by Tess Summers
“I think it’s a quick girls’ weekend.” Ben was a great friend and tried to change the subject. “How’re things going at home? Things going okay with Adriana? Are you still trying to make it work with her?”
Luke sighed. “I don’t know. It sounds great in theory, but…”
Ben filled in the rest. “But there’s that pesky problem of being in love with someone else.”
“Exactly.” Luke gave a humorless laugh. “But I gotta tell ya, being a dad is the best thing to ever happen to me. I look at him sleeping and am in awe he’s really there. I can’t believe how much I love him already, and I’m having a hard time not wanting to strangle her for keeping him from me for over three fucking years. To her credit, she’s remorseful. She cried the other night and told me how sorry she was, she knows what a mistake she made.”
“That’s good. Right? Why do you have that look on your face?”
Luke grimaced. “Because after I hugged her and thanked her for telling me that, she started stroking my dick.”
“Oh shit! Did you fuck her?”
The SWAT sergeant shook his head. “No, which pissed her off. I know it’s only a matter of time before she pushes the issue again.”
“So,” Ben shrugged, “fuck her.”
“You’re an asshole. It would complicate things in the long run. Besides, I don’t even know if I could get it up, I’d be thinking about Cassie the whole time.”
Again, his former roommate shrugged like the answer was simple. “So, close your eyes and pretend she’s Cassie. Just don’t say the wrong name when you bust a nut.”
Luke couldn’t help but chuckle. “Fuck you.”
Even if he wanted to, Luke could never pretend his wife was Cassie. Cassie had her own unique scent and touch. Her hair always smelled of lavender, and her perfume intoxicated him. Her skin was like silk, like her hair was when he had it fisted in his hand while she sucked his cock deep in between those luscious, kissable lips. Her tits were the perfect size for his hands. Actually, her entire body fit his perfectly. And the little noises she’d make when he was seated deep inside her…
Great, now my dick is getting hard.
“I miss Cassie so much, Ben. I’d give anything to have her back.” Even Luke didn’t miss the desperation in his own voice.
“So, get her back.” His friend seemed to think all the solutions were simple today.
“Even if by some miracle, Yanna gave me a divorce and custody of Lucas, I don’t think Cassie would be interested anymore. I’ve got a lot of baggage now, and my son has to be my priority.”
“Have you talked to Adriana about a divorce?”
“The first night. I tore the divorce papers up when she arrived, but when we were talking later, I suggested revising them. She said if she wasn’t married, she’d have to return to Mexico with Lucas. The threat wasn’t very thinly veiled. I’m going to bide my time, for now.”
“What about fighting her for custody? Getting Lucas one hundred percent of the time?” his friend asked bluntly.
“I’ve thought about it, but I don’t think a judge would grant me custody when I’ve only known my son two weeks. Besides, I don’t want to keep him from her, he needs his mother in his life. But if we have joint custody, I worry she’d take off again to spite me.”
“What about Cassie? Couldn’t she be his stepmother?”
“She doesn’t want kids.” Luke sadly shook his head and took a pull from his beer. “Besides, she’s never going to forgive me; I broke her fucking heart.”
“Along with yours,” Ben murmured, doing his best to be supportive.
The cop let out a long breath and ran his fingers through his hair.
“I’m so fucking lost without her, it’s not even funny.”
His best friend looked at him sympathetically. “I wish I had the solution for you, brother.”
“Yeah, me too,” he responded in defeat.
****
Cassie
While sitting in Brenna’s kitchen one afternoon almost a month later, she reflected how easily Luke seemed to have moved on with his wife and child. On one hand, she was glad he hadn’t tried to get in contact with her. His words would have only served as a sadistic torture—comforting in a sad, pathetic way by letting her know he still cared about her but reminding her she couldn’t have him. On the other hand, it hurt at how effortless it had been for him to forget about her.
It was serendipity she was thinking about that when, out of the blue, her sister said, “Cooper wants to know if it’s okay to call you.”
She thought about it a long time. What was the point of moping around over Luke anymore? They weren’t getting back together. If he had wanted to be with her, he would have found a way by now.
If a man really wants to be with you, he’ll make it happen, no matter what.
He hadn’t made it happen.
“I’ll send Cooper a text this week.”
That brought a smile to her sister’s face. “Good. I think it’s time for you to get back out there.”
“It’s only been a month, Bren.”
“About as long as your relationship lasted. I think there’s a rule—you can’t mourn for longer than you dated.”
She knew her sister was trying to be light-hearted and cheer her up, and she even knew Brenna had a point, but for some reason, the realization of how little time she’d actually had with Luke hurt, and she lashed out.
“We were together longer than a month, thank you very much. And I thought we were in love; he even asked me to marry him. Something most people think is kind of a big deal.”
The look on Brenna’s face made Cassie feel terrible as did her sister’s unnecessary apology.
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry.” Her sibling came around the island and hugged her. “Of course, it’s a big deal. I wasn’t trying to be insensitive. I hate seeing you like this, and I don’t really know what to do. You’re supposed to be my badass little sister who doesn’t fall in love or take any shit. I’ve never had to deal with heartbroken Cassie before. I’m sorry, this is all uncharted territory for me.”
Cassie snorted. “How do you think I feel?”
“Well,” Brenna smirked, “you look good, anyway.”
“Thank you.” With a sigh, Cassie squeezed her older sister tight. “For everything. I’m sorry I snapped at you.”
“Don’t give it a second thought. Don’t ever forget how amazing you are, okay?”
They pulled apart, and Cassie smiled. “I’ll try not to. Thanks for the reminder.”
“That’s what big sisters are for.”
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Luke
He had lunch with Ben again. His friend was the only one he trusted to confide in.
“I’ve thought about texting her,” Luke confessed. “Maybe I could introduce her to Lucas, see if she’s interested in getting to know him.”
“And what if she is?” His friend looked at him skeptically. “You’re still married. I thought you were going to try to make it work with Yanna?”
“We both know that was a crock of shit.” Luke was exasperated. Ben, of all people, should know better.
“Maybe you should sleep with her, man.”
He closed his eyes. “She came on to me again the other night.”
“Okay, well, that’s a start.”
“I couldn’t get it up,” he confessed.
“Is that new?” Ben chuckled.
“Fuck you.” Luke grinned, wadded his napkin up, and threw it at the mechanic, then quickly shook his head with a frown when the gravity of the situation struck him. “I don’t know what to do. I want my girl back, but I can’t lose my son. Why can’t there be a simple damn solution?”
“Well,” his friend grimaced, “I debated about telling you this, especially since you seem so down, but I owe it to you. Your girl is bringing me all kinds of business—of the Marine variety.”
“What do you mean?” Luke snarled.
“Well, you
know her brother-in-law has been bringing his sweet ‘Vette in, then some other jarhead showed up the other day in his vintage Gran Torino. It was fucking beautiful, man, like Starsky and Hutch. You should have seen it…”
“The Marine, Ben. Get to the part about the Marine.”
“Oh, yeah, sorry,” the mechanic chuckled. “Anyway, he mentions Ron referred him, so I don’t think much of it until Cassie comes into the lobby, and he says, My ride’s here.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Luke sat up straight in his seat. “Cassie picked up some guy from your shop? What was his name?” He already knew the name but needed it confirmed.
“Cooper… Johnson. I remembered it because it reminded me of Cooper Tires.”
“Did you talk to her?” he asked, probably a little too eagerly.
“Fuck yeah, I talked to her. You aren’t the only one who misses her, ya know.”
Luke sighed, his tone melancholy when he replied, “I know. Did she…”
“Ask about you? No. But that’s probably because of the guy. I could tell there was a lot more she wanted to say.”
He knew his friend was trying to make him feel better. Luke was almost afraid to ask the next question because no matter how Ben answered, it was going to suck. He did, anyway.
“How’d she look?”
His best friend eyed him for a beat before answering, “Fucking radiant, man.”
Luke winced and closed his eyes. While he wanted to be happy for her, the truth was he had been holding onto the glimmer of hope there was still a shot for them, somehow, someway. He knew she was going to move on, he practically forced her to with his bullshit lie, I need to try to make it work with Adriana. Maybe this was the gods’ way of letting him know he needed to do just that.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Luke
The call from the secretary of the Heroes of San Diego planning committee was a surprise.
“Hey, Frannie, what’s going on?” he greeted the older lady who seemed to be connected to half of San Diego.
“Luke, my dear, how are you?”
“I’m doing great. To what do I owe the pleasure?”
“Some unfortunate business, I’m afraid. I was making follow-up calls with all the winners from the auction event, and it seems you have not honored your commitment, Luke Rivas.”
That caught him off-guard. He didn’t like being accused of not keeping his promises.
“Well, I don’t know if the winner is interested in going on her date with me, Fran,” he confessed.
“Strange, I talked to her this morning, and she said the same thing about you.”
“Huh. Okay—”
She cut him off, “Look, Luke. I don’t know what’s going on, and if I’m being honest, I don’t really care. What I do care about is being able to truthfully advertise next year one hundred percent of the auction winners had a fun date with their hero. So, I’m going to need you to make that happen for me.”
Luke didn’t know much, but he knew the last person in San Diego he wanted to have pissed at him was Francine Ericson, Federal Court Judge Robert Ericson’s wife.
“I’ll take it care of it, Frannie,” he promised before hanging up.
****
Cassie
She was expecting Luke’s call after hanging up with Francine Ericson but didn’t anticipate it would come so soon. She let it go to voicemail since she was a little busy peeing on a stick. Cassie listened to his message while she paced her condominium, waiting for the results of the test she just took.
“Seems I owe you a date,” his deep voice said with a chuckle.
Simply hearing his voice should not make her feel this happy. Especially since her gut was filled with dread when she glanced at the thermometer-looking thing sitting on her bathroom counter.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Cassie
The two little pink lines appearing on the stick was the ultimate irony. Or God’s cruel joke. She was in her car, headed to Brenna’s before the pregnant lines mocking her life even reached their full shade of pink.
“Oh, honey. What are you going to do?” her sister asked sympathetically.
Cassie took a deep breath. “I don’t have any idea, Bren. This is the cherry on the shit sundae that is my life right now.”
“Well, I can tell you if you decide to keep this baby, you need to start looking at it as a blessing. This negative energy will affect her. She will feel everything you’re feeling.”
“In that case, I definitely shouldn’t keep it ‘cuz this kid would be screwed,” Cassie groused.
“Would it really, Cass?” Brenna softened her tone. “Let’s look at this objectively. You’re freaking loaded, more than capable of providing for a baby as a single mother. Your kid will be gorgeous and talented. You’ve got a great support system, including a baby daddy who would be active and involved in his child’s life, and a sister who would be the most doting aunt on the planet. Which, oh, by the way, the house next door is for sale. And you can’t see it yet because the hurt is too fresh, but that baby was made in love.”
“This baby was made while I was living a lie. It’d be nothing more than another obligation to Luke now,” she choked out as tears started streaming down her face.
“Oh, little sister.” Wrapping her arms around her shoulders, Brenna hugged her tightly. “Luke was an idiot, I can’t even defend what he did, but don’t ever doubt he loved you. Maybe you didn’t get the ending you wanted, but this baby might be exactly what you need.”
The Rolling Stones’ “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” immediately began rattling around in her head. Damn you, Brenna.
Wiping her eyes as she pulled away, Cassie asked, “So, you think I should have it?”
“Oh, no,” her sister shook her head, “don’t put that on me. This is a deeply personal decision. It will affect your life far more than it will mine. Only you can make this choice because you’re the one who has to live with it whatever you choose. However, I will say this, I think before you decide anything, you should talk to Luke.”
“I’m not talking to him until I’ve decided,” Cassie’s tone became defensive, “and only if I decide I’m keeping it.”
There was no judgment in Brenna’s voice when she replied, “That’s your right, honey, but I think you’d regret it someday if you didn’t talk to him.”
“Fuck my life,” Cassie said as she buried her head in her hands.
“It’s going to be okay, little sister, I promise.” Brenna rubbed the middle of Cassie’s back in broad circles. “Do you know how far along you are? How much time do you have to make a decision?”
“I’m at least eight weeks since the last time we were together was the night he asked me to marry him, but I guess I could be as far along as eleven weeks.”
“So, you still have some time to decide. Are you leaning one way or the other?” Brenna delicately asked, hugging Cassie around the shoulders again.
Cassie shook her head sadly. “I’m so fucking shell-shocked by this, Bren, I don’t even know which way is up right now.”
“There’s no rush, honey. You’ve still got plenty of time.”
“Plenty of time for what?” Ron asked as he came into the kitchen from the garage. He was obviously coming from work since he was dressed in his fatigues.
Brenna brought her hand to her chest in surprise. “I swear to God that damn new garage door opener is so quiet, I never know when you’ve gotten home anymore!” she admonished Ron as if him arriving without them hearing was his fault.
“You want me to call the company and see if they can install a noisier one?” he asked sarcastically, then kissed his wife hello on the lips, not waiting for a reply to his hypothetical question.
“Hey, Cass. Everything okay?” he asked, eyeing her with concern as he set his gear down.
She shot a panicked look at her sister. Brenna read her mind, replying, “She’s still upset about Luke. I said she’s got plenty of time to heal before she starts da
ting again.”
The Marine general looked at his sister-in-law thoughtfully. “I thought you went out with Cooper already?”
“No, he needed a ride from Ben’s shop while his car got worked on, so he took me to lunch. I’m not ready to date yet. He was cool about it.”
“Don’t rush it, Cass. You’ve got all the time in the world. Unless…”
Don’t say it, please don’t say it.
“Are you worried about your biological clock ticking?”
Once again, her sister swooped in to save the day. “Don’t be silly, babe. That’s not even on her radar right now.”
“I was just askin’, I didn’t know,” Ron defensively teased with eyes wide and eyebrows raised as he opened the refrigerator and pulled out a Pacifico beer bottle. He opened the top and wrapped an arm around his bride as he took a swig. The two of them were a perfect unit together, so much in love. It was almost a crime it took them so long to find each other.
Maybe she’d find her own Ron Thompson someday although that was probably going to have to wait until she was in her fifties after her kid was in college. She didn’t think she’d want to date anyone seriously until then.
The thought startled her. Well, I guess that answers that.
“Actually, Ron, you’re going to be an uncle.”
Chapter Forty
Luke
The minute he saw Cassie’s name on his phone, his heart started hammering in his chest. Fortunately, he’d just arrived at work and was alone in his Jeep, so he could talk without anyone overhearing him. He’d called her two days ago, so he was beginning to wonder if he was ever going to hear back from her. After the way they’d left things and hearing she was dating Cooper, it wouldn’t have surprised him if she’d ignored him altogether.
He hadn’t brought himself to change her Hot and Beautiful name, but he did disguise it to HBD Sullivan—short for Hot and Beautiful Doll Sullivan. Luke was a little surprised she was calling instead of texting.
“Hey, doll.”