The Next Contestant

by Dani Evans

  My phone dings and I’m hoping it’s Jax, though I doubt it. Not with their busy game schedule. I retrieve my phone and swipe the screen.

  My heart leaps when I see his name and I instantly open the text he sent.

  J: Hey sexy. We have four games today, dinner afterward with the team and parents, so I’ll be busy, but I want you to come to the cabin tonight. We should be back around seven. Be here around eight. Sandy will be here so just tell Kolby she invited you. She mentioned it earlier so if she hasn’t texted you already, she will. Don’t text back bcuz I won’t be able to respond. We are headed to the fields now. Just show up!

  I glance at the time. It’s seven-thirty.

  Another text comes through. It’s Jax again. I open it and it’s just a text with the location and cabin number.

  There is no way I can refrain from sending one tiny text. I type out:

  Good luck today! Can’t wait to see you again. xx/oo

  He responds.

  J: Thank you! Miss you. I have plans for us in the upcoming weeks. When the games are over. Gotta go. You know Kolby!

  I’m so giddy by his invite and decide I’ll definitely get my nails and hair done. I can wait on shopping. I have plenty of outfits he hasn’t seen me in yet.

  I wear my hair in long curls and pin the sides at the back with a small clip. I pull out a few strands on each side and add a little hair spray but not too much.

  My skin is tan and it really shows with the white halter top and matching skirt that is… well, rather short but it shows off my equally tan legs. Thanks to the day at the beach with Jax.

  I grab my purse and the small bag I packed and head out.

  The two-hour drive feels like an eternity, mostly because I’m anxious to see him.

  There are cars everywhere along the road, but I find an open spot in the driveway and pull in. I can hear the music thumping loudly and know the boys are partying. They’ve obviously won their games, which I already knew because Sandy texted me. She also invited me, more like told me to get my ass down here. God, I love that girl!

  I slide out of my car and decide to leave my overnight bag in the back seat, not wanting to assume I’m staying the night.

  Leisurely walking to the front door, I pause to reel in my excitement, my giddiness, not wanting to alert my brother in any way that I’m here solely for Jax. I step in and focus on finding Sandy, scouring the crowd of people in the living room, searching for him mostly while also looking for Sandy.

  It’s hot in here, or maybe it’s my nerves, my over anxiousness to see him. I wipe the trickle of sweat beading over my eyebrows and catch Jaden as he glances up at me.

  “Sunshine,” he shouts. “How’s our little firecracker… ready to party?”

  My cheeks heat as faces I know, and many unfamiliar ones, all glance my way.

  “Hell yes she is,” some fairly good-looking, blue eyed, dark haired guy says. “My lap is free, sweetheart.” He pats his lap. The other males around him also pat their laps and before I can move on, they’re all punching each other, fighting over whose lap I’ll sit in. Obviously unaware of whom I’m really here for.

  “Where’s Sandy?” I shout over the noise.

  “In the kitchen sucking face with your brother,” Jaden shouts equally as loud.

  I push through the crowd to get to the kitchen. I’ll have to pull Sandy aside to ask where Jax is without my brother catching wind of it.

  The kitchen, though large, is crowded but my eyes only see one thing. My heart seizes and I stagger back. Jax is sitting with his back toward me and he’s not alone. I see Timber’s blonde hair, her skinny legs straddling him on the chair. Her fingers are wrapped in his hair and his are gripping her hips. Her white skirt is pushed up her thighs, threads of her underwear clearly visible. Did he push it up? Touch her there… in front of all these people? Bile rises in my throat at the thought, at the sight of them so intimately close, and when her lips greet his neck, I gasp in horror. Her eyes flick up at me and Jax abruptly pushes her off him, springing to his feet.

  Jax’s gaze lands on me. A shard of pain rips through me, stealing my breath. Time stills in the silent room. Or maybe I can’t hear the noise around the buzz in my head.

  Jax just stands there, not attempting to move, in shock at being caught, I think. His expression, a mix of confusion and guilt, is not lost on me. I snap my gaping mouth closed and internally try talking my frozen body to turn and get the hell out of here. I see Timber mugging me with a devious smile full of satisfaction.

  “What are you doing here?” she sneers while wrapping her arm around Jax’s waist.

  Jax shoves her aside, but it’s too late. Damage is done. My eyes sting but there is no way I’m going to cry, not here, not in front of him or her. I flip around and push through the crowd, but someone grabs my shoulder from behind. I turn to find Kolby.

  “Hey, Sis. What’s wrong?” His smirk doesn’t go unnoticed. He knew… wanted me to see what Jax was up to. And it’s such a cruel thing to do!

  “Fuck you, Kolby. I hate you, I disown you!” I manage to get past him, past the spectators and rush out the front door. I’m in my car, putting it into reverse when Jax comes flying out the door and toward me.

  “Kimber, wait!” He’s at my window trying to get me to stop.

  “Don’t ever call me again. I hate you, Jax!” I flip him off and press down harder on the gas. Jax steps back before I run his feet over. He’s frowning, hard, and he keeps raking his fingers through his hair. I finally get out of the driveway and he throws his hands in the air as if he’s lost this battle. Well, he has!

  It should have been pretty damned obvious he only wanted one thing from me. He doesn’t really want me. Not long term. He just wanted to fuck me. I’ve royally screwed myself over, my stupid heart, my head, telling me to be cautious, but I ignored it and fell for him.

  How could I have misread the situation between us so unreservedly, throwing all caution completely down the drain? I never should have let him take me to his home. His bullshit lines…“I don’t share my home with anyone, Kimber. You’re the first.” God! “I want more from you.” Well of course he did. Now that he’s had more of me, all of me, he’s done with… me.

  I evaded the warnings, all the signs were there. The gossip, the girls complaining at the party previously, but I was too besotted and oblivious to notice, my only goal was to make him mine.

  My phone won’t stop vibrating, and ringing. I refuse to answer it or look at the texts. Refuse to see what excuse he’ll toss at me.

  Tears flow and fail to cease all the way home. I’m not sure how I made it and how the drive back seemed so much faster than the drive to the cabin, but hell, my head is so clouded that a nuclear war could have broken out and I wouldn’t have noticed.

  I park half ass in my designated parking spot, and partially in the one next to it. Oh fucking well. Walking glumly to my dorm room, I enter and lock myself in.

  After I’m settled, I lie in bed and sob. My phone buzzes again and I briefly glance at the screen. It’s a message from Sandy so I open it.

  Girl! Are you okay? Shit. Kolby is on his way to your place, worried you got in an accident or something because you won’t answer or respond to his texts. Please tell me you’re—

  I scramble out of bed, drop my phone in my purse, unable to read the rest of her text. I am not facing my brother! I hate him right now. Rushing around my room, I grab my duffle bag already stuffed with clothes and then I grab my purse, keys and shoes and rush out of the dorms. I nervously glance down the parking lot, praying Kolby doesn’t come flying up it, trapping me in.

  Once I’m safely pulling on to the freeway, I drive a few miles and then pull over. I’ve got to find somewhere else to stay, somewhere my brother won’t think to search for me.

  Diana, Angela, Janice, Karina, and as of one month ago, Trena, all share a rental house not far from campus. I drive there and pray someone is home.

  Several cars are in the drivewa
y and I recognize Diana’s car as well as her man, Dean’s, parked next to hers, so I know she’s home.

  I knock on the door a few times before Diana answers it. One look at my tear stained face and she’s instantly pulling me inside and wrapping me in a hug.

  “What did that motherfucker do to you? I swear I’ll kill him!” she hisses, her anger palpable through her tightening grip around my upper body.

  I laugh. “If you squeeze me any tighter, I won’t be alive to see it.”

  My dearest friends all pile into the living room to see what all the commotion is about. We sit on the long circular sectional and Dean, the secretly handsome and sweet man—though he’d never admit it—breaks out the shot glasses and tequila.

  I rehash my horrible evening, and as I tell it, we break for shots and then I continue.

  “That fucking whore,” Diana spits. “A toast to make her life a living hell,” she shouts and we all clank our shot glasses and down the amber liquid.

  “To finding hot, sexy ass men to flirt and parade around the douchebag!” Angela screams in delight and we all drink to that.

  “To fuck a bitch up,” Karina jeers, punching her fist into her open palm, and we all toast to this.

  “Hell no!” Trena slams her cup down and replenishes our shot glasses. “To putting a whore down and a motherfucker in the ground.” We all drink and my head is swimming with a good buzz, but it isn’t enough to drown my aching heart.

  And then I think of my brother, his knowing smirk. “To kill a brother off,” I say feebly. The room falls silent. I glance at all the faces staring at me. “Okay, I don’t mean that literally, but I hate my brother enough at the moment to disown him. He knew the bitch was there with Jax,” I plead with them.

  “To disown a jackass brother,” Diana says in my defense.

  “To disown a jackass brother,” the girls shout in unison and… yes, we all toast to this.

  And then my phone buzzes again, this time I glance at it. I don’t bother reading Kolby’s text. I just respond so he’ll know I’m alive and leave me the fuck alone.

  My welfare is none of your concern. I no longer have a brother. You’re dead to me. Go fuck yourself. Fuck her, fuck him, fuck all of you!

  I hit send and then shut my phone off.

  Sunday morning, I wake with a killer headache. I’m confused by my surroundings until the entire night comes crashing back, unwelcome. Retrieving my phone, I turn it on. It immediately buzzes, alerting me there are new text messages. I open the text from unknown and instantly regret it. It’s a picture of her hand down Jax’s pants. Below, it reads:

  Bitch. He’s mine. Stay the fuck away from him.

  The alert telling me my battery is low startles me. I shut it off and toss it in my purse on the side of the bed.

  SOMETIME LATER SUNDAY morning, I decide I want to go home, needing to be alone. Everyone is still sleeping. I scribble a small note, thanking them for listening to me babble last night and that I’d be fine.

  The sun is bright but my soul is dark and filled with pain. I make my way to the fourth floor, to my dorm and drop my belongings in the living room. I should really clean or work out, but I have no energy, no desire to do anything so I climb into bed, wanting nothing more than to heal my shattered heart. I grab a pillow, curl into it, and let the tears flow, which turn into ugly, heaving sobs.

  How naïve am I? What an epic blow to my ignorant self. I’ve lost something I never really had. The truth hurts. Jax has never been mine, not the way I wanted him to be. He’s whatever you want him to be in the moment but all is lost once he’s had his way with you.

  The week drags on and I find it hard to concentrate in school, in dance, in life itself. I wish I could skip to the future, to a time I could look back at this and laugh, and no longer feel the pain.

  Everyone, everything is annoying. Friday, at practice, Sandy keeps nagging me, telling me she needs to talk to me, but I’ve been brushing her off. Fortunately, my entire body and soul seem to obey when we practice for the upcoming dance competition. My anger seems to spur me, and I’m perfectly in tune with every move, every step of the routine. Coach is exuberant, elated and over the top with praise. I guess it’s the only good thing that’s come out of this gut-wrenching heartache.

  My only comfort is my bed and pillow, and that’s only in sleep. And poor Tiffany. She’s tried so hard to cheer me up and sometimes it works but only briefly. My phone has been dead since Sunday and I’ve left it that way. No need to torture myself with whatever texts, if any, Jax might send.

  It’s midevening on Friday and my pathetic self is, again, in bed. Someone is beating on my door, but I ignore it and bury my head under my pillow. Probably Kolby, whom I want nothing to do with. Could be Jax, but I doubt it. More likely, it’s the bitch coming to warn me off, to rub in my face what is hers. The thought makes me furious. The knocking doesn’t cease, which angers me further, enough to make me get out of bed and throw the front door open.

  “What the hell do you wa—”

  Sandy comes barreling in, slams the door shut. She comes at me, grabs my arm, drags me to the couch, and shoves me down.

  Standing over me, she points her finger directly in my face. “Don’t say a goddamn word. Not a single peep until I’m done,” she shouts. “Got it?”

  I nod, too startled to utter a word.

  “All week you’ve avoided me and that is something you shouldn’t have done! You look like shit, but I don’t feel sorry for you. Why, you ask? Because all this self-loathing you’re doing is time you’ve wasted by blowing me off when I have very important information. Goddamn you,” she says and starts pacing. I want to tell her to hurry up and spit it out. That nothing she tells me is going to make me feel better, but I sit and silently watch her.

  Sandy stops and turns to face me. Grabbing my arms, she gives me a little shake. “He was set up. I swear! That picture, the one with her, with her hand down his pants, Jax did not want that! He ripped her hand away, but before he did, Kolby snapped a picture. I think he sent it to her, too. Your brother seemed to think it was hilarious. I badgered him about it but he shrugged me off saying Jax wanted it, that he was just embarrassed because he got caught with her hand in his pants. But girl, I know that’s bullshit. Jax did NOT want anything to do with her. You have to believe me.”

  I can’t hold my tongue. “He let her straddle his lap, let her kiss him. If he didn’t want her, then he wouldn’t have allowed it. The fact that he invited her, and me? Why? So I could witness what it really is, Sandy. His way of saying he’s with her, and intends to be with her, only proves I mean nothing to him. He got what he wanted from me and clearly proved that by his actions that night.” God, I don’t want to keep reliving the images of him with her. Or the fact that I was stupid enough to believe I meant more to him.

  Sandy slaps me, hard. I’m stunned, and stare at her, speechless, as I cup my cheek.

  “You listen to me and you listen to me good,” she shouts furiously at me. “Understand?”

  I nod.

  “I heard Kolby talking to Jaden and laughing, so I listened harder. Kolby had Jaden use some service that you can put in your cell phone number, or anyone’s number, and text whoever, and the recipient of the text will see it’s from said number, in this case, it was Jax’s number they used. They used his number to send you a text, which of course would come up as Jax. So that text was them getting you to come to the cabin and they set it up so that bitch, Timber, would be there too. I saw Jax’s reaction when she showed up!

  “Listen to me,” Sandy screams and shakes me as she does. “You and Jax were set up! They want you to hate him because Kolby, though he won’t admit it, doesn’t want to kick Jax out of the fraternity. But he’s adamant about keeping you two apart. It’s about Kolby’s reputation, about representing the fraternity and not going back on an oath that he created. The brothers won’t look kindly upon him if he dissolves and breaks down. Honestly, I don’t think any of those boys really giv
e two shits about it. I hear things, what they talk about when they don’t know I’m listening. And the shit I hear… girl! This is nothing.” She throws her hands up and sighs, exasperated.

  I think about this, and then a twisted thought pops in my head. “Well, I’m sick of all of it. Sick of his so-called pretending in order to appease my brother. If he can pretend, then so can I. Let’s see how he likes the same shit he’s shoved in my face, shoved in his face.”

  “Oh, girl. You’re scaring me.” Sandy plops down beside me, slings her arm over my shoulder, and gives me a devious smile. “But it’s brilliant. I like it!”

  “Hang on,” I tell Sandy as I lurch off the couch to retrieve my cell phone. I plug it in and wait for it to power up since the battery is dead.

  When there is enough juice to allow me to turn it on, I decide to be brave and text Jax. Ignoring the shitload of unopened texts, I immediately delete his previous texts and then type my text to him:

  K: I deleted all your texts, all your voicemails. Please don’t rehash whatever you’ve sent. I don’t need any sorry explanations. I get it, okay? You have to play up to my brother, who I’m certain is on to this little thing we had going on, but in order to save your ass, because I’m sure it needs saving, I regretfully need to part ways with you.

  I ponder and my finger is shaking, undecided whether to add more to the text or just send it and see what he says.

  “Send it,” Sandy scolds.

  I force myself to send it.

  His response is quicker than I anticipated.

  J: Don’t say that! We just have to be more careful. You showing up at the cabin was a bad idea. And I swear I didn’t invite that bitch! I swear, Kimber, and I didn’t invite her to sit on my lap. I know it looked bad, but again, I swear on my own brother’s grave that I only tried to shove her off but she wouldn’t budge. I didn’t kiss her back. You have to believe me.