Not at First

by Phalla S. Rios

  “Ah, I thought we went over this already. The firm in Minneapolis is Marcus and Ellie’s, I am just overseeing the business, until he comes home.”

  “Where is he?” I ask.

  The noise becomes soundless all around the plane as my question slips off my lips. Tension fills the crowded space, thick, and choking.

  My eyes flit around to see everyone pretending to avoid my penetrating stare.

  “Baby,” Roman places his hand on my thigh. “We’ll talk about this later.”

  “Okay,” I trace my fingers down the back of his hand.

  “Aliss, bring us our dinner,” Roman calls to the flight attendant.

  Aliss sashays over with our food, she walks as if she is doing the catwalk, even around the tiny aircraft.

  Antipasto greets us on the plates she passes out.

  “Anything else for you, sir?” She bends sexily forward to pour more water into Roman’s cup.

  “No, that will be all, thank you.” He answers, deep and low.

  I notice a hint of nervousness in his eyes. Jealousy curses through my body. I’m not sure where this is coming from. Should I be jealous right now?

  I lean into him, my lips brushing his ears. “Did you fuck her?” I hiss.

  Roman grips my thigh. There is my answer.

  “When?” I whisper, lips still on his ear.

  “We’ll talk about this later,” he grounds out quietly.

  I lean away from him and excuse myself to the bathroom. There is a suite on the plane with its own private bath. I hold my head up high as I pass by Aliss, who gives me a knowing look.

  That bitch.

  My hands shake, trying to find the light switch to the bathroom, and then I slump onto the lid of the toilet.

  Convulsions rip through my body, shaking me from head to toe. This hurts. This fucking hurts. How can he do this to me? The answer I wanted, what he wouldn’t give me is, whether she’s before or after he came into my life.

  She’s recent, but how recent?

  Roman has stopped using condoms all together. He promised me he’s clean, and I trusted him. Now, I am a week late on my period.

  I bury my face in my hands.

  God, why am I so stupid!

  “Baby, unlock the door.” Roman demands, jiggling the doorknob.

  “Can I have a minute to myself,” I snap.

  “No, baby, you can’t. Now, open the door, before I break it in.” He growls.

  Roman has a temper, when he doesn’t get his way. I started to notice this during our weeklong confinement in his house together.

  I stand on jelly legs and hesitantly unlock the door. Roman barges in and presses me to the sink. His large frame takes over and I recoil into myself.

  “Baby, you don’t look well.” His face is full of concern. “Come.”

  He leads me out, over to the bed, and sits me down. He walks to the door and calls out for Aliss again.

  “Can you get me a wet cold towel,” he asks.

  She nods and walks off. Roman comes back to me and feels my forehead.

  “You are burning up.” He sighs. “Why didn’t you tell me before, we wouldn’t have come on the trip.”

  “And miss my chance to see Italy?” I say to lighten the mood, more for myself than him.

  Aliss brings over the towel and I furrow my brows. Roman’s hand slightly brushes hers and she lights up like a Christmas tree. Maybe I should just trip her.

  “Aliss, please close the door,” I order her.

  She turns around astonished and lifts her perfectly shaped eyebrow at me. Roman catches this while he is pressing the wet towel on my forehead.

  “Do what she says, or you will be finding another job the moment we touch ground.” He bites out.

  Without responding, she turns on her heels and closes the door on her way out.

  “Let’s lay down?” Roman suggests.

  “Yes,” I agree.

  I tangle my body with his on the bed and rest my head on his chest. He leisurely rubs his hands down my leg.

  “Will you tell me the truth about her,” I dare to ask.

  “The truth will hurt you. What you do need to know is I’ve been completely yours for a while now.”

  His words cut me to shreds and I sob into his chest. I told myself I wouldn’t cry anymore, but this is too much.

  Roman hugs me tighter.

  “Were there more?” I have no idea why I am even asking this question.

  “Yes,” he whispers.

  My world comes crashing down. I shake uncontrollably around Roman’s body and my tears soak up his yellow polo shirt that he wore just for me.

  “Baby I love you, it’s only been you for a long time now, and it’s going to be only you from now on.” Roman makes soothing sounds to try to calm me down.

  “I-I d-don’t k-know what to do anymore,” I say, choking through the lump in my throat.

  “Let me make it up to you,” he whispers.

  “I-I d-don’t w-want A-Aliss working for you anymore.” I wipe the tears off my cheek.

  “Yes, baby. I will tell her when we land.” He promises.

  Roman starts to massage my naked thigh brushing up and under my Alexander Mcqueen black and white honeycomb dress. His fingers graze my clit through my panties. I gasp and take in the passion he is creating on my body.

  “You’re so beautiful baby, especially when you’re like this.” His thumb rubs harder on my sensitive nub.

  “Like…what?” I rasp my eyes clouded over with lust.

  “I love the way you respond to my touch, the way your body shivers, and the way your eyes demand I give you what you want.” He growls, his hands move from the center of my thigh and he grips my ass, hard.

  I clamber on top of him, my legs straddle his hips, and I bow to him. He fists my hair with his big hands and hungrily latches his mouth onto mine.

  I let Roman entice my body away for the moment. My mind slips away, as he seduces me into oblivion.

  “We just joined the mile high club, love.” His husky, low deep voice brings me back down to earth.

  “Hmmm…” I murmur my body sprawled over his.

  He strokes and rubs down my naked body with his rough calloused hands. His hands rub circles deliciously on my skin, making my body weak.

  “Mmmm…” I moan.

  “We should get back to our guests,” he says with a gentle voice.

  “I’m the guest, family members are not guests.” I say arching my head up to gaze into his dark eyes.

  “You’re my family…” His voice trails off.

  My hand cups his cheek and my eyes lock with serious ones. “I love you so much.” I tell him.

  He responds back with a slap to my ass.

  “Ow,” I whine.

  “Get dressed,” he says, grinning.

  I slide, slowly down his body, stopping to run my tongue along his shaft and I climb off the bed giggling.

  “I will make you pay for that.” Roman comes up behind me and hauls my body back.

  “Only, if I let you catch me,” I laugh wiggling out of his arms.

  He doesn’t come after me; instead, he stands there with a funny look on his face. His lips twitch and, I can see he’s fighting back his smile.

  “Don’t just stand there, put on your clothes.” I quip.

  He throws his yellow polo shirt at me hitting me in my tummy. I immediately place a protective arm around my stomach.

  Roman arches his eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything, when he finishes putting on his boxer briefs and trouser he strides to me and picks up his shirt off the floor.

  “Is there something you need to tell me, Angel?” He shrugs on his last piece of clothing.

  “No,” I avoid his suspicious oculars and smooth out my dress before leaving the room.

  He follows right behind me and catches my arm.

  “Do not keep anything from me.” He warns.

  I spin around and glare at his hardened face. “You used to ask me nic
ely to tell you about myself. What the fuck happen to that guy?” I shout, forgetting we have an audience.

  “Don’t you dare…” He roars.

  “Don’t I dare…what?” I shrill.

  “You lost him, Angel. And, don’t forget the reason why.” Roman stuns me with his words.

  “Baby,” I try to mend things, but he is already walking away to our seat.

  His mom goes to him and they both start to talk in Italian. Ellie motions for me to take Maura’s seat, when she sees me standing, frozen in my spot.

  I slowly take awkward steps into the Lion’s den. My stomach rumbles as I pass Roman.

  “Baby, why didn’t you tell me you were hungry?” He stops me, before I sit down.

  “We were…kinda busy.” I say.

  “Aliss,” Roman calls out.

  She appears right away.

  “Bring the rest of our dinner.” He says without looking at her.

  He gets up and pulls me to my feet. He takes the seat instead and tugs me down onto his lap.

  “You are even more beautiful when you are angry. I love seeing the fire in your eyes, my love.” He tucks my hair behind my ear and presses his lips to my temple.

  I melt into him and our fight is over.

  I walk off of the plane smelling the unpolluted air and sigh. Roman takes my hand to an awaiting helicopter.

  “We leave one plane to the next?” I ask walking beside him.

  “It’s faster this way. If we take a car it will take us three to four hours to get there.” He straps me in the chopper.

  “But our luggage…” I protest.

  “Going in a car.” Roman takes a seat next to me as the rest of his family climbs in.

  The helicopter takes flight, cutting off all other questions from me. The view astounds me. Beautiful mountains and crystal blue ocean seas take up our scenery. I gasp and gape until we land.

  When I lay my eyes upon what Roman calls, his home, I am completely speechless. It is more than a house, more than a mansion. It is a castle on top of a mountain.

  “You live here, all by yourself?” I gape.

  “Soon, I hope you will join me.” Roman smiles and looks out to his estate.

  An older lady and gentlemen greet us in Italian.

  “My house managers, she takes care of the staff inside and he leads the team for maintenance in and around the house.” Roman explains to me.

  We all schlep up the cobblestone walkway to the house. Different color rocks line the exterior of the whole estate. Bushes and flowers swarm all around the front of the house.

  The inside has a touch of old world and modern décor. We walk past the main room and out to the back patio. There’s an infinity pool that over looks the mountain and green grass spreads out to two acres in front of us.

  We sit around wooden table and chairs. The house managers leave us to relax. Moment’s later refreshments come out to us.

  I take a sip of my lemonade, letting the cool liquid soothe my drying throat and I close my eyes.

  “Will you move back here, once you and Bella are married?” Maura asks her son, glancing once at me.

  My eyes pop open at the word, “move.”

  “Mama, don’t make Angel uncomfortable with your questions.” Ellie places her hand over her mother-in-law’s.

  “We’ll leave that up to Angel.” Roman answers

  “You should hire someone to oversee the firm, figlio. Once you and Angel are married she’s going to need you around more.” She says as if I’m not sitting across from her.

  “The firm will be run by me until, Marcus gets out.”

  Gets out.

  Get out where?

  I look to Roman to see his jaw muscle pop and his lips press firmly together. Ellie knocks her drink over splashing the lemonade all over the table.

  “Go get me a towel.” She orders her son.

  He leaves taking Sophie’s hand. He knows to leave us alone for a few minutes.

  His mom looks away with sorrow and regret playing on her face.

  “Angel, my husband’s in prison.” Ellie says, sighing. “He’s been gone for four years now and there’s ten years or so left of his sentence. And Sophie doesn’t even know her dad.” Ellie falls into her chair sobbing into her hands.

  Roman curses and goes to Ellie. He whispers in her ears, stopping her crying. Ellie’s sobs turns into sniffles, and she eventually dries her tears off her cheeks.

  Maura gets up and walks back into the house. Ellie leaves a moment later. Roman and I remain staring at the spilled lemonade.

  “I try to shield them from the pain of not having him here. I moved away from my home and took over a business I don’t care anything about.” He says staring off into the woods around his house.

  “Does he have any chance of getting out early?” I ask.

  “I’m working out the details.” He says moving his eyes back to me.

  “You’re amazing,” I mouth to him, afraid to say it any louder.

  “Come here baby.” He says.

  I move to him and take a seat on his lap. He wraps his arms around me and rests his chin on my shoulder.

  “Remember when we watched the sunrise together?” He asks, giving me small kisses on my shoulder.

  “Yes,” I whisper.

  “Now, we will watch the sunset together.” He murmurs.

  It’s Thanksgiving Day.

  It has been pouring rain for the past four days. We tried to play games to pass the time, but by the third day, everyone is irritable and moody.

  Roman and I spend most of our time in bed, if I wasn’t pregnant before I am sure I am pregnant now. He became insatiable after learning I was not on birth control. I’d try to fake being tired, but he would do things to me repeatedly, turning my body against me.

  The sun shines brightly through the drapes and I rub my eyes to wake them.

  “Baby, wake up! It’s not raining!” I shriek nudging him gently on the side of his body.

  He wakes up and grabs my wrist and rolls on top of me. He hikes one of my legs up, bending it at the knee, and he rocks his hips into me.

  “Roman, I’m sore,” I plead.

  He drops down and nuzzles his face into the curve of my neck. “Did I hurt you last night?” He whispers.

  “No, I like you…rough.” I answer honestly.

  He leaves my neck and trails light kisses down my body, sucking a nipple into his mouth. His tongue swirls around and around, he lets go by grazing his teeth on my erect tip.

  I buck underneath him and moan out my pleasure. “Please…” I beg, not sure for what.

  “Let’s get up now. I might not be able to stop myself if we continue.” He rolls off me and carries me off the bed with him.

  He deposits me into the shower and kisses me before he leaves.

  I take the quickest shower I have taken in my life and leave my hair wet. I throw on a white cashmere sweater and slip on dark skinny jeans.

  I trample down the stairs and stop. No one is around. I walk the main floor to the patio door and smile. My future family sits around the wooden table and is again eating breakfast.

  Roman looks up and smile, “Baby, they made your favorite.”

  I beam and strut to my seat. I find a plate fill it with French toast, bacon, eggs, and fruit in a little cup, next to my orange juice waiting for me.

  “Angel, play hide and seek with us. I don’t want to play with Sophie alone.” Marcus speaks with a full mouth.

  “Marcus Duke Conti Jr.” His mom warns him.

  Marcus swallows and mutters. “Sorry Mom.”

  “What are you doing later?” I ask Roman.

  “You play with them, baby. I have some business to catch up on.” Roman takes a sip of his coffee.

  “Then we will take Angel to the shops in the next town over.” Ellie tells him.

  “Will you make it back in time for dinner?” Roman asks annoyed.

  “Son, let Angel have some breathing room. We will be back in ti
me for dinner.” Maura says, eyeing her youngest born.

  “Andres, will be driving.” He grinds out.

  “Andres, is here too?” I ask.

  “Yes, he’s here to take care of business for me.” Roman massages the back of my neck.

  He angles his head close to my ear. “Promise me you’ll stay close to them, Andres will keep you safe.”

  Safe?

  “No questions.” He finishes.

  “I promise.” I say.

  His phone rings taking him away to the edge of the pool. The kids bounce in their seat waiting for me to finish eating.

  “May I be excused?” I ask.

  “Bella, go.” Maura smiles.

  I take the kids to the front of the property, to avoid disturbing Roman on his business call. Marcus is the first one up. Sophie runs to hide behind a bush and I take off running down the driveway to the Maserati Kubang. I climb into the back of the SUV closing the hatch, gently.

  I don’t know why I am choosing this spot, Marcus will never find me. Maybe I do need some air from Roman and his family, because I haven’t had time to myself like this in a long time.

  A few minutes later, someone opens a door to the car and gets in. I pop my head up ready to tell that person I am in here. However, seeing who the driver is, I crouch back down.

  I will surprise him, when he gets out of the car.

  He drives for a long time, often taking calls and speaking in Italian. He snaps and growls into the phone. Business is driving him insane.

  He stops the car and I peek out the window. We are stopped in front of a tall iron gate. There are guards standing at the gate with guns. I clamp my hand down on my mouth from making any noise.

  The guards open the gate to let us in. The place looks like a compound, with middle size homes spread out. There are people walking around as if they are in a hurry to get somewhere and there are other guards with guns posted at every building.

  Roman stops the car in front of one of the smallest houses. He gets out and goes inside, leaving the front door open.

  My heart drops to my stomach.

  There’s a blond hair girl about my age sitting slumped on a bed, crying. Roman yells at her and drags her to her feet. He gets in her face and yells some more, and then he drops her back onto the bed.