Vivian's Return

by Cooper-Posey, Tracy

  He stepped back away from her, his eyes daring her to continue with the facile conversation she had been going to follow.

  Vivien swallowed dryly, trying to keep her knees locked so that they would continue to support her weight. She looked around to see if anyone had been close enough to hear what he had said but he had been speaking very quietly and the only people who were watching their conversation—quite a few of them, she realized—were too far away to overhear.

  “Well, have a nice night,” she said lamely and turned to go back to her table.

  Paul caught her wrist as she passed and she stopped at his light touch, their shoulders level. Vivien glanced at him again, trying to get her hammering heart under control so that she could hear what he said.

  Paul glanced around for eavesdroppers himself, then spoke with a low, flat, forceful voice. “I haven’t seen you for over twelve hours and it’s killing me. We’ve lost seven years already, Vivien. I want you by me all the time. Marry me.”

  She could feel her eyes widen. Around them, couples were forming for the next dance and the music struck up again. Paul tugged her gently off the dance floor, which brought them closer to the tables and the avidly curious witnesses to their conversation.

  Vivien glanced at them and then at Paul. “Can we talk later?” she asked pleasantly, her voice neutral and friendly.

  Impatience, annoyance and anger flitted across his face, then he looked around the room himself and his face was rueful when his gaze settled back on her face. He nodded. “Later,” he agreed and whirled away, toward the big table where he and Jenny had settled with a number of other couples.

  Vivien forced her legs into moving under their own volition and made her way back to her table. Jack was already there, and handed her a glass of champagne as she sat heavily in her chair.

  “That looked as if you two were having a very intense argument,” he said. “The crowd lapped it up.”

  “They would,” she said, her voice remote.

  “They’d think otherwise if they knew that you’d become lovers again,” Jack added casually.

  Vivien choked over her mouthful of champagne and dropped the glass back to the table top, sloshing the contents.

  Jack grinned at her reaction and shrugged. “Body language,” he told her. “Intense anger or intense passion—they look the same from a distance but the bodies give it away every time.” He drank. “I gather the crowd isn’t going to get quite the showdown they think they might.”

  Vivien shook her head. “We’ve gone past all that already.”

  “So I gathered,” Jack said dryly.

  “Why on earth did you agree to come here with me, then, Vivien my sweet?”

  “We weren’t...Paul and I hadn’t...”

  “Ahh,” Jack murmured. “I see.” He shrugged and smiled at her. “Well, I’ll just have to dance you off your feet to keep you preoccupied, won’t I?” He stood up and offered her his hand. “Come on.”

  She smiled back at him. “You’re a very nice man, Jack,” she told him.

  “Do me a favor, then. Advertise it. I could use the testimonial.” He tucked her hand under his arm and led her to the dance floor.

  They stayed on the dance floor for a number of dances, as Jack had promised and Vivien was able to relax more and enjoy herself a little, now that she no longer had to watch what she said. Jack was happy enough to let little silences build up between them every now and again and during those silences, Vivien would find her gaze drawing away, across the dance floor to the large round table in the center of the room, where Paul and his friends sat.

  Paul watched her without cease. He had pulled his chair away from the table a little and turned it a little so that he could studying the dance floor without turning. And there he sat, his long legs stretched out, one hand curled around the champagne flute on the table next to him, following her every movement. His brows drew closer together and his face grew more thundery each time Vivien caught a glimpse of him.

  Paul had abandoned all pretense of being Jenny’s charming, carefree companion.

  As soon as the song ended, Vivien knew she must ask Jack to let her sit down again. It wasn’t simply to assuage Paul’s feelings, either. Her own heart was thumping erratically and unhappily. She knew that as soon as the first set of dances after supper were over she would go home.

  As the song ended, however, she felt a hand slide around her waist from behind and its possessive touch told her who it was.

  Jack demurred without protest. He left the dance floor and Paul circled around to face her and pulled her up against him and swept her off around the dance floor.

  “Shall I go home, Paul?” she asked. “The look on your face...anyone could have guessed the truth, looking at you sitting there at the table.”

  “I’m sorry, Vivvy. It’s a knee-jerk reaction. I see you with another man and I can’t seem to think or see anything else. Don’t go. I promise I’ll behave myself.”

  He applied his concentration to the rhythm of the dance and Vivien could feel the warmth of his body against hers through the thin satin of her dress and she felt her own body responding, growing warmer and tingling with the aching need to be stroked and caressed.

  Vivien tried to divert her mind. “You haven’t spoken to Jenny yet, have you?” she asked him. Once he had settled the matter with Jenny, then they could both stop pretending.

  He shook his head. “No.” He sighed. “I’ve suddenly become a coward, Vivvy. If you are right about how she feels, I can’t hurt her. Especially not tonight.”

  Vivien glanced over to where Jenny was laughing and chattering at the table. The girl was almost luminescent with happiness.

  “That’s not cowardice. It’s a perfectly understandable desire not to inflict pain. Just don’t leave her dangling too long.”

  “I wouldn’t do that to her, either.”

  The dance ended and Paul lead her back to her table and with a slightly sour smile, went back to his own.

  Vivien sighed heavily. Soon, it would all be sorted out and she and Paul wouldn’t have to act like semi-strangers in deference to other people’s feelings. She would be free to be with him simply because she wanted to be. Oh and how she wanted to be!

  * * * * *

  Paul poured himself another champagne and grimaced as he took a mouthful. At the moment he’d rather be swilling rye, or scotch but Jenny had her heart set on champagne. Thanks to Vivien’s very gentle chastisement he’d reapplied himself to not spoiling Jenny’s night and his dubious reward was Jenny’s radiant face.

  She returned from the ladies’ room and he refilled her glass with fresh bubbles as she sat down again. He saw that she’d applied fresh pink lipstick and strong perfume wafted in his direction. She smiled her thanks and sipped.

  Paul studied her moodily. She really was a heartbreakingly beautiful girl and she looked gorgeous tonight but the full pink lips did not fill him with the need to kiss them and the sweet face did not urge him to gallantry. He couldn’t help but compare her to Vivien’s exotic uniqueness and Jenny seemed lightweight in comparison. There was no strength there. No substance.

  Why had he thought there was the potential there for a relationship? Had he been drawn by her looks and blind to the superficiality of them? Yes, probably.

  Jenny laid a tiny hand on his. “I was hoping you’d come in tonight, when you drop me home. I have a bottle of Moët in the fridge, waiting.”

  He answered cautiously. “We could ask some others back. Jack and Vivien and these people....” He waved his hand around the empty chairs at the table. The occupants were all dancing.

  Jenny smiled. “I meant, just you.”

  A distant alarm went off in his head. “I don’t think so, thanks.”

  “It’s not like you can complain about being late, or that you have work in the morning.”

  “I know. But the ball doesn’t end until two as it is.”

  She smiled coyly. “We could always leave early.”

/>   The tightening in his gut was his instincts warning him. He realized Vivien may have been right all along and this might be the first salvo in a new bid by Jenny to snare his attention. His wariness lifted a notch or two and he smiled at her. “I wouldn’t want to take you away from your admirers.”

  Her smile faltered a little. “You’re the only admirer who matters.”

  Paul put down his glass and straightened up from his slouch. “Jenny....”

  “What?” She appeared to be waiting breathlessly for his response.

  He shook his head. This was impossible. He couldn’t do this now, here. “This is the wrong time and place to start talking about things like this,” he began.

  “Things like what? I’m merely asking you home after the ball.”

  “No, you’re not merely doing anything like that.”

  Her smile faded. “No, I’m not,” she agreed flatly. “So tell me, what is going on with us, Paul?”

  “I didn’t think anything was going on. We’ve been out a few times, had a laugh, a nice time and as far as I’m concerned, that’s all it was. I like you, Jenny but—”

  “But I love you.”

  Paul resisted the need to wince. This was even worse than he had possibly anticipated. How could he have let things get so far out of hand? Then he realized, he hadn’t.

  Be kind, Vivien’s voice whispered in his mind.

  “Jenny,” he began again, keeping his voice gentle, “I never said there was any future for us. I was very careful not to let you think there might be.”

  She nodded. “There’s no accounting for human weakness, is there?”

  He shoved a hand through his hair and sighed. He was going to have to hurt her. He was going to have to hurt someone who loved him, and he hated himself for what he was going to do, but there was no ducking it.

  He picked up her hand. “Jenny...” Words wouldn’t come to him. He stared at her, desperately searching for the phrases that would lessen the blow but make it clear at the same time. As he watched, her eyes grew luminous and began to sparkle. He realized it was tears he was watching grow in her eyes and it completed his condemnation. He shook his head, appalled. “Jenny....”

  Her chin quivered.

  “Don’t. Please.”

  The music stopped and the singer spoke, “It’s suppertime ladies and gentleman. Supper is being served in the next room, if you’d like to make your way there and we’ll be back in a while to announce this year’s Miss Sunshine and to start the dancing again.”

  Jenny pulled her hand out of his and wiped the back of it across her eyes. “I’m hungry,” she said shortly. “Let’s get something to eat.” She stood and stiffly waited for him to get to his feet.

  Paul’s relief was huge and it added to his wretchedness. Slowly, he got to his feet and escorted Jenny to supper. Never again, he declared silently. I will never hurt someone like that again.

  * * * * *

  Vivien was astonished to see Morris paused in the doorway of the ballroom halfway through supper. He was dressed in a baggy gray tracksuit and his iron-gray hair was spiked and tousled as if he had been woken from sleep. He was staring around, looking for someone in the half-empty room and Vivien raised her hand and waved to catch his eye.

  Relief spread across his wrinkled features and he hurried across the room toward her. “Vivien,” he said and nodded at Jack. “I’m looking for Paul. Do you know where he is?”

  “Getting supper, I’d guess,” Vivien replied, glancing at the empty table Paul had been sitting at all night. “Why?”

  Morris ran his fingers through his hair and Vivien realized that not all of its tousled look was solely attributable to sleep. “That little Taiwanese freighter that had instrument trouble last week—remember it?”

  Vivien nodded. Paul had been on standby but it had reported in later as safe but unable to navigate and had been guided into the harbor by a tug, to have some of its electrical systems repaired before heading off for Perth again.

  “I’ve just had an emergency call. They’ve run aground on African Reef and the ship’s down deep in places. They need the Sikorsky.”

  Vivien and Jack both stood up. Jack dug into his coat pocket. “I’ll go and get the Sikorsky fueled and checked.”

  “I’ll find Paul,” Vivien said.

  * * * * *

  Paul was standing in the queue stretched out before the long buffet table that groaned beneath a gourmet’s delight, Jenny next to him. He was preoccupied with his self-condemnation and Vivien had walked right up to his side before he noticed her.

  “I need to speak to you,” she said. Her tone was pleasant. Deceptively so, he realized. He glanced at Jenny, who was watching Vivien with narrowed eyes. Jenny’s ego was fragile right now. He didn’t want to deliver another inadvertent blow, especially not after just declaring to himself that he would never do such a thing again.

  Vivien shook her head impatiently. “It’s an emergency, Paul and I’d rather not spread the gory details about the room.”

  He glanced over her shoulder to see Morris hovering self-consciously at the side of the arches, watching them anxiously. He nodded and looked at Jenny. “Jenny, why don’t you get some supper for yourself?”

  She shook her head. “No.”

  “Fine. If you go back to the table, I’ll have Edward get you a drink—”

  “No!” she shot back, overriding him. “Don’t send me away like a child.”

  “I’m not,” Paul said, feeling a tinge of impatience. “There’s an emergency on, Jenny. I have to—”

  “Do you think I don’t realize that?” she cried. Around them, conversations faltered and heads turned.

  He took her elbow and cajoled her toward a quiet corner of the room. He sensed Vivien trailing after them.

  “Don’t do that to me!” Jenny demanded, wrenching her elbow from his grip. “Damn it, I’m not stupid! I’m not some innocent child who needs protecting! So there’s a god-damned emergency on! Gee whiz, holy cow! I’m flabbergasted with surprise. Your whole life is an emergency, Paul. You like it that way, so don’t try to lock me out of it.”

  “I’m not. I didn’t want to spoil your night any more than I have already. I need to discuss the details with Vivien. That’s all.”

  Jenny shot Vivien a glance and Paul saw fresh tears in her eyes. “Oh, yes,” Jenny said bitterly. “The great and mythical Vivien. I couldn’t possibly hope to compete with the god-like Vivien. I haven’t quite managed to learn how to walk on water, yet.”

  “Jenny....” Paul began.

  “Don’t say anything,” Jenny shot back but her voice was lower, contained, tired. “Do you think I don’t understand how it is? She crooks her finger and I’m dismissed.” She smiled brightly and one single tear rolled down her softly rounded cheek. “Well, I’m going, see?” And she swept away.

  Paul closed his eyes. “Damn it to hell!”

  “It’s done now,” Vivien said gently. “And there’s no time. Later, afterward, you can talk to her then.” She waved to Morris, who crossed the room quickly and stepped into the corner, keeping them as a modest shield between him and the rest of the well-dressed crowd.

  “They need the Sikorsky,” Morris told him. “That Taiwanese carrier has gone down on African Reef. There’s a good swell up tonight and nowhere dry for survivors. It’ll take a boat two hours to get out there.”

  Paul nodded. “I’ll take her up, then. I’m the only one in town with an instruments rating while David’s in Broome.”

  Vivien made a tiny impatient-sounding noise and then he remembered. She had an instruments rating too.

  “We’ll need someone to operate the winch,” Paul added.

  “Jack has gone back to get the Sikorsky ready,” Morris said.

  “Great. Anything else needed?” Paul asked him, looking at his watch.

  “She hit pretty badly,” Morris said. “Broke her back and sank. There’re people trapped in the hull, under water. That’s the real emergency.” />
  Paul felt his heart thump once, hard. Time was critical.

  “We need a diver,” Morris finished, looking at him hopefully.

  Paul couldn’t help but look at Vivien. He recalled the promise she had asked him to make about diving on emergency. He had refused to promise not to do any more diving and this was why. This was just the sort of emergency he had been thinking of when he said that sometimes he simply had no choice.

  He could see the understanding in her eyes. She knew what he was thinking.

  He turned back to Morris. “You’ll have to come and operate the winch,” he said. “I’ll fly her out there and Jack can handle the controls once we’ve found the reef.” He took a deep breath, a reluctant one, he realized. “I’ll have to dive.”

  “No, I’ll do that,” Vivien said firmly.

  Morris looked at her, surprised. Paul felt the cold clutch of concern too and Vivien must have seen it in his face, for she spoke directly to him. “I’m a qualified diving instructor. I haven’t spent all my spare time flying.”

  Morris smiled. “Well, all right—”

  “No,” Paul said softly.

  “Don’t be silly,” she said. “You’re not qualified. I am. Who else is there?”

  “There’s no one else.” Morris answered. “Vivien’s perfect.”

  Paul shook his head. “We’ll find someone else, if we have to. There’s a whole room full of people here, for a start. Someone will have diving qualifications.”

  “Not like mine,” Vivien pointed out. “Nor, probably, with my experience. I’ve done night diving, Paul, a lot of it. Not many people have and it’s really easy to panic and lose your orientation at night. I’ve specialized in rescue work.”

  He shook his head. No. There was no way he could let her do this. He didn’t care what her qualifications were.

  “Damn it, Paul,” she began furiously. “You agreed that I would have perfect freedom, just as you do and now you’re breaking your word. Don’t do this to me.”

  He cupped her upper arm and slid his fingers down her hot flesh. “I agreed that you could work as a pilot, Vivvy. I can’t let you out there during an emergency. It’s—”