Hopelessly Devoted to You

by Jill Steeples

  Tall, broad and achingly handsome in his designer suit, he was so much more than a gorgeous bloke in a suit, Ruby knew. He was sharply intelligent, funny and hugely entertaining, qualities that weren’t lost on Amber either, judging by the way she was hanging onto his every word. He’d been all of those things before the accident but it was only now, having seen a different side to Finn in the last few weeks, a more real and vulnerable side to his character, that Ruby was beginning to uncover the true depth of her feelings for this man.

  She couldn’t drag her eyes off him. Impatience filtered through every fibre in her body; what could he and Amber have been talking about all this time? She needed some alone time with the man in her life, a few minutes to tell him the news she should have told him a hundred times before.

  ‘Finn!’ she said again, more sharply this time.

  ‘What?’ His gaze addressed her and she felt a cool chill of terror run the length of her body. He was looking into her soul, picking her apart. She knew everything she held dear could be lost in a moment. She hoped to God it wasn’t already too late.

  ‘I need to speak to you,’ she said.

  ‘Later,’ he said, his expression serious, as though he’d just remembered something of vital importance. ‘I need to speak to you about something first.’

  He turned to say something to Amber, clearly excusing himself from their conversation.

  ‘What is it, then?’ she asked, when he turned to face her, feeling unnerved by his tone and the unspoken urgency in his voice. Her resolve weakened as she tried to ignore the stirring of disquiet in her stomach.

  ‘Not here. Let’s find somewhere quieter.’ He took her by the hand and led her back into the hall. They wandered down a side corridor, finding an empty reception room. ‘Sit down,’ he ordered her.

  Now he was scaring her. He sat down opposite her on a red chesterfield sofa, leaning forward, resting his forearms on his knees, looking at her intently. For the first time since he’d come out of hospital he’d lost his carefree and relaxed attitude and it was almost as if the old Finn was looking back at her, about to deliver some bad news of his own. She half expected his public school accent to make a reappearance to match the serious expression.

  ‘I want you to tell me, Ruby, honestly, what happened on the night of the accident?’

  ‘Oh!’ She sighed a deep breath, her mind racing in all directions. Where had this come from? What did he know? Had he suddenly remembered everything?

  ‘The night of the accident?’ she repeated as though she didn’t have the first idea what he was talking about.

  ‘Yes.’ He edged forward in his seat. ‘What happened?’

  ‘What’s this all about, Finn?’ she asked, leaning forward, matching his pose. ‘You know what happened. We spoke about it.’

  ‘Yeah, you told me about the fall, but you didn’t tell me what happened before that. I know we had a meal and some champagne, but what I don’t understand is why I was leaving your flat at that time of night. What was it, about ten p.m.? Where was I going?’

  ‘Um, you were going home, Finn, that’s all.’

  ‘But why was I going home? It was a Friday night. Wouldn’t I have been staying over with you? What happened to make me leave at that time? Did we have a row or something?’

  Oh, God. She shifted uncomfortably on the sofa, her legs feeling sticky beneath the fabric of her dress. She couldn’t lie to him. Not when he’d asked her straight out. But she couldn’t tell him the truth either. Not here, not now.

  ‘Not exactly a row. We’d been discussing the wedding. I think we were both tired, that’s all. It had been a long week. To be honest I can’t really remember all the details; it’s all kind of a blur now. The accident is the thing that sticks in my memory.’

  It was halfway towards the truth. He nodded sagely as though he was mulling over her words, his gaze fixed hard upon her.

  ‘Right. Sounds like you’ve got the same problem as me, then. Remembering stuff. It’s a bugger, isn’t it?’ His lip curled up at the corner, but there was no way it could be mistaken for a smile. Something in his tone unsettled her. He clasped his hands in front of him, his gaze unwavering, as though he was about to pronounce his damning verdict. Guilty as charged, she suspected.

  She’d drunk far too much champagne. Nausea rose in her throat as a waft of light-headedness swept over her.

  ‘Where’s this come from, Finn? Why is it so important all of a sudden?’

  ‘It’s not. It was just when I was speaking to Amber it suddenly occurred to me, that’s all. I hadn’t thought about it before. It just seemed strange that I would have been going home at that time. I don’t understand.’

  She had to tell him. It wasn’t fair to keep him in the dark any longer, not when he’d asked her directly. She hadn’t imagined it would be here, like this, but she had no other choice.

  ‘Well, the thing is…’

  The door swung open with a jolt, causing them both to startle.

  ‘Oh, this is where you’ve been hiding,’ said Caroline, a big smile on her face. ‘Come on, you’re needed. Owen is about to make a little speech just before we go in to dinner. You don’t want to miss out on all the excitement.’

  Chapter Seventeen

  ‘Ladies and Gentlemen!’

  Owen Richardson’s voice rang out around the grand hall.

  ‘First of all I would just like to welcome you all here tonight for what is a celebration of another hugely successful year for Richardsons. I know I speak for all the partners and directors when I say how proud I am of the continually high standards we meet on an ongoing basis. The feedback I receive from our clients shows me that our excellence and commitment is very much valued and one of the many reasons our clients, old and new, remain loyal to us in these difficult times. I know too we couldn’t achieve that level of service if it wasn’t for you, our talented and extremely hard-working staff across the company.’

  Owen raised his glass of champagne to the air.

  ‘To the continued success of Richardsons!’

  A boozy cheer erupted from the assembled crowd as everyone raised their glasses in return.

  ‘I’m not going to keep you long. I know you’re probably as anxious as I am to go and eat the magnificent banquet that’s awaiting us next door, but I would like to take this opportunity to welcome back one of our much-valued members of the team, Finn McRae.’

  An even bigger cheer reverberated around the room.

  ‘As you know, Finn suffered a very serious accident a few weeks ago, and it was an extremely worrying time for everyone concerned when he was in hospital, not knowing if he would make a full recovery.’ His face took on a grave expression and he lowered his voice. ‘Really, it was that serious. To see him back with us tonight, with his beautiful fiancée, looking in the peak of health is a truly wonderful moment. What you won’t know is that on the day of the accident, with some serendipitous timing, I’d actually had a meeting with Finn when he accepted my offer to become a partner of Richardsons.’

  ‘Nice one!’ someone called out from the back of the room, followed by more cheering and a huge round of applause.

  ‘I really do hope it wasn’t the bottle of champagne we shared that afternoon, Finn, that contributed in any way to your later fall.’ Owen laughed. ‘Anyway as I say it’s great to see you here tonight and we look forward to welcoming you back to work very soon as the youngest person ever to be offered a partnership in the history of the firm. And should I say, with that very new and exotic accent of yours, which has proved to be a huge talking point amongst the female members of our team, we are truly delighted to have our first English-Antipodean partner amongst us too.’

  An excited buzz of laughter ran round the room. Ruby felt a huge swell of pride for her lovely boyfriend, who had achieved so much in such a short space of time and who was clearly admired and respected by everyone in this room.

  ‘Would you please join me in raising your glasses to Finn on his appointm
ent as Partner and to his lovely fiancée Ruby too on their forthcoming wedding. To Finn and Ruby.’

  She looked across at Finn, expecting to see his face flushed with pleasure, to share in this special moment with him, but his expression was stony. His head was inclined slightly, his gaze was on the floor and the set of his shoulders told her that whatever had been troubling him earlier was still causing him concern now. She edged alongside him and took hold of his hand, giving him a small encouraging squeeze of the fingers.

  ‘Finn, would you like to say a few words?’ Owen asked.

  Finn released his hand from hers, not meeting her eye, and made his way reluctantly to the front of the room. He was clearly rattled and Ruby could only put that down to what had happened earlier. Could he really have remembered the events of that night? Her heart was in her mouth as Owen moved over to one side so that Finn could address the crowd. Maybe they were all expecting too much from him too soon. They were seeing Finn as they remembered him, the hotshot assertive lawyer, but they had no idea how much he had been altered by the accident. They couldn’t know him as she did, didn’t know the way his confidence had been affected.

  ‘Thank you,’ he said, looking round the room, his huge wide smile lighting up his face, melting Ruby’s heart and the rest of the women’s hearts too, she didn’t mind imagining. Why had she ever doubted Finn? He always rose to the occasion whatever it was, and tonight would be no different.

  He stood tall, his shoulders wide, his presence compelling. The old Finn was back in business. He coughed, clearing his throat.

  ‘I just wanted to say a huge thank you to everyone for all the kindness shown to me over the last few weeks. Honestly, it’s been overwhelming. For all the cards and messages I’ve received, I give you my heartfelt thanks. In particular I am indebted to the firm—’ he turned and gestured towards Owen ‘—for their generosity and support, not only in these last few weeks but ever since I first joined the firm when I was straight out of university. Anyone close to me will know that becoming a partner is something I have dreamed about ever since I was a young man and to think that I have now achieved that dream at such a young age is both an honour and a privilege.

  ‘If you don’t mind, I would also like to take the opportunity to thank my girlfriend, Ruby, and my family, who have been an absolute tower of strength through all of this. Without them I’m not sure how I would have got through this.’

  At the mention of her name Ruby felt her cheeks prickle with pride. Suddenly she felt taller, with the eyes of the rest of the crowd on her. She looked up at Finn, hoping he might offer her one of his intimate smiles, but he was in professional mode now and his focus was clearly on the task in hand. He went on.

  ‘It’s not until something like this happens that you realise just what and who’s important to you in life. We spend so much of our time working too hard, striving to better ourselves that sometimes it’s all too easy to overlook the simple things in life; those things that we are all guilty of taking for granted. If there is anything I would urge you to take from my experience it’s that you shouldn’t waste any time worrying about things that don’t really matter. None of us knows what is round the corner and my accident showed me that life can change, like that.’

  He clicked his fingers to demonstrate his point.

  ‘Tell your loved ones that you love them. Write that book you’ve been meaning to write, visit that place you’ve always wanted to go to, if your heart is telling you to take a change in direction in your career then do it. We’re only here for such a short time so make the most of it.’

  Ruby had goose bumps on her arms hearing Finn’s inspirational words, seeing the rapt faces of the others in the audience.

  She basked in the warm glow of support and affection being cast towards Finn. To think that she’d just been on the brink of telling him what had happened that night when there was no need. It was as if she’d been saved from that fate by a higher body. Someone somewhere was looking out for her and Finn.

  This was the man she was going to marry and for the first time since her engagement she felt overjoyed at the prospect.

  A benevolent celestial being had dropped in from high up above and tapped her on the shoulder.

  ‘Yep, it’s okay, love. He’s the one. We were just having a bit of difficulty processing the paperwork. All signed off now though. I would draw your attention to Clause IV of Section 3.2 of our terms and conditions as there is a time limit on this application. You need to fully sign up, heart and soul, to this contract, pdq, by pledging your undying love to your intended or else the contract will be declared null and void. Pdq = next five minutes. If you don’t proceed with this application for finding your soul mate then we cannot guarantee that there will be any further future successful applications.’

  She felt an overwhelming surge of happiness. Wait till she told Laura! Wait till she told Finn! No, maybe not. Finn already knew everything he needed to know. They were engaged to be married. Wasn’t that everything?

  She smiled to herself, soaking up the atmosphere in the room. Maybe a few years or even months down the line she’d be able to confide in Finn and tell him how she’d wrestled with her doubts for such a long time, not knowing if he was the right man for her, and they would laugh and laugh about it. It would be a story they would tell in turns at dinner parties and Finn would joke how he’d almost had a lucky escape, but hadn’t quite managed it. And it would be a story they would tell to their children and then one day their grandchildren too.

  Her musing was interrupted by a change in tone from Finn.

  ‘That’s why what I am about to say next is very difficult for me. I am hugely honoured to count you, not only as my colleagues, but my friends too. The time I have spent at Richardsons has been challenging, but ultimately incredibly rewarding. I have grown so much both professionally and personally in these past few years and I really appreciate all the opportunities afforded to me.’

  Ruby saw his eyes flicker around the room before coming to rest upon her face, the tiniest of knowing smiles hovering around his lips.

  ‘I’m particularly honoured to be made a partner. It is the culmination of my dreams and for that I would like to give a huge vote of thanks to Owen and the other partners for their ongoing support and faith in me and my abilities. Sadly though, as much as I’m thankful for the opportunity, it is with a great deal of regret that I’ve decided I won’t be able to take up this appointment after all.’

  Everything stopped in that moment. The air whooshed out of Ruby’s lungs. She looked at Finn and the audience, disbelieving. An audible gasp went round the room and Ruby heard a woman’s voice break through the crowd.

  ‘Finn! What…?’

  When she saw the crowd turn as one to face her she realised the heartfelt scream had come from her. She closed her mouth, holding her hands to the air in a helpless gesture. She’d known something was wrong, but she could never have imagined this was in the offing. Tonight represented everything Finn had ever worked for and now it looked as though he was throwing it all away.

  ‘No.’ He held up his hand to stop Ruby’s outburst. ‘It’s fine, Ruby. We’ll talk later. All I can say is that I’ve thought long and hard about this and have decided, sadly, that I won’t be returning to work for Richardsons. This is a very private decision and is no reflection on the company or the time I’ve spent here, which has been frankly amazing. Thank you.’

  With that he gave a small nod of his head and stood down to an embarrassed half-hearted ripple of applause.

  Ruby looked across at Owen, who had adopted the same open-mouthed expression she’d been sporting for the last thirty seconds, before rearranging his features into a ‘business as usual’ expression, shrugging his shoulders in a carefree manner and addressing the audience briefly only to urge them to enjoy the rest of the evening’s celebrations.

  ‘All right?’ said Finn matter-of-factly, when he returned to Ruby’s side as though he’d just popped out to empty
the bins and now he was back. She looked at him, her gaze roaming his lovely familiar face. She wanted to grab his face in her hands and smother him with tiny kisses, but she knew the eyes of the crowd would be on her. If she needed any clarification that Part Two of Operation Love Me, Love My Dog was complete, then this was it.

  ‘Why did…? What made…? Are you absolutely…?’ She had a hundred and one questions fighting for attention in her head but she couldn’t form a coherent sentence out of any of them.

  ‘Absolutely,’ he said, walking away.

  ***

  ‘Finn!’ She ran after him, even more desperate now for some time alone with him, but they were being ushered through into the banqueting room and Finn was being accosted by a stream of people wanting to know what was behind his grand announcement. She felt an arm linking through hers and turned to see Owen steering her to one side of the room.

  ‘Ruby, don’t worry about that. What happened there with Finn. It’s perfectly understandable. Maybe I was wrong to make the announcement here tonight. Finn appears so fit and well, it’s easy to forget how much he’s been through. He’s made a great recovery, but he still obviously has a little way to go. Rest assured, his job is secure here for however long it takes. We don’t want to lose someone the calibre of Finn.’

  ‘Thank you, Owen,’ said Ruby, tears pricking at her eyes, relief rushing around her body. A myriad emotions flooded her body. ʻThanks for being so understanding. I had no idea at all. I’m as surprised as you are. When we get home, I’ll talk to him. See what it’s all about. Perhaps I’ll get him to give you a ring next week so you can talk it through.’

  ‘Whatever you think’s best, Ruby. I just wanted you and Finn to know that his job here will always be open for him.’

  ‘Thanks.’ She leant up to kiss him, wholly relieved that Owen had taken such an understanding view of Finn’s announcement. Not everyone would have done so in the same position. She was still trying to make sense of it herself. Was that why he’d been so quiet and subdued earlier? Had he been on the brink of telling her, but then decided better of it? She thought she knew him so well and yet just lately he had a habit of springing surprises on her.