Blind Beast Mate: Dystopian Adult Romance (Beast Mates Book 1)

by Milana Jacks

  I bared my teeth. “Don’t fuck around, my brother.”

  “Dewlyn will come. If you go there, she’ll bail again and do something stupid, get herself killed.”

  He’d never forgive me. I revved the engine, pissed at myself for not seeing what was in front of me, and hella pissed at Rey for not telling me.

  I moved the bike to hover over the lighthouse.

  Rey removed her shoes, and her bare feet toed the edge of the pool. The hound barked several times. I didn’t think he liked her standing near the edge. I sure as fuck didn’t.

  The back door slid open.

  Dewlyn stepped outside.

  Rey startled and fell into the pool.

  My heart ceased beating.

  I propelled the bike over the water. It wouldn’t go fast enough. When I got shoreside, I dropped onto the sand, not bothering to land my bike. My feet had never moved faster, and in a single three-hundred-foot leap, I dived after her.

  At the bottom of the pool, Dewlyn tried to get Rey, but Rey was panicking and dragging them both down. Dewlyn’s mane of red hair and Rey’s brown one spread all around them. I couldn’t see shit. So, I yanked them both by their hair. It was all I could see, the first thing I could grip. I swam up and up, and when I reached the top, I had the two by their waists on either side of me. I shook the water from my face.

  Vice stood on the edge and extended his hands. He had a mean look on his face. I handed him his. “If you don’t spank her blue, I will.”

  Dewlyn caught her breath, then kicked and screamed as Vice carried her next door.

  The hound kept barking, running in circles around the pool. Rey didn’t say anything, but I heard her rapid heartbeats. I bent her over the edge, where she coughed out the water from her lungs. Leaning my cheek on her back, I closed my eyes and breathed in deep. My lungs filled, and I released a slow, measured breath when I really wanted to snarl. Anger coursed through me like a living thing. It was better for us that she couldn’t see the silver glow of my eyes. I wanted to war.

  Water from my hair dripped on my shoulders. I gripped my towel and tightened it around me. Dark sat next to my chair and whimpered every now and then as Jamie paced around the bar area in our kitchen. If anger could be felt, I’d drown in it right now. Playing around the deep pool wasn’t smart. I didn’t think it was that deep. I imagined it to be a shallow pond I could dip into. It wasn’t. And it wasn’t because Jamie was a big beast who needed a lot of room. I kept forgetting who he was.

  The refrigerator door opened. “Wanna drink?”

  I barely recognized his voice. Too deep and a bit scary. “No, thank you.”

  “My little brother liked to drink,” Jamie said. “His favorite pastime on this planet. I didn’t understand it, and I hated it, but now I get it.”

  I heard gulping sounds, and the bottle slammed on the bar. I blinked a few times but didn’t startle. “Mom partied, so I know what you mean.”

  Jamie gulped down another drink. “Been watching our house. The girl who brought your dog back is Vice’s…pair. She left him, and I want to know what she told you.”

  “I don’t know her at all.”

  “Hm.” Jamie ran a claw down my shoulder. “How did she get inside the house, Rey? I lock the house when I leave. Every single day.”

  I hung my head. “I test-drove the bike and forgot to engage the security when I went back inside.”

  Gently, he turned my chair and stepped between my bare thighs. “You what?”

  “Forgot to lock…”

  “No, the bike. Tell me about the bike.”

  “The house programmed the directions to places in the city into the phone. The house said I could hook the phone to the bike and that it’d take me where I needed to go. Like on autopilot. The marketplace. The fridge is empty, and you want MachoBeast razors. The blue ones.” When he didn’t say anything, I continued, “I didn’t go. Obviously. I moved it up and down in the driveway. Pretended, you know.” I needed to come clean.

  “I’m gonna sell the bike.”

  I nodded.

  Taking a strand of my hair, he said, “I’m braiding it.” He kissed my forehead, and tears spilled from the edges of my eyes. “I watched you with the cane and the guide hound. I’m thinking the best thing for me to do is to leave and go for a ride. But I can’t ride, because you might bail like Dewlyn bailed. You wanna go back to places you know. I understand. Sure is better for you. Safer where you know everything. You gonna leave me, Rey?”

  “Are you gonna return me?”

  Jamie dropped my hair and stepped back. “You’re not a fucking piece of candy. You are mine!”

  I stood too. “I’m not deaf!”

  Silence resumed.

  I sat back down. “My hearing is somewhat as good as yours. I also have a great palate. I can tell different coffee brands of medium-blend coffee just by tasting it. I really can cook anything and make gourmet butter cookies from just sugar, butter, and flour. Dad used to say it’s art. Also, I have a sixth sense for bullshit, so I know you’re trying to contain your anger. You’re mad.”

  “Fuck yes, I’m mad. Thinking of the kind of shit that could’ve happened… Why didn’t you tell me? This isn’t something to hide.”

  “At first, I wanted to run. But then we…we bonded as a couple. I didn’t want to ruin it. I planned to tell you, but I wanted to try on my own. I can’t depend on you to do everything for me. You’re not my babysitter, you’re my better half. I should be your better half, not your pain in the ass. I hate being a burden. I wanted to be—”

  “Worth it?”

  “Productive. But yes, you paid a fortune for me. I also want to bring something into our pairing. I didn’t know how. Don’t return me.” There, I’d said it.

  “I want to know why that is. What’s wrong with going back? Leslie seemed nice, and your uncle is a pussy. Most girls we get wanna go back home. Your sister went back.”

  “She’s dead, and he’ll shoot me too.”

  “Say that again.”

  “He’ll make me disappear. I’m useless to him. I won’t entertain any of his games. I can’t fuck—”

  “Shhhh, don’t say it,” Jamie interrupted. “That’s what he told you, didn’t he? To shut up and put up, and that’s what you’ve been doing. Leading me on so now I gotta decide.”

  “I’m sorry.” I started removing my rings. I yanked them off and placed them on the counter. “It’s a horrible mistake, a horrible lie, I’m a horrible person, but don’t take me back. Uncle Sam lied to you about many things. I’m not worth the price you paid. He’s ripped off more of your men than you’d care to know.” I giggled hysterically. What I was about to tell him would doom the girls in the pairing program, but I didn’t care. Someone had to speak up. “Community Seven? Damaged goods. None of us are virgins. Most of us were used goods since the day we bleed. All that glamor during the parties? It’s all bullshit, Jamie. The pills? Come as a standard package for the paired brides. We all get the pills to keep cool and shut up. If you can’t keep cool, they tell us to swallow the bottle. Then it’s your problem to clean and not theirs. See, they have games. They herd us and make us run through the community. If you get caught, you get raped.”

  “Who caught you?”

  “I’m a fast runner.”

  He cleared his throat. “How did you know where to run?”

  “I could see once, until I didn’t see anymore because I was an excellent runner.”

  “Tell me everything.”

  Sighing, I picked the ends of my hair. “One day during the hunt, I ran and hid inside the stables. My Uncle Sam found me and unzipped his pants. I kicked him in the balls. When I tried to run again, he picked up a pitchfork and swung. It caught the back of my head, and I collapsed. What he did after I passed out, I don’t know, but I woke up with permanent vision damage. That’s it.” Jamie didn’t comment, so I continued. “After, I lay in bed for months. The pills helped. Cutting helped, but I don’t do that anymore. I swam o
ut of it when Dark came around.” Dark didn’t make a peep. Maybe he sensed Jamie wouldn’t hurt me. “This isn’t what you signed up for, and I don’t blame you, but I can’t go back. Sam’s gonna shoot me. Pop!” I mimicked a gun to my forehead. “Done. But, I don’t want you to keep me because you feel sorry for me either. Not just because it’s wrong, but also because we deserve better. Apart or together.”

  Still nothing from Jamie. I lifted my head and looked around the kitchen. “Hello? Are you there?”

  “I’m here,” Jamie said.

  I searched the floor. He must have sat down, so I dropped to all fours and crawled to him. When I found him, I squeezed my body between his legs. “Shitty story, huh?”

  Air whooshed passed me, lifting my hair.

  Something crashed in the living room. I almost jumped out of my skin. My eyes blinked in rapid motion, and I felt around for the wall so I could crawl away from him. I didn’t really know where I was going, just that I didn’t like the sound of crashing around the house.

  Jamie grabbed my hips and pulled me against him. He buried his nose into the crook of my neck. “I’m sorry about that. I’ll clean it up.”

  “Okay.”

  “It’ll take me a while to get used to us, and you’ll need to…talk me through and tell me things. You have to know, I’d do almost anything to keep you. I never wanted you to go back. And certainly not after this.”

  “Thank you.”

  “It’s not a favor. Right now I’m gonna take you upstairs, where you will remain for the rest of the day until I return. You will not try to ride the bike or go in the backyard. You will not open the door for strangers even if they’re dying on the front steps. You will not do anything until I return. You can play with your pussy. That’s it.”

  My shoulders slumped in relief. Jamie carried me upstairs. “Where are you going?”

  “Hunting. Just for sport.”

  Wind blew inside the room when Jamie opened the window.

  He howled.

  Chapter Eleven

  Jamie

  It was seven o’clock the next morning when I returned home, happy to find Rey sleeping in our bed. She liked sleeping, so I didn’t bother her. I showered the blood off my hands and took some time picking off the flesh stuck behind my claws. I scrubbed my jaw. I needed a shave.

  I took her purple razor and ran it over my face. I smiled at the beast in the mirror. My eyes still glowed icy cold, my teeth still in full descent, and my biceps were double their usual size.

  Flesh stuck between my teeth. I threw the razor in the trash.

  Floss in hand, I snuck white strand between my teeth and cleaned up..

  A quiet knock on the door. “Jamie?”

  “Come in, baby.” I opened the door. “I’m just brushing my teeth. Your uncle stinks, but he sure was tasty.”

  “You ate him?”

  Rey paled, so I clarified, “Not all of him. Only the good parts in the middle. My men had the rest.” I threw the floss and the toothbrush in the garbage.

  Despite looking sick in the face, she managed a smile. She’d get through it. I couldn’t treat her like broken glass. She was a woman and my mate, and she wasn’t broken. Also, I had to tell her how shit worked. “You aren’t my pair, Rey. You’re my mate. You are the center of my universe. That’s what a mate is to a beast male. Your people damaged the center of my universe.” I rinsed and spat. “I had to make a show so everyone knows what’ll happen if the girls are treated the way you’ve been treated. We can’t take all the girls from their homes. It doesn’t work that way, and we need our mates. We shut down Community Seven.” Rey gaped at me. I shrugged. They hated us, and they’d hurt the girls because they couldn’t hurt us. “It’s over, and I got shit to do on that front, but me and you? We’re starting over. Let’s do it. Wanna get dressed and go to the marketplace?”

  “Wha… Yeah, uh-huh.”

  “Good, ’cause I ain’t going there by myself. Markets give me the creeps.”

  “You ate my uncle, but the market gives you the creeps?”

  “Mm-hm. Get dressed.” I slapped her ass as I walked by. “I’m in the walk-in.” She followed my voice. I could do this. We’d be fine. “All right, Rey. How much can you see? Anything?”

  “Contrasting colors and you. I can see you. A big dark mass under the lamp.”

  “So I am a black blob in your space, then?”

  Chuckling, she searched for clothes in the laundry basket. She didn’t have anything clean left.

  “Wear one of my T-shirts,” I said.

  “It’s too big.”

  I got a black shirt anyway, and a belt, then dressed her. The shirt’s hem reached to her knees, and Rey was a tall girl with long legs. Man, she was sexy, and my cock hardened. I was an animal. No wonder some girls took off running at a sight of their mates.

  She fiddled with the belt. “You do have belts. Where are they?”

  “The shelf on top of the rack.”

  Rey rose on her toes and reached up. “How tall are you?” she asked.

  “I’m big.”

  “How big?”

  “Thirteen inches.” I didn’t want to tell my height or weight. I didn’t want her to picture a beast, I wanted her to see me. She strained, the hem of her shirt rising. “You can’t reach it. Need a step stool, which I will not provide. You’re clumsy.”

  She gasped. “I am not.”

  I chuckled.

  “This is a woman’s belt.” Rey blushed, but not from being shy. I whistled a low tune, liking her jealousy. I still hadn’t forgiven her for telling me to go bang other women on my mating night. “Well, whose is it?”

  “Do you really want to know?”

  She flung her hair over her shoulder. “I do.”

  “Mom’s. She visits with us. Leaves things so she doesn’t have to bring them along every time.”

  “I’d like to meet her.”

  “You will.”

  “Are you dressed?” she asked and ran a finger down my stomach.

  My cock sprang up as if called to service. Rey dropped to her knees and gripped it. I found her eyes when she looked up, and her little tongue swirled around the tip, testing. Gentle hands stroked me, and I could barely feel her grip. “It’s not gonna break. Shove it inside until it chokes you, and suck the life out it. That’s all there is to it.” Never in a million years would I ask her if she’d done this before. And not only because I knew she hadn’t. If she had, they wouldn’t have hurt her. Man, I’d eat that motherfucker again if I could. The natives call us beasts and said our females shouldn’t be called bitches. Fuck them. No bitch got hurt in this city.

  I snarled.

  Rey paused.

  “No, baby. It’s fine.” I gripped her hair and guided her to fill her mouth. Her hand landed on my thigh when I moved back and forth. It was like she knew I needed this after a bad night. I wanted to feel her, and I wanted to know we’d be fine. The emotional crap gave me the creeps, and this was all I knew how to do. But Rey was all soft and sweet, and she’d make up for the two of us. I took her hand and put it on my balls so she could play around. When Rey gagged, I thrust again. She gagged some more, and I liked that because I was a sadistic prick.

  I guided her head. It bobbed until I came down her throat. Kneeling with her, I kissed her on the mouth.

  “Mmm,” she said. “It’s bitter.”

  “Get used to it. You getting used to it?”

  The smile caught the corners of her eyes. I wanted to fuck her for days. But she was hungry, and so was I. We needed to get going. “I’m gonna invade your space, and when I do”—I played my fingers over her wet slit—“you’re gonna like it.”

  She took my face between her hands, and her smile vanished. Her fingertips roamed over my nose and my mouth, my neck and my arms. “You’ve grown,” she said.

  “It happens.”

  “Did he die a slow and painful death?” she asked.

  “Very slow and painful.”

  �
��Hm.”

  I quit messing around. She had something on her mind. Maybe telling her we ate people wasn’t such a great idea.

  “Do you have tattoos?” she asked.

  My eyebrows drew down. “Yeah, I got many.”

  When her palms cupped my face and tears filled her eyes, a feeling of foreboding came over me. I’d come at her like a semitruck when I should’ve come like a moped. Nice, small, and slow. I felt a hole in my chest. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t keep my mate. She was too sweet, and I was too…me. We had nothing in common. How was I gonna do this?

  “I love you, Jamie,” she told me.

  Motherfucker. I lunged at her and buried myself to the hilt.

  I made love to her. Love. That’s right. In confirmation, I grunted.

  Chapter Twelve

  Rey

  Jamie was at least a head taller than my five foot nine, so that put him at about six foot four. When he walked, he marched with long strides. Of course, with my hand in his, I jogged. Doors slid open, and cold air swept my skin. Goose bumps rose over my bare shoulders. The market was cold. Abruptly, Jamie stopped, and I ran into his bicep.

  Soft lips pressed my forehead. “Got a list or somethin’?”

  I nodded. “The house made a list for me.” I reached into my backpack and passed him the home phone. “Command: Grocery list,” I spoke into the odd appliance I called a home phone.

  For a while, Jamie was quiet, and then he said, “This isn’t a grocery list. It’s a fucking book.”

  “What’s it about?” I asked, messing with him. It’d been a month since we’d come clean to each other. The weight of our secrets had suffocated us for the first few days of our mating, but not anymore. It could’ve been great from the start, if only we hadn’t hidden from each other. Mating was such a nice bond, much better than pairing. It made me feel owned and loved and, most importantly, safe. Jamie loved me. I didn’t need words to tell me that when I had his actions. Jamie took care of me.

  “The book is about this Alpha Beast, who went to the store and ended up in one of his own jails.” He huffed and puffed at the list, then strode away. I followed, my hand in his. “The veggies are on the right,” he said. He placed my hands on something soft. Tomatoes. “Pick those. I got…eggplant. I didn’t know eggs grew out of the ground around here.”