Healing Hearts

by Donna K. Ford

  “The fresh air will do you good. You mentioned yesterday an interest in the lake.”

  Thankful Elaine hadn’t pushed for more details, Christian smiled and went with the casual conversation, but she sensed Elaine was keenly aware of her distance and reluctance to talk about her personal life. But as she considered the way Elaine had guided the conversation, Christian became acutely aware that Elaine was also avoiding. She had said something about night haunts, and Christian recalled the darkness shading her eyes. She recognized that pain, and her heart suddenly wept for her new friend.

  *

  Christian’s morning walks became a daily routine. She had been coming here for a week, drawn to the lake in the hope of seeing Alex sing to the sunrise. This morning, Alex had arrived earlier than usual and sat looking over the water. Her voice was hushed, and the melody of her song was mournful and filled Christian with longing.

  Although she couldn’t hear the words, the tone of Alex’s voice brought tears to Christian’s eyes, and she found herself weeping with the sunrise. Somehow, she found peace with this stranger who didn’t even know she was there. Today Christian felt a connection with Alex, who seemed to sing the pain for which Christian had been unable to find words.

  As she was filled with the comfort of Alex’s voice singing in the distance, she felt love fill her once again, and this time, the darkness did not come.

  Movement caught her eye as Alex stood. Christian watched as she bent and placed something in the water, faint ripples playing across the surface from the disturbance. Christian couldn’t see the object but made out the delicate flower Alex now extended and dropped into the water.

  Mesmerized, Christian watched as Alex wiped her eyes with the back of her hand and took her bow to the sun. This time, as she turned to leave, her steps were heavy and slow. Christian’s heart beat against her chest, her own pain mirroring the weight settling upon Alex’s shoulders.

  She sat motionless as Alex paused, then turned toward her. Christian caught her breath as Alex looked up and saw her sitting there watching. She hadn’t meant to intrude. She felt torn between her own grief and the sudden desire to wrap her arms around Alex and console her, to stop the pain and protect Alex from her sadness.

  As if sensing Christian’s understanding, Alex nodded once and turned quietly and walked away. Christian felt a sudden desire to go to her. She wanted to tell her she understood. But she knew she shouldn’t intrude. There had been something mournful in the song and the way Alex carried her body had been different from all the other mornings, and Christian knew as if by instinct that Alex needed to be alone. But she craved some connection with this mysterious woman who consumed her thoughts and seemed to understand her pain. There seemed to be so much beauty surrounding Alex, and Christian wondered what could have caused her so much sorrow.

  Chapter Three

  Alex sat on her porch, watching the sun play across the lake. It was warm, and she was happy to be able to sit outside again. Sipping her beer, she watched the small kayak slowly make its way around the cove. As she watched, she became aware of the woman in the boat, who seemed mesmerized by the rocks and growth along the bank. Alex thought she looked right, there on the water, like a flower blown in on the breeze. She warmed as she found herself smiling at this simple thought. She took in the woman, her auburn hair tucked behind her ears as it curled around to trace her jawline. The faint kiss of sun had only begun to darken her delicate skin, and she seemed to meld into the natural beauty around her.

  After some time, the boat turned and headed toward the little dock Alex kept down by the lake, and she found herself growing anxious about someone being so close. This was her safe place, her sanctuary. No one had ever been here in the two years she had made it her home. Getting to her feet, she made her way down the pebble path that led to the water. She watched as the boat glided up to the shore.

  The woman looked flushed from her effort and the warmth of the sun on her face. She wore sunglasses that hid her eyes, but Alex took in the sharp cut of the woman’s cheekbones and jawline, thinking her too thin for her strong shoulders.

  With a deep breath, Alex reluctantly steeled herself to do her best to be social. As she stepped from the shelter of the trees, she gasped as the woman slipped as she stepped from her boat, hitting her head on the dock and falling into the water.

  Jolting into a run, Alex jumped off the end of the dock and wrapped her arms around the motionless body. Heart racing, she took the woman into her arms, carrying her up the muddy bank and onto the dock. As she searched for signs of breath, she frantically called out, “Are you okay? Can you hear me?”

  The woman moaned as her eyes flickered and opened, peering up at Alex, lost and confused. “Cara?”

  Alex’s heart fluttered, and she felt her face redden as her hands gently held the woman’s face and she looked into the most beautiful green eyes she had ever seen. “Are you okay?” Alex asked with fear thick in her voice. The woman didn’t answer. “I’m going to take you up to the house. You hit your head pretty good.” Getting to her knees, Alex lifted the woman, gently sliding an arm behind her shoulders and the other behind her knees. Effortlessly, she lifted her into her arms, clutching her to her chest, relieved to feel her breath hot on her neck as her head pressed gently against Alex’s shoulder. An arm lay lazily around Alex’s shoulders and the other lay against her chest. Alex was surprised by how light she was. Holding her firmly, she made her way up the path to her home.

  *

  Christian began to wake up, stirring softly, becoming aware of the warmth surrounding her and the gentle caress of music. She let go of a sigh as she thought of Alex, singing to the sunrise each morning. Suddenly the singing stopped. Confused, Christian opened her eyes. A woman sat beside her, concern creasing her forehead as she frowned.

  “Feeling better?” the woman asked gently.

  Christian startled. “Where am I? What happened?”

  “You slipped down by my dock and banged your head pretty good. You’re in my cabin.”

  “Okay,” Christian said hesitantly, reaching a hand to her head, only now recognizing the persistent throb beating against her skull. “Alex?” Christian asked, recognizing her rescuer, and more than a little confused.

  “Yeah, that’s right,” Alex said, leaning back with a look of surprise on her face.

  “How long have I been here?” Christian could feel the embarrassment beginning to color her face.

  Smiling slightly, Alex placed a palm to Christian’s forehead and then her cheek. Christian felt her face warm from the heat of Alex’s touch.

  “You’re right, I’m Alex, Alex Moore,” she said, “and I guess you’ve been here about two hours now.”

  Panicked, Christian started to sit up, only then realizing she was naked under the blankets tucked neatly around her. Her eyes flashed to Alex as her hand grasped the edges of the blanket. Holy shit, where are my clothes? This was not how she had envisioned meeting Alex. She could only imagine what Alex must be thinking of her. How could she be such a flake? This could not be happening.

  “I’m sorry, but I had to remove your clothes,” Alex explained. “They were cold and wet from your fall into the lake. I was afraid you would get sick from the cold.”

  “Oh,” Christian stammered, her brow furrowing. “Thank you. My name is Christian,” she said, trying to figure out what to do next.

  “I know,” Alex said, matter-of-factly. “I recognized the logo on the kayak as one from Willow Springs. I called to let them know what had happened and that I had you here with me. They told me your name since you were the only guest out in one of the boats.”

  Christian was relieved someone knew where she was, but she still did not know what to do.

  “If you’re feeling better, once your clothes dry, I’ll be happy to take you back up to the lodge,” Alex continued.

  It was then Christian realized that talking was Alex’s way of trying to comfort her. It was working. Christian watched her mo
ve about the room as she talked, taking in her short hair, broad shoulders, lean muscles, and most of all her striking ice-blue eyes. “Oh my God,” she whispered as a pulse began to thrum in her center. And suddenly she felt a bit like Alice, tumbling down the rabbit hole. She wasn’t sure what was happening to her. Sure, she had watched Alex from a distance, but nothing had prepared her for this.

  As if sensing Christian’s discomfort, Alex came and sat next to her again, a worried look on her face. “What is it?” she asked.

  “Nothing, I just realized I’ve seen you before. I didn’t mean to intrude, but I’ve seen you down by the lake in the mornings. Haven’t I?” she said, more a statement than a question, not wanting to sound like she had been stalking Alex. She could feel the heat she pulled from Alex’s body as Alex’s thigh pressed against her side through the blanket.

  Thoughtfully, Alex said, “I go to the lake every morning, yes. I remember seeing you there, although I wouldn’t have known it was you.”

  “I recognized your voice,” Christian said in a whisper. “You were singing when I woke up.” Christian apologized again. “I’m sorry. I’m just trying to get my bearings. I didn’t mean to intrude.”

  Every emotion she had experienced while observing Alex from a distance came flooding back. She let her eyes linger over the strong, lean hands she had watched create the vase on the potter’s wheel, and she imagined those hands touching her, lingering on her skin like a cool breeze. She watched the movements of Alex’s body as she talked, wondering how someone could have so much grace with so much strength. There was no denying her attraction to Alex and the thought planted the seed of panic. She didn’t even know Alex. She wasn’t ready for feelings like this. Christian shifted uncomfortably, pulling the blanket up to her chin as if the plush fabric could shelter her from her own desires.

  The expression on Alex’s face softened as she smiled down at Christian. “Listen, I can’t imagine it feels very comfortable to wake up in a strange place with a strange woman, to find you have no clothes. I have some dry things you can slip into that may help you feel a little less exposed.”

  Sighing in relief, Christian smiled back, finding that the brief closeness had left her skin hot. She almost gasped from the sudden lack of contact. “That would be great, thank you.”

  “No problem,” Alex said, patting Christian’s hand softly. “I’ll be right back.”

  Christian listened to the footsteps pad softly across the floor as Alex left the room. Alone now, she began to take in her surroundings. She was on a brown leather sofa, the leather worn from use, allowing it to meld to the weight of her body as if it were cradling her. She was facing a beautiful fireplace, made of gray stacked stone, that roared with the life of a new fire. The mantel was a large roughhewn timber that looked like it had once been a mighty oak. It stretched the width of the fireplace and matched the exposed rafters overhead. For the first time, Christian noted the temperature and guessed Alex had started the fire to help warm her and to prevent further shock, since the room was warmer than would normally be comfortable. She found it soothing.

  Above the fireplace hung a painting of a striking blond woman dressed in what appeared to be a black evening gown. The fabric draped across her shoulders and was open down her back, revealing creamy smooth skin, the slight lift of a shoulder blade, and the curve of her spine leading down to the gentle swell of her hips. She sat with her back to the artist with her head turned slightly over her right shoulder as if looking back at someone. She appeared to be holding something to her chest, and the gentle curve of her lips emphasized the sparkle in her blue eyes, their gaze playful and sensual. As Christian gazed at the portrait, warmth flooded her body, wrapping her in a feeling of welcome. She wondered who the woman was. She was obviously important to Alex to have earned such a bold position in the room. The thought struck her that Alex might have a partner, and she grew even more self-conscious about her attraction to her.

  Christian started as Alex came back into the room, holding out a pair of sweatpants and a long-sleeved T-shirt. Christian saw Alex’s brow furrow slightly when she saw her looking at the painting.

  “They may be a little big on you, but they should do.”

  “Thank you,” Christian said, suddenly aware of the shift in Alex, as a strange discomfort flashed in her eyes and her body tensed.

  Alex shifted from foot to foot. “I’ll just go back to the…other room to give you some privacy,” she finally managed.

  Christian felt her face grow warm, realizing Alex had already seen her naked. She felt exposed and vulnerable, both afraid and excited at the thought of what it must have taken for Alex to get her here, and of Alex’s strong hands undressing her, touching her. Her head felt like it would burst as the pressure intensified behind her eyes. She groaned and massaged her temples, wondering how things had gotten so messed up. She couldn’t imagine what Alex must think of her. She must look ridiculous. How had this happened?

  The clothes were loose on her, which was a small comfort, since she didn’t have a bra and her nipples had hardened at the thought of Alex touching her. The soft cotton brushing against her swollen breasts only intensified the reaction. Christian crossed her arms over her chest to hide herself. She had to get a grip.

  *

  Alex trembled as she stood grasping the edge of the sink in the bathroom. “Keep it together,” she said repeatedly to herself. “She’s okay. It’s not like before. She’s okay.”

  Alex flashed back to seeing Christian hit the dock and her lifeless body floating in the water. “She’s okay,” she repeated.

  Something about Christian had drawn her to the dock, had made her want to reach out when she saw her kayak on the water. When she had pulled Christian out of the water and Christian had looked up at her for that brief moment when their eyes met, Alex had felt like she was holding an angel. She had touched the cool skin of Christian’s face, brushing the wet strands of hair from her cheek. Something had shifted inside Alex at that moment, a softening of her defenses, and a longing for tenderness. When she had undressed Christian, she had tried to divert her eyes as much as possible from the soft swell of breasts, the firm flat stomach, and the small triangle of neatly trimmed hair between her legs. But she couldn’t help but think of how beautiful Christian was, and how fragile she’d seemed.

  Alex felt an innate desire to protect Christian. She’d listened to Christian’s breathing for at least the first hour, her stomach clenched in knots. She had feared the injury might have been more serious than it appeared, and she’d struggled with what she should do. When Christian had begun to mumble in her sleep, Alex had finally convinced herself that Christian was okay.

  She struggled to understand this feeling of connection to a woman she had never met before. She had only experienced a similar emotion once in her life, and it was difficult for her to imagine it was happening again now.

  *

  Having finally dressed, Christian began to look around the room. Alex had been gone for a while, and she found her curiosity getting the better of her. The front room of the cabin was open, with high ceilings and exposed timbers, and the exterior wall was mostly glass that allowed the sunlight to pour into the room. A large porch with a view overlooking the lake ran the length of the house. Christian could see the small dock, with her kayak pulled up onto the grass.

  She tried to remember what had happened and suddenly felt foolish to have been so careless. She’d thought the spells were getting better, but she shouldn’t have pushed herself. Studying the length of yard from the dock to the house and the small winding path that joined the two, she wondered how Alex had managed to get her to the house.

  As she thought of Alex, she remembered strong arms holding her tightly. She remembered feeling safe and surrendering to that strength as she was wrapped in protective arms. Shaking her head slightly to rid herself of the feeling of needing someone, she turned to find Alex standing in the doorway, watching her.

  Christian smiled.
“You carried me, didn’t you?”

  Softly, as if understanding her thoughts, Alex nodded, never taking her eyes from Christian’s.

  “I don’t know what to say. Thank you. I’m terribly sorry to have caused so much trouble,” Christian said nervously. She wished the sweats had pockets so she could hide her trembling hands.

  Alex strode over to her. “I’m just glad I was there to help. You still seem a little shaky,” she said as she took Christian’s hand. “Please sit down. Can I make you dinner? It might help if you had something to eat.”

  Christian looked down at their entwined hands, feeling the gentle pressure of the long lean fingers caressing her own. The touch was warm and tender, and Christian felt her body begin to melt. The power of the sensation surprised her, and she pulled her hand away.

  “No…really,” Christian said. “I shouldn’t impose on you any further.”

  Studying Christian for a moment, Alex casually stepped away. “Well,” she said, “I haven’t eaten yet and I’m hungry. I’d like the company if you’ll stay a while longer.” Her face was smooth and confident, as if she knew Christian wouldn’t be able to refuse the offer for fear of offending her.

  Christian didn’t want to be rude, so she agreed. “Okay,” she acquiesced, “but only if you allow me to help you.”

  Smiling, Alex nodded. “Right this way. I hope you like steak. I was planning to grill.”

  “That sounds perfect,” Christian said, watching Alex glide across the room in front of her. Her eyes played down the length of Alex’s beautiful, strong body, taking in the taut lean muscles of her shoulders and how her back tapered to thin hips and the round firm curve of her butt. Christian felt the muscles in her stomach tighten, and she froze in midstep, shocked by the sensation of wanting another woman. She pushed the feeling away, resolving not to focus on the physical prowess of her host. Her life was confusing enough without complicating things with this strange infatuation with Alex. She was supposed to be figuring out who she wanted to be now, what she wanted to do with her life. This was just another way of avoiding what she really needed to be doing. So what if she found Alex attractive? She was attractive. She was having a normal physical response, that was all. It didn’t mean anything.