Kinky Book Club Trilogy: Written Submission, unSubmissive and Undercover Submissive

by Daisy Philips

  At least it wasn’t Nigel again. Nigel. He definitely wasn’t cut out to be a Dom but Gabriel didn’t have the heart to cut him loose. He must be getting soft or something, but the guy’s love for his submissive Charity impressed Gabriel. To give her what she needed, he was willing to master a skillset that he would have had no interest in otherwise. That was love.

  Or lunacy.

  He couldn’t get it out of his mind.

  He wondered what it would be like to have that kind of relationship, to love someone so unconditionally that you’d do anything, everything to please them. He’d asked Andrew what kind of ballbuster this so-called submissive Charity was. He’d assumed she’d forced Nigel into this.

  Andrew had set him straight. Charity didn’t know what Nigel was doing and would be horrified if she understood just how much of a Dom he wasn’t by nature. Andrew had offered to talk to her, to help Nigel mediate a middle ground position, but apparently Nigel had shown some Dom chops after all and he had forbidden Andrew or anyone else to contact Charity and let her know about his plant to become the Dom she needed.

  His training, he explained, was his gift to her and he wouldn’t have her made to feel guilty over a decision he himself had made.

  Definitely lunacy, Gabe decided. And yet… to love someone that much... and be loved by them.

  He tried to push the thoughts out of his brain. He would never experience that kind of relationship. He had tried once. It had ended in disaster. Besides, he barely knew Amanda. She barely knew him. Two play sessions and aftercare did not make a relationship. Hell, he wasn’t the relationship type. With anyone. Ask his ex-wife.

  He and Amanda definitely weren’t Nigel and Charity. Amanda deserved a Master who would love her and look after her and maybe even marry her one day and make little red-headed babies with her. All he could give her was orgasms. A woman like Amanda deserved more.

  He wasn’t even sure why he’d played with her the second time. The first he could justify to himself as training, but the second was because he couldn’t bare seeing another man touching her.

  Then the next week, the week he’d seen her sitting in the unattached subs area. His cock jumped in response to his arousal at the thought of playing with her. He’d walked over there without conscious thought. He’d just suddenly found himself standing at the entrance to the unattached subs area and Amanda in front of him, kneeling so beautifully, waiting, then she’d looked up at him with such longing in her face.

  That’s when the panic set in.

  Panic. There was no other term for it. She looked up at saw him. She smiled, her gaze warm and inviting. He could see in her eyes that she was developing feelings for him. She was everything he had ever wanted in a submissive and a woman and he wasn’t even considering the absolutely stunning package it was all wrapped in.

  Then that other Dom had spoken to her… He’d been green-eyed with jealousy, but that had woken him up. He didn’t want her to develop feelings for him and he didn’t want to develop feelings for her. He didn’t do relationships.

  That’s why he’d chosen Nancy. Amanda would see that he wasn’t someone she should have feelings for and move on.

  If he’d been thinking with even half his brain, he’d never have chosen Nancy, but he’d panicked and Nancy was the closest to him. She was a terrible fit for him. She did not like pain at all. He had come to his senses on the way to the spanking bench but he couldn’t humiliate her by taking her back after he’d chosen her, so he’d done the mildest scene he’d done since he was eighteen and a baby Dom.

  The next week he’d chosen better, choosing Sandy, or so he thought. She had no interest in a relationship. But she needed more pain than he felt comfortable dishing out. He tried to forget the crushed look on Amanda’s face when he passed her over again. It was like a dagger in his own heart. She must hate him and he deserved it.

  He’d given Sandy what she needed in that scene, but he wouldn’t be playing with either Nancy or Sandy again. Hell, he hadn’t even had sex with either of them, hadn’t really even gotten aroused. Luckily he knew many ways of giving them pleasure without actually having to fuck them. They’d both gone away more than satisfied by their encounters.

  Unfortunately he’d been too good at giving them what they needed. Whenever he walked by the unattached subs area, the two of them gave him the please choose me look. How had his life gotten so complicated?

  Chapter Seven

  Just over Nine Months Later

  Amanda sat in the break room talking to some of the other submissives, waiting for the start of the last training class of this session, the third that she’d been a part of. She thought again about how grateful she was to Andrew. He’d seen her kneeling and miserable in the unattached subs area and had taken her aside and asked her to help with an upcoming training class.

  She was so glad she had said yes. And it wasn’t just the training she loved. She’d gotten to know the other submissives and a number of the Doms in the club who also participated in the training sessions. She made friends, some of whom she started hanging around with outside the club. One of the sub’s she helped train, Jane, had become a good friend of hers as well as a member of the Kinky Book Club. Jane was also known as Jayne Valentine, erotic romance writer. She’d taken the training for research purposes and left with a Dom of her own. Her best friend Rick was back at the club as well, with is fiancé Maggie who was new to submission.

  The number of participants in the training session and their composition dictated the number of trainers required. Single trainee Doms and subs were appointed a mentor who they would practice with between classes. Couples also got a mentor. Then there were the general training staff. That’s what she was a part off. Often she worked with a teaching Dom during demonstrations of correct procedure and techniques. Then she observed and advised the various couplings as they practiced.

  Everything was going great except for one thing. She still didn’t have a Dom of her own.

  For each three month training session, he gave the introductory talk at the first class. He welcome them and talking about the club and the high standards that members were held do. There were seven individual classes in a session and they were held every second week for three months. Gabe gave a demo at most sessions. When he was there, he always chose Amanda to assist him.

  The first time, it hadn’t been a big deal, but by the third time he’d chosen her, the others started to tease her. By the fifth, it was old hat and everyone expected him to use her in his demonstrations.

  She’d had to miss one session due to a cold and her colleagues told her with glee how he’d come in, looked around and, when told she wouldn’t be there that night, he’d left without a word.

  He never played with her outside the training sessions. When they spoke, it was limited to generalities about the weather and similar topics. She told herself that the fact that she had this strange relationship had nothing to do with the fact that she was no closer to finding a Dom of her own than she was nine months ago, but she was a liar. She was still hung up on the thick-headed Dom but she made sure he didn’t see it by refusing to behave as a submissive with him except when they were in a scene. When they were in the employee lounge before or after training sessions, she talked to him as an equal, not a sub with a Dom.

  She took a sip of coffee. The door opened. In walked Jane and Maggie. They were going to talk during tonight’s class about how becoming submissives had impacted their lives and relationships.

  “How are things going at work, Amanda?” Maggie asked. “Rick told me that there were rumors that your company was having problems.”

  “It might be worse than that. I wouldn’t be surprised if they filed for bankruptcy. That way they won’t have to give us packages.”

  “Oh, no. I hope you are wrong! Is there anything we can do to help?”

  “Keep your ears open of you hear about any jobs for someone with my qualifications.”

  “What kind of company are you
looking for?” Jane asked. “Big, small, financial services, manufacturing?”

  “I’ve worked for both big and small companies. I’d prefer something small. I like the fact that you get to do all sorts of things. All aspects of accounting, payroll, even office management. I like the sense of camaraderie a small company has. Of course, at the end of the day, I need a secure job and beggars can’t be choosers.”

  “You know, I may know just the job…”

  Gabriel paced back and forth. The last class of this series had ended and he wouldn’t be able to play with Amanda until the next session started in a few weeks. He was already feeling like he was in withdrawal.

  Of course, he could ask her to play outside a training session, but if he did that, he would have to admit he had feelings for her. Besides the inevitable I told you so from Andrew, he just couldn’t do that to Amanda. The more he go to know her, the stronger his feelings got. Even when she made it clear that outside the training sessions, she wasn’t going to allow him to treat her as a submissive… hell, it was actually kind of a turn on when she got bossy with him. Andrew had joked that maybe Gabriel had a bit of the submissive in him. He’d threatened to fire Andrew who just laughed. Gabriel threatened to fire him almost weekly.

  But maybe his friend wasn’t too far off. If not a submissive, then he had to be a bit of a masochist to keep playing with a submissive who could never be his. No, that wasn’t accurate. She would be his in a second if he asked, which he never would. He had tried relationships before. His ex-wife had been very clear when she left him. He sucked as a husband and he would be doing collective woman-kind a favor if he never married again. After his next two attempts at relationships went down in flames, he’d taken her words to heart.

  He couldn’t, he wouldn’t give Amanda what she wanted. He cared too much about her for that. Now he needed to take the next step and stop playing with her during training. He should let her go and stop playing with her during training. He was a selfish ass who put his own needs first. One day Amanda would realize this and leave him. He knew that. It would probably be kinder in the long run if he left her, but he didn’t have the strength of character or selflessness to do that. His ex-wife was right about him.

  As if the whole Amanda situation wasn’t enough, his work life had just gotten exponentially worse. His latest accountant had quit, fed up with Gabriel’s lousy record keeping and worse temper. Nine months on the job and guy had just walked out without giving notice saying he couldn’t work for Gabriel any more.

  Great!

  Luckily Andrew had talked to him and persuaded him to give a partial notice by promising that he wouldn’t have to see or talk to Gabriel ever again, but even Andrew couldn’t persuade him to stay longer than that. So his last day would be the Friday before Gabe got back from his upcoming vacation.

  Good riddance as far as Gabriel was concerned. He didn’t need to pay for someone to keep his books. Gabriel himself had installed the accounting system and he had looked after the accounting by himself for years. Sure, the system was a few years out of date and had a few quirks, but it worked. And, okay, the volumes had gone up as the club grew.

  Fine. He couldn’t actually do it himself and actually oversee the club activities. And sure, the accounting system would have to be replaced one of these days, but not right now. And he hated the whole hiring process. Clearly he also sucked at it considering he’d hired the idiot who had just left him in the lurch. Damn, he hated change.

  He paced.

  Vacation. Gabriel was leaving Sunday to meet up with a bunch of ex-SEALs from his old team. They met up once a year for a week of some extreme sports fun. This year it was black diamond skiing in Colorado just outside Aspen.

  He brooded for a while when the answer came to him in a flash.

  Andrew, as operations manager, was responsible for the making sure the club operations ran smoothly. Hiring and firing staff surely came under that heading.

  Gabe texted, “Andrew, can I see you in my office?”

  Chapter Eight

  Monday afternoon

  The way Andrew described the job, it sounded great. Hell, even if she didn’t like the duties, it was a paying job and that’s something she needed badly since all the staff had been sent home Friday and told not to come back.

  What wasn’t so great was that she’d have to see Gabriel every day. She took a big breath. She was moving on. The fact that she hadn’t met anyone she wanted to play with on a regular basis… well, that had nothing to do with Gabriel. She was just exceptionally picky.

  As if reading her mind, Andrew told her she could make her own hours, as long as the job got done. She thought about it. If she got in early and finished early… Gabriel usually came in late because he liked to be on the floor when the club was open…

  Yes, it could work. She was over him and her fantasy of happy ever after with him. Yup, didn’t care about his sorry ass, not at all. She’d had a wonderful time working with new Doms. She was even okay with playing with Gabriel as a part of the sessions. She didn’t consider it personal. She was the only submissive that wasn’t paired up with one particular trainee during the classes so of course he demoed with her.

  She’d just completed her third cycle as a trainer. She’d even played a time or two with some of the new Doms after they graduated. There was no spark with any of them. She had no interest in starting a relationship and they felt the same. Playing together was just a way of having fun, but eventually they all met a sub they had chemistry with and moved on. It actually made her feel good, seeing them with someone they were meant to be with and she enjoyed that just as much as the actual training and helping the new Doms and subs find their joy in the lifestyle.

  Would she still be allowed to help with the training if she took this job? She asked Andrew who didn’t have a problem with her continuing.

  Amanda asked for more information on the job and listened carefully as Andrew tried to explain the accounting system. He finally just signed onto it and let look over the system. Within half an hour she had a good grasp of how things work and had the beginnings of a plan to get the backlog up to date.

  Andrew listened to her ideas and then offered her a job on the spot. “Please, Amanda. I’m begging you. The place is a mess. Payroll has been late twice in the last three months and now Gabriel is threatening to handle the books himself. The staff are frankly terrified and threatening to quit if he does. As much of a bear as he was normally, when he had to wrestle with the accounting system, he was twice as bad. They’ve even offered to kick in some money for a bribe if you’ll take the job.”

  “How do they even know that I can do the job? Or that I am interviewing for it?”

  “Once the last guy quit, I’ve been inundated by requests that I hire you to replace him. You know, Amanda, you are really well liked by all the membership. They also think you can handle Gabe too. In fact…”

  “What on earth do you mean, handle Gabe? I let him handle me in the classes, but there’s nothing else between us.” Amanda realized her tone was too sharp. She didn’t want Andrew to think she was protesting too much. “Look, Andrew. Gabe had built a wonderful club and I greatly admire his business skills, but there’s nothing between us. Nothing.”

  “If you say so. Regardless, can you thing about the offer? Please. We need you, Amanda.”

  “I don’t have to think about it. When do you want me to start?”

  “Is today too soon?”

  Chapter Nine

  Saturday, Meeting of the Kinky Book Club, Night & Day Restaurant

  “So how’s the new job going?” Amanda looked over at Maggie and then around the table. All of the members of the Kinky Book Club waited with baited breath for the response.

  “It’s great so far. Maybe losing my other job was a blessing in disguise. Working for a small company means I can do a bit of everything. Then again, I’ve only been there a week and Gabe has been away the whole time.”

  There was some laughter
.

  “Gabe?” Maggie laughed. “Master Gabriel lets you call him that?”

  Amanda grinned. “I’ll find out when I call him Gabe at work on Monday.”

  “Oh, Amanda. I would pay good money to be there when he finds out that Andrew hired you!” Cara grinned.

  Amanda felt her stomach drop. “You don’t think he knows?”

  “I’d lay odds that he doesn’t. Oh, sweetie, don’t worry about it. You know Gabriel. He’ll roar when he sees you. He’ll grouse and grumble and act like a bear with a sore paw, but you know he’ll secretly be delighted.” Amanda wished she felt as confident as Maggie sounded.

  “We’ll see. It seemed like a good idea when I took the job, but now I’m getting nervous.”

  “You know, we’ve discussed it and come to the conclusion that he crazy about you, Amanda.” Jane chimed in. “But he is also crazy and has been fighting it for some idiotic reason.”

  “…because he’s a man!” Maggie offered.

  Jane nodded and continued, “He can’t help it. I’ve only known him a short time, but I’ve seen the way he looks at you. And I heard about those two scenes he did with you. I wish I’d seen them. They’d make great research for the book I’m writing.”

  Amanda blushed as she shook her head. “They were no big deal. I was just helping Andrew train Nigel for Charity.”

  “Very grateful!” Charity piped up with a big grin. “You guys did a great job! Nigel has developed quite the talent with the riding crop. I had to sit on a cushion last Sunday my bottom was so sore.”

  “Yes, well, you are welcome, I think. But like I was saying, it’s not like Gabriel sought me out or anything. He saw a training opportunity and did what any good Master would do. He stepped in and addressed the situation.”