reach higher to wash away the weathered soot. Water ran down her arm.
“Heating oil cost money, you know.”
“Oh, please! How much, Daddy? Just tell me, I’ll pay for it.”
“I don’t want your money.”
With the side of her face pressed to the pane, her neck pinched by the wood of the frame, Tandi gritted her teeth and ignored the cold. She widened her strokes, wiping furiously at the dirt and grime.
“You missed a spot to the right.” Sporty started out of the room. Under his breath, he said, “Stubborn, just like your mother.”
Only after he was gone did Tandi relax and ease up on her strokes. She had heard what he said about her mother. A long time ago she gave up on trying to find out what he meant by that. As much as it goaded her, she wasn’t about to dwell on it. It would only aggravate her more. Besides, Sporty always said things like that to get the last jab in. She thought time was supposed to mellow a person. Apparently, in Sporty’s case, he wasn’t getting any more mellow than a piece of rotting meat forgotten in the bottom of the refrigerator. She’d had enough of him growing up, and as sure as she was breathing, she wasn’t about to repeat her childhood and endure his heartlessness, and most definitely, she was certainly not going to have Michael Jared exposed to him any longer than she had to. She tossed the sponge into the bucket. It was time to call Evonne.
15
“Sorry I’m late.”
Evonne looked up from her menu. “Just ten minutes. I was a little late myself.” Evonne closed the menu. “Tandi, you look terrible.”
“Tell me something I don’t already know,” Tandi said, sitting.
“I’m sorry, but you do look awful.”
“I haven’t had much sleep.”
“Obviously.” Evonne lay her menu on the table. “Tandi, why are you staying at your father’s? You hate the man.”
“I had to stay somewhere.”
“You could’ve called me. You could’ve—”
“Evonne, you don’t have the space and you do have a social life. With me and Michael Jared around—”
“Are you ready to order?” the waiter asked, suddenly appearing at Tandi’s shoulder. He placed a glass of water in front of her with one hand. In the other he held a small order pad. He pulled a pencil from behind his right ear.
Tandi wasn’t hungry. “I’ll just have a cappuccino. Light on the cinnamon, please.”
“Make that two,” Evonne said.
“Anything else?”
“That’s it,” Evonne said.
The waiter turned abruptly and walked away, hanging his pad over his apron at the waist.
“Tandi, I won’t lecture. You know how I feel. But, please, make sure you know what you’re doing. You don’t want to look back years from now and regret this decision. I always thought you and Jared had something special.”
Tandi began pleating the hem of the white tablecloth that rested on her lap. “Maybe we did, before he cheated on me.”
The waiter returned with the cappuccinos.
“Tandi, you have got to let go of that. The man said he was sorry when it first happened, and I sorta believe he meant it.”
“Sorta?”
“Tandi, neither one of us is a fool. A man can be just as sorry the third time as he is the first time.”
“Yes, and we both know that sorry is a sorry word.”
“True, but you can’t stop trusting forever. You’ll be miserable. You’ll always be suspicious.”
“Better suspicious than naive.”
“That’s a miserable way to live.”
“Evonne, that’s my point exactly. I’ve been miserable for the past three years. I did everything but stand on my head to get Jared to look at what we used to have. I hoped and prayed we could get whatever it was back, but he was always too busy. Believe me, I understand what he’s trying to do and I was in his corner from the start, but . . . but now I’m so angry with him, I feel like that anger is a part of my being.” Tandi lay her hand over her heart. “Evonne, I wear that anger with Jared on my face, and I can feel it stinging my tongue whenever I speak to him or about him. I know Michael Jared sees and feels my anger at his father. This is why I can’t be around Jared right now.”
“Damn, Tandi, I didn’t know you were feeling it that deep. I had been thinking if you could get over what happened and really gave Jared another chance, he might open his eyes.”
The urge to cry eased up. “I seriously doubt it. I’m no miracle worker, I can’t make a blind man see.”
“Tandi, if you feel t
hat badly, maybe you do need to divorce Jared.”
She teared. “Look, I’m all messed up here.” She dabbed her eyes with her napkin. “Enough about me and my problems, Evonne. What’s happening in your life?”
“Nothing.” Evonne sipped her cappuccino.
“How’s Richard?”
“Richard is fine, but crazy out of his damn mind. Do you know he wanted to go bowling the other night?”
“What’s crazy about that?”
“Tandi, really. Do I look like I’m about to put these expensive ass”—Evonne held her hands flat out for Tandi to see—“diamond-tipped, one-inch nails inside the germified nail-breaking holes of a bowling ball?”
Sipping her cappuccino, Tandi chuckled.
“See, that’s why Richard is about to be shown the door. He’s too blue collar for me.”
“Evonne, Richard is a corporate tax accountant. His collar can’t get any whiter.”
“Please,” Evonne said, sucking her teeth. “I am not talking about his profession. I’m talking about his attitude. Richard thinks blue collar. The boy likes to bowl. He likes to hike. He even likes to eat hot dogs off the street. Yuck.”
“Evonne, why’re you knocking Richard? He’s a good man. Besides, you and I both have eaten hot dogs from a street vendor when we’ve been out shopping all day.”
“That was one time and we were in a hurry. Richard does it as a matter of course. He likes them. He’ll pass up a four-star restaurant to get a dirty dog off some pissy-hand vendor.”
Tandi began to laugh.
“What are you laughing at?”
“You. You are too funny. I knew you were snooty, but not this snooty.”
Evonne flipped her hand at Tandi. “Like you aren’t.”
“Oh, honey, I am so far from snooty.”
“You can’t prove it by me. Look at the clothes you’re wearing.”
Tandi glanced down at her gray knit sweater and matching pants. It didn’t cost her much because she caught it at a sixty percent off sale. “I paid eighty dollars for this, and pray tell, what do clothes have to do with snootiness?”
“Snooty people don’t wear cheap clothes, and you never wear cheap-looking clothes. And what about your house? I remember when Jared let you renovate the kitchen and bathrooms because you thought they were old-fashioned when they were perfectly fine.”
Tandi was beginning to feel not too good about the way their conversation was going. “Evonne, I think we need to talk about something else besides me.”
Evonne folded her arms and sat back. “Fine. Let’s go back to Jared then.”
Tandi was puzzled by the way Evonne was looking at her. Her eyes were hard and unwavering. She looked like she had tasted something bitterly sour. “What’s wrong with you, Evonne?”
“Nothing’s wrong with me, but as I see it, something’s wrong with Jared, and that’s because of the problem he has, and that problem is you.”
Tandi’s mouth dropped open. Was she in the twilight zone?
“That’s right, I said it and it’s true. You know what you said about Richard being a good man? The same could be said about Jared.”
“Wait a minute. Evonne, whose side are you on? Jared cheated on me. I did not cheat on him.”
“Of course not. You’re Little Miss Perfect.”
Wham! Where the hell that came from Tandi didn’t know, but it certainly knocked the wind out of her. “Perfect? Evonne, is that how you see me?”
“That’s how you see yourself, Tandi, and frankly, that’s probably how a lot of people see you, including me.”
Tandi gasped. Was this girlfriend talk? If it was, she wasn’t enjoying it.
Evonne flipped her hand at Tandi. “Child, don’t look so scandalized. Being perfect isn’t something to be ashamed of. The way I see it, you’re perfect and Jared isn’t. He’s like me. We’re imperfect. See, Tandi, I believe we’re all entitled to make mistakes, but then the mistakes are either forgotten or forgiven, and we all move on.”
“That’s easy for you to say. Jared didn’t cheat on you.”
“No, but—”
“He cheated on perfect me.”
“Yes, he did. It was an act of an imperfect man. Your husband made a mistake, Tandi. Get over it.”
“Evonne, Jared may not have committed an act of treason or hammered the last nail into the palm of Jesus Christ, but he broke his vow to me.”
“And he won’t be the last man to do that to you or any other woman out there. Look, Tandi, I talked to Jared last night. He’s really upset.”
“You called him?”
“No, he called me.”
That struck Tandi as curious. “He doesn’t know your home number.”
“He’s not stupid, Tandi. All he had to do was look at the caller ID box. I must’ve called your house a million times—my number isn’t blocked. Look, the man needed to talk to someone. I’m your friend, who better to talk to?”
That made sense, but she wished Daina was home for Jared to sound off on.
“Jared sounded terrible, Tandi. He’s really upset about you leaving.”
“Isn’t that just too bad? What did you say, Evonne? Forgive or forget? Well, I’m forgetting about Jared. I’ve made my decision, and I’ll live by it just as Jared is doing.”
Tandi threw her napkin onto the table. “Oh, and Evonne, how sweet of you to have all this empathy for Jared. Save it. He doesn’t need it. Jared is kinda cold—very little upsets him. My leaving probably hasn’t even nicked his emotions—maybe his pride, but not his emotions. If he called you, he was calling about Michael Jared. Him, he cares about.”
Evonne picked up her cup. She took a slow, pensive sip and frowned. “This stuff is nasty when it’s cold. I may as well drink water.” But she didn’t. “You’re right. Jared did ask about Michael Jared. In fact, he talked mostly about him. What he did say about you was that he didn’t blame you for walking out, that he would have done the same thing if he were in your shoes.”
For some strange reason, despite what she had said about being angry with Jared, Tandi felt hurt. “That’s fine. So if you knew that he said that, why were you trying to make me the bad guy in all of this?”
“Tandi, I love you. I can’t stand seeing you messed up like this. Believe me, I was just trying to get you to want your marriage back.”
“Don’t worry about it. Just leave it alone. As for Michael Jared, Jared can see him this afternoon.”
“Does he know where you’re staying?”
“My big-mouth son told him last night, but I don’t want Jared coming to my father’s house. It’ll only make things worse over there. They’ve never gotten along.”
“Girl, I wouldn’t want your troubles.” Evonne took a sip of her water. “Tandi, I owe you an apology. I was hard on you because I care. You were right to leave Jared. I see that now.”
Tandi didn’t know what to believe. She had no idea that Evonne felt the way she did about her. Miss Perfect? No matter what Evonne’s reasons were for saying what she did, the feelings were there, and they were critical and damning.
Evonne reached across the table and touched Tandi’s hand. “Please don’t be mad at me. I was only trying to make sure you were doing the right thing. Like I promised you yesterday, I am going to help you in any way I can.”
“Thank you,” she said, relenting a bit. “Look, Evonne, I don’t want you involved in all of this. I’m sorry Jared bothered you. I’ll tell him not to call and annoy you again.”
“Oh no,” Evonne said, lightly waving her hand. “He didn’t annoy me, and actually, I can talk to him for you since you don’t wanna see him. Maybe I can get him to understand how much he’s hurt you.”
“I doubt it, but don’t bother with that either. Leave it alone.”
“Okay, but you should let me be the go-between because you can’t just cut off all communication between you two. You have a son.”
That was true.
“Think about it, Tandi. If Jared has
an emergency, he knows that I’m the one person you’ll always be in touch with besides his pal, Daina, and she’s away, right?”
“I don’t think we’ll have too many emergencies between us.”
“You will if Michael Jared is with either of you and he gets hurt.”
That was true, too.
“Would you ladies like anything else?” the waiter asked.
“Yes, please,” Evonne said cheerfully. “Two more hot cappuccinos. Ours are cold. And, please, bring me a Danish. I’m hungry for something sweet all of a sudden. What about you, Tandi?”
“Nothing.”
The waiter left.
“Evonne, can we talk about the apartment? Where is it?”
“One hundred and seventy-second Street, off Hillside Avenue. Two large, beautiful bedrooms on the front. You get the morning sun, and it’s bright in there all day. I can show it to you tomorrow. Tandi, you’ll love it. I’ll help you move in.”
“Good, because I’m on a mission. I’m forging ahead with a new life and a hellified new attitude. What I even thought I ever wanted, I’m going after.”
16
Tandi did love the apartment—four large rooms all facing the front of the well-kept, clean, half century old building—no brick walls to block her view onto bustling Hillside Avenue. If her car broke down, she had plenty of transportation only minutes away. Tandi wasted no time on second thoughts. She went directly to the manager’s office to fill out the application. Mrs. Langhorn assured her she would put a rush on the credit check so that she could be in the apartment within a week—two weeks at the most. From the apartment, Tandi went straight to the bank and had a teller’s check for thirty-six hundred dollars drawn up to cover a month’s rent and two months’ security. When the application approval came, she wanted to be ready. There wasn’t much she had to buy in the way of furniture; the bedroom suite in the spare bedroom was hers, as was the set in the dining room. It was her money that had made those purchases and so much more throughout Jared’s house, that made it more than a house of brick and plaster. She was going to have to buy furniture for Michael Jared’s room, but then it was time he had more grown-up things. His single captain’s bed with the attached desk was a mite small for his growing body. He was going to like having a big new bed. It might take a little while, but he would get used to their new life. One day at a time was all it was going to take. Michael Jared was going to be fine, and so was she.
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