by Mandi Beck
Here we go.
“There’s my favorite hockey player,” she says excitedly, pulling him into a tight hug. “How are you, baby? Still sore from the game?”
“Nah, I’m okay, Ma.”
“Good. Bastard,” she says ferociously, just like a mama bear, and I chuckle to myself. I saw the game, I may have called the guy who hit him a bastard myself.
“Ma, this is Stella Cruz. Stella, Carly Dagger.” When she turns to me, her eyes widen, almost to the point I think they might fall right out of her damn head before she catches herself.
Holding out my hand , I force my lips to stretch into a wobbly smile. “Mrs. Dagger.”
She takes my hand, eyes on my belly, then to Jason, and back to me. “Please, call me Carly. My mother-in-law was Mrs. Dagger, and she was not a nice woman.”
I laugh nervously and Jason interrupts the awkward moment. “Who’s all here?”
“Just you guys and your dad. Your sisters won’t be here until tomorrow night.”
“Perfect, I don’t want to overwhelm Stella.” He places a reassuring hand on the small of my back, and I’ve never been so grateful for such a simple touch. I feel on the verge of a panic attack. I’ve never been a part of a large family, and for the last little while, it’s just been me, since Carlo has been deployed and Abuelita passed away. I was ready to jump out of my skin until I felt his warm palm through my thin sweater, anchoring me, calming me. What in the world is happening here?
“Let’s go into the family room. I think your dad is watching a game. We can probably tear him away from it.” She laughs.
“Stella, can I get you anything to drink?”
“No, I’m fine, thank you.” If I even attempt to drink anything right now, I’ll choke.
With Jason’s hand guiding me, I follow his mother into the room. A man—his father, I presume—looks up from the TV. His eyes land on his son and then on me before he says, “Well, that took a lot longer than I expected. I assumed I’d be a grandpa before you graduated high school the way you carried on.”
The room erupts into laughter, and even I find myself giggling.
“Whatever, old man.” The men embrace and then Mr. Dagger turns to me.
“And who is this pretty girl?” His eyes are the same color blue as Jason’s, and smiling, right along with the rest of him. He’s like a young Santa Claus, if that makes any sense. He just looks…jolly.
“Dad, this is Stella Cruz. Stella, my dad, Johnathan.”
I hold out my hand to him and he waves it away. “Bring it in for the real thing, sweet pea. If you’re gonna make me a grandpa, we can’t be strangers.” His dad scoops me into a gentle, yet warm, hug. “Welcome to the family, Stella. We’ve been waiting for you,” he says quietly, so only I can hear. That simple statement has tears pricking at my eyes. Family. I forgot how much I’ve missed being part of one.
“Johnathan, let the poor girl go, so I can get a look at her,” Carly says, swatting at his arm. He releases me and steps back, gathering Jason into a back-thumping hug, murmuring words into his ear.
There are tears in her eyes now as well—no judgment or distrust, and just like that, all the tension leaves my body. These people are inherently good and kind, just like their son, and my child will be a part of this. Of them. The peace I feel at that is overwhelming. I was determined to do this on my own, to be the only family this baby would ever need. Now, the fact that I don’t have to be, that he or she will have the Daggers, with their big hearts and open arms, is more than I could have ever hoped or imagined. I look over at Jason, who is smiling at something his dad is saying to him, and realize that even though we may not know each other well, nor are we even in a real relationship, I wouldn’t choose anyone else to be this baby’s father.
Nine
Jason
Christmas Eve is a big deal in my family. My parents are over the moon about having us all together for the holiday this year, and even more excited they convinced Stella to come. The thought of her spending it alone in her dorm while her roommates were with their families was a little more than any of us could deal with. Even my sister Joey insisted she come.
Introducing her to my parents and sisters, and telling them she was having the first Dagger grandbaby was easier and more emotional than I ever imagined. I know my parents have some questions, but they were so damn excited we decided all of that could wait. My ma gave Stella the third degree about her doctor’s appointments, morning sickness, stretch marks, and all kinds of shit I never even thought to ask.
I have about a couple hours before I have to go pick her up, so I’m meeting Levi on the ice, since I’m supposed to be spending time with him while I’m here too. Pulling open the doors on the arena, I’m immediately brought back to that night here with Stella. It was probably the hottest sex of my life. Maybe because it was her, or because it was in here. Regardless, it’s something I’ll never forget.
“What’s up, bro! I was about to give up on you.”
“Sorry, man. This trip has been nuts. Between the holidays and family…” I toss my bag down and pull out my skates.
“Heard you showed up at Cruz’s job looking for her.” He leans on his stick, watching me lace up.
“Oh yeah? Who said that?” I’m betting it was that Eric kid who had me signing shit.
“Eric Andes. Said you were waiting in the parking lot for her when she came out of work.”
Called it.
“And?” Levi is a good guy, but I’m not about to just tell him all my business.
“And is the baby yours?” His gaze on me is steady as he stands on the ice, waiting for my answer.
“If it is?”
“If it is, what do you plan to do about it? Cruz is good people. She’s a hard worker, and has had a shit time the last couple of years. You fuck her over, and maybe I have to tell them I need a different mentor. One who doesn’t go around, knocking up college chicks and then leaving them high and dry,” the little shit says, in a tone that tells me he means every word.
Good. I’m glad Stella has people protecting her. She doesn’t need protection though, especially from me.
Standing, I step onto the ice and bump his shoulder. “You can take it easy, tiger, I’m not going anywhere. Stella doesn’t need you to protect her from me.”
“I’m glad to hear it. I like you, but I’d still drop your ass if you weren’t doing right by her.”
“Is that right? You wanna go, Rookie?” I ask playfully, putting my fists up and skating around him in a circle.
“Don’t make me hurt you, old man.” He laughs, skating off in the opposite direction. “Try to keep up, I’ve learned a few things since the last time you were here,” Levi calls out, his voice echoing in the empty arena.
Grabbing my stick, I follow after him. Cocky prick, reminds me of myself when I was his age. It’s probably why I like him so much, and didn’t beat his ass for questioning me about Stella.
“Hey, Stell, I’m out front. What’s your dorm number?” I ask, juggling my phone as I climb out of the truck. The cold air cuts through me as the wind whips around, blowing snow in every direction. Fucking frigid ass state.
“Just stay there, I’ll come down.”
“It’s slippery out, we got a fuck ton of snow. Let me come get you.”
“I’ll be fine,” she huffs.
I know it won’t do any good to argue with her, so I go to the door of the building and wait for her to come out. Stubborn ass woman. She bursts through the door about a minute later, and all I can do is stare. She’s stunning. Literally. Her hair is down and wicked wavy, which I’ve decided is my favorite. Her lips are painted a sexy Christmasy red, the snow already gathering on her lashes and cheeks, adding to her festive look.
From the moment I laid eyes on her, I thought Stella was hot as hell, but she’s more than that. Even in Christmas pajamas that look a lot like a onesie. I wonder if there’s a butt flap on them? The thought makes me smile, and a laugh slips out when I think
back to telling her. I’ve never seen someone get so excited about being able to wear pajamas.
“Do I have to dress up because I don’t fit in a single thing other than sweats right now.”
“Nope. Family tradition, my ma insists we all wear Christmas pajamas.”
“Oh my god, really? That’s so amazing. I just fell in love with your mother.”
“Where’s your coat, Stella?”
“Let’s not talk about my coat and how it doesn’t fit over my belly,” she all but growls.
“You’re gonna get sick.”
“No, I’m not. That’s not how you get sick. You get sick from germs.”
“Smartass.” I slip my coat from my shoulders and put it on her. Even six months pregnant, she swims in it.
Two steps from the door and she slips on a patch of ice. Catching her easily, I narrow my eyes at her. “You’re lucky I’m more stubborn than you are. Had I not come to the door, you would have busted your ass and hurt yourself.”
“But I didn’t,” she says, smiling sweetly as she hooks her arm through mine.
I help her into the truck and crank the heat. “You ready?”
“As I’ll ever be.” She looks nervous.
“What’s wrong?” I reverse and maneuver through the snowy parking lot, then glance over to see her gnawing on her bottom lip.
“What if they don’t like me? I mean, your parents and Joey were wicked sweet, but your other sisters…”
“I’ll kick their asses,” I say simply, with a shrug of my shoulders. That gets a laugh out of her.
“Really, Jase. I mean there’s a lot of them. The odds are not in my favor.”
I’m not sure if she noticed the little nickname, but I did. Maybe I’m winning the battle after all. She seems more comfortable with me and the thought of having me around.
“Stella, it’ll be fine.” Truthfully, it should be. The only one who will not just accept Stella and the baby without some kind of proof is my oldest sister, Johnanne. She’s a ballbuster, and that’s actually putting it nicely. She’s a bitch. But she’s our bitch and we love her. I don’t tell Stella that, though, she’s nervous enough. I already had a talk with my ma about my oldest sister.
“Okay, tell me their names again.”
“There’s Johnanne, she’s the oldest and a lawyer recently married. Then Jordan, Joey, and Jessie. Jordan is a teacher and also married, Joey is still in school for nursing, and Jessie owns a bakery.” I give her the CliffsNotes version.
“I love how you guys are all J’s. Should we name the baby with a J name?” The question is asked so nonchalantly, yet it means so much to me that she’s willing to carry on our tradition, and that she’s asking my opinion.
“My ma would love that. We don’t have to though.”
“Your sisters names, are those nicknames or…?”
“Nope. My dad was sure he would have all boys and would only come up with boys’ names, so my ma went with it. Johnanne was supposed to be a junior. When she was born and obviously not a junior, the old man convinced my ma to still use his name. She compromised by adding the Anne,” I tell her.
“That’s so cute though. Poor guy gets one son and he’s stuck with you,” Stella teases, biting her lip to hold back her laugh.
“Hey now. They broke the mold with me, baby.”
“They broke something.” She snorts out a laugh.
I’m glad that she’s loosening up and smiling freely now. I don’t want her to worry because honestly, I won’t stand for anyone giving her shit, not even my sisters.
We pull into the driveway behind my sister’s Tahoe. Everyone is here. I look over at Stella and she’s looking nervous again, eyeing the full drive. I slide my hand underneath her hair, cupping the back of her neck and tugging lightly until she looks my way. My eyes fall to her full lips, then up to her eyes, nearly black in the dark interior of the truck. Without saying a word, I tug again, until we’re meeting over the center console, our mouths a hair’s breadth away, our eyes touching over every inch of the other’s face before locking.
“I’m going to kiss you right now, Stella. Here, when it’s just you and I because I want to. Not because you’re pregnant with my kid, but because you’re fucking beautiful and I want you more than I’ve ever wanted another woman, and I gotta tell you, that scares me. The way you fit so well in my life, with my family, scares me. But it also feeds this need for you,” I admit.
“It scares me too,” she whispers, before her eyes flutter closed in invitation.
Not wanting to waste time talking anymore, I tilt her chin and slant my lips over hers, biting at the plump bottom lip until she opens to me, allowing me to slide my tongue along the seam of her full mouth. Her hand snakes into my hair, holding me to her, begging me without using words to keep kissing her. I pull away to rain kisses along her jaw and down her neck, causing her to purr like a contented cat.
I only meant to kiss her to ease her nerves. Once she looked my way though, something shifted. This all just feels so damn right. She feels right. I’ve never even had a serious relationship and yet, I’m ready to start a family with this woman ten years younger than me. A woman, some might say I barely know, but I do. I know her character and to me, that’s everything. Without caring that those same people are going to talk. With total and complete trust, I know I’m doing this thing with Stella Cruz. All I have to do is convince her, right after I kiss the ever-loving shit out of her.
We finally break apart, both a little dazed. “You ready?”
“I am now,” Stella says, a sexy smile slipping over her face.
Ten
Jason
“Where my Ho’s at?” I call out as I usher Stella into the house.
My ma comes from the family room, a smile brighter than her Christmas tree lighting up her face. “There you two are. I was worried you wouldn’t make it.”
She takes the bags from us so I can help Stella take off my jacket. “Oh my word, how cute are you in those jammies?” Ma says, laughing. “May I?” she asks Stella, hand stretched toward her belly.
“Oh yes! Thank you for asking though. People are crazy.” Stella shakes her head in disgust. “Perfect strangers will walk up to me and rub my belly. It’s especially bad at the restaurant I work at. I think, maybe because they’re eye level with it when I’m standing next to the table.”
“People are nuts. When I was pregnant with one of the girls, Jonathan had a shirt made for me that said, ‘You touch my belly, I’ll touch yours.’ It slowed some folks down.”
The whole time my ma is talking, my eyes are glued to Stella’s ass and the flap on her pajamas that I was wondering about earlier. That flap shouldn’t be sexy, it shouldn’t have me thinking all the filthy ways I can get at her just by unfastening those two little buttons. Damn it, this is going to be the longest night of my life. Okay, maybe not my life, but it’s gonna be fucking long.
“Everyone here?” I ask, planting a kiss on my mother’s head, although she’s preoccupied with Stella’s baby bump.
“Yes, they’re all here.” Her head shoots up. “Oh! I felt a kick.”
“All day, he’s been extra feisty.” Stella laughs. Not wanting to miss this, I place a hand on the other side of her belly and wait, but get nothing.
“What is everyone doing in here?” my oldest sister demands.
“Hey there, big sis,” I greet, scooping her up in a bear hug.
“Put me down, you goon.” Johnanne laughs as I place her on her feet. I’m just about to introduce her to Stella when she blurts out, “Oh my god, nobody told me she was a minor! A little heads up would have been nice.” She turns to me. “You do have a lawyer, right?”
And this is what I was afraid of. There was no way in hell Johnanne was gonna let this be easy. She’s an attorney, and this whole thing screams red flag to her.
“Johnanne,” my ma warns.
“What, Ma? He’s not just anybody. He has got to protect himself. Jason doesn’t have the luxury
to just go with the flow. He’s worth a lot of money and a perfect target. No offense, I’m sure you’re a nice girl,” my sister says to Stella, her tone flippant.
Thirty seconds, and I’ve had enough. “That’s enough, Johnanne,” I bite out before she says another word. Next to me, Stella has tensed, my mother’s hands falling from her stomach.
“Jaso—”
“No,” I interrupt, my tone leaving no room for argument. “I—”
“Jase,” Stella says, a hand on my arm. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay, Stella.” My frustration is rising. I knew Johnanne was going to have something to say, but I expected her to wait to speak to me in private.
“It is. Your sister’s concerned, and she should be.” Stella turns to my sister. “I’m glad that you have some sense because he doesn’t.” She smiles over at me and winks. “Just so you know, I’m not a minor. I’m twenty, so no lawsuit for Jason there. And I don’t want your brother’s money. In fact, before I take a dime from him for anything, I will be insisting on a paternity test. Not for me because I know the truth, but for his protection. There are too many crazies out there who would jump at the opportunity to pin a baby on a pro athlete.”
“But not you?” Johnanne asks curiously.
“I’m not trying to pin anything on anyone. As of a couple days ago, I was content to raise this baby on my own, even if I had to work four jobs to do it. Hell, I’m still prepared to do just that. After meeting your parents and sister though, I would love for them to be a part of this little one’s life, even if your brother isn’t. I don’t have much family left. Only my brother, actually, who is deployed more often than not, and family is as important to me as it is to all of you.” Stella’s voice wavers with emotion.