Lacing Shadows

by Tina Smith

  He was studying the menu with a crinkle between his eyes which made me want to reach out to rub the wrinkle away. He’d left his hood down, which surprised me considering he wouldn’t take it off in my apartment until I tried to do it. I’d noticed the stares we got when we entered the diner, but I refused to acknowledge them and hoped he did so, too. Sitting here with him, I was feeling ecstatic.

  Here was someone who was probably as damaged as one got. I knew I would have to suppress the caretaker in me. I always got hurt because I couldn’t let others suffer. I just couldn’t sit back and watch their pain without doing anything about it. Of course, this was the bane of all my romantic relationships. Most men didn’t want a strong woman to take care of them and immediately felt threatened. I wondered if Matthias felt that way when a woman tried to be there for him. I hoped he wouldn’t run away as fast as he could in the opposite direction in a millisecond when he discovered what kind of person I was.

  It was my downfall, this bleeding heart.

  “What are you getting?” I asked.

  He peered over the laminated menu and I swore I could see an amused twinkle in those hazel eyes. Well, they were a multitude of colors, which I found fascinating and I didn’t even want to look away.

  “I guess I’ll have a cheeseburger with the works. I haven’t eaten much all day.”

  “Are you trying to starve yourself?”

  He looked confused. “Um…no. I just didn’t think about it until now.” A faint grumbling sound emanated from his stomach and made him shift uncomfortably in his seat. “I guess I just don’t notice the hunger until I smell food.”

  “Are you one of those types who dives into your work and forgets to eat, right?” I winked and turned toward the waitress who lifted an eyebrow as if to ask if we were ready. I nodded and she headed our way. “I’m one of those too. I can go a whole day at work reorganizing shelves and cleaning to make it more appealing for customers at the dinner and forget to take my lunch break.”

  The waitress arrived to take our order and Matthias added a vanilla milkshake to his burger order. I liked to see he enjoyed small things, like a malt drink. People who didn’t like sweet things were boring in my book.

  “So you like working at the diner?” He asked. I wondered if he genuinely wanted to know if I liked it there or was just making small talk to fill the void with mindless chit chat.

  “Yeah, it’s always nice being surrounded by loud patrons and crazy teenagers.” I played with my spoon as we waited for our drinks. “The tips are good though, so I deal with it. It’s a lot like this diner.” He was watching me attentively and I felt my cheeks burn under his scrutiny. “When I get down time, they let me read in one of the booths. I love to read. It’s the only time I feel normal, with a story floating in my head.”

  He nodded and gave me a sheepish grin. It lit up his face and I liked how it made him look…happy. “I like reading too. It’s definitely a great escape.”

  “You do?” I sat up in surprise. Honestly, guys who read were a rare thing. “What’s your favorite book?”

  It was his turn to squirm. “Uh, well. I guess I like the classics. Robinson Crusoe, Huckleberry Fin, The Odyssey, David Copperfield. Stuff like that. Epic stories hold my attention more than the lighter stuff that seems to be popular now.”

  Our drinks arrived and he tore off the wrapper of his straw before he dipped it into his shake and took in a mouthful. Every move he made kept me in a trance, and I forced myself to look away to take a sip of my soda.

  “Classics are good. I liked Jane Erye. That one was really interesting.”

  “I haven’t read that one.”

  “Oh, you probably wouldn’t like it, being a guy and all.”

  He lifted an eyebrow as he continued to sip on his shake. “I take it you’re majoring in Library Science or English?”

  I shrugged. “I chose English, but I don’t want to teach. Guess I’m undecided what I want to do. What about you?” I craned my head to the side, studying a drop of milkshake spotting his perfect chin. His scars were almost invisible to me. I could see the perfect bone structure under his skin and I bet if the scars were not there, he could pass for a GQ model. Especially with eyes like his.

  “I’m majoring in electrical engineering. Doing the basics right now, but eventually I’ll get there.” He wiped the spot of milkshake off with a napkin and sat back, looking right back at me. I’m saved from my nervousness when our food arrived a few moments later, steaming hot and looking drool worthy. I dove into my fries before realizing they were right out of the fryer and ended up burning my tongue on one.

  “So what’s your back story? You said you’d tell me.” I talked with my mouthful, noticing too late what I was doing, but at least I kept from flashing him a mouthful of chewed-on food. He didn’t seem bothered by it, and I like him even more for it.

  “Yes, I guess I did say I would tell you.” He took a bite of the burger he’d smothered with ketchup and mustard. So much so, it was dripping out the sides. I watched as he attempted to keep the plopping mess of it from landing in his lap.

  He finished chewing and let out a sigh. “Have you ever read Frankenstein?”

  I crinkled my nose in thought. “By Mary Shelley, right?”

  He nodded and took a sip of the water he’d just received from the waitress. “Well, what if I told you the legend isn’t necessarily a just a story, but was made real?”

  My eyes widened and I almost choked on a fry. “What do you mean?”

  He waited as I cleared my throat and offered me some of his water. I inhaled the glass and could finally breathe again.

  “You alright?”

  I nodded. “Go on.”

  “Okay, well. The story is what it is…a story. But, there had been others who have tried to duplicate the story in real life.” He waved his hand over his outfit like he was introducing himself. “Well, I’m the result of that.”

  I stared at him. My appetite wavered. “You mean, you’re like Frankenstein?”

  He shook his head. “See? I said you wouldn’t believe me. You haven’t read it, have you?”

  “Read what?”

  “The story.”

  “Oh,” I slumped in my seat and wondered what he was getting at. I reminded myself that I wanted to know and that acting like I didn’t believe him would be fatal to find out more about him. I sat back up and gave him the most interested face I could manage. “Okay, so I haven’t. I just saw the movie so long ago, I can’t even remember it, honestly.”

  At this he relaxed. “That’s okay. Frankenstein is the scientist who created the monster out of dead parts of others and reanimated it. He never gave him, the creature, a name.”

  “Oh, that’s weird. Why not?”

  He shrugged, looking pensive. “I guess he just didn’t see him as alive. It repulsed him.”

  “Are you alive?”

  He flicked his eyes from mine back down to the table. “I believe so.”

  “You seem pretty alive to me.” I reached out and touched his hand, where he laid it out by his shake. It was cold, like he’d been holding onto the cup for a while. It prompted me to peer down and study his fingers. They were a deep pink. In fact, almost too pink from the coldness of the shake. Though his skin was rough and there were scars circling his wrists and down the top of his hand, he didn’t appear dead.

  He watched me studying them before pulling away.

  “I feel alive. I guess it’s strange to think I was made from dead things.” He looked morose, like he was about to shut down again, and possibly run. I struggled to think up a way to prevent it. I wanted him to stay longer, for a long time.

  “But, you are alive.” I missed the touch of his skin and I wanted to slide over to hug him. He looked like a lost soul who could use some sort of interaction. “How long have you been alone?”

  He seemed stunned, as though I’d read his mind. Maybe I had. I always did have a funny way of knowing how people felt. He was no different, s
o he had to be as alive as I was. As anyone eating in this diner right now.

  “Why would you ask me that?”

  “You’ve been alone a long time, right? How long ago were you made?”

  He contemplated what he was going to say to me, and I could see the conflict flash in his eyes. I hoped he would tell me. I didn’t want him to stop talking, but it was like pulling teeth to get any words out of him.

  He peered around before clasping his hands together, leaning on them with his elbows on the table. “I’ve been alive for over a century and a half. I’ve seen all the world wars and then some. I didn’t even have a name until I was thirty years old.”

  “Who gave you your name?”

  He frowned, his face took on a darkened look as his thoughts tumbled into the past. “A woman named Cassiopeia.”

  His reaction told me so many unsaid things and I scooted over, laying my hand on his arm.

  “Was she your wife?”

  His face looked slightly surprised at my nearness, but he didn’t pull away. Instead he slowly turned to look me in the eyes. There was pain there, a great suffering. I hoped I hadn’t caused it, and I only wanted to wipe it away and make him smile again.

  “She died.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  He looked away and pushed his plate away. He was done eating. So was I.

  “People die.”

  “You’re immortal.”

  “Yes,” He was shutting down again so I reached out to rub his arm and distract him.

  “I’m sorry. Look,” I pushed my hair out of my face and dropped my hand back down onto his. “Let’s go back to my place, or yours since you live so close. Which is really cool. I know you don’t want to talk about it, but you should. Let it out. I won’t judge. I swear.” Tracing the scars, I found this somewhat comforting, but he tensed up and looked like he wanted to run away. That was when I retreated and placed my hands in my lap. Maybe he was beyond reaching. I hoped not. I wanted to talk to him more, badly. It felt like a need that couldn’t be sated and it made me wonder why.

  I picked at my nails, chipping off the old polish flake by flake. I had to do something. Anything to keep from sounding desperate.

  I risked a peek up at Matthias and found the spark of amusement back in his eyes.

  “I know you won’t judge me.” He motioned to the rest of the diners. “But they all do. No one can look at me and not think horrid things. There’s no escaping it and nowhere in the world where I can live without being scrutinized for these.” He pointed to the scars on his face, letting his finger slide down his cheek.

  Even from across the way, a group of young girls were whispering and giggling, staring at him. I felt my rage grow and I wanted to hop out of the booth to rush and scream at them for being so insensitive. How dare they?

  “Ignore them. From what I can tell, they know nothing about you.”

  He jerked, looking uncomfortable. I wondered if I said something off or the unwanted attention was too much for him.

  “Here’s your check. Anything else I can get you?” The waitress dropped off the check in front of him and he reached for his wallet.

  “No thank you.” I held out my hand to him. “I can pay my part.”

  He shook his head and gave the waitress the check back with his money. “No, I got it.”

  “You don’t like ladies paying their way, do you?”

  “It’s not that at all.” He peered at me and smiled. It made my heart jump. “Money is nothing to me. You need it more than I do.”

  I huffed and crossed my arms, not really sure what to think about that. “This is the feminist era you know.”

  He laughed and got to his feet before holding his hand out. “True. Come on. I think we have more to talk about, but not here.”

  I took his hand and studied him wondering if I’d lost my mind for falling for this guy so easily. It didn’t matter though, I was hooked. I had it bad and couldn’t run, even if I tried.

  Chapter 5. Matthias

  Holding Ruby’s hand felt good, natural, and exhilarating. I wanted to rub my thumb across the top of her hands, but didn’t want to seem presumptuous. We made it back to her apartment in no time and she suddenly let go of me to fish her keys out of her purse. I missed the touch of her skin on mine and it left me with a longing I’d not felt in half a century.

  As the lock jingled with the key, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I peered down the hall, but nothing’s there. I even walked over to the large plate glass window and peeked outside to observe the students walking past as if nothing was out of the normal. The sun sank over the trees and past the mountainside. The evening was morphing into night, cooling down rapidly. Night was when the nightmares come out, and most mortals didn’t even have a clue they existed.

  I did. I could feel their magic swirling in the air outside the glass as I pressed my hand against the cool surface. I closed my eyes and hoped it wasn’t yet time to fight again…to run. Not yet. It was too soon.

  My eyes flung open and I pressed my lips together. No. I won’t run anymore. I couldn’t. Not now that I knew Ruby existed in this treacherous world. Leaving without knowing her would be like ripping my heart to tiny, bitter strips of nothing. My life was empty. I’d let it become this way and hadn’t bothered to do anything worthy in so many years.

  It was time to do something about that.

  “Matthias?” Ruby’s voice broke into my thoughts and I pulled away from the window.

  “Yes?”

  Whatever was out there wasn’t attacking yet. Maybe it had no idea I was here. Either way, the time would come to face it, sooner or later.

  I took a deep breath and put on a smile for her. This reassured her enough and it was worth it to see her face light up. Made my entire day.

  “You’re perfect.”

  Did I just say that out loud?

  She laughed and reached out to take my hand, beckoning me to follow. We went into her apartment and locked the door behind us.

  “Do your scars hurt?” She plopped onto her bed and rolled onto her stomach, leaning on her hands.

  I shook my head. “No. They’re healed now. It’s been over a century.”

  “Oh,” Her eyes roamed freely as I waited. I feel awkward, out of place standing here even as she examined me more thoroughly. “You can take off your hoodie, you know. How can you not be dying of heat right now?” She flushed as she realized what she said. “Or not…whatever you want.”

  I let out a breath and unzipped the hoodie, slipping it off and tossing it on the nearby chair. I sat on it and leaned on my legs. I had a tank top underneath, but wished I’d worn a full shirt. I usually never took off my jacket when I was around others. Still, I tried to look comfortable when all I really wanted to do was head out and shut myself in my own studio apartment.

  Her continued examination of my visible scars made me fidget and I looked away. My arms were built, I’d always been in the best of shape. I never knew when I’d need the strength to fight in this crazy world. The thought of the dangers lurking outside made me flick my eyes to her window where a slow, calm breeze lifted the sheer inner curtains. She had black out ones on there too, but the light from the evening poured in. Or what was left of it. It was getting dark in there fast and I wondered if she even noticed with that dreamy look on her face.

  “Are they everywhere?” She asked. I briefly wondered if she meant the Others, but realized she was talking about my scars. My fingers dug into my knees as I waited for the inevitable. “Can I see them?” She sat up and dangled her legs over the edge of her bed. “I mean, if that’s okay. You don’t have to strip or anything.” She motioned with her hands for me to lift my shirt. “Just your chest.”

  Her earnest request and naïve curiosity made me relax. I nodded and stood up, lifting the tank up to my chest to show her the array of intricate scars. My creator had sewn me up from various male body parts to make one whole man. I’d never knew who I was a part of, but
that was inconsequential, for I felt I was only just me. No one else.

  She stood and came toward me, reaching out to touch my chest. Her skin burned as it reached mine and I stifled the urge to gasp from the spark of her touch. Why did her touch feel like it was pure energy? It zapped me, but I didn’t flinch. I just held my breath as her fingers slid over the hardened ropes of scar tissue. I felt each and every movement, the heat from her skin, and even the way she was looking at me. There was no fear, no disgust or shock. It was more like someone admiring a beautiful piece of art.

  Slowly, I inhaled. All of this bombarded my senses at once and I felt like falling over dizzy. She smelled amazing, like a combination of honeysuckle and orchids. I wanted to get closer, taste her skin as I kissed her neck and drew her into my arms. I could already taste her lips, sweet, warm and supple. Even her body, intoxicating as it would be to have her skin to skin with me and completely naked, overwhelmed me.

  I jolted when I realized I wasn’t just thinking those thoughts, I was actually holding her to me, kissing her pretty mouth, inhaling her additive scent and feeling the warmth radiating off her smooth skin in waves of desire. Stepping away, I was horrified to find my actions had slipped out of my control before I even knew it. Her eyes were still closed, at first, and she seemed drugged by this enchantment. As was I. But I made the mistake of continuing to step away from her, making her flip her eyelids wide open.

  “I—I’m so sorry. I…I didn’t know I was doing that…” I stuttered and backed away, feeling confused and afraid that I’d violated her space. “I didn’t mean to get too close, I…I…” Why couldn’t I talk?

  She looked stunned now and probably just as confused as I was. “It’s…okay. It was nice.”

  I paused, studying her closely for the truth. She looked dreamy, like she’d just had the best milkshake of her life.