Thirty-Three Going On Girlfriend (The Spinster Series Book 2)

by Becky Monson

  “Yes, a very smart person—smarter than she gives herself credit for, asked me that same question once.” A smile spreads across Jonathon’s face. I grin back, but then I think about how that advice was about Jared and my happiness fades. And now . . . now I wish I could go back to that time when Anna gave me that advice, to when things were new. The beginning of it all. Life was better with Jared, but it was the separation part that really messed things up.

  “Thank you, Julia,” Jonathon says. This time it’s him that touches my arm.

  “You’re welcome,” I say. “Now go back in there,” I jerk my head toward the restaurant, “and save my butt because if this wedding doesn’t happen I’m pretty sure it will be on my head.”

  “The wedding is back on, if Anna will have me,” he says. I notice this time when he smiles, it’s not as smug as it used to be.

  Sheesh, you think you know someone and then you get tipsy, ruin things, and then find out they aren’t what you thought they were. How very strange.

  The alcohol, and then subsequent drama with Anna and Jonathon that I single-handedly caused, had one positive note. Well, two actually. The first is that I no longer dislike Jonathon, which is a good thing, I think. The second is it helped me to not think about Jared. But now that it’s all over, the sadness rushes through me quickly. So quickly that tears instantly sting my eyes.

  Maybe some more champagne will help me get through the rest of this night? On second thought, I think I’d best not. Who knows what I’d do next?

  CHAPTER 25

  There’s a hole . . . in my sock.

  But also, there’s a hole in my heart. I feel a bit like crawling under a rock and coming out only when I feel better. Which, I’m pretty positive, will be never.

  Have I made a huge mistake? Even when I think of calling Jared and telling him that I was just kidding or had a moment of complete insanity, I just know it was best for things to end the way they did. It would have been worse if it happened later.

  My heart aches every time I think of how angrily he looked at me last night, which is why I’m trying desperately hard not to think of it. And even though I swore it off the last time, I Googled. I searched “How to stop thinking about someone” and read the first article that popped up. There was some very good advice that I won’t be using. It’s just too much work. Besides, I don’t want him to be out of my head. I just want the pain to go away. Something tells me it will be a while until that happens, if it ever does.

  The rest of the dinner was drama free and when I walked back into the dining room, Anna came over and gave me a big (albeit undeserved) hug, for talking some sense into Jonathon. Check me out, I’ve saved two weddings, first Brown’s, now Anna’s. I’m like the wedding whisperer. Sure, it was me who ruined Anna’s in the first place, but I think we should just focus on the fact that I fixed it.

  I made it through the rest of the night without a huge breakdown, which I think was a miracle. I just focused on Anna and tried to be the best maid of honor I could be, after being the absolute worst one. I even participated in the slumber party, although my bed, a box of cookies, and Charlie sounded so much more appealing.

  It’s been a long time since I was part of a slumber party with a bunch of women, but apparently, it’s still the norm to talk about boys and relationships. So that pretty much sucked. I avoided talking about me and luckily no one asked me anything about my love life. They probably just figured I was Anna’s sad older sister who has no future.

  I couldn’t sleep after everyone had snoozed off, so I got up and sneaked out. For some reason home seemed sad and lonely, so I went to my favorite place in the world, my sanctuary, the bakery. I figured I could work more on Anna’s cake, saving Patti and Debbie from having to do too much. Really, it was just something to get my mind off of Jared. I’ve realized, though, that weddings are not exactly the best way to get your mind off of love.

  Even though it’s a struggle, I make all of my thoughts about the cake. It’s turning out beautifully, I must say. I’ve even made a few gum paste flowers, though Patti has already made all of the ones we need. I just wanted to try it. I thought I was horrible, but either I’m not that bad, or the gods of gum paste were watching out for me because if the flowers had turned out horribly it might have been the straw that broke the camel’s back and I’d have completely lost it.

  A noise makes me jump, and I nearly knock an entire mixing bowl of icing off the counter. It was the bells jingling from the front door. In my depression coma, could I’ve forgotten to lock the front door? I’ve never forgotten before, but there have been a lot of firsts in my life recently.

  I must have forgotten because there are now sounds coming from the front of the bakery. Oh, gosh, this is not good. With so many freaky people downtown, this could be seriously bad. I hear more noises coming from the front. I can’t make out anything, but I can hear two muffled voices. A man and a woman, it sounds like. I pick up my phone as quietly as possible and get ready to dial 911. I slowly walk to the opposite side of the kitchen, trying carefully to not make a sound, and grab a large butcher knife. Thank goodness I’m in a bakery. There are a lot of items at my disposal to use as weapons.

  I carefully walk over to the door that separates the kitchen from the dining room and press my ear to the door. Whatever the intruders are searching for, I don’t think they are going to find it here. We have very little cash on hand, especially on Saturdays when the bakery is closed. Plus, any leftovers are donated to a local soup kitchen, so there are only ingredients to steal and, I suppose, expensive equipment. Maybe that’s what they’re after. Yes, perfect. I’ve lost my boyfriend and now I’ll lose my large KitchenAid. Could this weekend get any worse?

  It’s quiet. Maybe they’ve realized there was nothing for them and gone? I can hope.

  “Oh, George,” a woman says, or rather moans. Okay, so they didn’t leave. Crap.

  Wait, the woman’s voice sounded familiar.

  I push the door open ever-so-slightly and peek out. “Oh, Debbie,” I hear as the sight unfolds before me.

  George. Debbie. Slightly compromising position in my dining room. My dining room, where people eat.

  So many levels of gross.

  I quickly go back into the kitchen. They don’t know I’m here, which means if I don’t let them know that I’m here the situation could escalate to something that will probably scar my brain for life. I suppose I could go out the back door, but that is an emergency door that opens up into an alleyway that gives me the creeps. Plus, the door will sound a ridiculously loud alarm, giving me away completely. I think I need to signal them that I’m here. But how?

  Realizing, rather quickly, that I’m surrounded by things that make loud noises, I start banging kitchen items on the stainless steel table I’m working at. It’s too noisy for me to know if it scared them off. I’m not sure I’m willing to try listening for them again because I’m scared of what I might hear.

  I don’t think this is their first tryst in my bakery, by the looks of things. What if they made it to the back? To the kitchen? I glance around my kitchen. A horrific picture fills my mind. Oh, my poor stainless steel counters. I’ll never look at you the same.

  “Julia?” From the doorway, a very red-faced Debbie speaks loudly over the noise of the mixing bowl that I’m currently banging on the possibly despoiled stainless steel counter. “What are you doing here?”

  “Um, I’m uh, just working on Anna’s cake,” I say, not wanting to admit that I just saw what I saw. Maybe if I just don’t bring it up, neither will she.

  George. Debbie. Wait. George and Debbie. Oh, my gosh, George and Debbie! Even though they may possibly have defiled my bakery, I’m suddenly feeling so happy for my friend. She deserves happiness. I just hope George is the man for the job.

  “Oh, well that’s what I came in for, too,” she says easily. Too easily. Although, that might be the real reason she came in, she just decided to let George come with her so they could take advantage
of the dining area with no one around. And even though I’m so happy for her, that is still super gross.

  “Great,” I say a little too brightly, sounding fake. “I guess I will leave you to it, then,” I say as I take off my apron and quickly grab my purse. The longer I stay here, the more chance there will be for me to accidentally say something. Something needs to be said, but not right now. Not today.

  Oh, my gosh, the sock! And the hair clip! Now I know why she was acting so weird when I asked her about it. I can’t wait to tell Jared the reason behind the mysterious sock. Oh, wait. I can’t tell him. Maybe I can give him a little time and we can be friends? Maybe the sock story will give me a reason to talk to him?

  Gosh, I hope so.

  ~*~

  “You look so pretty, Anna,” I say and sniffle. I told her I wouldn’t tear up, but I didn’t get any sleep last night and so it’s going to happen. She’s just going to have to deal with it.

  “No crying, Julia,” she says as she checks herself out in the mirror. “I’ll end up crying with you and completely ruin my makeup.” She makes an “O” with her mouth and wipes the corners clean of any seeping lip-gloss.

  She looks more than pretty, stunning is more like it. But I can’t tell her that because it would tread too far into that after-school-special feeling we so try to avoid. My family is not the best at admitting our feelings about each other. We get embarrassed by it. Which might be why the words “I love you” could never just spill out of my mouth when I said it to Jared. That actually makes a lot of sense. I can’t believe that’s the first time I’ve thought of that.

  I’ve always coveted Anna’s brown, bouncy-curly hair, but today her hair goes way beyond coveting. More like full-blown hair envy. It’s been straightened and then curled, the loose ringlets cascading down her back. I hadn’t realized how long her hair really was.

  And then there is the dress. I’m not sure how she did it, but she obviously crawled into my mind and stole my dream dress. It’s exactly what I’d have wanted, simple, yet elegant. I want to hate her, but I’m just so darn proud of her, even if she’s marrying a guy she only dated for six months. I’m not going to think about that right now.

  I’m also not going to think about Jared, which is pretty much an impossibility. Of course I’m going to think about him. But I’m going to try to push the thoughts out because if I’m going to make it through this day, and I have to make it through this day, I can’t think about anything having to do with Jared.

  “Is Jared coming?” Anna asks as she primps more in the mirror.

  Well, that really doesn’t help my vow of not thinking about Jared. I guess it was coincidence that she stole my dream dress. Anna obviously cannot get into my mind. If she could, then she would know that just saying his name is like driving a hot, searing knife into my heart.

  “Um . . .” Deep breaths, Julia. Deep breaths. “No, sorry. He’s still sick,” I continue with the lie I started yesterday.

  “Oh. Too bad,” is all she says. What? No freaking out over the seating chart?

  “Sorry about your seating chart,” I say, and then mentally slap myself. Why would I even say that out loud? Am I trying to send her into a rage right before she’s to walk down the aisle?

  She waves it off with her hand. “Oh, Julia, it’s no big deal.” She gives me an eye roll, like I shouldn’t even be mentioning it.

  “Did you take a Valium?” I ask, actually concerned.

  “What? No!” She stares at me like I’m ridiculous.

  “Well, it’s just that you don’t seem to be reacting to things you would have normally reacted to.”

  “Julia, this is my wedding day. All of the other stuff, the planning and everything else? That suddenly becomes unimportant when the day is finally here. I just want to marry Jonathon. That’s all I care about. You’ll see when it’s your turn.” She pats me on the cheek in a patronizing way. It would have been patronizing, if it weren’t a joke we sometimes do—making fun of my mom’s sister, Aunt Louise, who always pats our cheeks as if we are still babies. She’s going to be here today. Lovely.

  “Oh, no,” I say, just realizing something.

  “What?” Anna says looking frantically at her dress as if I just spotted a stain on it.

  “I just realized that all of the relatives are going to be giving me the ‘your day will come’ lines all night. I don’t have a buffer!” I say, panic in my voice.

  “Oh, Julia.” She purses her lips briefly. “Who cares what they say. You have Jared now.”

  “Yeah,” I say sadly. But she doesn’t notice. And she shouldn’t notice. This day is about her, and I will not make it about me. When she gets back from her honeymoon, I can tell her everything and then when she tells me I did the right thing, I’ll feel so much better about it all. I can hold on until then. If only Brown were around, I could at least talk to her. But she’s still off honeymooning in Europe.

  There’s a knock on the door. “Are you ready?” my dad asks.

  Wedding number two, here we go.

  CHAPTER 26

  I made it down the aisle. I did it. I didn’t trip, I didn’t face-plant. I even kept with the rhythm of the music. With my mind so terribly full of things, it’s quite the incredible feat. Jonathon winked at me as I passed, and I beamed at him. I’m going to enjoy having him in the family, I think.

  Even though I knew he wouldn’t show up today, I had a little hope that when I got up to the front and turned around, I’d see Jared sitting there in the pews. It was a dumb, chick-flick girl-fantasy. I should probably stop watching chick flicks or reading romance or chick lit for a while. I need to be in the real world, I think.

  Anna is practically glowing as she walks down the aisle with my dad escorting her. No pale face, no stressful looks, just beautiful and happy. Even in my sad state, I can feel the joy radiating off of her. I feel something like pride well up in me, and it’s hard to keep my eyes from tearing. Then, of course, I make the mistake of glancing at my mother who has tears streaming down her face. That does not help matters at all.

  The look Jonathon has as he watches Anna walk down the aisle is, I dare say, quite adorable. He is sharp in his black tuxedo, with black tie and vest. He even looks handsome, I’ll admit. Now that I know he’s not actually as smug and pompous as I painted him to be, he seems that much more attractive. Still not even remotely my type, which is a good thing, after all, since he will be my brother-in-law in a matter of minutes.

  I listen as the officiant welcomes everyone and then gives a little talk about how Jonathon and Anna are each other’s happily ever afters. A wave of sadness rushes over me. I thought Jared would be my happily ever after, but now . . . now I’m not even sure I’ll have a happily ever after in my life. Nor am I sure I’d want it with anyone else but Jared. There is the incredibly small hope that he will move back and we might find each other again, but I doubt Jared will stay lonely long. Someone will dig her claws into him as soon as she can, probably that trampy Kirsten. I, on the other hand, may live a long life of solitude with cats. My life has come full circle.

  Anna and Jonathon say their vows and they are beautiful and heartfelt. Jonathon’s are not long and drawn-out like I had originally thought they’d be. In fact, most of his vows are clever, and he gets the congregation to giggle a couple of times, like when he vows to keep Anna’s wallet full of shopping money. He knows her well.

  With vows completed and rings exchanged, the officiant pronounces them husband and wife and tells Jonathon he “may now kiss the bride.” The kiss is sweet and not quite as PG-13 as Brown’s and Matt’s was. After the kiss, everyone cheers and they turn and walk down the aisle and out into the church lobby.

  I can’t believe it. My baby sister is married. It’s the end of an era. But I guess the beginning of a new one. New beginnings. I need to find one of those.

  ~*~

  “Oh, Julia dear,” Aunt Louise pats my cheek, patronizingly. “You’re so pretty. Why haven’t you been snatched up ye
t?”

  “Oh, well . . .” I trail off, not knowing what to say. I’ve thought of lying and saying my boyfriend isn’t here because he’s sick, but then I’d probably start rumors of a fake boyfriend I’ve made up in my mind. Which would be true, since my real boyfriend is no longer my boyfriend and isn’t actually sick. It’s very complicated.

  I manage to get away from Aunt Louise before she’s able to give me advice on how to land a man. She’d started to, but then my dad cut in and saved the day. I don’t need her advice right now. I don’t want to talk about my love life, even though everyone else wants to talk about it. I need to remember not to do this to anyone else, if the situation ever arises. It’s a crappy place to put someone in.

  I go to the table where I’m assigned to sit and plop down at the seat where my place card is. To my left there is “Jared Moody” on the little white card at the head of the place setting next to mine. I want to take the place card and rip it into tiny pieces, but instead I turn it around so his name won’t be staring at me, taunting me. It’s bad enough that I have to sit next to an empty seat all night.

  I look over to see Anna and Jonathon laughing and smiling as they talk to their guests. The reception hall is gorgeous. Large billowy clouds of fabric hang from the ceiling, the colors Anna chose are all over the room in complementary ways. It’s elegant and romantic, like something out of a bridal magazine. It’s hard to believe that Anna pretty much arranged this all by herself. Maybe wedding planning is her calling in life.

  During dinner, I only had a few questions about where Jared was and why there was an empty seat next to me, so it was only a few times that my heart was basically gutted from my chest. It felt worse than that, if I’m being honest.

  I keep to myself, trying desperately to avoid relatives and long-time family friends that will ask me questions I don’t want to answer. Luckily the dancing starts and there’s been just enough alcohol to get a large crowd to the dance floor. With the focus on dancing and the loud music, I’m able to sit at my table without any interruptions.