All Falls Down

by Morgen, Ayden K.

  "I think I like knowing that," he says, winking at me.

  My entire body blushes this time.

  He notices and grins, mischief radiating from him. "I really think I like knowing that."

  I lean forward a little more, my mouth open. When he leans forward too, his expression ravenous, I lose the ability to breathe. The hungry way he looks at me pins me to my seat.

  "You're fucking ravishing, Savannah. Don't ever question that."

  A wave of heat hits me and I sway.

  The waitress suddenly appears and Jared leans back, picking up his menu.

  I blink a few times as she introduces herself and takes our drink order.

  All I can think is, Oh Lord. Oh dear, sweet Lord.

  The rest of the meal goes surprisingly well. Jared is charming, and I find myself relaxing more and more. His words echo in my mind, easing me. It's hard not to believe he meant what he said when he looks at me as if he's dying to kiss me.

  I feel like the only woman in the world when he focuses his attention solely on me, ignoring everything around us.

  By silent agreement, we keep the conversation light. Our likes and dislikes, favorite bands and movies. I'm surprised to find just how much we have in common, from our mutual hatred of reality television and Justin Bieber to our appreciation of independent films and classic literature to our love of Ray Lamontagne and La Rocca.

  The food is delicious and I eat every bite on my plate. Our waitress appears every once in a while to refill our glasses or see if we need anything, but otherwise she's blessedly absent. It's just me and Jared in our own little bubble.

  Throughout the meal, he reaches across the small table to touch me… my hands, my face. Each brush is innocent, but my skin sings at the press of his fingers. He seems to experience the exact same sensation. His eyes actually close halfway once and he sighs as if relieved before leaning back and picking up his fork again.

  When I finish the most amazing baklava I've ever had, he trails his fingertip across my lips to capture the bit of honey smeared there. I nearly moan aloud, that small, intimate touch reigniting the spark he set to flaming earlier.

  He brings his finger to his mouth and pops it inside, his gaze never leaving mine.

  "Mm," he says, a wicked grin on his face, "delicious."

  Tingling heat suffuses my body. A soft groan whispers from my lips.

  We stare at each other for a long time. The desire in his eyes spears through me again, kicking butterflies into flight in my stomach, sending a pleasurable ache scratching through me. I can't remember the last time I wanted someone so badly. Hell, I don't think I ever have.

  I shift in the booth, trying to ease the ache tearing through me.

  Jared finally drops his hand and exhales.

  "I think we need to get out of here," he murmurs, his voice gritty.

  I nod and wipe my mouth, not trusting myself to speak. If I do, something ridiculous and completely mortifying will come out. Better not to risk it.

  The waitress materializes with the check almost immediately. Jared doesn't even glance at it before reaching into his pocket to pull out his wallet. He hands over a credit card and tells her that we'll meet her at the hostess booth. She beams at both of us and vanishes.

  Jared runs a hand through his unruly hair and slides from the booth.

  "Ready, beautiful girl?" He holds his hand out to me.

  I take it and allow him to pull me up. My body brushes against his, his obvious erection pressing into my stomach.

  Oh. God.

  He groans softly before stepping back, my hand in his.

  I stumble along at his side in silence, my mind racing. My body screams at me. I've never been so aroused in my life. And I'm really not sure where that leaves us now. As much as I want him… I'm not ready to take that step, and I have no idea if he expects me to.

  He was gentle last night. He never pushed or even suggested it. But that was last night.

  What happens today?

  What if I can't please him?

  You're frigid, Savannah.

  I flinch away from Toby's voice in my head, shoving it back down where it belongs.

  I'm not sure if he's right about me or not. I hated having sex with him – hated how dirty I felt afterward, like the things he demanded I do for him tainted me inside and out. I think maybe that was his fault, but I'm not sure. I've never been with anyone else.

  Jared signs the receipt and the waitress passes his credit card back to him.

  She smiles at both of us again and wishes us a good day. The overwhelmed hostess is nowhere to be found.

  The sun shines bright on my face when Jared holds the door open for me to step out. I let my eyes fall closed and just stand there for a minute, shoving my worries out of my mind and soaking in the warmth. It's been days since the sun last made an appearance.

  I've missed it.

  "Have you ever been to the Botanical Gardens?" Jared asks, stepping up behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist.

  I practically melt into him.

  He lowers his chin to my shoulder and places a soft kiss on the side of my neck.

  "Mmhmm," I hum. "They're beautiful."

  "They are," he agrees. "Would you go with me?"

  "Now?" I peer over my shoulder at him. "Won't the girls expect us home soon?"

  "Yes, now." He smiles and squeezes me. "We have all afternoon, and there's something I want to show you."

  He seems so excited, I just can't tell him no.

  I don't really want to anyway.

  "We're going to get in trouble," I prophesize half an hour later as he leads me across the damp grass at the Botanical Gardens, a thick blanket in his hands. Besides a tiny little boy running from his mother across a clearing a few yards ahead, we're the only two ignoring the sidewalk. We're bound to get in trouble.

  "We are not," Jared answers, grinning at me, "But I'll take full responsibility if we do."

  I sigh, surrendering when he brushes a kiss across my knuckles and leads me through the maze of plants. The Gardens are absolutely breathtaking. Vibrant, vivid color blooms everywhere. A soft breeze wafts the scent of thousands of plants all around us. Water rushes in little ponds and fountains.

  I think I'm in heaven.

  "I'd forgotten how beautiful it is here," I murmur.

  "It is. They put a lot of work into maintaining it." Jared pushes aside the trailing branches of a weeping willow and ducks underneath, disappearing from sight.

  I glance back at the trail again and realize no one's watching us.

  I follow after him quickly.

  He releases the branches and they fall around us, shutting out the rest of the world. It's dimmer underneath and the branches rustle with the wind.

  Jared takes my hand in his again.

  "Careful. The roots are growing out of the ground."

  "It wasn't planted deeply enough." I step carefully over a large, exposed root.

  "Hmm?"

  "The tree," I explain. "Weeping willow roots grow upward. They have to be planted deeply or they break through the ground. Eventually, the tree will have to be cut down."

  "I think it's safe for now," he says. "It hasn't gone wild yet. Do you garden?"

  "No."

  He looks to me for explanation.

  "There used to be one at the Talbot estate. Matthew and Caitlyn had to have it cut down when the roots started breaking through the sidewalk." I used to love sitting underneath that tree to read. It was so quiet, my own little world. Matthew offered to have another planted for me when it was cut down, but it just wouldn't have been the same. Besides, asking him to plant a tree for me wouldn't have been fair. I was just the maid's daughter.

  "Ah." Jared draws to a stop at the far side of the tree. "Close your eyes."

  I obey instantly when he reaches for the branches to push them aside. He helps me duck from beneath them and then leads me a few feet forward before stopping. The sun shines directly overhead.

>   Jared steps up behind me again and wraps his arms around me.

  As usual, I melt into him.

  No one has ever held me like he does… as if I'm priceless, something to cherish and protect. In his embrace, I'm safe, warm in a way I've never felt before. I fit against him perfectly; our bodies lining up in a way that makes me think I belong in his arms. Like maybe his broad chest was designed specifically for me to rest against.

  "Open your eyes, beautiful girl," he whispers, his lips at my ear. His breath washes across my skin, pulling a shiver from me.

  My eyes flutter open.

  "Oh!" I gasp.

  We're in a little clearing, and it's absolutely beautiful. Weeping willows surround it on three sides. A pond cuts through the other side, with hibiscus bushes growing up in columns around it. The area is completely isolated from the populated trails, hidden from sight. Wildflowers grow everywhere, pops of color running wild.

  "It's so beautiful," I whisper, just taking in the sight before me.

  Jared presses a kiss to my cheek, right beside my ear. "I thought you'd appreciate it."

  "I do," I breathe. It's almost… magical. A little fairytale world tucked away, waiting for someone to come along and discover it. "How did you know this was here?"

  He steps back and takes my hand in his again, pulling me into the center of the clearing before tossing the blanket down and sitting. He eases me down with him, cradling me between his legs, against his chest. His arms wrap around me again, pulling me close, before he answers. "My mom has volunteered here for as long as I can remember. She's terrible at keeping any kind of plant alive, but she loves to come out here and dig her fingers into the soil. She says it grounds her."

  The more Jared tells me about his mom, the more I like her. She sounds so full of life, like Caitlyn always was.

  "I came here with her a lot when they first adopted me," he says, a smile in his voice. "The staff let me explore while she helped with the planting and weeding. I was hell on wheels for the most part, but I always loved it here. It was very calming."

  "I always thought so too," I tell him.

  "Really?"

  "Yeah. I didn't get to come often, but when I did, I always felt like I should whisper, you know? I thought I'd upset the natural order of things if I talked too loudly." A blush suffuses my cheeks, embarrassment whispering through me at my admission. "I may have read too much."

  Jared kisses my neck again. "I know what you mean. I think mom brought me with her so often because I was so quiet when I was here. I just felt less restless. It gave her a break from trying to keep up with me during the summers."

  "You found this place then?" I ask curiously, leaning further into him. I can't really imagine him as a precocious little boy. He's so put together now. So in control. For some reason, it relieves me that he was a wild child. After what he went through with his biological father, he deserved the opportunity to be a little boy. Knowing he got that chance makes me happy.

  "Yeah," he says.

  "Well, it's beautiful."

  He tilts my head back and kisses me.

  His lips are soft and inviting against mine. Reality slips away, my attention focused on the way our mouths move together and the way heat twists through me.

  He turns me around carefully and settles me on his lap.

  I balance myself with my hands on his shoulders and just stare at him.

  "So are you," he finally whispers, reaching up to touch my cheek again. "So beautiful."

  The simple way he says this causes something to unfurl in my chest. For the first time, I take the lead and kiss him. His lips part beneath mine, his tongue darting out to tease along my bottom lip.

  "Jared," I moan softly.

  He shifts me closer and I grasp his shoulders, deepening the kiss. Our tongues come together, break apart, and then come together again. He groans, his hands moving up and down my back. I wriggle on his lap, trying to ease the pressure building low in my stomach, between my legs.

  I have goose bumps everywhere as we move against one another, panting and groaning.

  His hard heat burns through his jeans and he feels so good to me.

  Cupping my head in his hand, he begins to lie back, pulling me down with him.

  I stiffen and he instantly stops moving.

  "Jared, I–"

  "Just lay with me, beautiful girl," he whispers against my lips. "Nothing else."

  Just lay… I can do that.

  I relax slowly and let him pull us to the ground. We kiss languidly for long moments. The sun is warm on my back, he's so gentle, and everything is just right. He rolls us over, laying me carefully on the blanket beneath him, his hand still supporting my head.

  I squint against the sun and he breaks the kiss. He's hovering over me, staring down at me with this expression… It's light and dark and it pierces me, a bolt of desire tearing through me.

  He leans down, pressing his forehead against mine. His eyes bore into me and take my breath away again. "Is it too soon to be falling in love with you?" he whispers.

  He's falling in love with me.

  I take a deep breath and shake my head, stunned by his words and the emotion behind them. I can't speak. Can't think of a single word, in fact.

  "You own me completely, Savannah," he murmurs. "Completely."

  "Kiss me," I breathe, reaching up to tangle my hands in his hair.

  His lips meet mine again, and for the first time in my life, I know what perfection is.

  It's Jared, flowers, and warm sunshine on my face.

  Chapter Ten: Together Again

  The afternoon passes in a blanket of wildflowers and a sea of drugging kisses. Puffy clouds pass overhead. Jared and I lay together, talking quietly. Our touches are soft, and our kisses slow. We don't speak again of his confession, but the words still course through me, unwinding slowly, filling me with sensations I'm not even sure I know how to describe.

  Everything is so soft and warm, as if he's smoothed away every blemish and erased every stain that Toby left behind. I'm comfortable in my own skin. I can't even remember the last time I felt this way.

  People call out to one another on occasion, but for the most part, nothing intrudes in our little hideaway. The gurgle of water drowns out traffic. The earthy scent of plants and flowers mask the odors of the city.

  It's just me, Jared, and sunshine.

  It doesn't last though.

  As the afternoon draws to a close, Jared lifts me to my feet and we return to the car, his fingers linked with mine. He lifts my hand to his lips periodically, perhaps sensing the unease fighting to break through and twist the afternoon into something darker in my mind. He tries to ease me with the press of his lips to my skin, but storm clouds start roiling inside of me again.

  I try to push them back and cling to what he's given me today, but as he speeds toward the mansion, I can't. Somewhere up ahead, reality waits for me. And reality is still a bitch.

  Jared reaches out to stroke my cheek.

  "Will I see you later?" I ask.

  He glances over at me and smiles. "Wild horses couldn't keep me away from you tonight, beautiful girl."

  His response is beautiful, and I find myself wanting to kiss him and cry at the same time. He's so perfect. Not in that flawless way, but in a completely different way. He knows what he wants and he isn't afraid to reach for it, isn't afraid to tell me what he's thinking or how he feels. How I make him feel. But he's not really mine.

  Even if he doesn't love her, he's Lexi's.

  Clouds blot out a little more of the sunshine he's given me. I want to ask him to promise me not to touch her, but I can't find the voice to do it. I think I'm afraid of what he might say if I do.

  "I'll miss you," he says a few minutes later. "Not being able to kiss you is torture for me, Savannah." He smiles at me sadly and runs his index finger across my lips before dropping his hand again. He laces it with mine once more, squeezing my fingers.

  His words should be eno
ugh to silence the unease rushing through me, but they're not. My hand shakes in his when Demetri opens the gates a few minutes later with a polite wave to both of us. He's so tall and muscular. His ebony skin is gorgeous. He can't see our clasped hands, but I have to fight the urge to slink down in my seat anyway.

  Maddi and Kit stand outside the front door of the mansion, speaking to Jared's brother. Chris is a mountain of a man with an easy smile. He makes me uncomfortable, though I'm not sure why. Maybe because he's just so massive.

  Toby was big… huge.

  We creep up the driveway.

  My heart actually seems to tremble in my chest.

  "Stay with me," Jared whispers, parking the car neatly in front of the sprawling mansion. His eyes cut to mine, pleading with me. "Don't go there."

  I try to smile at him and fail miserably.

  It was so easy in the dark of night and in our own little bubble to forget that my life isn't perfect. Staring out the window at the mansion, it's impossible to forget it. I feel like Cinderella again. Only I have no glass slipper to leave behind. All I have is my heart, and I'm not nearly confident enough to believe it's enough.

  Is Lexi in love with him? Will she hate me if she finds out about this?

  Hope and reality crash together somewhere in the middle of my chest, leaving me unnerved and uncomfortable. How can I face the girls and smile when I'm lying to them? Carrying on with their sister's boyfriend behind her back?

  "Savannah?"

  "I'm okay," I lie to him.

  I think he knows it's not true.

  I can't just go from being with him to not being with him in the amount of time it takes to close the car door behind me. I need distance first, a moment to regroup and breathe. But the girls are watching us from the steps and I don't have that time. I don't even have time to explain what I'm thinking about.

  It's now or never.

  I squeeze his hand before slipping it from his and reaching for the door handle. Maddi and Kit call out greetings when I step from the car. They're both smiling at me, trust and affection evident in their expressions.