Pandora Jones: Admission

by Barry Jonsberg

  The cave was small, but Nate was right. They could all fit in it and the entrance was relatively well hidden. The group huddled inside and looked around. The sand was clear and there was enough room for them all to sleep, though they would be cramped. Nonetheless, it would be much better than the uncomfortable forest floor.

  ‘There’s no driftwood in here,’ said Nate, ‘so I figure the tide won’t come up this high. It’s covered and it’s fairly safe from prying eyes. Okay. Anyone got any suggestions about what we do now?’

  ‘We need to be prepared for someone sneaking up on us,’ said Jen. ‘I propose we have someone on watch at all times, day and night. Three-hour shifts. Lying on top of the cliff would be the best position. We can see for a distance, but it would be difficult to spot us. Plus, it would be easy to raise the alarm.’

  ‘Good,’ said Nate. ‘Anything else?’

  ‘I’ll collect wood for a fire,’ said Karl. ‘I want to get dry and warm as soon as possible.’

  ‘If someone’s on watch,’ said Wei-Lin, ‘I’ll try my hand at fishing. We’ve only got that wood pigeon and it won’t be enough. While you are fetching wood, Karl, keep an eye out for anything edible. Tubers of any kind. Maybe wild onions or mushrooms. Anything to bulk out a pigeon stew.’

  Karl nodded and Nate grinned.

  ‘We sound like a team, guys,’ he said. ‘I’ll retrace our steps and smooth out the sand, hide our tracks. Karl, you do the same after you get the firewood. Sanjit, I want you to pluck and clean the bird. Do you know how to do that?’

  Sanjit shook his head. Jen stood above him, hands on hips.

  ‘Jesus, Sanjit, what’s to know?’ she asked, her voice strained. It was as if she was deliberately injecting incredulity into her tone. ‘Get rid of the feathers and the guts. It ain’t rocket science.’

  Sanjit flushed. ‘I’ve never done it, but I’ll try.’

  ‘Good,’ said Nate. He flashed Jen a look as if to tell her to back off. She stalked off to the cave’s entrance and stared out at the ocean, arms folded across her chest. ‘I’ll take first watch,’ she said without turning around. ‘I’ll whistle if I spot anything.’ And then she was gone. For a brief while the team could hear her scrambling up the cliff face, but then silence descended once more.

  ‘What’s her problem?’ said Sam.

  ‘It’s too passive for her,’ said Nate. ‘She’s not comfortable doing nothing.’ He turned to Pan. ‘Are you okay, kiddo?’ he said. ‘You’re very quiet.’

  ‘I’m fine,’ said Pan, though she wasn’t. Things were starting to come together in her mind, the jigsaw pieces slotting into position. The picture was still hazy and full of holes and many of the pieces didn’t fit seamlessly. What she needed was quiet to work things out, but she also knew the day would not bring time for contemplation. The long hours in the night were another matter. ‘What do you want me to do? I could help Wei-Lin with the fishing.’

  ‘Give Sanjit a hand,’ Nate replied. ‘I don’t want us to be out of this cave in pairs. We’ll be too easy to spot.’

  The next couple of hours were productive. Karl returned with an armful of wood and went off immediately to get another. Sanjit and Pan did their best to pluck and clean the wood pigeon. Sanjit screwed up his face at the mess of entrails, but he kept at the task. Pan took the guts out to the side of the cave and buried them in sand as deeply as she could. The carcass of the bird looked mangled, but it was the best they could do and Sanjit placed it on a ledge when they were finished. Almost immediately flies appeared, so Pan snuck out and returned with some broad leaves to wrap the bird in.

  When Wei-Lin returned she was glowing with pride. She held up her hand-line and three fish dangled, their scales catching the light and flashing fitfully.

  ‘No idea what they are,’ she said, ‘and I don’t care. Dinner is suddenly more adventurous.’

  Sanjit and Pan offered to clean the fish, but Wei-Lin waved them away. She scraped the boning knife’s blade clean with sand and then expertly gutted the fish. Pan glanced at the time and tapped Nate on the shoulder.

  ‘I’m taking second watch,’ she said and he nodded.

  Erosion had pitted the cliff face so there were plenty of hand and footholds and she climbed the few metres in a matter of seconds. Jen was lying on her stomach, her head protruding over the edge. She barely acknowledged Pan as she scrambled up and lay down beside her.

  ‘Seen anything?’ asked Pan.

  ‘Nothing,’ replied Jen. ‘All quiet. Too quiet.’

  ‘I’ll take over.’

  ‘Okay.’ But she didn’t move. The girls lay together, unspeaking for a few minutes. Then Jen turned her face. Her mouth was only centimetres from Pan’s.

  ‘I keep thinking about that fight,’ she said. ‘You know? Where you kicked my arse. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were better trained than me. That you were some kind of martial arts expert. You now, from before. Those moves were like nothing I’ve ever seen. How did you do it?’

  Pan turned her head to the beach. She scanned the shoreline and kept the forest in the periphery of her vision. Nothing moved.

  ‘The truth?’ she said.

  Jen snorted. ‘No, lie to me. Of course the truth.’

  ‘I don’t know. It’s difficult to explain. I cleared my mind, I looked into your eyes. I sort of . . . I let my body react, as though it was operating independently of me. And I instinctively knew what you were going to do and how to counter it. I know it sounds dumb. But I don’t know any other way of explaining it.’

  ‘You’re right. It sounds dumb.’

  ‘Thanks.’

  ‘How did you know Cara was up that mountain if you had nothing to do with her disappearance?’

  Pan stiffened and fought a surge of anger. She forced her muscles to relax. This was a subject that everyone avoided. Only Jen had the courage to ask straight out.

  ‘I didn’t kill her,’ she said quietly. ‘If that’s what you think.’

  ‘But you knew where her body was.’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Your intuition again, right?’

  ‘Yes. Look, Jen. I know you don’t believe me, but to be honest, I don’t care anymore whether you do or you don’t.’

  ‘All right. Let’s assume for a moment that you do have this sixth sense. What does it tell you about this place? I mean, you went off into one of your trances back in the forest. Did you sense anything?’

  ‘One of us will remain here.’ She regretted it as soon as the words came out.

  When Jen spoke, there was nothing in her voice that indicated shock or surprise. ‘Do you know who?’

  ‘No. I’m guessing it’s not me, but that’s all there is. A feeling. A sense that only six of us will leave this island.’

  And suddenly, it came to her. Why the feeling had appeared so strange when she’d first experienced it. This was new territory. In the past, her intuitions had been based on events that had already occurred – the finding of Wei-Lin’s watch, her location of Cara’s body. Never before had she seen into the future. Yet her knowledge of the men on the island, the sense they meant them harm and, above all, the premonition that one of the party would remain behind . . . Pan shivered. What is happening to me? she thought. I am changing. The thought was at once terrifying and strangely empowering. Pan shook her head. This was something she’d have to examine later. Jen had said something, but she’d missed it.

  ‘Sorry?’ she said.

  ‘I said what makes you think this is an island?’

  ‘I don’t know.’ Until Pan had said the word she had no idea she’d even been thinking it. More food for thought. But it felt right. This was an island.

  ‘You don’t know much, do you? Maybe you assume it’s an island simply because we came by boat?’

  Pan scrambled to her feet. Her head was too full of possibilities to focus properly on Jen’s scorn.

  ‘Look, you asked. I answered. This is my watch, so why don’t you just leave?’

&n
bsp; But Jen didn’t leave. Not immediately. She plucked a thin piece of grass from the cliff top and stuck it in her mouth, chewed slowly.

  Pan suddenly felt very exposed, confused and not a little foolish. She lay down again.

  ‘The smart money would be on Sanjit,’ said Jen.

  ‘I guess.’

  Jen spat the grass from her mouth and got to her feet.

  ‘Keep your eyes out,’ she said. ‘And, Pandora? I hope you’re wrong, but if it comes true . . . well, I might have to rethink my opinion of you.’ She shifted her body and dropped over the cliff face. A moment later her face reappeared. ‘Unless you kill that person, of course. There’s always that to think about.’

  Pan settled down on the cliff top and glanced at her watch. Two hours and forty-five minutes. Plenty of thinking time, with no distractions. She felt on the verge of a breakthrough. It was a strong feeling and she was beginning to believe that strong feelings were her greatest asset.

  ~~~

  Night fell quickly and Nate gave the order to light the fire. Jen took a small flint from her pocket and used the knife to strike sparks onto a nest of wood shavings. As soon as a spark caught, she brought her face to the wood and blew gently. The nest glowed and tiny licks of flame spread. Jen put more shavings on top and a thin trickle of smoke emerged. Within ten minutes a fire blazed at the side of the cave. The smoke was a problem. It gathered in the roof and spread downwards so that everyone’s eyes stung and watered. It was slightly better towards the back of the cave, but still unpleasant. Sam took the broad leaf that Nate had used to sweep away their tracks on the beach and used it as a makeshift fan. It helped a little. The smoke drifted out of the cave’s entrance. If it had been light, it would have betrayed their position immediately. But darkness was on their side and the fire, they hoped, was far enough back in the cave that no glow would be apparent to anyone from a distance.

  Wei-Lin took on the role of cook. Karl had found some roots that might be edible, but her plan of making a wood pigeon stew had to be abandoned because they had nothing to cook it in. So she stuffed the potato-like vegetables into the bird’s cavity and skewered the carcass shut with a thin branch. Nate had fashioned a couple of wooden forks over the fire and Wei-Lin placed the skewer onto the forks. Within moments, fat dripped from the bird and made sizzling noises in the fire. Sanjit volunteered to rotate the bird on its spit while Wei-Lin prepared the fish. The group, with the exception of Sam who was on watch, huddled around the fire. Gradually, Pan was starting to feel warm and dry.

  It wasn’t the greatest meal Pan had ever eaten but it was a feast under the circumstances. Parts of the bird were slightly overcooked, but by the time they’d finished there was nothing left except bones. Jen even broke the carcass apart to suck out what juice remained. Pan had taken Sam’s share up to the cliff top. The fire died down and the smoke problem eased. The cave still wasn’t exactly warm, but it was a vast improvement on spending the night out of doors. Pan felt even better when a steady rain fell, though she experienced a twinge of sympathy for Sam. They spread themselves out as best they could and settled in to sleep. Nate slept close to Pan. She could hear the faint murmur of his breath. Once or twice, she felt his breath on her cheek.

  ~~~

  Pan woke at five o’clock. She carefully rose and stepped over the sleeping forms around her. There was barely room to place her feet. The entrance to the cave was nearly as dark as the interior. She climbed the few metres to the top of the cliff and found Karl slumped on the ground. For a moment her heart raced until she saw his chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. Falling asleep on duty, she thought. He put us all at risk.

  It took a moment to control her anger. Cut him some slack, she thought. They had all had an exhausting day and Karl must have risen at three in the morning. There were mitigating factors. She considered shaking him awake, but thought better of it. Let him sleep. She was up now and they didn’t need two on watch. She’d wake him when the others stirred and his dereliction of duty could remain their secret.

  Pan climbed down to the beach and watched the sky. No one would see her if she stayed close to the cliff. A few stars shone hard and bright through the gaps of cloud cover. It was peaceful. The gentle whisper of the ocean. The clean and fresh air. At The School there was always an underlying smell of something unpleasant – sweat, mainly. She walked towards the sea. Darkness was still a good cover, though she could see the first streaks of dawn against the horizon. In half an hour the sun would rise. She sat on the sand at the water’s edge, waves lapping against her toes. She thought things through again, all the ideas that had come to her on her watch and in those times when she had woken in the night and couldn’t get back to sleep. Most of her conclusions lacked any corroborating evidence. Huge questions remained unanswered. But she felt certain her line of thought was, in the main, correct. But she also knew she couldn’t say anything to the others. Not yet. The main problem was who to trust. If she was right about The School, it was difficult to trust anyone. Even yourself. Perhaps especially yourself.

  Dawn gave the air a grainy luminescence. As soon as the entrance to the cave became visible, Pan climbed back up the cliff and woke Karl. He jerked upright as soon as her hand touched his arm. Realising what he’d done, he blushed.

  ‘I was just resting my eyes,’ he whispered.

  ‘I know,’ Pan replied. ‘I’ve been on watch.’

  Karl rubbed at his eyes. ‘Sorry.’

  ‘You’re lucky. It’s all quiet. Why don’t you go down to the cave? And if anyone’s up yet, tell them I’m in the market for a full English breakfast.’

  Karl smiled. ‘I’ll pass it on,’ he said.

  Pan watched the ocean. There was something relaxing about the way the waves rolled in and retreated, like the sea itself was breathing. She found it almost hypnotic. Pan tried to keep her mind alert to any movement in her peripheral vision, but her gaze kept returning to the ocean. She was certain that if anything moved along the beach she would spot it. Of course, if anything approached from behind, from out of the forest, they were all in trouble. When the sun was up, Wei-Lin came out of the cave with her hand line and made her way to the water line. She waved up at Pan and Pan waved back. Wei-Lin waded into the ocean up to her waist and threw out her line. Pan wondered what she was using for bait. Maybe she’d kept some of the fish guts from the previous meal. Pan forced herself not to watch, afraid she’d jinx Wei-Lin’s luck. Anyway, she needed to keep a lookout. And watch the ocean and let the thoughts weave through her head.

  The rest of her watch passed quickly. Wei-Lin returned with two small fish on her line. She shrugged apologetically as she approached the cave entrance. Pan gave her a thumbs-up. Within another half hour the smell of cooking fish drifted to her nostrils. They must have used the ashes of the fire to roast them, she thought. Sam brought her share up to her. It was pitifully small, but Pan’s stomach rumbled in anticipation.

  ‘I was told to tell you the full English is off the menu,’ Sam said.

  ‘Poached eggs with bacon?’

  ‘Off.’

  ‘Corn fritters?’

  ‘Off.’

  ‘How about a tiny sliver of almost cooked and wholly unidentifiable fish?’

  ‘A wise choice, madam.’

  When she’d finished breakfast, Pan felt hungrier than before. They needed meat. Maybe Wei-Lin could give the forest another chance. There had to be something in there. A pig, maybe. She wished she hadn’t mentioned bacon to Sam. The thought was torture.

  It was Wei-Lin who eventually scrambled up the cliff to relieve her. ‘They’ve been discussing a plan for today,’ she told Pan. ‘See what you think.’

  When Pan climbed down, Jen was sharpening the knife against the cliff face. She was doing so with fierce concentration, rubbing first one edge and then the other. Her face was set and Pan thought she detected anger in her every movement. The rest of the team looked tired and dispirited.

  ‘We’ve decided that we need
to top up the water supply and see if we can find something to eat out there,’ Nate said to Pan. He jerked his head in the general direction of the forest.

  ‘Sounds sensible,’ Pan replied. ‘I was just thinking we could do with something other than fish on the menu. Who’s going?’

  ‘Wei-Lin and Jen,’ said Nate. ‘The rest of us are staying put.’

  Pan raised her eyebrows. Jen stopped honing the blade and slipped the knife into her waistband.

  ‘If I don’t do something,’ she said, ‘I am going to go completely crazy. Sitting around is doing my head in. Jesus, at least at The School I could do something. Run or practise weapons-training. Even the philosophy classes were better than being stuck here, following the second hand on my watch.’

  ‘She wants action,’ said Karl.

  ‘No, really?’ said Pan.

  ‘As long as you don’t go looking for it, Jen, okay?’ said Nate. ‘You hear me? You go to the river, you mark your way by making cuts in the trees as we agreed. If you find food, great. Go for it. But you do not take risks, is that understood? This is about getting there and getting back without detection.’

  ‘What? You think I’ll go looking for those guys?’ said Jen.

  ‘It’s crossed my mind. Yes. But you have a responsibility to all of us, okay? Stealth and speed, Jen. Stealth and speed. Avoid conflict.’

  ‘Yeah, yeah,’ said Jen. ‘I hear you.’ She walked to the back of the cave and picked up Wei-Lin’s bow and quiver. ‘Is someone going to take over her watch?’ she said, ‘because I want to get going as soon as possible.’

  ‘I’ll do it,’ said Nate. He sighed. ‘Take care of each other. And for Chrissake, find us something to eat. Hell, insects will do.’

  Jen smiled. ‘I’ll get us something better than insects,’ she said.

  ‘Do you want the compass?’ asked Sanjit. He reached into his pocket and pulled it out. ‘We don’t need it.’

  Jen glanced down at him. ‘Nah,’ she said. ‘Keep it. You might need it to find your way out of the cave.’

  ‘Jen . . .’ said Nate.