Foolish Me

by Tinnean

  “Yes, he—”

  “Excuse me, please.” Wills had been chatting with Paul, but now he addressed the rest of us.

  “Wills?”

  “I’m going to introduce Paul to my dad and Jill.”

  “Okay, babe.” I waved him away and turned back to Mr. Mann. “So, how did you and Vince meet?”

  “Theo, we’re gonna dance.” Vince got to his feet and held his hand out. “Quinn?”

  Mr. Mann’s eyes lit up. “You’re asking me to dance?”

  “Yeah.”

  “With you?”

  “Jesus, Quinn. Who else would I dance with?”

  He rose and took Vince’s hand. “I’ll enjoy dancing with you.”

  I watched as they walked to the dance floor, both of them looking drop-dead gorgeous in their tuxedoes.

  “They do look good, don’t they?” Tim stood there. “C’mon, bridegroom. Dance with me. I want to hear what it’s like to be married.”

  I raised an eyebrow, but he winked and cut a glance toward Cris.

  “Ah, babe, you know I’d marry you in a New York minute,” Cris said. “I’ve asked him every week since you called to let us know you were getting married.”

  “But did you ask me this week?”

  Cris’s eyes lit up. “Timboy, will you marry me?”

  Tim laughed. “I’m gonna dance with Theo.”

  THE VENETIAN hour started, and waiters brought out pastries, fruits, cakes, and various coffees. I was sipping a cappuccino when I realized I hadn’t seen Wills for some time. I put the cup down.

  “I’m going to—” I looked up to see Wills suddenly there. “Where were you, babe?”

  He was in his shirtsleeves, and there was… I felt cold. How could there be blood on his shirt?

  “Is everything okay?”

  “Everything is fine.”

  I blew out a relieved breath. Of course it was. The smile on his face told me so.

  “Congratulations, babe.” He leaned down and brushed his lips over mine. “You’re a brother-in-law.”

  “What?” I got up so fast my chair tipped over.

  “Jill just had the baby. It’s a good thing Paul knew what he was doing. He delivered Peter William.”

  That was my boy. I checked my watch and gave a spurt of laughter.

  “What?”

  “Do you know what that means?”

  “Yeah, what I said.”

  “What time is it?”

  He looked at his watch. “It’s almost eleven.”

  I bumped his shoulder and began singing, slightly off key, “John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. His birthday is your birthday too.”

  His jaw dropped, and he stared wide-eyed. I closed his mouth with gentle fingers. “You’re right!” he said.

  Vince gave a huff of laughter. “This party is becoming too exciting for me. I’m going to say good night.”

  “Good night, Mr. Vincent. Thank you so much for being part of our day. And… uh… thank you too, Mr. Mann.”

  “As I told your husband, I enjoyed it very much. Thank you for allowing me to attend,” Mr. Mann said. “Congratulations, and I hope you have a long, happy life together.”

  “Thanks.” We all shook hands, and then they were gone. Wills looked around. “Where are Jar and Marti? I have to tell them.”

  “Marti’s dancing with one of the cousins, I think”—there were so many of them, and while Wills had introduced me to all of them, it was hard to tell who was who. Almost all of them were blue-eyed blonds—“and JR is still dancing with my sister.”

  “It’s too bad her boyfriend changed his mind about coming.”

  “Yeah, well, after pulling a stunt like that at the last minute, I have a feeling he won’t be her boyfriend for much longer.”

  “From the way your father talks about him, he likes him.”

  “It doesn’t matter. If Casey doesn’t want Alexander, I’ll back her up.” And that would piss Poppa off, but I wasn’t going to bring that up. “Pat’s dancing with Spike.”

  “Should we worry?”

  “I don’t think so. If Spike can deal with Hollywood, he can deal with Pat. Come on.”

  We crossed the floor to where Marti was dancing—with one of Harry and Brynn’s twins, as it turned out—and Wills leaned down and whispered, “Mom had the baby. They’re fine, but as soon as I let Jar and Pat know, and everyone else, we’ll be leaving for the hospital.”

  She gave a squeak of excitement. “Can I tell too?”

  “Sure.”

  “Come on, Davy! Let’s find Gram and Gramps! Then we’ll tell your mom and dad!” She took off, dragging her cousin along with her.

  We found JR and Acacia. “What was that about?” he asked, nodding toward his sister.

  “Mom had the baby. They’re both fine,” Wills repeated, “and we’ll go to the hospital soon.”

  “I’ll tell Pat!”

  “Thanks. I’m going to make a general announcement now.”

  He squeezed Wills’s arm. “I’m not the younger brother anymore!”

  “No, I guess you’re not.”

  “I missed so much.” I watched as JR darted away into the crowd, leaving Acacia standing there with a bemused look on her face. I patted her shoulder. “Would you like to come too, Casey?”

  “I’d… I think Mama and Poppa will want to go to our suite.”

  “Okay. We’ll see you tomorrow before you leave.”

  We went to the MC, and Wills gestured for him to lean down. “I need to make an announcement.”

  “That you’re leaving?” He grinned at him. “You’re supposed to slip out without telling anyone.”

  “Things are always done a little differently in my family.”

  He raised an eyebrow but handed Wills the mic and signaled the band to stop playing and then for the drummer to play a flourish.

  “Ladies and gentlemen. Dear family and friends. Theo and I are leaving.”

  There were hoots and catcalls, but they were good-natured. What a wonderful family I’d married into.

  “JR, Marti, and Pat are going with us.”

  That brought even more raucous responses.

  “God, you people are sick!”

  “But you love us anyway!” Harry shouted.

  “Yes, I do. But no, we’re not taking my siblings to Key West. We’re going to John T. Mather.”

  “The hospital?” Harry wasn’t laughing anymore. Brynn held on to his arm.

  “Yes. Jill’s been taken there. A little while ago she had her baby.” He looked around, and when he saw his Uncle Pete, he gave him a thumbs-up. Pete had been thrilled to learn this little boy was going to be named after him. “They’re fine,” Wills said for the third time. “We’re going to see them. The hall has been rented until midnight, so Theo and I would like you all to stay and enjoy the music and the Venetian hour.”

  “Guess what? I think you could have saved your breath.” The room emptied out as everyone went for their cars. “Is this what we can expect with our son, Wills?”

  “You bet! It’ll be an adventure, babe.”

  I slid my arm around him, and we just stood there for a moment. And then I smiled into his eyes and said, “Yes, I guess it will be.”

  Chapter 34

  AS SOON as we got back from Key West, Wills and his cousin met with the genetic counselor, had blood drawn, and then we settled in to wait.

  When Cathy and Lexi got those positions with the ambassador, Cathy made sure she left behind a supply of viable ova. Lexi left us the contact information for a surrogate who would carry the baby.

  IT HAD been a stressful autumn. Not only was Wills in and out of DC on the job, but while he was away, I’d gotten the news that Deety, JR’s black Lab, was deteriorating badly and quickly. After diagnosing Deety with osteosarcoma, their vet had given her a year to live. We’d all been surprised but hopeful when she’d gone past the year, but now it was obvious she’d have to be put to sleep. I was able to get in touch with my husband. He
flew into Logan from wherever he was, and I met him at the house in Cambridge.

  Wills, Jack, and JR were with Deety when Dr. Morse administered that final injection.

  The entire household was subdued, including four-week-old Peter and even Jill’s Bobtails.

  I watched as Wills held the baby. He was going to be such a great dad, while I….

  “Will you get another dog, JR?” I asked, mostly to take my mind off what a failure I was likely to be. I wasn’t surprised when he shook his head.

  “I know this was the best choice for her, but… God, it hurts!”

  Pat went to him before anyone else could. He didn’t offer useless platitudes, just pulled JR into a hug and ran a comforting hand over his back.

  We couldn’t remain with them too long, and after a couple of days we flew home, to be greeted with the news that our surrogate wasn’t pregnant.

  EACH MONTH that went by with no pregnancy made us feel the pressure more and more. With Cathy out of the country, the ova she’d left us were running low.

  “Don’t worry about it, babe,” Wills said. “We’ll just have your baby first.” The plan was to wait a couple of years before having our second child, which would be conceived using my sperm.

  But he’d wanted that baby so badly, as a reminder of his mother both for himself and his father, and I couldn’t blame him. Jack Matheson was a good man.

  WE LEARNED in the middle of January that Samantha Nelson, the woman Lexi had found to be our surrogate, was finally pregnant. We could see 2004 was going to be a busy year for us.

  Every evening after dinner, Wills would work on the baby’s room. I’d help as much as I could, but mostly I leaned against the doorframe and watched as he laid a new bamboo floor and painted the moon and stars on the ceiling.

  I’d always known that Wills wearing a tool belt rang my chimes, but it was a little disconcerting to discover that the sight of paint splatters in his dark-brown hair was a turn-on as well. I had those “lick me, suck me, fuck me” jeans down around his knees and him up against the wall before he realized what I intended.

  By this point I knew well enough that if he didn’t want any of this, he could physically take me apart. I loved that he let me manhandle him.

  God, I loved kissing him, and while I fed off his mouth, I curled the fingers of one hand around his hip and worked our cocks with my other hand.

  I’d just so happened to have lube in my pocket. It paid to be prepared.

  HAVING A guest stay on the couch in my office or Wills’s for a night or two was doable, but for the long term, it wouldn’t have been comfortable for Samantha or convenient for us.

  We’d been renting out the attic apartment as an executive rental property, but I contacted the company we dealt with and told them it would be unavailable for the next eight months. Wills didn’t have to do much to get it ready for our surrogate. Unlike the artist who’d just about trashed the apartment, the men and women who stayed for a few days or weeks treated it well. Wills set it up with an intercom in case Samantha needed us, and we moved her in.

  Wills was pleased with her because of her height, almost six feet in her socks. “I know it won’t have anything to do with the baby, but maybe that’ll give our little boy a boost.”

  I was pleased with her because she wasn’t a redhead.

  She never really became part of the family, but maybe that was as it should be, given the situation. However, she didn’t turn her nose up at the ladies downstairs, and they liked her for what she was doing for us. Even Miss Su got along with her.

  We joined Samantha at every appointment with Dr. Hung, her obstetrician. There was no way I was going to say a word about that name, especially since Dr. Hung was a petite woman of Chinese extraction.

  And when Samantha went for her first sonogram, we had the tech print out extra images so we each had one to carry in our wallets as well as mailing them to the families.

  Ma and Poppa were ambivalent about the coming baby, but Acacia was thrilled to be an aunt.

  “BABE, HOW in love are you with the Corvair?”

  “Excuse me?”

  “I want a safe car for you and the baby, and the Corvair is pretty old.”

  “What did you have in mind?” Whoever had owned it previously had taken pretty good care of it. It ran well and suited my needs, but once the baby came, we’d need something bigger, something with airbags and factory-installed seat belts, and with a roomy trunk for groceries instead of the engine.

  “I was thinking of buying the Dodge and giving it to you.”

  “Me?” Getting behind the wheel of Wills’s car, controlling that powerful engine… I’d driven us home in it from the airport this past spring, and while I’d been too worried about Wills at the time, now the thought of it scared me spitless. But he had a point. The Corvair was almost forty years old, and it had close to four hundred thousand miles on it. “But what about you?”

  “I’m in line to get a new car at work, so I’ll still have a Dodge to drive.”

  “I will miss the Corvair,” I said wistfully.

  “If you want to hold on to it, I can extend the garage, make it two cars in tandem, and we can leave it in there until the kids are old enough to learn to drive. And we can take the Corvair out occasionally to keep it in running condition.”

  But all I heard was, “Kids?”

  “Sure. We’re going to have more than one, aren’t we?”

  “You bet. But let’s have the first one first, okay?” He was going to be a great dad, but I still wasn’t certain about me.

  “Okay, babe. Now, why don’t we take the Dodge out so you can get comfortable with it?”

  “I’ve got a better idea. Suppose I pack up a picnic basket, and we drive out to the country, find a secluded spot, and fool around a little?”

  “Just a little?” That half smile titled up the corner of his mouth.

  “A lot works for me.” All this time together, and he still made me hard with a look.

  “Cool. Let’s get going.” He reached down and squeezed my butt. “You’re still going to drive, though.”

  “I WANT to name our son Teodore William,” Wills said one night when we were in bed. “For you and Gramps.”

  “But I thought the first son was named after both grandparents.”

  “Eryx John? Sorry, babe. I don’t think so.”

  I was relieved. Even after all this time, I wasn’t ready to forgive Poppa for preferring to tell the family I was a junkie rather than that I was gay. “What about John Eryx?”

  “There are a lot of Johns in my family. They’d wind up calling him Wills’s-and-Theo’s-John.”

  “That is a mouthful.”

  “I knew you’d agree. We’ll just start our own tradition.”

  “So Teodore William it is?”

  “You bet!”

  I was so grateful he’d even consider adding my name to our son’s that right then I’d have given him anything he wanted, and I told him that.

  “I have everything I want, babe. I’ve got you.”

  After hearing that, what could I do? I pulled him under me and made love to him all night long.

  FOR OUR first wedding anniversary, Wills surprised me with a trip to Cambridge. This time he rented a van, and we stopped at the big house, picked up the entire family, including Alice and Pat, and drove to city hall.

  Massachusetts had recognized same-sex marriages that past May. With the help of the company he worked for, we were able to be legally married.

  AT FOUR in the morning on October 11, Samantha’s voice over the intercom jerked us out of a sound sleep. “It’s time, guys.”

  “Okay, give us two seconds. Theo will meet you at the top of the stairs.” Wills had installed stair lifts for her early in the pregnancy. Three flights of stairs would have been too much, even though she said the exercise would be good for her. “I’ve got to take Miss Su downstairs.”

  “No hurry, but….” She groaned, and I felt the bottom drop
out of my stomach.

  “We’re hurrying!” I caught the shorts Wills tossed to me and almost tripped getting my legs into them. “Goddammit!”

  Wills, who was already dressed, stepped into a pair of jogging shoes and laced them up. “You okay, babe?”

  “Fine. I’m fine.”

  “Samantha’s been packed for the past two weeks, so don’t forget her bag. And don’t forget Teddy Bear’s either.”

  Before I could assure him I wouldn’t, he was out of the room, calling Miss Su.

  “Uh… Theo?” Samantha was on the intercom again.

  “I’m on my way!” I yanked on my jeans, wrestled with my shirt, and finally grabbed my Reeboks and bolted for the front door. Then I had to go back, because I’d forgotten the baby’s bag.

  I ran up the stairs, but Samantha was already halfway down.

  “Sorry.” I sat on a stair and got my jogging shoes on. “Okay, do you want me to carry you?”

  “No.” She laughed and patted the stair lift. “This baby has me.”

  “Right.” I laughed also, but it was halfhearted at best.

  She paused while she rested a hand on her abdomen and did the hee hee hoo breathing.

  “Bad?” I asked when she blew out a breath.

  “It’s better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick. But not by much. Here, take this, okay?” She handed me her bag.

  “How… how long?” I slid an arm around her waist and helped her off the lift and to the next one that led to the second floor.

  “A few hours.”

  “How far apart?”

  “Seven minutes.”

  “Uh….” I tried to think what else I should ask. “Did your water break?”

  “No.”

  I swallowed and eased her down onto the lift. On the second floor, the ladies gathered on the landing.

  “Good luck, Samantha. Good luck, Poppa!”

  “Yeah, thanks.” I gave them an absent smile. “Be good, Miss Su. Bye, ladies. How are you doing, Samantha?”

  “Don’t ask.”