PLAYING FOR KEEPS

by MacLeod, J. E.

  “Screw off, Parker, you alky,” Mac shouted back.

  “Cut it out,” Coach Cal jumped in. “Mac, go sit down and cool off. The reason we’re even still in this game is because of Chase, so keep it quiet.”

  “No way. Parker is smoking on the wing,” I piped up, before Mac could say anything else. I sat beside Josh and punched his shoulder. “Being sober agrees with your game, bro.” I smiled to show I was kidding around.

  “Screw that,” he said. “I’m so bored, I could spit.”

  Candy had officially dumped him, right before Mona’s funeral. Josh sat with Cassandra, Hailey, Jane, and me at the service, much too involved in his own drama to notice Hailey smiling at him. They let him out of rehab for a couple of days to attend the funeral, and he seemed surprisingly committed to not drinking.

  The turnout at the funeral was huge, with standing room only at the church. I think Mona would have been surprised to see how many kids cared. Who knows, maybe they were just curious. I guess when someone so young dies, it makes people reach out to each other, probably for comfort.

  There in the locker room, I continued teasing Josh.

  “Yeah, but you play hockey. You don’t need a life!” I needled him again.

  “Quiet, you two,” Coach Cal broke into our conversation to give us a heartfelt pep talk. I glanced over at Mac, then, grinning dramatically, I stood up and led the team in a cheer. Mac flipped me the bird as I yelled. I winked at him as the team roared in response and we all raced back to the ice.

  The period got under way fast. With the game tied 2-2, both teams hustled to get the puck in the net. We swore at each other, and dug our sticks into vulnerable body parts when the refs weren’t looking. We sweated, working it, but no one could score a goal in a clear net.

  Before I knew it, there was less than two minutes left. It was still a tie game. My line poured out on the ice: Josh, Mac, the defensemen, and me.

  “Zack Attack! Zack Attack! Zack Attack!”

  I heard the chanting from the crowd. I glanced over as I skated to the blue line for the puck drop. Hailey jumped up and down on the bench, leading the crowd in the cheer. I stopped skating for a moment, just watching. Jane sat quietly in the crowd behind her, almost as if she were holding her breath. I laughed to myself, watching their different reactions for a moment, until I heard the ref blowing his whistle.

  “Get over here kid, or I’ll give you a penalty for holding up the game,” he yelled at me.

  I smiled and skated over, sliding past Mac. “Pass the puck,” he hissed.

  “Bite me,” I said, and moved on.

  The ref lifted his hand and dropped the puck. I jabbed in and stole it. With the puck on my stick, I skated away from the others, over the blue line. In the clear, I took a shot.

  The goalie leapt across the net like a spider, trapping the puck in his glove. Then he threw it back on the ice, putting it back into play, just as an opposing player zoomed past and scooped it up. I took off after him and dug my stick in, managing to steal the puck and head back to my target. I looked up. The goalie had his net covered, while a defenseman blocked my shot. From my spot, I couldn’t get a clear shot. I glanced over my shoulder. Mac hovered to my right, out in the open. From his better position, he had a decent shot.

  I made a split-second decision. Taking a deep breath and saying a mini-prayer, I shot the puck his way.

  Mac landed the pass and brought his stick back. He fired it, making the goal. The horn went off and the game was over!

  Our teammates poured out off the bench and onto the ice, jumping on top of Mac. I skated slowly towards the pile of players.

  Josh spotted me. “Zack Attack!” He shouted in his big baritone voice.

  Someone else joined in. “Zack Attack!”

  The crowd joined the chant: “Zack Attack! Zack Attack!”

  Josh leapt in front of me and held out his arms to keep the guys from jumping on me. “Don’t forget his ribs! Don’t jump on him!” he shouted.

  Mac got off the ice and skated over. He stuck out his hand. “Good pass.”

  I looked down at his palm. “It was for the team, Mac. Not you. You’re still a giant asshole.”

  I didn’t shake his hand, but skated away towards the bench to get a drink of water.

  I watched from the boards as Mac accepted the league trophy, for a big beautiful hunk of victory. He hoisted it in the air, then did a triumphant lap around the rink. I viewed it from the side, smiling to myself.

  The game was over. We’d won. I just wanted to finish shaking hands with the other team so I could leave, get changed, and get to my play on time.

  In the locker room the guys hooted and hollered. I got into my clothes in record time, not talking to anyone. I threw my hockey bag over my shoulder, then headed for the door.

  “Great game! Good job.” Guys called out.

  I nodded as I hurried out of the locker room.

  In the hallway, my mom and aunt started squealing and jumping up and down when they saw me. I let them act silly without saying a word. My mom loved her hockey. I didn’t understand everything about her, but she deserved the win too.

  I bent down and hugged her when she ran at me.

  She spoke right in my ear. “I’m so proud of you, Zachary. Your dad would be so proud of you, too.”

  I smiled and straightened. Yeah. Well, maybe he would have. Maybe. I was a hockey player. I’d been so busy judging everyone else because of what I thought he’d done that I’d overlooked how much I loved it. Hockey. The game. It didn’t make me a certain type of person., I was me.

  Behind my mom, a man stared at the two of us. I didn’t recognize him, but he walked forward when he saw that I’d noticed him.

  “Zachary Chase?” he said as he approached. “Mrs. Chase?”

  I nodded. He stuck out his hand. “I’m Dean Johnson, a recruiter for Boston College Eagles. I’d love to talk to you about your plans for the next couple years if you’ve got a minute.”

  My mom let out a little yelp of pleasure.

  He pulled out a card and handed it to me. I looked over his shoulder. His mouth moved but I didn’t hear the words. Jane approached slowly. With her crazy dyed hair and her dark outlined eyes, she looked like the anti-Puck. I looked down to read the words on her shirt. In tiny black letters it read, “My IQ is bigger.”

  I laughed.

  Josh came up behind her, grinning. I glanced over and saw Hailey walking beside him, laughing. She caught my eye and we grinned at each other. I nodded my head towards Josh slightly and raised my eyebrows suggestively. She stuck out her tongue and I smiled again.

  Maybe it’d been a mistake, Hailey and me. I watched as she and Josh veered off towards the exit, wondering if they would become a couple. I couldn’t imagine it, but who was I to say?

  In the background, Dean talked on about scholarships and prospects, and where I wanted to go in the future. On one level my brain buzzed with excitement. Because for the first time in my life, I knew without question that I needed to play hockey. And I was completely okay with it. I’d already dealt with everything a professional hockey career meant, and would deal with it in my own way if that’s where hockey led me. But I’d deal with it my way. Not my dad’s.

  Dean noticed me staring at Jane and stopped talking as she approached.

  I glanced at him. “Excuse me, Mr. Johnson. I don’t want to be rude, but I have an obligation to be somewhere else right now.” I turned to my mom. She took a quick look at Jane, then back at Dean and me. Her face was hard to read, but the corner of her mouth turned up slightly.

  “Mom, I gotta go. I want to talk--I do, but I really have to go.” I glanced at Dean. “Can you discuss this with my mom? Maybe we can all have lunch or something tomorrow?”

  Dean’s face looked puzzled but he nodded.

  “I have to go now.”

  Neither of them answered, but I didn’t wait. I squeezed past them to reach for Jane. She’d been watching me, her eyes uncertain. Then I
heard Mac’s dad behind us, trying to interrupt my mom and Dean.

  “No thanks, sir. I’m only here to talk to Zachary Chase,” Dean said firmly, while Mac’s dad spouted off.

  “You hear that?” Jane asked me.

  Mac’s dad’s face turned red. It didn’t seem healthy for a man his age. Mac stood beside him, just as tall, but slouched as if he’d just lost his dog.

  “He scored the winning goal,” Mr. MacDonald said, loud enough for everyone in the arena to hear.

  “Off an awesome pass by Zachary.” Dean spoke in powerful voice that carried through the place. “Besides, we don’t even look at kids with bad reputations like his. Word gets around, Mr. MacDonald. He’s not the kind of kid we want.” He turned his back to Mac’s dad, and continued talking with my mom.

  I watched as Mr. MacDonald dragged Mac out of the arena.

  For a moment Mac turned. We exchanged a brief look. He turned away quickly, but for a second I thought I saw relief. It had to be tough, always having his dad harp on him like that.

  I wondered if there was something else Mac wanted to do with his life. Besides hockey, and abusing women.

  I watched him leave, wondering what my dad would have done if he’d been here tonight. I wondered if he’d like Jane, or if I’d tell him about my mixed-up feelings about Jane, Hailey, and Hockey. Nah. Probably not.

  “I almost feel sorry for him,” I said, as Mac left the arena with his head down. And then I thought of what he’d done to Jane and Mona. I turned to Jane. “I’m sorry. That sounded terrible. He doesn’t deserve pity after what he’s done.”

  In my book that kind of behavior had no excuse. Everyone has choices. I thought of Mona, and the play she wouldn’t be in. I tried to imagine the person she might have become, if only she’d stuck it out. She’d been messed with and was seriously messed up, but she’d had a lot of potential.

  I truly wished I hadn’t trashed her dignity by telling people what I’d seen. If I could only take things back, I would. I guess that’s true of mostly everybody. Probably even Mac.

  “I went to the police, you know,” Jane said softly, breaking into my thoughts. “I went before the game. I told them about what Mac did to Mona and me that time in eighth grade.”

  I grabbed her hand, searching her eyes. “You did?”

  She nodded. “I don’t know if it’ll make any difference. It happened a long time ago. But I still wanted to tell them. You know, for Mona. And I did it for me. I’m sick of feeling guilty about it. If we’d said something sooner, things could have turned out different. Maybe Mona would still be in the play.”

  “Let’s get out of here,” I whispered in Jane’s ear. “If we don’t go now, we’ll never make it in time.”

  Jane glanced at me, and then over at my mom and Dean. I followed her gaze. Their body language looked interesting; it looked as if they were flirting. Sparks were flying between them that didn’t seem to have anything to do with my future career in hockey.

  “She’ll kill you for taking off.”

  “Nah, she’ll forgive me.” I automatically glanced around looking for Hailey, forgetting for a second she’d left with Josh. She’d be at the play. We’d talk about it sometime, Hailey and me. About what happened between us that night. Or maybe not.

  Jane punched me on the arm. “Let’s go.”

  “Zachary?”

  I turned around. My aunt studied Jane and me.

  “We’ve got to go now,” I told her. “I’ve got to be at school for the curtain in an hour. I have a part in Grease.”

  Aunt Diane nodded. She smiled a conspiring smile. “Leave your equipment bag here. I’ll bring it to your mom when she’s done flirting with that scout.”

  I shot a look at my mom. She twirled a piece of hair around her finger, smiling at Dean with a smile I’d never seen before.

  “Hurry! Go! I’ll remind her about your show once she’s done mesmerizing the scout.” Aunt Diane grinned. “She’ll have you signed with the biggest team in the world by the end of your performance.”

  “You know, she always did steal the cute ones,” she said in mock anger. “First good-looking man to show up in Haletown in two solid years, and your mother already has him in her clutches.”

  We glanced over at mom, then back at each other. Aunt Diane giggled like a schoolgirl.

  “Go on, Zachary. This is good for her. It’s about time you both start living your lives.”

  I gave my aunt a quick hug.

  “We’re both so proud of you,” Aunt Diane beamed.

  “I guess hockey really is in my blood.”

  “It’s your blood, Zachary,” Aunt Diane said. “And your father would have wanted you to do what makes you happy, you know. You. It’s not about him. It’s not even about your mother. He was a good man, no matter what.”

  I nodded. ”I hope so. You know, I tried denying how much I love hockey. Because I’m afraid of turning out like him. But I guess I already am.” I spoke to Aunt Diane, but kept my eyes on Jane.

  “You’re only sixteen. I still don’t know what I want all the time, and I’m pushing thirty, or so.” My aunt laughed.

  I smiled. I had choices to make. That much was true. I studied Aunt Diane for a minute. She was the spitting image of my mom.

  “I’m nothing like him.”

  “Of course you are. But you’re not him. You’re Zachary,” Aunt Diane said proudly.

  “Yeah, I guess.” I turned to Jane. “We have to go or we’ll be late.”

  Aunt Diane nodded. “We’ll be there. Ten bucks says Mr. Scout Man will be there, too.” She smiled. “Knock ‘em dead, kids.”

  Jane and I hurried out of arena.

  “I’m nervous,” I said to Jane.

  Jane squeezed my fingers. “You’ll be fine.”

  “I know.”

  After the play, I’d think more about what I wanted in life. What I’d tell Jane. And what I wouldn’t.

  But for right now, I had a part to play. I took her hand and we left.

  THE END

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  J.E. MacLeod lives near the Rocky Mountains in Calgary, Alberta.

  J.E. can be found most days with a laptop on her lap, fighting for space with her Chihuahua.

  You can contact J.E. at write4me@shaw.ca

  Table of Contents

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  CHAPTER ONE - ZACK ATTACK

  CHAPTER TWO - SUPERSTUD

  CHAPTER THREE - SCURVY DOG

  CHAPTER FOUR - YOU REALLY ARE A HOCKEY PLAYER

  CHAPTER FIVE - THE WIN GENE

  CHAPTER SIX - WEIRD OR DIFFERENT?

  CHAPTER SEVEN - SUCK IT UP

  CHAPTER EIGHT - SCREW HOW IT LOOKS

  CHAPTER NINE - FEELING PRESSURE

  CHAPTER TEN - TYPICAL TEENAGE BOY

  CHAPTER ELEVEN - THE FULL STORY

  CHAPTER TWELVE - ZACK’S BACK

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR