Amy Admires an Amish Man

by Linda K. Hubalek

  “What’s your message, Miss Sanders?”

  “Thank you for your letter. Will contact family. Amy Sanders.”

  Amy waited for the agent to figure the price and she withdrew the coins from her reticule. When the transaction was done, Amy walked back to Eli, noting the questioning look on his face. He was wondering what message she sent.

  Eli helped her into the wagon, not saying a word as they traveled out of town. Amy stayed silent because her emotions kept tearing her eyes. Kaitlyn was right. She needed time to herself, planting irises, and maybe throwing some dirt clods too.

  She desperately wanted to go home to see everyone, but at the same time…

  Amy watched a couple of jackrabbits in the distance, their heads appearing one second, then disappearing the next as they jumped through the tall grass.

  She’d seen the same action in Texas, only through a shorter variety of grass. Some things were so similar between the Kansas and Texas prairie, and other things—no—the people were so different.

  Could her family learn to laugh and enjoy life like the Hamner’s? The Swedish family had hardships and problems dating back to their hard life in Sweden, but they faced their trouble together and seemed like a solid family unit.

  Her family had always been fragmented, trying to fend for themselves and stay out of their father’s way. Their mother never stood up for them either, even though her children tried to protect her as they grew older.

  “I’ll drop you off at the house to talk to Cora, and unload the flowers by the house,” Eli said to break the silence.

  “Oh, thank you. I’ll plant the flowers later this afternoon.”

  “Don’t bother. I can dig holes and plant them myself,” was Eli’s terse reply.

  Amy’s temper was building, and she finally blew up at the infuriating man, punching him in the shoulder.

  “I work here, Eli, whether you like it or not. I’ll plant the flowers!”

  Eli’s shocked face made her punch him again.

  “What do you expect, Eli? I received bad news today, and you’re firing me!”

  “Cora hired you, not me. But you can return home, as you should.”

  “Maybe you should go home to Pennsylvania too,” Amy countered.

  “No reason to return there. This is home now,” Eli waved a hand to indicate the homestead land surrounding them.

  “But I can’t consider the ranch and Hamner family mine, huh? You had exclusive rights?”

  “Amy…no, I didn’t mean it like that,” Eli shook his head when he stopped in front of the rock house.

  Amy quickly jumped down from the wagon before Eli could step down to help her and stomped up the porch without looking back. If she didn’t love the man…

  Yes, that was the problem. Amy loved Eli and didn’t want to leave him. But Eli was making it clear he didn’t feel that way about her.

  Fine. She’d go back to Texas and rebuild her life.

  Amy stopped a moment to calm herself before opening the porch screen door and finding Cora. Upsetting the twins would not help her day, or Cora’s.

  Chapter 14

  “You should be wearing black, Amy. Have you no respect? Your father died,” Amy’s mother told her as she walked into the run-down ranch house.

  After traveling on the train for days, and being away from home for over a year, that was her mother’s greeting?

  Come to think of it, Amy had probably gotten more hugs from people as they bid her goodbye at the Clear Creek depot platform than she ever had from her own mother.

  “I came as soon as I could after I received word, Mama. I’m sorry for your loss.” It was her mother’s loss, but not Amy’s. She had four days to think about her father’s death, and what it meant to her. Freedom from his abuse, physical and verbally, resounded in her mind.

  And she’d never let another person treat her like that again. Her time with the Hamner’s and their friends showed her what family life should be like. Not how her parents treated her and her siblings.

  Amy continued to walk through the living area with her carpet bag. It didn't take many steps to put her bag by the loft ladder where she'd slept for years.

  Amy couldn't help comparing the small, sparse quarters upstairs with the bedroom she used at the Hamner's. She'd miss the soft mattress and down feather pillows of that bed tonight.

  "Oh, Amy, it's so good to see you! I’m so glad you’re home. It’s been horrible—" Ruth rushed out of the kitchen, crying, to embrace her, unlike her mother’s welcome.

  “I can imagine what you've been through, but it’s over now,” Amy consoled her sister after they silently clung to each other for several minutes. She hated that her sister had to shoot their father, but it was done, and they had to heal from the act. It was clearly in self-defense, knowing how her father treated them.

  Ruth pulled back and nodded her head toward their mother, indicating she needed to talk to the older woman. The woman had sat down in her father's rocker. At least she was using it now. In the past, no one dared sit in it.

  Amy pulled one of the two chairs up to the rocker and took her mother's hand.

  “I've missed you since I had to leave the ranch."

  "Why did you leave, anyway? You just disappeared one day without a word to your papa and me," the older woman accused her.

  Amy was taken back. "You know I was at the saloon in Austin. Papa traded me for his liquor bill!"

  "No, he wouldn't do that," her mother insisted.

  Amy gawked at her mother, and then at Ruth standing behind the rocker.

  "Ruth, didn't you read my letters to her when I was writing to you from Austin?"

  Ruth looked at the floor a long moment before meeting Amy's stare.

  "Let's go outside to talk," Ruth said, pulling Amy out the door before she could protest.

  "Why doesn't Mother know where I was?" Amy asked as soon as they were out of hearing range.

  "Either she can't remember or refuses to think Papa could have done that to you. Sometimes I wonder if Papa's hits to her head affected her thinking," Ruth rubbed her temple while she continued walking across the ranch yard.

  "How long has she acted like this?"

  "Mostly since he hit her last month. She lost consciousness with that punch. That's why when he went after her again..." Ruth trailed off, tears glistened with the bad memory.

  "Thank you for defending her, Ruth. We're all the better off for your standing up to him," Amy said as she hugged her sister.

  "And I didn't just shoot him once. I fired off the gun until it was empty," Ruth vehemently cried. "He deserved every bullet!"

  This was why Amy decided she needed to come back to Texas. Not for her mother, but for her sister. Amy opened her arms and Ruth fell against her chest, sobbing her heart's pain out.

  "Yes, he did. You were so brave, so strong for Mama," Amy whispered in a soothing voice as she rubbed slow circles on her sister's back.

  They stood in the middle of the yard for minutes as Ruth relived the pain of what she was forced to do.

  “When I rode into the marshal’s office to tell him what I’d done, I expected to be thrown in jail,” Ruth whispered.

  Amy squeezed Ruth’s shoulders, and Ruth told the rest of her story.

  “But I told him about Papa beating Mama whenever he was drunk, and the marshal declared right then that the shooting was self-defense, and I wouldn’t be charged. The marshal and undertaker followed me back out to the ranch and took the body away.”

  “Were many people at the funeral? Papa seemed to have more enemies than friends,” Amy asked to change the subject.

  “Just us, Mr. Ferguson, and a few other curious folks.”

  "What else has happened since the funeral? I would bet he had some outstanding debts," Amy asked as they walked arm in arm out toward the pasture.

  "The banker followed us home, anxious to see the shape of the place. The ranch was mortgaged, and the banker knew we couldn't pay it off. We have to leave by
the end of the month."

  "Cattle, horses? Did the banker take them too?" Amy asked then held her breath for Ruth's answer.

  "No. I think he felt sorry for us, knowing we were in dire straits. Billy Slater rounded up the few head of cows we had left and sold them for us. That paid off the accounts at the stores and gave us a little money left over."

  "Was Billy still working here?"

  "No, he left soon after you did, mad at how Papa treated you. He works for the Ferguson Ranch now and doing good."

  Why was Ruth's face flushing?

  "Uh...after Papa's funeral, Billy asked if he could marry me. I said yes, even though Mama said we need to wait to marry until after the mourning period, but we’re not going to wait a month, let alone a year."

  Amy let out a long breath, a little peeved that Billy kissed her first, but didn't stand up to her father. But she didn't have any feelings for Billy, compared to what she’d felt with Eli.

  "Well, I brought a dress home for you, so you’ll have a new dress for your wedding. And it's not black either," Amy added with a grin.

  "Good. I can't stand black. I hated I had to dye my only extra dress the color. The man doesn't deserve to be mourned."

  Ruth stepped back to study Amy’s dress, noting the quality of the deep blue silk of the skirt and the lace trim.

  "You have on a lovely dress, Amy, even if it's not the proper color,” Ruth said as she pulled a hankie from her pocket and blew her nose.

  "Where did you get such an expensive dress? Mr. Ferguson said you were in Kansas. Doing what?" Ruth said with a hint of concern.

  "Helping a woman with her newborn twins. She gave me this dress, and yours, among other things."

  "Where will you live?" Amy asked to get back to Ruth’s problems. She wanted her sister to have a decent life after their miserable childhood.

  "Mr. Ferguson has family quarters, and Billy has put in his name for one that's available. Since you're here, we'll go ahead and get married," Ruth beamed with love in her eyes.

  Actually, life on the Ferguson Ranch with Billy would be a stable home for her sister. The Hamners told of living on that very ranch for years and spoke highly of the Ferguson family.

  "What about Amos? Mr. Ferguson wrote that he showed up at the funeral. Where has he been for the past months?"

  "Oh, my, how Amos has grown. He was a foot taller than six months ago," Ruth went on, apparently sidetracked by the changes in their brother.

  "Turns out Amos has been working for the Ferguson's too, although Billy was sworn to secrecy not to tell anyone, for fear Papa would find out and come get him."

  Amy thought back to her talk with Mr. Ferguson at the Austin Post Office when she suggested Amos could take care of the bulls on the trip to Kansas. Her brother was already at the man's ranch! But the rancher hinted Amy could impersonate her brother, just to help escape her situation. The Sanders siblings owed the man for the improvement of their lives.

  "What about Mama? Does she comprehend she has to leave her home?"

  She was only in her fifties and used to hard physical work, but her mind seemed confused. Could she cook and clean for a family? Amy hated to think of the Ferguson's taking on another member of her family, but then she'd be close to Ruth and Amos.

  "Right after the funeral, Mama said she wanted to go home, and she kept repeating that even after we were back here. After a few days, I realized she meant back to San Antonio."

  "Does she still have family there? She's never talked about it while we were growing up."

  "I sent telegrams to the siblings she mentioned, not knowing if they were alive or still lived in the area. Turns out Mama has two brothers and a sister living in town.

  "Mama’s sister, Delia, answered back the next day, glad to hear about their long lost sister, and to look for a letter with more details."

  Amy said as she shook her head. Poppa had controlled Mama, and their children, until the day he died.

  "They had to have left San Antonio before I was born, over twenty-five years ago. Why didn't Mama ever send a letter to one of them during that time?"

  "Delia wrote they never heard from Mama after she married Papa. She was surprised she was still alive and living in Texas."

  "Did Delia mention Mama visiting, or living with them? And would Mama want to do that?"

  "Mama brings it up two, three times a day now that we heard from Delia. 'I wanna go home. My big sister will take care of me.'"

  They continued to walk through the overgrown pasture, void of cattle and their sounds. Only the quiet breeze moved the wisps of tall grass now.

  Amy wondered who the bank would sell the place to. It was small in acreage compared to most ranches in the area, and most of the buildings needed to be torn down, they were in that bad of shape.

  Probably one of the ranches that bordered this one would buy it to add to their acreage. Papa always griped about the neighbors. Amy was sure they there relieved he was gone now.

  They turned around, knowing they had to return to the house and their mother’s questioning.

  “I assume you’re just here for a visit, Amy? Or did you quit your job in Kansas?”

  When Amy left Clear Creek, her only goal was to reconnect with her family. Cora asked her to return to the Bar E if she didn’t decide to stay in Texas.

  But how could she go back when Eli made it clear he didn’t want her in his life? The man didn’t even see her off at the train depot.

  Eli thinks I left him, just as Rebecca did. But it wasn’t the same situation. Amy wasn’t choosing a different man, but reconnecting with her family.

  “I can go back to my employment, but I need to spend time here first. I want to witness your wedding and then travel with Mama to San Antonio afterward. We have family we’ve never met.”

  “True,” Ruth added, looking thoughtful. “I’d like to go with you, but the cost prohibits it.”

  “The Hamners generously gave me funds so I can pay for our train tickets both ways,” Amy assured her.

  “How about we both travel with Mama to be sure she’s settled in, and then come back for the wedding?”

  “Don’t you want Mama at your wedding?”

  Ruth looked around a long moment before meeting Amy’s eyes.

  “No, actually. With Mama’s state of mind, she’s picked up saying Papa’s belittling and mean remarks to me. I know she doesn’t truly mean it, but…”

  “I understand you want a fresh start with Billy. Let’s leave tomorrow for San Antonio. There’s no use staying here with the bad memories. It might help Mama to get her out of this house too.”

  “I’m ready to walk out this door and never come back,” Ruth stated as she straightened her shoulders.

  Amy gave her sister a one-armed hug. “Me too.”

  She’d have to endure one more night in this house, but then the past was truly behind her. Her future was back in Kansas, with Eli, if she had her wish.

  Chapter 15

  "Just in case you're interested," Dagmar looked Eli's way as they rode out to check the herd, "Cora picked up a letter from Amy when she was in town yesterday."

  Eli drew in a deep breath of the early morning air to calm his fluttering stomach. As much as he wanted to not think of Amy, she was always on his mind.

  After Dagmar didn't say anything else, Eli was forced to turn his way.

  Dagmar's grin was wide and all knowing.

  "You want to hear what Amy had to say, don't you, Eli," Dagmar chuckled.

  "Amy was a former, fellow employee and I only hope all is going well for her in Texas," Eli said, trying not to bite his tongue as he ground out the words.

  "Former employee? Now, where'd you get that idea? If you'd have been at the depot with us when Amy left, you would have heard Amy promise Cora she'd be back after visiting her family."

  Eli's shoulders relaxed just a smidgen until he thought about the man who had kissed Amy before she was thrown off the ranch.

  "I bet Amy's letter s
aid she changed her mind about staying in Texas, marrying the man who was interested in her before she had to leave home."

  "Well, you won part of that bet."

  Eli's heart sank to the bottom of his stomach. Amy wasn’t coming back to Kansas.

  "Just as well face it you're in love with the woman, Eli. You wear your emotions like a patch on your shirt right over your heart."

  "Doesn't do any good if she's staying in Texas," Eli admitted. So much for holding out hope he could ask Amy to marry him now.

  "Amy wrote a long letter, explaining what had been going on the past two weeks. After the father's funeral, the bank foreclosed on their ranch."

  "I'm sorry to hear that."

  "Don't think Amy was fond of the place, due to the circumstances. Amy, her sister, and mother left for San Antonio the day after Amy's arrival, not planning to return to the home place anyway."

  "San Antonio?" That was even further away from Kansas.

  "Turns out that's where Mrs. Sanders was from originally. Amy and Ruth are staying to visit their relatives for a while, but then their mother will stay to live with her older sister."

  "Just visiting for a while?" Eli questioned Dagmar's remark.

  "Yep. Then the girls are going back to the Ferguson Ranch for the wedding."

  Eli looked sideways at Dagmar but didn't say a word although Eli knew Dagmar was waiting for a comment.

  Now instead of thinking of kissing Amy, Eli envisioned her kissing a man at the end of their wedding ceremony.

  "Ruth, Amy's sister, is marrying one of the Ferguson Ranch hands. Their brother, Amos, is working and living there too."

  "So, Amy is staying there with her siblings," Eli finished the news for Dagmar.

  "No, Amy will be back on the Bar E after the wedding."

  Eli twisted around in his saddle so fast, his horse pranced sideways.

  "You're not joking, are you, Dagmar? I can't take it if you're joking about Amy," Eli warned his boss.

  "You better get your house done, Eli. You've let the project slide since Amy left."

  He had left the interior unfinished, living among the sawdust and cut boards, not caring if it was ever completed.