A Dangerous Love 5: No Love Lost

by J Peach

  This a greedy hoe!

  I stared at her with a duh look. “Yes, I’m taking my food and I’m going to eat it all up by myself. Then I’mma get naked and go to sleep. Is that fine with you?” I asked her that, all the while walking towards the stairs.

  “Not a problem. Night, Peaches.”

  The only reason she let it go was because her phone started ringing. I hoped she didn’t think I was trying to be mean or anything, I just wanted to be alone.

  Everything that had happened caught up with me a few hours prior and I just wanted to be by myself.

  I didn’t want to think about what happened with Blaze and the mess with Ebony and King. I didn’t want to deal with any of it.

  It all was too much for one person to deal with.

  A laugh soon left my mouth as Blaze popped into my mind. He was such an ass asking me to spend the night. Setting my food on the nightstand, I opened the drawer.

  The hunger I felt left as I sat on the bed playing with the black diamonds on the chain. With a sigh, I laid the chain down and stripped out of my clothes. After I tossed them in the basket, I threw on one of Blaze’s white beaters and got in bed.

  As I lay there, my fingers once again found the chain. I wanted to forget about what we had, him all together. I didn’t like feeling alone, hurt or weak, feeling like everything was over. Even though I knew it wasn’t, that didn’t stop the lonely, hurt feeling I felt every day.

  I don’t understand how I could pretend so well during the day, but once night fell and I was alone everything returned.

  Why couldn’t I pretend when I was alone? Pretend I didn’t care at all. Why did I have to feel so weak, so vulnerable?

  Why did it have to hurt so much?

  Why couldn’t I just pretend I knew nothing?

  Pretend that I was blind to his lies?

  Why did it hurt so much?

  So many why’s, but not one answer to any of them.

  I balled up in my covers and silently prayed for easier days and painless nights until I fell asleep.

  Chapter 21

  Peaches

  The constant ringing of my phone woke me up. Not looking at the screen, I answered, still asleep. I didn’t say anything, just sat the phone on my ear before slowly starting to doze off.

  “Peaches?”

  “Hm?” I remember saying, then nothing after. The sudden loud ringing in my ear had me jumping awake. “Hello.” I answered groggily.

  “You sleep?”

  Hearing his voice woke me up more and I looked at the phone to make sure it was really him.

  “I was, what’s up? Is everything okay?” A yawn left my mouth as I looked at the alarm clock on the nightstand.

  “No, nothing’s wrong. I’m sorry I woke you, didn’t think you would be asleep this early. The Peaches I knew was an all-night party girl.”

  “Ron, why are you lying? I only partied hard when I wasn’t in school. Since I am, I only go out maybe once a week, if that.” Another yawn left my mouth. “I’m sorry,” I apologized to him and laughed as I yawned again.

  “It’s cool, go back to sleep and call me when you get up. Bet?” Jerron said.

  After stretching and yawning, I turned on the lamp then sat up against the head board.

  “Hello?”

  “I’m here, I was just sitting up. So Ron, why are you calling me at eleven o’clock at night?”

  “Peaches, go back to sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow.” Smacking my lips, he laughed. “So I woke you up? I’m sorry, I ain’t want shit. I just got in the crib and you popped in my mind.” His deep voice went low as he spoke smoothly.

  I rolled my eyes at that. “Hm, is that so?” I asked, making him laugh.

  “Yeah, it is. So you went back to school? What for this time?” Ron questioned, seeming genuinely curious.

  “Nursing.”

  “That’s what’s up, but ain’t you tired of school? It seems like you ain’t taking no breaks from school. You just jumping back in once you’re done. You know what I mean?” He asked.

  I knew exactly what he meant. I finished high school at sixteen. It wasn’t long after that I registered at the community college to be a Medical Assistant. It took me two years to get my Associate Degree. It wasn’t long after that I started at IUN for Nursing.

  “Kind of. I was thinking about going back after I graduated. I’ll stop going once I get to where I want to be I guess.”

  Ron started laughing as I said that. “Ain’t nothing wrong with it. As long as you’re getting to where you want to be, it’s good. What you thinking about going back for?”

  “Surgical Tech. After that I think I’m done. I’ll be working in a hospital, hopefully under some handsome doctors,” I told him.

  “Under huh?” He hummed with a double meaning.

  With a smack of my lips I laughed. “Not like that, you perv. But then again, maybe a doctor could be what I need,” I spoke truthfully with the way I’d been feeling lately.

  “Oh, so you want a doctor?” He asked.

  “Not necessarily, but it’s better than a fuckin’ hood. So if the opportunity presents itself then I may take it. That’s some years away, though,” I said laughing.

  “You’re right, that’s years away. Until then, tho, you should let me take you out.” My brows furrowed at that. I didn’t think starting something new with anyone was a good thing right then, especially not with Jerron. Ron and I together were never good at times. “Peaches?” He called through the line.

  “I’m here. Ron, I don’t know. I mean, I just got out of this thing with Blaze that I’m not over and getting back into a relationship is something I’m not ready for, you know. Jerron, you know how we are whenever we get together. And I’m not ready for that,” I told him truthfully. “Plus, you’re King’s boy and I done messed with two of his friends so far. I’m not tryna be a homie hopper,” I joked about him being King’s friend, everything else was true.

  Ron burst out laughing. “Damn, Peaches. That’s messed up. You fuck’d with two of his homies?”

  Smacking my lips, I laughed. “Not really. I dated one and the other was just a friend. He’s nice, tho. The nice one and I kind of messed around before I got with the homie—”

  “Blaze, I know. So the nice one tasted Ms. Sweet before you got with Blaze, right?” He asked.

  “Right, like always. Now, see why this won’t work?” I stated.

  “No, I don’t. King and I are friendly, not friends, Peaches. We met and then you introduce me to King. I ain’t meet King until you. So messing with friends is not happening, you don’t have to worry about that.”

  He had a point there. He was like Leon, didn’t really involve himself in the street life. They’d rather work at a dead end job than turn to the streets. Ron was working at U.S. Steel Mill before he left Gary and moved to St. Louis.

  “Peaches, the only reason I was at the Rex today is because King said you’d be there,” Ron explained, causing a groan to leave my mouth. “Don’t do that, we’ve known each other too long for that. I’m not asking you to jump into a relationship with me. Maybe one day, but not now.

  “I’m not rushing you. If you need time then take it, as long as you need. But I wanna kick it with you even though you’ve been avoiding a nigga hard as hell. You been dodging me like we ain’t never been best friends once upon time,” he blasted me.

  A small smile spread across my lips. Maybe this was what I needed. Not necessarily a new man, but a new male friend, someone not Sam.

  “You are one of my best friends and I have been dealing with a lot. I’m sorry about dodging you, Ron.” Hearing him hum had me laughing.

  “It’s cool, as long as I can take you out that is,” he bargained.

  “Only as friends you can take me out. Nothing serious and no Ms. Sweet. Just friends, that’s all I need right now, a friend with no drama,” I said while turning off my light and scooting back down in my bed.

  “I wasn’t asking to play with Ms. Sweet now
anyway, you suggested it. A friend I can be, tho. Are we going to fall asleep on the phone like we use to do?” Ron said, making me laugh.

  How could I ever forget about Ron? If I had been ballsy enough and wasn’t so afraid of King there’s no doubt I would’ve ended up with Jerron.

  Ron was just a laid back, sweet and funny dude. Even though there were good things, he could hurt me.

  “No, we’re not sleeping on the phone. You can call me when you get up in the morning.” A yawn left my mouth.

  “Well, you can talk to me until I’m ready to fall asleep,” Ron insisted until I let out another yawn. “Or until you fall asleep on me.”

  “Shut up.” The line went silent. A giddiness started to form in the pit of my stomach as I held the phone. “Ron, I’ve really missed you.”

  “I missed you too, Peach,” he replied back. “I missed you a lot…” He trailed off, causing a smile to come to my lips.

  I hoped this was God’s way of answering my prayers for easier days and painless nights.

  For the next five hours we talked about the old days, how I use to sneak out the house just to meet up with him or sneak him in my parent’s house when they were out or sleep.

  Ron was four years older than me, around King’s age. So us hanging out when I was fourteen and fifteen wasn’t going to go well with any one. So there was a lot of sneakiness going on when I was younger.

  Even though he was Leon’s brother, that didn’t matter. King wasn’t having any guys hanging around me, ever.

  “Ron, I’m sleepy,” I mumbled into the phone which was tucked between my ear and pillow.

  “Me too, you talk too much,” he said, causing a sleepy laugh to leave my mouth.

  “Bye, Ron.”

  “Morning, Peaches,” it came out as a sleepy mumble and the line went quiet. “Peaches,” Was the last thing I heard as I fell asleep without a thought of Blaze in mind. I felt so content.

  Ron was safe.

  Safe was exactly what I needed.

  Chapter 22

  Peaches

  Six Weeks Later

  “Dr. Harris, Nessa, I’m gone. I’ll see y’all Monday,” I said, finally shutting down the computer I was on.

  “I’m right behind you. Bye, Dr. Harris,” Vanessa called out, grabbing her purse and following behind me.

  “See you girls, be careful out there,” Dr. Harris said, walking us to the door. Once we left, she closed and locked it.

  “See you, Peaches.”

  Waving bye to Vanessa, I went to my car. As I pulled out of the parking lot, a blue truck drove past and I let out a groan.

  Every time I saw a damn blue truck my mind immediately went to Blaze. It had been almost two months and I hadn’t heard from or seen him. That didn’t seem right, Blaze always called and harassed me. No matter how many times I told him to stop, he didn’t. But as of lately I hadn’t heard from him at all.

  If it wasn’t for Bianca telling me he was alright, I’d have been worried that he’d gone out and done something stupid. I was glad he hadn’t bothered me, but at the same time I didn’t want him out here getting into trouble.

  Without Blaze constantly calling, without his drama period had been a relief for me. Even though I missed him and still hurt, it was best for me. I knew it’d take some time before I was over him completely, even so, I wasn’t going to let it cripple me. Everything about our relationship wasn’t all bad so I was safe from becoming a vindictive bitch that hated all relationships and men.

  I’d just been so relaxed lately, the pain of letting Blaze go was still there, but it wasn’t constant and nagging.

  As soon as I turned on my street a smile came to my lips. The Sliver GMC Yukon Hybrid parked on the street had me slowing down with that smile spreading wider across my lips. I pulled into the driveway, turned off my car and got out.

  “You know this is considered stalking, right?” I called out to Ron as he hopped out of his truck. Laughing, he met me halfway up the driveway.

  “It’s not stalking if I was invited.” After embracing him in a short hug, we pulled back.

  Ron had been an amazing friend for the past month and a half. I still couldn’t bring myself to understand how I managed to and wanted to forget about him, nevertheless, I would never make the mistake of losing touch with him again.

  He had helped so much in the process of dimming the hurt I felt whenever Blaze came to mind. I no longer felt as if I was going to burst into tears whenever his name came up or when he was simply a mere thought. I had actually accepted the fact we’re probably never getting back together. Before, it was just a thought that I hadn’t fully accepted. With having lunches with Ron and our nightly phone calls, I realized that there were really sweet men out there.

  One of which is Jerron.

  Even so, I had to be careful with him. He might have been safe, but in the end Ron could hurt me. He had once before.

  “It’s stalking when you’re just sitting in front of my house without my knowledge of you here. Which brings me to say I don’t remember inviting you over here.” My lips formed into a pout and my arms crossed under my chest as I waited on his reply.

  Those pretty hazel eyes stared hard at me for a second before he suddenly turned and walked back to his truck. My brows rose as I stared at his retreating back.

  What is he doing?

  It wasn’t until he had gotten in his truck and started it up that I realized he was leaving. Oh, my God, he thought I was serious.

  Coming to that realization, I called out to him. “Ron!” The moment his name left my mouth he sped off so he didn’t hear me. I covered my mouth and just stood there looking in the direction he went.

  How could he not tell I was only playing?

  He probably thinks I’m a bitch.

  The ringing of my phone pulled me from my thoughts. I grabbed it from my pocket and Ron’s name flashed a across the screen.

  I answered. “Ron I was—” My words were cut off as he started talking.

  “Hey, Peaches, how you doing?” He questioned, causing confusion to set in my body.

  “Fine, Ron I—” Once again he cut me off.

  “That’s good, how was work?” He continued to question.

  What?

  I was really confused now. “It was okay. Hey,” This time when he cut me off I couldn’t help but laugh.

  “I’m on yo side of town and was wondering if you were still up for doing something with me tonight, like we planned?” He was playing. Rolling my eyes, I shook my head. “Hello?”

  Laughing, I leaned against my car.

  “Yes, I’m still up for it. Ron, why you—” I started to asked why he was playing, but he cut me off.

  “Is it okay if I come by now or do you want me to wait? I don’t want to just pop up, appearing like a stalker.” As he was saying that he pulled in front of my house. “Last night you did tell me to be here when you got off—”

  I hung up the phone and beckoned him forward so he could pull in the driveway. Doing as I instructed, he turned off his truck and got out. “I fuck’d you up when I pulled off, didn’t I?” He asked.

  Shaking my head, I laughed. “No, you didn’t.” He gave me a knowing look and I hit him. “You play too much. I was thinking you thought I was serious, had me feeling bad.”

  “Good, you shouldn’t have tried to play me.”

  I didn’t reply back, I took hold of his hand and lead us into the house. Once we were inside, I kicked off my shoes and dropped my keys in the bowl that sat on the square table by the front door.

  “Same old Peaches, purple everything.” Ron laughed while looking around. “This nice though, got you a little bar.” He walked over to bar and sat on a stool.

  “Thanks, King got this place for me. Even had someone to decorate it for him. This was all King.” I sat on the stool in front of him.

  “That man spoils yo ass. He do know you’re not his child?” He joked.

  “No, I seriously don’t think he knows
that. He doesn’t even want to admit I’m grown. King only spoils me a little. Even though he claims he didn’t get this place, I know he’s lying. King’s ass is sneaky like that.” Shrugging, I met his eyes and laughed before looking away from him.

  “So we still on for tonight?” The excitement in those hazel orbs of his made me groan. “Don’t be groaning, you gon’ punk out on me?”

  With the excitement bouncing around in those eyes, hell I was tempted. “Where are you taking me?”

  He stood and pulled up his jeans. “I’m not telling you, but I’ll show you. Come on.” He grabbed my hand.

  I looked down at my scrubs then turned my gaze back on Ron. “I have on my work clothes, can I at least change?”

  He gave me a once over and then shrugged. “Peaches, ain’t nothing wrong with what you’re wearing, but if you want to change you can. I can’t stop you,” he stated.

  “Come on.” Grabbing his hand, I pulled myself from the stool.

  This was Ron’s first time in my house since we’d started talking again. We had always met for lunch. With me having to be at school on certain days and him working, we really didn’t have a lot of time to hang out. But we texted a lot and talked on the phone constantly, hell, all night.

  After showing him around downstairs, we moved up to the second floor where the rooms were, then up the three little stairs to my space. First place I took him to was the balcony.

  “I have a backyard.”

  Walking out, Ron looked at me and laughed. “I see, this is nice. King out did himself on this place, for real. That’s not a surprise, though, you baby sis.”

  Smiling, I turned away from him and went back inside.

  “Make yourself at home, I’ll be back in a few.” Walking to my room door, I pushed it open.

  “I can’t see that one?”

  I glanced over at Ron and rolled my eyes. I ignored him as I walked in my room and closed the door behind me. I could hear his laughter from the other side of the door before hearing the TV come on.

  Not wanting to keep him waiting too long, I took a quick whore’s bath and brushed my teeth. Once done in the bathroom, I went back into my room. I grabbed the baby oil and rubbed a little on my body to give it a slight glow.