by Dee Williams
As she was moving towards the vicarage alone, Janet decided that was probably the best place to have a word with her. She left the car.
‘Excuse me.’
The vicar’s wife turned round. ‘Yes.’
‘I don’t suppose you recognize me, I’m Janet Slater, Mrs Slater’s daughter.’
The woman straightened her back. ‘Yes, I do remember you. You came here last year in the summer. And I seem to remember you upset Irene. Well, what do you want?’
‘I understand my mother is in a home.’
‘Yes, she is. Who told you?’
‘That doesn’t matter.’
‘What do you want her for?’
‘I would like her to see her great-granddaughter.’
‘I see.’
‘Could you tell me where she is, please?’
‘She is very poorly.’
‘I would like to see her.’
‘She isn’t dying.’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘In case you thought you were going to inherit her savings, I have to tell you she isn’t dying.’
Janet knew her mouth had dropped open. ‘I beg your pardon. I came here to get an address, to go and see my mother, not to be accused of trying to get her money.’
‘I just thought I would make it clear to you.’
‘Well, you’ve certainly done that. So, could I have her address?’
‘She’s in the residential home the other side of the village. You can’t miss it; it’s the old manor house.’
‘I know where that is. Thank you.’ Janet turned to walk away.
The vicar’s wife put a hand on Janet’s arm. ‘I’m sorry if I sounded a little put out, but we’ve just had a problem with another parishioner whose son went abroad and now he’s back just to get his hands on his mother’s money. You see, we do have a duty to protect our elderly.’
‘Who would do a thing like that?’ asked Janet softly.
‘I couldn’t possibly tell you. It was told to me in strict confidence.’
Janet stood and looked at her in amazement. What sort of church woman was she that she was ready to pass on gossip to a virtual stranger? ‘I shouldn’t think I would know who you’re talking about anyway. It’s many years since I lived in this village.’
‘Yes, I know.’
Janet turned and walked away.
‘What was all that about?’ asked Paula.
Janet laughed. ‘She wasn’t going to tell me where my mother was as she thought I’d only come to take her money.’
‘What?’
‘It seems a man has come back from abroad and he’s only interested in his mother’s money and all the village are ganging up on him. She wouldn’t tell me who it was.’ Janet was keeping any thoughts as to his identity to herself.
‘How many men have left the village?’ asked Paula.
‘I don’t know.’
‘Do you think she was talking about Mark?’
‘Of course not,’ said Janet, surprised the same thought was running through both their minds.
‘Why did Mark go and see your mother?’
‘Please, Paula, stop trying to make something out of it. It can’t be Mark, his mother’s not in a home, we’ve just seen her and besides, she might be going to live in Canada, and from what I gathered he doesn’t have any money worries.’ Why had these fears come to her?
‘Is he the only child?’
‘Yes, she lost a little girl many years ago, she was only two, she drowned in the village pond.’
‘That must have been really awful.’
‘I don’t really know much about it, except that for years my parents forbade me to go anywhere near the pond.’
‘See, they did love you once.’
‘I suppose so.’
‘That poor woman. It must take a long while to get over something like that.’
‘For ever, I should think.’
‘Did you find out where your mother is?’
‘Yes, it’s just the other side of the village. Come on, let’s go and see what sort of reception we get there.’
Paula laughed. ‘D’you know, there’s more intrigue in this small village than in the whole of London.’
‘I shouldn’t think so. It’s just that everybody knows everybody else’s business, and if they can’t find it out, they make it up.’
They drove down the tree-lined drive to the manor house.
‘This looks very grand,’ said Paula.
‘It was once. It was owned by the local squire. They used to ride to hounds from here. I would come and watch them go off fox-hunting.’
‘That must have been quite a sight.’
‘Yes, it was. Then once a year they had the hunt ball. As the vicar’s daughter I would be asked to go. It was all very smart and proper - long frocks, the lot.’
‘Did you have all the young men fighting after you for a dance?’
‘No, they were all too frightened of the vicar.’
‘Didn’t you have any dances?’
‘Only with the old men and I reckon some of them would have been right dirty old men if they’d been given half a chance.’
Paula laughed. ‘See what I mean about these small villages?’
Janet parked the car then removed the bouquet of flowers she’d brought, from the boot, and handed them to Paula. She took Janie from the car and they walked to the front door.
The door was opened by a young woman and they told her who they had come to see.
‘You’d better come in. Rene’s in the lounge.’
‘Is there somewhere I can talk to my mother in private?’ asked Janet.
The young woman’s eyebrows lifted. ‘You’re Rene’s daughter? Rene Slater’s?’
Janet nodded.
‘She’s always said she’s all alone, didn’t have anyone after her husband, the vicar, died.’
‘I haven’t seen her in a while.’
‘You’d better come and have a word with Miss Baker first. She’s in charge here.’
Miss Baker was a formidable-looking woman in her late fifties, tall and slim, with glasses that made her dark eyes look big and round.
‘This lady says she’s Rene Slater’s daughter.’
‘I wasn’t aware she had any family. What is it about you people? You’re not the first to come here to see if your parent is dying,’ said Miss Baker.
Janet pulled herself up to her full height. ‘I can assure you I haven’t come just to see if she is dying.’
‘We had a young man and his wife come here and poor Mrs Coleman was in a bad state when they left.’
So that’s who the vicar’s wife had meant. Janet smiled to herself. She remembered Peter Coleman from school, he’d been a bully and she wasn’t surprised to hear he hadn’t changed. ‘I was told that my mother was in a home and I would like to speak to her in private, if you don’t mind,’ said Janet softly.
Janie began to whimper and Janet, who was holding her, patted her back and rocked her to and fro. ‘And to show her her great-granddaughter.’
‘I see. You do understand we have to be on our guard? We’re responsible for these old people, and some are very vulnerable and confused.’
‘I can understand that, but I can assure you that Mrs Slater is my mother.’
‘Sarah, as lunch has now finished you can take these visitors to the dining room, then go and get Rene.’
Janet squirmed at them calling her mother Rene. She had always been so proud of the name Irene Slater; somehow it had stature and now she was known as Rene.
Janet looked round the dining room. It was sparse but clean. Two large tables dominated the room, with a number of nonmatching chairs pushed under them. In the centre of the tables, which were laid for tea, were small vases with a few sorry-looking flowers in them.
The door opened and her mother stood there, leaning heavily on a stick. She had shrunk and looked frail, she was an old woman but to Janet, standing in front of her mother, the years just fell
away. She suddenly felt like a nervous little girl who had done wrong.
Sarah helped her mother to a chair.
‘Mother, this is Janie, your great-granddaughter.’ Janet bent down at show her Janie.
Irene Slater looked up at Janet with her faded blue eyes. On recognizing her daughter she straightened up and her face became angry.
‘What do you want?’
‘I don’t want anything. I thought as today is Paula’s birthday you might like to see her and my granddaughter.’
‘Where’s her husband?’ She waved her stick at Paula.
‘Is that important?’
‘It is to me.’
Paula smiled at her. ‘We’ve brought you some flowers.’
‘I don’t want flowers.’
Sarah moved forward and took them from Paula. ‘They’re very nice.’
‘Sarah, d’you mind if I sit down? I’ve got a bit of back trouble.’
Sarah shook her head. ‘No, go ahead.’
‘Mother, I can’t turn back the clock. We have to look to the future.’
‘And what kind of future do I have? You left me and your father, we didn’t leave you. You’ve always been a selfish girl, only thought of yourself.’ She looked up at Sarah. ‘She’s never been to see me in years.’
‘I wasn’t exactly welcomed last year.’
‘Well, what do you expect after I don’t know how many years? Go away and leave me alone. I’m happy here. They look after me so I don’t need you. And by the way, if you’re after my money you’re going to be unlucky. I’ve left it to the cats’ home.’
Paula laughed.
Janet turned and told her to shush.
Janet was beginning to get angry. ‘I don’t need your money.’
‘That’s what they all say. Take me back to the day room, Sarah.’
Sarah put down the flowers and took hold of her arm as she struggled to stand up. They shuffled from the room but not before Mrs Slater had pushed the flowers to one side with her stick.
Janet sat down. ‘I’m sorry, Paula. That wasn’t very successful, was it? And on your birthday as well.’
‘Don’t worry. It was my fault for insisting we came here, but I thought she might have been pleased to see us.’
‘Not my mother.’
‘At least you know where you stand now.’
Tears filled Janet’s eyes. ‘I hoped that after all this time she would have mellowed a bit.’
Paula put her arm round Janet’s shoulder. ‘She doesn’t know what she’s missing, does she?’
Janet shook her head.
Sarah came back into the room. ‘Miss Baker wants to see you.’
They followed Sarah and as they passed the day room Janet felt a great sense of guilt as she caught sight of little old ladies with shawls round their hunched shoulders sitting dozing in their high-backed chairs. This was her mother’s life now.
Miss Baker was looking out of the window when they entered. ‘Please, sit down. I don’t know what you expected from your mother.’
‘I just wanted her to see my family.’
‘Well, she wasn’t happy about it. Do you live far away?’
‘London. ’
‘I see. Would you mind if I took your address?’
‘No, you might need to contact me.’
‘I don’t think you should come to see your mother, at least not for a while. We’ll talk to her and perhaps in the future she may change her mind and ask to see you.’
Janet gave Miss Baker her address. ‘Is my mother well?’
‘Yes, apart from some arthritis.’
‘Did Mark Scott come to see my mother?’
Miss Baker’s head shot up. ‘Is that Mrs Scott’s son, who lives in Canada?’
‘Yes.’
‘He did come along with his mother once. Do you know him?’
‘Yes.’
‘A nice young man. Very pleasant. I understand Mrs Scott will soon be going to Canada to live. Your mother will miss her, she often comes to see her.’
Janet guessed that over the years, possibly because they had both lost their husbands, they had settled any differences they might have had, so why wouldn’t her mother forgive her? ‘Thank you,’ said Janet. ‘And if you feel you’d like to get in touch with me you have my address.’ Janet looked at her fingers. ‘You will let me know if anything ...’ She couldn’t say the word.
Miss Baker smiled. ‘Of course, my dear.’
Janet and Paula left the house, with its smell of disinfectant, and walked out into the warm spring sunshine.
They sat in the car and Janet looked at the house.
‘Are you all right?’
Janet nodded. ‘You’re right. She really doesn’t know what she’s missing.’
Chapter 30
The page of Janet’s reception appointment book announced the day to be Monday 31 March.
‘I wonder what today will bring,’ she said to Mary, the young girl who shared the desk with her.
‘Same as always, I should think. Mums-to-be will be waddling in, and those that bring their kids will have ’em running all over the place with the other mums yelling and shouting at them to be quiet.’
Janet laughed. ‘That sounds about right.’
‘Did you see your daughter over the weekend?’
‘No. I don’t like to keep going round there, in case I seem like an interfering old mother.’
‘I’m sure she doesn’t think that. Her baby’s lovely and she’s getting on a treat.’
Janet smiled. ‘Yes, she is, and she’s getting quite a weight.’
‘When you think what a tiny little thing she was.’
‘Yes.’
‘And Paula’s looking well,’ said Mary, gathering up the files.
‘I am worried about her back. It’s giving her a lot of pain and for a couple of weeks now she’s been off colour and a bit tetchy. D’you know, she even gave Sue a telling off for something ever so trivial, which is not like her.’
‘I can’t imagine Paula being like that.’
‘She’s been complaining that she’s putting on a bit of weight.’
‘Aren’t we all?’
‘It was her stomach she was going on about.’
‘But she got her figure back very quick.’
‘Yes, but you can see now she’s having trouble fastening her skirts and trousers.’
‘Is she going back to work?’
‘Not yet. I don’t really want her to, but she says she may have to. She’s put her flat on the market and she is looking at a smaller house. That way she’ll have a few thousand to live on, but it won’t last for ever.’
‘The father doesn’t help, then?’
‘No. She doesn’t want him to.’
‘When’s she looking at the house?’
‘Today. She’s going with Sue.’
‘Where is it?’
‘Just up the road from Sue. Streatham way.’
‘It’s nice round there.’
‘Yes, and it’s not too far from me.’
The morning proceeded without any great traumas and it was lunch time when the phone rang.
Mary handed Janet the receiver. ‘It’s for you. It’s Sue.’
‘Hello, Sue, everything all right?’ Janet was on her guard. Sue never phoned her at work, but nonetheless she was taken back when Sue told her Paula wasn’t feeling very well and that she had called the doctor.
‘What’s wrong?’ she asked, trying to hide the panic in her voice.
‘I don’t know. When I came round this morning she didn’t want to go out. She keeps being sick and she looks terrible. We’re waiting for her doctor. It seems she’s been very sick all over the weekend.’
‘Why didn’t she call me?’
‘You know Paula, she likes to be independent.’
‘Yes, but that’s all very well if you’re feeling all right.’
They discussed what they thought could be the matter and finally Janet said, ‘As so
on as I finish I’ll be round.’
‘I’ll stay with her till then.’
‘Thanks.’ Janet put the phone down.
Mary looked concerned. ‘What is it?’
‘I don’t know. Paula’s not feeling too good. I’m very worried.’
As soon as she could Janet left the hospital and rushed over to Paula’s. Sue was still there and when she opened the door Janet could see Sue had been crying.
‘What is it? Has the doctor been?’
Sue nodded. ‘Come into the kitchen.’
Janet followed her.
‘Sit down.’
Janet did as she was told.
‘She may have to go back into hospital.’
Janet leapt to her feet. ‘Why?’
Sue took hold of Janet’s hand. ‘First she’s got to have some tests.’
‘Why?’
‘The doctor thinks it might be jaundice.’
‘Well, that’s not too bad.’
‘Or,’ Sue hesitated, ‘she said secondary cancer can’t be ruled out.’
Janet felt her legs crumble. The room was swaying. She held on to the worktop. She wanted to be sick. She tried to let the words sink in. She wanted to scream out, No! No! It can’t be true! Not my baby. Not my daughter. ‘But she had the all-clear just a short while ago.’
‘I know.’
‘The doctor must be wrong.’
‘Let’s hope so.’
‘Janie. What will happen to Janie?’ she gasped.
‘Don’t worry. We’ll make sure everything is taken care of. You go and see Paula. The doctor managed to get her in to see the specialist tomorrow.’
‘What can I say? Oh Sue, what has she done to deserve this?’
Sue had tears running down her cheeks. ‘If only we knew.’
‘Where is she?’
‘Upstairs. Lying down.’
When Janet walked into the darkened room she could see Paula was lying on top of the bed. Janet’s movement made her look round.
‘Jan. Oh Jan, what am I going to do?’
Janet sat on the bed. Paula sat up and put her arms round her. ‘I don’t want to die.’
Janet held her close. ‘You’re not going to die. You have too much to live for.’
‘The doctor said—’
‘Shh. You’ve got to have some tests, so don’t let’s start being defeatist.’
‘When I go for the tests tomorrow, will you come with me?’