After her first marriage, her first attempt at loving had been with Braden, but that had failed and done absolutely nothing for her confidence. And this time, with Kyle, Reanna felt like she had gotten it right. She was marrying for love. She would finally have the wedding she’d always dreamed of having to a man who was far better than the man of her dreams.
She had hoped Tamara would be proud of her for that … but so far, it looked as if her sister was indifferent, which was okay. Reanna had never been one for backing down from a challenge. Even if it took her time, she was prepared to get her little sister on board with the idea of her and Kyle’s union. It was worth it to her.
Which was why she’d spent the last hour in one of the luxurious, pink waiting areas of Tamara’s Manhattan store, relaxing back on the plush white couch with Ronaldo and Tamara, telling her little sister how magical her weekend with Kyle had been.
“So, he took you to a luxury cabin in the mountain, where you two spent three days getting to know each other, confessing love, telling each other the truth, finally, and getting busy non-stop, huh?”
Reanna smiled slightly. Well, the words didn’t exactly capture the essence of the weekend, but that was fine. There was no possible way Reanna could actually capture how amazing her weekend with Kyle had been using mere words. It had been too profound, too incredible for that.
So, making the decision to not further push how amazing the weekend had been, Reanna nodded her head. “Yes,” she answered, slight laughter in her voice. “That sounds about right.”
“Hmm,” Tamara nodded in response, “sounds nice. So when did he …”
Reanna smiled as she reached into the pocket of her jeans and removed her ring. “He proposed yesterday morning, and it was … perfect.” Staring at the ring now made the widest, dorky grin spread across her face. “I was doing my hair, trying to look ‘morning sexy’ because he’d been in the kitchen cooking breakfast—”
“He cooked for you?” Ronaldo exclaimed.
Reanna laughed, nodding her head. “Every single meal we had while we were away.”
“I’m ’bout to faint, bubbles. Damn.”
“Shut up, Ron,” she chuckled. “Anyway, back to the story. As I was doing my hair, I noticed something huge—”
“As fuck,” Ronaldo sang. “Huge as fuck.”
“Huge A-F,” Reanna corrected herself. “On my ring finger, and I freaked. I ran to the kitchen and that was where he proposed, down on both knees.”
“Ooo,” Ronaldo sang yet again. “Two knees. This is serious, girl.”
Reanna placed her hand to her heart, nodding her head once again. “It was adorable,” she sighed, poking her lips out in a pout. “He said he’d been terrified that I’d say no, so he’d went ahead and put the ring on my finger in hopes that I’d like it so much, I wouldn’t want to take it off. But if I didn’t want to marry him, then I’d have to remove it.”
Ronaldo laughed. “That’s cute.”
“I told you …”
“And you said yes, Reanna?” Tamara’s rhetorical question caught her attention. “After three days, you two feel that you’re ready for this?”
“Yes,” Reanna answered her sister with absolutely no hesitation. “It’s crazy, because at first I thought we’d be one of those couples that dated for like … years before he proposed. We had discussed it the night before because he’d asked me to move in with him and Sofia.”
Tamara’s eyes shot wide. “Move in!”
“Right?” Reanna chuckled. “That was my exact reaction. Like, dude, have you lost it? That was when I told him I don’t live with my boyfriends, that I have to be engaged before I move in with a guy. His response had been so … silent, that I’d hadn’t expected it when he proposed.”
“Wow,” Tamara said, slight amusement in her voice. “I can’t believe he wanted you to move in so soon.”
Reanna shrugged. “It was sweet, though. He seemed so disappointed when I said no.” Actually that disappointment had nearly made Reanna rethink her decision. “I suppose I understand why he was upset that I’d said no at first. I hate being apart from him and Sofia, too—”
“Hold up,” Tamara cut her off, lifting her hand to silence Reanna. “At first?” She shook her head. “Reanna, tell me you aren’t actually considering it.”
Reanna shrugged once more as a breathy laugh fell from her lips. “I’m not considering, Tamara. I am.”
“You’re moving out!”
Leaning back, Reanna flinched at her sister’s sharp tone, watching her as she abruptly shot up from the couch and began pacing back and forth in front of her and Ronaldo, distress very evident in her features.
Reanna’s brows rose. Okay, that was unexpected, and a little alarming. She was angry … no, maybe not angry, but an intense anxiety was radiating off of her. It was obvious something Reanna had just said had struck a nerve.
“All right, Mara. Calm down now,” Ronaldo said.
He looked over to Reanna, a sad smile on his face as if to say he hadn’t wanted to be right about Tamara’s reaction to the news, and Reanna reached over and gave his hand a comforting squeeze. It wasn’t his fault. Tamara was a brat sometimes, not much of a fan of change. She should have known telling her that everything was about to be different wouldn’t be too easy.
Sighing, she looked back to her pacing younger sister. “Tamara—”
“You’re moving out of the house, Reanna!” she yelled as she came to an abrupt stop. “Of our house. What the hell, Rea?”
Reanna opened her mouth, then quickly closed it, unsure of what to say now. Shit. It was obvious that she’d taken a wrong turn, failed at her attempt to get Tamara on her side, but she wasn’t quite sure how to get things back on a less … emotional track.
“Tamara,” Reanna said softly, “I’m confused …”
“What is so confusing?”
She blinked, giving a light shake of her head. “Your whole reaction to this.”
“Reanna, you’re talking about moving out of our home. Our fucking house. The first place that has ever belonged to us. You’re leaving to move in with a man who just confessed his love to you only three damn days ago!”
“But you knew …” Reanna let her words trail off when she realized that she’d just raised her voice.
No. She didn’t want that. This was not a fight, or at least she wasn’t going to let it turn into one. She was just trying to ease whatever fear it was that was keeping her sister from understanding why she and Kyle’s relationship had progressed as quickly as it had.
So, calming herself, Reanna took a deep breath, and talked to her sister in a calmer tone.
“Tamara,” she began softly, “you knew how I felt about him before I did. You are the one that tried to convince me he felt the same.”
“I know that,” she argued angrily. “I wanted you to stop running away from who I knew your heart really wanted, and I was happy for you when you left with him because I knew you’d finally have him. I just …” She shook her head. “This is too much, Rea. I thought that you’d be dating him. Not moving out of the house and running to the altar all in a matter of days!”
Reanna frowned, shaking her head at her sister’s words. “Kyle and I have known each other much longer than a few days, Tamara,” she rationalized. “We’ve been in love for a long time.”
“I understand that,” she stated firmly. “But during the majority of that time, Kyle has been courting another fucking woman.”
Reanna rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t go as far as to say that he was courting Aniyah, Tamara.”
“Then what the hell do you call a near two-year relationship, Reanna?”
“They weren’t in a relationship.”
“Oh my God!” Tamara’s hand shot up to her face just as she released a frustrated grunt. “Are you serious, Reanna? Are you fucking serious right now?”
Though she was feeling a bit annoyed with her sister’s arguing, and the tone in which she was using to do i
t, Reanna kept her mouth shut and nodded her head in response.
Yes, she had indeed been very much serious.
“You know what, Tamara,” Reanna sighed tiredly, bringing up a hand in surrender, “I can’t explain to you every single thing that happened over the course of my weekend with Kyle, nor can I relay to you every word that was said between us. Because, honestly, it was personal. So you’re just going to have to take my word for it.”
“Take your word for it?”
“Yes!” This time Reanna didn’t back down from raising her voice. “I’m not a freaking child, Tamara. I am fully capable of making a decision that I know is right for me. Kyle is good to me—amazing, gentle, sweet—and for the first time in my life, I’m in love. I feel loved. He understands me on a level that nobody has ever understood me before. The man is my freaking soul mate for God’s sake! We connect. Dating didn’t feel like enough of a commitment to us. We’re both ready for more. What is so wrong with that?”
“What’s wrong is you didn’t take the time needed to make sure that this was what you wanted forever, Rea!” Tamara shouted, now visibly shaking with her irrational anger. “How the hell do you go from running from love, to embracing it so fucking hard that you’re willing to change everything!”
“I’m getting married, Tamara!” she screamed, now feeling her own irritation rising. “I’m not uprooting my entire life, I’m just …” she shook her head, searching for the words she wanted to say, “moving forward.” Yes, that was it. “I’m moving forward with my life. Doing something that I want to do. I want Kyle as my husband, and Sofia as my daughter. I need to live with them, see them when I wake up every morning and before I sleep every night. I long for a family …”
Tamara’s eyes widened, and what Reanna discerned as sadness flashed through them. “Oh I’m sorry,” she said, her voice slightly shaking. “I was under the impression that we were a family.”
“Stop that, Mara,” Ronaldo spoke up. “That ain’t fair. You know that isn’t what she meant.”
“Then what the hell does ‘I want a family’ mean, Ron?”
“You can just ask me, Tamara,” Reanna stated. “I’m standing right here. I don’t need Ron to explain what I meant.” She was fully capable of doing by her damn self. “I know that you and Ronaldo are my family. What I’m saying is that just the two of you are not enough for me.”
“So now we’re not enough?” she asked, her voice rising.
“No!” Reanna snapped. “How the hell could you be? I want a life, Tamara. I want everything we missed out on—a loving home, a loving family, a good life. What the hell is so bad about me wanting that for myself!”
She was shaking now; emotion was causing her voice to tremble. She was having a hard time understanding why Tamara wasn’t getting it!
Even now, the woman just stood, staring at her with the most infuriating blank expression. She wasn’t saying a word, but the silence … Reanna swore the silence between them was saying everything for her.
“Tamara, that’s enough,” Reanna said, clenching her teeth tightly. “It’s obvious that this isn’t going to be resolved today, so I think I’ll just go.”
“Go?”
“I agree, y’all.” Ronaldo rose from the couch. “This is getting a little too intense. Y’all need to cool off, take a break for the rest of the day. Maybe we’ll finish discussing this at home … over dinner and about eight or nine bottles of wine.”
“We’ll have to talk tomorrow, actually.” Reanna grabbed her purse and stood from the couch. “I’ll be staying in Manhattan tonight … with Kyle and Sofia.”
“Are you serious?”
Reanna rolled her eyes. “Yes, Tamara,” she answered sharply. “Kyle and I would like to tell Sofia that we’re getting married together, if that’s all right with you …”
“And when is this move supposed to be happening?”
Jesus Christ, please save me, Reanna thought with a frustrated grunt. “Kyle wants me to move in as soon as possible.”
“He wants you to …”
Reanna turned back to face her sister. “I want to as well, Tamara. He isn’t forcing me to do anything I don’t want to do.”
Even when she and Kyle weren’t a couple Reanna had hated when she had to leave him and Sofia to go back home to Pleasant View. Now, they were her family, and living apart from them—even for a night—didn’t feel right to her.
Of course Tamara, in all of her selfishness, didn’t even attempt to try and understand Reanna’s reasoning for not wanting to go back to Pleasant View for the evening. She instead continued to argue.
“So you’re not coming home then?” she asked, shock and anger evident in her voice.
Reanna’s fists clenched tight at her sides as she fought against her anger. “I just told you—”
“And what the hell does ‘as soon as possible’ mean, Reanna? You need to come home tonight so that we can discuss this.”
“There is nothing to discuss!” Reanna yelled. “This is my life, and my decision, and it’s your choice whether you choose to accept it or not. I don’t need to discuss any of this with you …”
“I’m your sister!”
“Exactly!” Reanna clutched on to her purse tightly. “You’re my sister, and you’re suppose to be supporting me.”
“Not when I think you’re making a stupid decision …”
“Oh my Gosh!” Reanna threw up her hands in frustration. “That’s it. I’m done with this. Seriously, Tamara.” She pointed a finger in her sister’s direction. “You take whatever time you need to come to terms with all of this, then you call and we’ll have a rational discussion. I refuse to deal with you when you’re like this.”
“You have to deal with me, you’re my sister!”
Reanna shook her head. “I don’t, and I’m leaving …”
“But we just got into a fight, Reanna!” she shouted. “You need to come home so we can work it out.”
“What are you not understanding about this?” Reanna snapped, the sharp scream in her voice causing her sister to go silent.
Usually she wasn’t one for screaming like that, especially at her sister, but she was being pushed too far. And she hated feeling this way, but she didn’t want to be around Tamara—not while she was like this. All she’d wanted was her sister’s blessing, her love, her support, and maybe a few pats on the back because she’d finally found the courage to take the next step in her life. But no. Instead of being a good sister, of being happy for her, all Tamara seemed to want to do was argue, and Reanna had had enough of it.
“Listen to me, Tamara.” She said her words slowly in an effort to ensure Tamara heard each of them. “I am not going back to the house.” Plain, simple, and to the point. She placed her hand to her heart. “That is not my home anymore.” She shook her head. “And maybe you’ll understand this more when you fall madly in love with whomever you spend the rest of your life with, but I just … can’t live in a home where Sofia and Kyle are not. They are my home now …” Even as she said the words her eyes began to fill with tears. Kyle and Sofia were her beating heart, and she could no longer imagine calling anywhere but the place the three of them could live together home. She didn’t want to do that anymore. “Wherever they are, is where I’ll be, and you can come find me whenever you decide to talk to me like you have some sense …”
And that was it. It was all she was going to say. Not because she didn’t have anything else to say, but because she refused to give this argument anymore of her time.
Turning away from Tamara, Reanna headed for the exit, only to be stopped by her sister’s words once again.
“I think you should call Dr. Tomlin.”
That made her pause.
Frowning, Reanna turned to look back at her sister. “What?”
Tamara lifted her head slightly as she crossed her arms over her chest. “I said, I think you should call Dr. Tomlin, Reanna. It’s obvious that you’re being reckless again …”
&
nbsp; Reanna’s brows rose. “Again?” She shook her head. “What the hell does that mean?”
Tamara’s jaw ticked as she shrugged slightly. “It means that I think you need to talk to your psychiatrist before you make anymore rash decisions. You’re acting weird, and taking huge steps before you’re ready.”
“I don’t need anyone to run options by before I make a decision, Tamara. I’m not a mental patient.”
“But you are a depressive; you have PTSD—”
“And I go to two sessions every week, and take my medication daily to keep myself balanced.”
“I still think it’s best if you call Dr. Tomlin, Reanna. Look at how you’re acting.”
“I’m not acting any differently than I usually do.”
Tamara slammed her fist against the wall next to her. “You’re being reckless, Reanna!” she screamed. “You rush shit. You’re not capable of making a decision like this! The last time you did you almost got yourself killed …”
“Whoa! Hold up,” Ronaldo yelled, pointing to Tamara. “Okay, girl. You need to let it go now. That was below the belt ...”
But of course, Tamara was past the point of listening. The woman was on a roll, completely uncaring of who she knocked down in her path to get what she wanted.
“No, Ron!” she persisted. “She’s being a bitch about this when all I’m trying to do is protect her! Dr. Tomlin can help her avoid doing what she did the last time she didn’t take the time to get to know the man she vowed to spend the rest of her life with.”
“Dammit! I mean it, Tamara. Shut the fuck up, you’re going too far.”
“Ron, we need to help her! She’s getting married after three days and I’m just supposed to sit here and watch her make another stupid fucking decision—”
“Stop it!”
Reanna screamed the words, only because she desperately needed her sister to stop freaking talking. The voices in her head were in a frenzy, screaming for her to disappear back into herself—put up the walls that held her back for so many years, just so she could hide her emotion and guard her heart. However, she refused to give in to them, refused to cry.
Dangerous Beauty: Part Four: Beautifully Broken Page 35