Ever Since Eve (The Keeping Secrets Series, Book 1)

by Pamela Browning

  After the ups and downs of the historic project, the people of Wrayville might not be in any mood to accept an outlet mall in their midst. Eve was an insider there, and she could talk up the benefits. The mill building would be renovated, and instead of being a blight overlooking the town, it would be an asset. The outlet mall would offer employment for many people. Other businesses in town would benefit as well because the mall would draw people off the nearby Interstate, and many visitors would need lodging and food.

  Derek was correct in saying that nothing could right old wrongs, but it meant a lot that he was doing his best to alleviate the economic pain of ordinary people like Al and Nell and, well, like her. She was proud of Derek for assessing a problem and coming up with a viable solution. Sure, the new Wray Mills Outlet mall would almost certainly make money for Lang Industries, but Derek deserved credit for taking the risk. And it was a risk in these economic times.

  The nurse on duty outside the nursery glanced up from the paperwork on her desk as they stepped out of the elevator. She was someone they knew from previous visits, and she smiled with pleasure when she saw them.

  "Derek. Eve. You've chosen a good time to come." She stood up and beckoned. "Follow me."

  Through the window they saw an aide cuddling a bundle wrapped in a blue-and-white checked flannel blanket, and she was holding a bottle in her hand.

  "It's Dob," Eve breathed, recognizing the unmistakable shape of Dob's head, the sparse tuft of brown hair on his head.

  "Would you like to feed him?" the nurse asked with an inquiring look at Eve. "We've taken him off the tubes. He's taking all his nourishment by mouth."

  "I—I—"

  Derek closed his eyes in relief. He'd been hoping for this day when Dob would eat on his own. It meant that they'd passed a significant checkpoint in his development, and he reached for Eve's hand.

  "Of course you want to feed him," he said.

  Once properly garbed, they entered the nursery. The aide wordlessly stood up and handed the bundle to Eve. Eve's heart swelled with love; her chest felt so full that it hurt. Dob wriggled; he moved his legs restlessly, and his tiny seeking mouth rooted for the nipple so recently removed from it.

  "Oh, Derek," she said, tears in her eyes. But they were happy tears, and she saw a suspicious glaze in his eyes, too.

  Eve sank down on the rocking chair, cradling Dob against her breasts, and inserted the nipple into Dob's mouth. With a sigh of pleasure, he began to suck at it, his eyes fixed steadily on Eve's face.

  There was no way she could have imagined the euphoria of holding Dob in her arms, to feel again bound to him as when he had still been a part of her. His cheeks had filled out, and although they weren't plump, he was no longer wrinkled. Someone had combed his hair into a peak down the middle of the top of his head. He was more than a bit of raw tissue; he was real, he was beautiful, he was Dob. He was a miracle.

  His eyes drifted closed as the round cheeks worked at the nipple. A thread of milk ran out of the corner of his tiny rosebud mouth. Derek reached down and wiped it away with a corner of the blanket. Derek's face was absorbed, and in a quiet way, joyful. But Derek would never be bound to this baby the way Eve was. Never.

  "He's all right. Derek, he's really going to be fine. Do you want to hold him?" She glanced up at him.

  Derek shook his head. He smiled tenderly at the two of them. This baby's existence had once torn them apart, but now he was uniting them.

  "Not this time," he said gently. "I'd rather watch the two of you together. I've never seen a more beautiful scene."

  His words touched her heart with gladness, but they did not speak to each other again. There was no need to talk. One heartfelt look conveyed everything that needed to be said.

  * * *

  No one was awake at the Myers Park house when Eve and Derek tiptoed through the back door. Aunt May didn't expect them back for a few more days; anyway, it was late, and Aunt May usually retired early.

  They were still riding on an emotional high, elated from their visit with Dob. Even so, Eve felt her heart still when they reached her bedroom door.

  Derek held her hand in his. "I don't want to leave you," he said. His eyes seemed very dark in the dim light from the landing. "Seeing you holding the baby meant so much to me, and I felt something for you that I've never felt before. I never want to be without you, Eve."

  "Maybe you don't have to be," she said. She found herself inclining toward him so naturally that she saw no point in stopping. Her forehead met his chin. He put a finger beneath her chin and lifted her face until he was looking full into it. He drifted his fingers across her features, committing them to memory. And then she lifted her mouth to his, the lips slightly parted, and he slid his arms around her, delighting in the rightness and perfection of it.

  His mouth met hers, and their lips together felt right and familiar even though they had only kissed once before.

  After all they had been through, their sharing of grief and guilt and joy, after circumstances had so irrevocably blended their lives, she wanted to be with him forever. With him and Dob, who might be Kelly's biological child but would always be her own son.

  Derek pulled her tightly against him. This night, they could not be apart. It was as simple as that. Without a word he opened the door to her room and drew her inside, closing the door softly behind him.

  "Eve, I want you to know I love you."

  She placed a quieting finger across his lips. Her voice was warm and rang with a new confidence. "I know. And I love you. At first it didn't seem right. I couldn't be sure if it was real, and if it wasn't real, I couldn't admit to it, but now I'm sure, Derek. Very sure."

  He smiled at her in the dark. "So am I," he said and his head bent to hers again, absorbing her in a kiss that took her breath away.

  When finally they broke apart, he slid his hands around to the buckle of her belt.

  "May I?" he whispered.

  Slowly she nodded. He unfastened the belt, then moved his hands around to the tab of the long zipper at the back of her dress. When he tried to slide it, it wouldn't budge.

  "Oh," Eve murmured. "It gets stuck on the ruffle sometimes." She lifted her hands and found the tab, and his hands remained over hers as she tugged it loose. Then he slowly edged the zipper slide down and down, past her waist, over her hips until he felt the silkiness of the undergarment beneath.

  Eve shrugged out of the dress, letting it puddle into folds on the floor. She stood before him, pale and white, in her slip.

  He eased the straps over her narrow shoulders and kissed her shoulders one by one. Then he shimmied the slip down around her hips, letting his hands rest there for a moment as he captured her lips in a kiss, then allowing the slip to fall around her ankles.

  She wore a bra that crowded her breasts, still swollen from childbirth; she had had a shot after the delivery to dry up her milk because she wouldn't be nursing Dob, but her breasts remained full and round. Derek knew, he understood, and he was gentle as he unhooked her bra, removing it before touching her reverently and then pressing his lips to each dark peak, one by one.

  And then he slid her panty hose downward, and she gracefully lifted one leg and then the other as he knelt at her feet, and when he stood again, he caught his breath at the absolute beauty of her in the light from the street lamp outside the window.

  Silvery marks marred the smooth white skin of her newly flat abdomen. Carefully, tentatively, he caressed one with an experimental finger.

  "These?" he whispered.

  "Stretch marks," she breathed, aroused by his touch. "From Dob."

  "They won't ever go away, will they?" His voice sounded anxious.

  "No." Her eyes on his face never wavered. "It doesn't matter." Suddenly she felt elated; she had borne this man's child, and she was proud of it.

  He knelt again and gently kissed each mark. She closed her eyes against the sweet torment of her desire for him.

  He stood again, holding her loosely within
the circle of his arms. "It's too soon after the baby to really make love, isn't it?" he asked her gently, kissing her earlobe as he did so.

  "Yes," she murmured. "But we can—"

  "I know," he said, lifting her in his arms and striding to her narrow bed. He laid her carefully there as though she might break, and his eyes caressed her as he took off his clothes, too.

  She lifted up the sheet and blanket for him to come to her, and he laid down beside her, absorbing her warmth, the softness of her body, the pleasure of their skins touching. He drew her into his arms and murmured her name over and over into her fragrant hair.

  "I love you, Derek," she said, her lips hungry for him, for all of him.

  "And I, you," he said unsteadily. Newly wise in their love for each other, they knew better than to say all the words, so in this time and space they spoke no more of their love. The peace enveloping them was as pleasant as their caresses, as soothing and as meaningful as their love itself. With a passion so tender that Eve thought her heart would break with the joy of it, Derek made love to her until their exhaustion overcame their euphoria, and finally they slept, entwined in each other's arms.

  When the morning sun broke through the trees, Derek reluctantly slipped away to his own room.

  "Because," he said lovingly as he sat on the edge of her bed to kiss her goodbye, "for your sake, I want to keep up appearances for Aunt May. Until we get married, that is. Will you, Eve? Will you marry me?"

  For a moment he was afraid. What if she said no? Because of Kelly, because they were from different backgrounds, because of a hundred and one reasons why he wasn't good enough for her.

  Eve smiled and reached up to pull him down to her, sliding her arms around his neck. "Yes," Eve replied, her voice thick and warm. "Yes, my darling. I'll marry you. As soon as we can."

  Chapter 13

  Eve Triopolous married Derek Lang on a balmy day in March in a short private ceremony in the garden at the home of the groom. Her father, looking spiffy in his best suit and coughing very little, attended with Nell Baker, who wore a new lavender dress for the occasion. Aunt May, who was touchingly overjoyed, donned her best three-and-a-half-inch rainbow-striped high heels with her teal-blue suit, and she even bought a new battery for her hearing aid so as not to miss any of the ceremony. Doug Ender was there, and Derek's friends, the Kleinsts, and Jay Stanley, came, too. Derek's parents flew in from out of town, and though surprised at this turn of events, his father declared that he loved Eve on sight. His mother professed that she was delighted to meet her first grandchild. His sister declined their invitation due to previous travel plans.

  Eve was almost late for her own wedding when she barely restrained Dob from spitting up all over her beautiful white wedding dress. Fortunately, disaster was averted when Louise grabbed him just in time.

  Eve and Derek stood beneath an arbor to take their vows with their guests looking on.

  "And will you, Derek, love her, comfort her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health—"

  Why, he already has, Eve thought.

  "I will," Derek said, and his eyes upon her face shone with commitment and love.

  "To have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part." Eve's eyes, shining with happiness, never left Derek's face.

  Derek drew Eve tenderly into his arms and kissed her gently on the lips. And she clung to him, overwhelmed with happiness.

  "Champagne in the dining room for anyone who's interested," Derek said, and after collecting Dob from Louise, who had held him during the ceremony, they all trooped in for a toast proposed by Doug Ender.

  "To Derek and Eve and Dob in their happiness," Doug said, holding his glass high. Everyone raised a glass, and Derek beamed at his wife and son.

  Louise passed dainty sandwiches on which she and Aunt May had collaborated, and a cornered Doug listened patiently to Debby Kleinst's glowing description of her unmarried sister.

  Aunt May held an interested Nell Baker in thrall. "Did you see the last episode of Love of Hope? The hockey player told Susan about the computer hackers who penetrated the bank records, and—"

  "Evie, you look so pretty. And the baby's a cute little fellow, isn't he? You know, it's nice to have a grandchild. It really is. I wish your mother—"

  "Psst, Eve, come in here. I haven't told you I loved you since before the ceremony. It's been at least half an hour. Do you have any idea how much I love—"

  "Derek, stop it! Aunt May or somebody will walk in this pantry any minute, or Louise asking if we want something to eat!"

  Derek took her hand and pulled her past the dining room to the heirloom cradle beneath Kelly's portrait in his study. He picked Dob up, and Dob looked up at him open-mouthed.

  "Look, Eve, he smiled! He did! He has Kelly's mouth. Remember I told you that one day in the hospital?" Derek sounded genuinely pleased.

  Eve gazed at her son. "Kelly's mouth but definitely your nose."

  Derek laid Dob gently in the cradle and watched as his son energetically pumped his legs. Then Dob yawned widely and sighed as his eyes drifted shut.

  He was such a good baby. Eve wanted to be with him every minute, but Derek had suggested that she continue to coordinate publicity and marketing efforts for Wray Mills Outlets.

  "We'll convert one of the guest rooms to an office for you. Dob will be nearby, and you can be with him whenever you like."

  At first Eve was reluctant, but when Louise suggested that her niece, an experienced nanny, would be delighted to come over every day to help out, Eve accepted Derek's offer. She'd missed her work, but this way, she could be a working mom and a stay-at-home mom at the same time. It seemed like the ideal situation.

  "You know," Derek said with a glance out the window, "it's almost time for Aunt May's pansies. See the little green sprigs in the flower beds? Remember she planted them in the fall to bloom in the spring?"

  "Yes," Eve said, recalling the day. "I wondered how those fragile little plants would ever weather the winter." To be honest, she'd worried about how she was going to weather the winter and especially how she'd manage to leave the baby behind when spring came, because at that time she had hoped that Derek would keep the baby. Back then she had never dreamed that he would keep her also. Well, the pansies had weathered the winter, and she had, too. They were both stronger than they looked.

  She turned within the circle of Derek's arms and rested her head on his chest. She closed her eyes and let the sweet comfort of his embrace enfold her. She felt so safe, so happy, and the feeling made up for everything that had happened in the past.

  "I'm never going to leave you again, Derek."

  "You'd better not. It isn't in the plan. And in this case, there's no alternate plan, either."

  Eve lifted her head and smiled at him, and then they laughed together. After one last quick but heartfelt kiss, the two of them hurried arm in arm to join their wedding guests.

  And in his cradle, Derek Robert Lang, Junior slept on, blissfully unaware for the time being that his life, his existence, his very being, was a true miracle of love.

  The End

  Want more from Pamela Browning?

  Page forward for a special Book Club invitation

  followed by an excerpt from

  THROUGH EYES OF LOVE

  The Keeping Secrets Series

  Book Two

  The Keeping Secrets Book Club

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  Questions for Ever Since Eve

  Eve Triopolous has lost her job and financially supports her father, who is ill. In her desperation, she decides to become a surrogate mother. Would you? Have you ever considered it?

  Eve likes the Langs immediately. Within a short period of time, Kelly becomes like a sister to her. Are Eve and Kelly more alike than they thought? Why or why not?

  Eve's relationship with her
father is strained after she decides to be a surrogate mother. How does the secret that she's keeping from him affect their relationship?

  After Kelly dies, Derek makes a decision. Even though he believes it's the right one under the circumstances, Eve can't go along with it. How does he react when she stands up to him? Why?

  Eve's personal moral philosophy causes her to make a serious decision as well. Feeling as she does about keeping the baby, should she stay in the house with Derek? Does she put herself at risk by leaving? If so, how?

  When Derek finds Eve at the L & D Café, he is shocked that she is still pregnant. How do you think Derek felt at the moment that he realized that she was still carrying his child?

  Eve reflects that somehow she has become the parent while her father has become the child in their relationship. Was Eve primed to feel that way because of all the responsibility that she took on after her mother died?

  Was it heroic on Eve's part to be willing to support Derek and Kelly's baby if Derek would not? Let's discuss this.

  After Dob is born, Eve feels sad that she'll have to leave him. Is that normal in this situation? How would you have felt?

  Page forward and continue your journey

  with an excerpt from

  THROUGH EYES OF LOVE

  The Keeping Secrets Series

  Book Two

  Excerpt from

  Through Eyes of Love

  The Keeping Secrets Series

  Book Two

  by

  Pamela Browning

  Award-winning Author

  Somewhere West of Los Angeles

  February 2009

  Cassie stared in horror at her husband, who was unconscious and slumped over the yoke of their small plane.

  "Kevin? Kev?" She shook his arm, but he didn't respond. The plane's single engine continued to drone as though nothing had happened. Outside was darkness overlaid with stars—no earth, no horizon, nothing.