Trusting You

by Heather D'Agostino

  “That guy that studied with you like every day during summer school. You were talking about him all the time before you came to see me. Before…” her lips slammed shut as her eyes went wide. “Never mind,” she shook her head.

  “Never mind what? You can’t do shit like that, Emma,” I narrowed my eyes on her. I knew what she was going to say, but I was hoping to avoid talking about him.

  “You were all about library guy until you met Aaron,” she closed her eyes as she pinched her nose. “Please tell me you’re not turning down guys because of my cousin. He’s such a player, Mel.”

  “I’m not turning dates down because of him. I just haven’t met anyone worth my time. I have too much going on at home anyway,” I brushed her off. I liked to keep my personal life to myself. I didn’t share information about my past or any part of my family with anyone, not even Emma. I’d been burned one too many times in the past, and had learned from it. Over the last two years I’ve worked to move on, and be a different person, a better person.

  “Good, I’m glad,” she gave a quick jerk of her head.

  “Why’s that?” I folded my hands on the table in front of me.

  “Because I can tell him to go fuck himself when he calls me again. He’s been harassing me for weeks to get your number. I didn’t want to overstep, but he’s family and it’s time to be blunt,” she grumbled and then I watched her face transform in front of me. “When Brock comes to visit you need to come out with us and bring a date. We’ll take lots of pictures and then I’ll put them on Instagram and tag him. Maybe if he’s sees you’re not interested, he’ll leave me alone about it.”

  “I don’t want to be mean about it. Doesn’t that seem a little bitchy?” I finished off my coffee and slumped back in the chair.

  “Sometimes you have to be with his type. Aaron’s always been this way. He thinks he can have whomever he wants and he treats women terribly. I want to show him that you’re not going to fall for his bullshit. You’re not falling for it, right?” she leaned forward like we were sharing a secret.

  “No,” I murmured.

  “That didn’t sound to convincing,” Emma shook her head. “I knew this was going to happen.”

  “Knew what was going to happen?” I crinkled my forehead as I tried to figure out exactly what she meant.

  “You like him, and despite the fact that he was a total douche to you, you want to forgive him,” she wagged her finger in front of me.

  “That’s not true,” I argued. I was lying through my teeth, but I was not about to admit to her that I was losing the battle against my heart. I hadn’t even been on date with him, but I knew Aaron was special. He tried to come off as this macho jock, but I know that somewhere inside is a scared boy and all this is a front. How do I know this? Because I’m the same way.

  “Say whatever you want,” she waved her hand, “but I know the truth.”

  “Can we pretend that you don’t? Just for a little while?” I whined. “I not ready for any deep conversation yet, and I don’t know if I’m ever going to be able to let somebody like him in. Can we just pretend that none of this happened, and that I’m not going to be hurt if I see him with another girl anytime soon? Aaron Sutter will never want to be with someone like me. We’re nothing alike, at least not anymore.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Emma looked at me confused.

  “I’m too tired to get into it tonight, and way too sober. One day when I’ve had some wine maybe I’ll tell you. Let’s just say, you don’t know me. You think you do, but you don’t and if we’d gone to high school together, we wouldn’t have just been in different circles, we would have been on different planets.”

  “Fine, you get a pass for now, but Mel,” she reached across the table and gripped my wrist. “You’re not a bad person. I don’t know what you did to make you think that you are, but I do know that a bad person couldn’t have supported me the way you’ve done over the last two years.”

  “Fair enough,” I stood and pushed my chair under. “I gotta get to class. See you tonight. We can study together.”

  “It’s the first week,” Emma called as I walked away.

  “Never hurts to get ahead,” I waved my hand in the air as I weaved through the dining hall to head outside.

  Chapter 2

  Aaron

  I thought when she left I’d be able to forget about her. No such luck. Melinda Brooks plagued my thoughts. I tried ignoring them for months. I went to class, met up with friends, went out with multiple women, but it didn’t work. Every time one of them would touch me, or kiss me, or anything my brain wanted it to be her. Her soft hands touching me. Her plump lips kissing me. Her warm body surrendering to me.

  I’ve gone almost stalkerish to spy on her. I look at her Facebook page each week. I bug my cousin, Emma, as often as I can without pissing her off, and lately I’ve even become closer friends with Brock.

  When Brock started dating Emma, I thought it was a mistake but he proposed over Christmas break, so he’s soon to be family. To say I was disappointed that Mel didn’t come with Emma for break would be an understatement, but I understand. She has her own family to spend time with. Although, the fact that she lives on campus when they only live twenty minutes away is odd to me. To each their own.

  Now, why am I talking so much about all of this? Well, right now I’m sitting at the bar that I’m too young to be in waiting for Brock and his coworkers to show up. My dad works with him, but he’s busy today so I can get away with this. I go to school nearby, so I come home more often that Emma. Emma mentioned that Brock was planning to come visit her in a few weeks, and I’m hoping to convince him to take me along. I have no idea how I’m going to do this, but after six beers I’m feeling rather confident.

  “Dude!” I shouted as I almost fell off my stool. Brock busted out laughing as he weaved through the crowd.

  “How many of those have you had?” he chuckled as he stopped and leaned in beside me.

  “Enough,” I grinned as the bartender handed me another. “I gotta ride,” I rolled my eyes.

  “And who would that be?” he glanced around before looking back at me.

  “You,” I snickered as I lifted the bottle to my lips and chugged.

  “I’m not driving your ass back to your apartment,” he scoffed as the bartender came over. He ordered a beer before turning back to me. “You never come home in the middle of the week, man. What’s going on?”

  “So now you want to be my friend?” I mumbled as I shifted on my stool. Brock and I had a love/ hate relationship. My cousin pined over him for years when we were kids. She thought she was sly about it, but anyone with eyes saw it. Brock was a senior when I was a freshman. He was the star of the football team. Being one of the assistant coach’s kids, I got to do a lot with the team. Brock was kinda like a big brother to me. When he came back to town two years ago and started working with my dad, we became closer. We’re more like friends now, but family comes first. When he started dating Emma, I distanced myself. I didn’t want to have to beat his ass for hurting her. Now that they’re getting married, he’s more of a best friend. I’m convinced if I get on Brock’s good side, he’ll take me to see Mel. I know, I’m so pathetic, but I need to get this feeling out of my system that I get when I think about her. She’s just a girl, at least that’s what I keep telling myself, but my body seems to crave her and I can’t quench it.

  “We’ve always been friends,” Brock sighed as he sipped his beer. He’s seen me like this before. He knows I’m drunk and that my mouth tends to spew things out when I’m intoxicated.

  “Most of the time,” I grumbled. “I need a favor,” I swallowed.

  “You’re not staying over,” he glared at me. “After the last time…” he shook his head at me.

  “What? You thought she was hot,” I slammed my beer down on the bar, causing part of it to slosh out of the top.

  “She was jailbait,” he narrowed his eyes at me. “Besides,” he snickered, “I�
�ve never needed help getting women.”

  “You’re engaged to my cousin. You better watch it,” I leaned in closer. “I don’t want to have to kick your ass.”

  “Like you could,” he shoved my shoulder, causing me to lose my balance and almost topple off the stool. “I love her. I’d never do anything to ruin that.”

  “I know. Geez,” I rolled my eyes. “Just trying to get a rise out of you.”

  “Fine,” he huffed. “What is it that you need from me,” he stressed the word ‘need’ before finishing his beer and turning to face me fully.

  “Em says you’re going to visit her for the holiday weekend coming up.”

  “I am,” he nodded.

  “I’d like to bum a ride from you,” I smirked as the wheels in his head turned.

  “Why,” he cocked his head to the side.

  “I want to see my cousin,” I smiled a dubious smile, hoping he’d buy into it.

  “No, you don’t. I’ve gone to visit numerous times and you’ve never asked to come with me. Why now?”

  “That’s it,” I shrugged.

  “Em and I want some quiet time. We don’t want you there when we’re making up for lost time, if you know what I mean,” he rubbed his chin.

  “I don’t want to be there for that either,” I made a gagging motion. “I can keep her roommate company when you’re doing that.”

  “That would be difficult since she goes home every weekend,” Brock smirked. “Wait!” he slapped the bar. “That’s what this is about. You like her,” his grin widened.

  “I do not,” I scoffed.

  “Oh, you really like her,” he snickered.

  “No,” I growled, “I don’t.”

  “So the one woman that Aaron Sutter wants, doesn’t want him in return. Oh my god!” he broke out into laughter. “This is classic.”

  “Shut the fuck up,” I shoved his arm.

  “Fuck yeah, you can come,” he slapped the bar again as he chuckled. “I won’t even charge you gas money. I would pay to see this,” he waved down the bartender to order another round. “Wait til I tell Em.”

  “Can we not do that?” I shook my head. “I’d like it to be a surprise.”

  “Sure, why not?” he slid his card across the bar to start a tab. “Oh, this classic. I never thought I’d be witness to you chasing a girl.”

  “I’m not chasing her. She just doesn’t know what she’s missing yet. I’ll have her begging me by the end of the weekend.”

  “Right,” he mumbled around the lip of his bottle as he rolled his eyes again.

  Melinda

  “Where are you?” Emma was flopped across her bed talking on the phone when I stepped through the door. I knew it was Brock just by the goofy look on her face.

  “You know you’re pretty disgusting at times,” I rolled my eyes as I tossed my backpack on my bed. It bounced once before spilling open, causing papers and books to fall out. “Great,” I muttered as I crouched down the pick up what fell on the floor.

  “Come on up,” she giggled as she scrambled to a sitting position. She bounced a few times before there was a knock on the door.

  “That was fast,” I grumbled. I was in bad mood today, and watching Emma and Brock get all lovey dovey was not going to help. I had a project due at the end of the next week, and my mom was late coming to pick me up. I went home every Friday, and I didn’t have a car on campus. I wanted to get one, but I also didn’t have a job. My parents wanted me to concentrate on my grades, so they paid for school. They weren’t some rich couple, but they did well enough to make things better for me. With everything they did to help me, I felt like I owed them to do well. “I need to head downstairs and call my mom. Find out what’s taking so long,” I flipped my hand in the air as Emma opened the door to our room.

  I don’t think she really heard me, or put two and two together because all I heard was squealing before she launched herself into Brock’s arms. “Hello to you too,” he chuckled as he gripped her around the waist to keep from dropping her.

  “Later,” I waved as I attempted to get around them.

  “Hey. Where are you going?” his voice caused me to freeze. Why the hell would he be here? “Are you not even going to say hi?” Aaron was leaning against the wall in the hallway with his arms crossed over his chest.

  “Nope,” I pulled the strap to my backpack higher onto my shoulder as I kept my eyes pinned to the floor and sped up my pace. I wanted to get to the stairs before he caught up to me.

  “Can I ask why?” I felt a tug on my bag just as I got the door open.

  I sucked in a deep breath and blew it out in a hiss as I remembered the last time I’d seen him. He’d been leaning against the snack bar after one of his lifeguard shifts and some beach bunny had been on her knees in front of him. I’d spent the entire day there keeping him company, and he’d blown me off just so he could get blown. “What’s the point?” I glared up at him. “There’s nothing going on here,” I motioned between us as I stepped away from him. His eyes widened like he couldn’t believe that I was pushing him away before his feet jumped into action. The faster I ran down the stairs, the faster he chased me.

  “That’s not true,” he called out. “If you’d let me explain…”

  I turned around as I burst through the door at the bottom of the steps and rushed outside. I didn’t want anyone hearing me. It was none of their business. I liked to keep my life private now. My past taught me that. “I don’t need whatever it is you’re offering. I’m busy. I have more going on in my life than you could ever know. You aren’t what I need, and you never can be.” I stormed toward the corner where I always met mom, praying that she’d show up. She’d never been late before, and I was beginning to worry. The sun was setting, and it was starting to get cold out.

  “Where are you rushing off to?” Aaron was right on my heels. “You need a coat. It’s cold out here,” he started to remove his and give it to me.

  “What I need is for you to pretend that you never met me,” I wrapped my arms around myself and shivered. Right at that moment I saw my mom’s car round the corner. She weaved through the parking lot as she made her way to our meeting spot. I was saved at the last minute.

  “I came here for you,” his eyes looked hurt as he stared down at me.

  I looked up at Aaron one last time before opening the door to climb in. “You shouldn’t have. I can’t be with you,” I climbed in and forced myself not to look back. I made a mental note to check with Emma before I came back Sunday night. I needed for them to be gone and back in Wilmington before I came back. If I ran into Aaron again, I might not be strong enough to tell him no.

  Chapter 3

  Aaron

  My weekend was spent drinking and sulking, but mostly drinking. I couldn’t believe she could just walk away like that. I thought we’d had a connection last summer. At least, she’d acted like we did. Now, it all seemed like some elaborate fantasy that I’d dreamed up.

  I’d stood there on the sidewalk in front of her dorm staring at the taillights of her mother’s car until I couldn’t see them anymore. Students were milling around, some staring. It was then that I remembered that I was trapped. I’d come here with Brock. Brock was the one with the car, and as long as Emma let him stay, I was staying too.

  My head dropped as I shuffled back inside, in no hurry to go back to the love fest upstairs. I slowly climbed the stairs, and when I reached Emma’s door I leaned against the wall. I put off the inevitable for as long as possible, but when the neighbors began to stare, I knocked.

  Emma didn’t answer the door, but the knob turned, indicating that it wasn’t locked. “I’m coming in. You two better have your pants on,” I called out as I placed one hand over my eyes. It had been three weeks since these two had seen each other, and I knew the weekend was going to be spent mostly in bed for them.

  “You better stay just like that then,” Brock chuckled, followed by Em’s giggle.

  “I’m serious here,” I grumbled
.

  “So am I,” Brock returned, but then I heard the bed squeak and knew they were sitting up.

  “You’re clear,” Emma giggled again and when I removed my hand and blinked my eyes open I saw her pulling at her shirt like she was righting it. “She didn’t stay, huh?”

  “You knew she was leaving?” I balked.

  “She leaves every Friday unless she has a project that she needs the library for,” Emma rolled her eyes and shrugged. “I don’t really get it. I’ve tried to get her to hang out with my other friends, but she always makes an excuse and leaves.”

  “Is she seeing someone?” I cringed. The idea that I came out here to see her when she already had a boyfriend made my stomach crawl. I did not chase girls, and I wasn’t going to start now.

  “I don’t think so,” her lips pressed together. “There’s this guy, Roger. They met at orientation. He likes her, but he’s really shy. They’ve never been on a date.”

  I lowered myself onto Mel’s bed and groaned. Brock looked comfortable with Em snuggled into his side so I knew we were staying. “Do you know where she lives?” Maybe I could go to her house. Maybe she’d talk to me then.

  “Not exactly. I know it’s like a half hour away, but that’s about it,” Em flopped back. “Why?”

  “I was thinking maybe I could,” Emma shot up and held her hand up stopping me.

  “Don’t you dare,” she warned. “You don’t sound romantic. That’s stalkerish. She won’t tell me anything about her home life, why would she tell you?”

  “Well, I don’t want to stay here all weekend,” I grumbled.

  “And why’s that?” Emma smiled as she leaned her head against Brock.

  “Yeah, why?” Brock snickered as he wrapped his arm around her.

  “Because of that,” I waved my finger up and down in front of them. “I don’t care to see or hear whatever sounds are going to be coming from that side of the room.” I huffed as I resumed my position of staring at the ceiling. When I had flopped back on Mel’s bed the scent from her body lotion wafted in the air. Her blankets and sheets smelled like apple scented body spray. “Lying here isn’t helping me either. I smell her all around me. Let’s go somewhere, please?”