At Night, I Become a Monster

by Yoru Sumino

  O…kie dokie?”

  I was a little startled at her proposition.

  Bargaining terms. I’d thought she was some kind of idiot, someone who couldn’t read the situation. Apparently, I was wrong.

  She stared at me with her great big eyes.

  I had lost.

  After thinking on it, I nodded. I figured it was better to agree to a bargain where both sides could blackmail the other, rather than leave myself open to uncertainty, not knowing what might happen next. It was far too dangerous to let her run loose—this girl who knew the me behind the monster. She was the kind of person who always said more than she needed to.

  Thinking about it afterwards, perhaps I wanted someone to know that I could turn into a monster. Some part of me probably wanted to take pride in it.

  I steeled myself, taking care that my voice would not betray me. “All right,” I said—and as I did, the girl once again gave that smile.

  “Won…der…ful,” she replied.

  I wasn’t sure I agreed. What would have been most wonderful was not getting caught by that girl at all.

  …Right. Speaking of. What was this girl doing sneaking into school in the middle of the night? As I worried over whether or not to interrogate her, she spoke first. A peculiar question crossed her lips.

  “Acchi-kun, is that…a…kigurumi?”

  I swiftly dodged as she reached her arms out, trying to touch my front legs. I was unsure what might happen if a person touched me. Would anyone else really dare to touch me so suddenly? Who could imagine this form of mine to be a costume?

  “It’s not.”

  “Ah… I see. So…it isn’t. It doesn’t seem like you’re…wearing a kigurumi…right now.”

  Though I tried to speak with a threatening edge to my voice, this girl was not one to be so easily intimidated. Once again, she tried to touch me. What was with her? She was such a…

  Actually, what was with all the “Acchi-kun, Acchi-kun?”

  “I don’t recall you ever calling me ‘Acchi’ before.”

  In attempting to speak normally, caught up in the flow of the conversation, I inadvertently outed myself as “Acchi” out loud. However, this girl was already someone who spoke to a monster as though it were her normal classmate. She deliberately shook her head, like such small details did not concern her.

  “I have…not. But that’s what…you’re called, isn’t it? I am…Yano Satsuki, don’t…you remember? Do you like to…use nicknames? Or…normal names?”

  “…Full names. Yano-san, what are you doing here? In this classroom?”

  “I came…to play. But this is…out of hand. Let’s…fix this.”

  Without awaiting my reply, Yano-san began to right the desks that I had knocked over. I couldn’t just stand there and watch her fix the mess that I had made, so I began to straighten the desks one by one with my tail. “How…convenient,” she said, softly.

  After rearranging the desks more neatly than they had been when I arrived and fixing the timetables back to the wall, she looked at me and then made a gesture as though wiping sweat from her brow.

  “Thanks…for the help.”

  “No big.”

  We had never once been together in any group or student council or club. I felt no comfortable sense of accomplishment from working with this girl. I’d never even desired to speak to her before now.

  Yano-san pounded her fist once. “That’s…right.”

  I wasn’t sure what she was going to say, but I got the sense that something strange was going to come out of her mouth again. However, it was an unexpectedly straightforward question.

  “You were ques…tioning me…but before that…I’m so curious to know, if that’s… not a kigu…rumi, then how is it you look…like that, Acchi…kun?”

  I had no idea what to tell her, but I thought that I better at least say something and opened my mouth to speak. Just then, suddenly, a familiar sound rang throughout the classroom.

  I must be sensitive to sounds, because I recoiled in shock.

  I had no idea that the school bells chimed even at night. Though there were a few homes around the campus. You’d think that it would be considered a disturbance of the peace.

  When I looked at Yano-san, however, she did not appear surprised at all. This must not have been the first time that she snuck into the school if she knew that the bells would chime. However, things were a little more complicated than that.

  “Ah… Looks like…midnight break is…coming to an…end.”

  She pulled her phone from her pocket and fiddled with it, and the chiming stopped.

  “Wh-what was that noise?”

  “That was…the warning bell. If I…don’t hear the…chime, I’ll… forget. Midnight…break will be over in ten…minutes.”

  What on earth was “midnight break?” Just as I began to fume over Yano-san talking nonsense on top of her strange actions, she held both of her palms out towards me. Perhaps she couldn’t tell how disgruntled I was underneath my dark, monstrous face.

  “Let’s…continue this…tomorrow.”

  “T-tomorrow?”

  Did she mean during school? No way. Absolutely, positively not. There was no way I would be seen speaking to Yano-san, let alone risk looking chummy with her.

  “Um, Yano-san…”

  “It’s…fiiine! I don’t mean during…the day. Try and come here…a little earlier…tomorrow night.”

  “Here?”

  “Yes…here. Can you…come?”

  Though Yano-san didn’t say it, the threat was implied that if I did not come, she would start telling everyone. The effect of her holding that fact over me was immediate. Though we ostensibly had a mutual agreement, if that agreement was broken, the damage would fall disproportionately on my side.

  Having no other choice, I nodded.

  What an utter, tremendous turn this night had taken, that despite this monstrous form of mine, I should be ordered around by such a weird girl.

  Annoyed at the look of joy on Yano-san’s face, I slipped through a tiny crack in the window and leapt outside without another word.

  It wasn’t until the sun was rising and my human form returned that I realized I had forgotten my homework.

  My entire evening had been an utter waste.

  Wednesday

  Day

  SINCE I STARTED becoming a monster, I no longer sleep at night.

  However, for the first time in ages, I thought that it all might have just been a dream. There was absolutely no rational explanation behind my becoming a monster and going to school in the middle of the night, only to find a girl from class there and have a conversation with her—let alone agreeing to a secret meeting. For all I knew, maybe the past weeks of my becoming a monster were all just a vivid dream, too.

  Though reckless and unfortunate, no matter how you slice it, that kind of thinking is normal. Honestly, even if it was a dream, there still had to be something wrong with me. That was some imagination. Transforming into a monster and meeting Yano of all people?

  I hopped on my bike and set off for school, clinging to my comfortable delusion right up until I spotted the ruined doghouse. There aren’t words to describe the way looking at it made me feel.

  “Yo, Acchi!”

  Someone punched me lightly in the back as I stood at my shoe box. I already knew who it was, but I made a show of surprise as I turned around.

  “Morning. Oh, did you change your hair?”

  “Heh heh, somehow, having another man notice it doesn’t really do it for me!” Kasai had a toothy grin on his face as he took a dancing step into his indoor shoes. Kasai was a great deal shorter than me, so I was quick to notice his new flair. Standing at the foot of the stairs, I was wondering whether someone might find fault with it when a voice came from behind us.

  “Kasai, you get rid of that perm immediately.”

  My petrified friend and I both turned to see the school nurse standing there, grimacing. Her name was Noto.

&
nbsp; “You don’t expect me to shave it off, do you?” Somehow Kasai always managed to crack a joke in the face of a warning, no matter who the teacher was.

  “There’s no point in a punishment if it doesn’t make you reflect on your actions,” she said and walked away.

  What might she say to me if she knew that I had snuck into the school? I began to wonder, letting my mind run wild with all kinds of terrible scenarios, as Kasai once again moved to climb the steps. I followed quickly behind.

  “Acchi, were you starin’ at Non-chan there? You got a thing for old ladies?”

  “No way. And anyway, she’s not that old.”

  “Isn’t she like thirty?”

  The hallway was packed when we reached the third floor. Our teachers kept telling us that this would be the year we needed to focus on our exams, but the reality of that had yet to really sink in for us. I turned towards the classroom and took one step, and then another. Naturally, my gaze was drawn to my classroom. My classmates swarmed in and out of the entrance of that box, like ants from a mound.

  One of them walked towards us, so Kasai raised his hand and gave them a mild greeting. Then someone else came out from the other side and caught my gaze. A shiver ran down my spine. The girl, just now leaving the classroom, waved the cleaning cloth she held in one hand. She began walking our way with a satisfied grin.

  Yano Satsuki found us, as smug as you please. She opened her mouth to chat as though everything were completely normal. “Good mor…ning.”

  She greeted us in her weird way, the emphases and pauses in her words all wrong. The two of us said nothing until we passed her by, not even looking in the direction of her voice. I patted my chest in relief.

  There was such a ruckus in the classroom that you could hear it from the hallway. We entered the room, Kasai greeted everyone, and the whole class reacted. I managed a greeting of my own, but that got lost in the mirth surrounding Kasai. Thank goodness he decided to change his hair that day. While everyone was busy ribbing him, I slipped into my seat, blending into the background. My face pretty much said, What? I’ve been here the whole time.

  I moved my math textbook from my locker to my desk. It was the same book I’d bungled bringing home last night. I should have used the time I had left to complete my homework, but I couldn’t think of anyone in my class who would have tried to make that kind of desperate recovery. Not because of one piddly little homework assignment, anyway. I couldn’t bear the thought of being laughed at as some kind of study freak, so I had no choice but to keep my head down for the day and admit to forgetting.

  With that decision made, I had nothing in particular to occupy myself with during that morning period, so I just passed the time fiddling pointlessly with my phone, exchanging greetings and making light conversation with the students in the surrounding seats as they arrived. Really, it wasn’t so bad. Kudou sat down at the seat next to mine, her double teeth poking out from a toothy smile. She’d been in the same class as me since we were first years, so we always got on well.

  After some time, Yano returned, her cleaning cloth swaying in her hands. Water from the cloth dripped onto the floor, like she hadn’t wrung it out properly. I can’t say that made her any more popular with the people around her. As I wondered what she intended to do with such an excessively wet cloth, she moved over to her own desk and began leisurely wiping down the top. I caught the spectacle out of the corner of my eye. From my seat in the very back, Yano’s was situated two squares away diagonally, a quick hop for a bishop in chess or shogi. I wasn’t exactly sure what was up with Yano’s desk that it needed cleaning, but it was obvious that something had happened.

  Once she was satisfied with her careful cleaning job (or maybe she had simply given up), Yano walked toward the front of the classroom again, swinging her cloth in her hand. Just as she passed by Kasai and the others, who were still loitering in the front, she called out in a lilting voice. “You changed…your hair!” Something about her manner was just…inconsiderate, somehow. That same self-satisfied smile sat upon her face. Naturally, not a single one of them looked her way. Yano didn’t fail to notice. She was used to it. She had barely any reaction to the lack of reaction as she exited the classroom.

  Once she left, a number of kids clicked their tongues loudly. It was business as usual for Yano. If I started worrying about her, I would never stop.

  Either way, I had nothing to do at the moment, so I decided to head for the bathroom. I stepped out into the hall and started walking in the opposite direction of where Yano had headed. The set of bathrooms where she was probably off dampening her cloth again was definitely closer, but if we ran into each other and she tried to talk to me, it would be a pain. She probably wouldn’t say anything about the night before, not wanting to be found out herself, but even so.

  After carefully washing my hands for I’m not sure how long, I stepped back out into the hall to see Midorikawa Futaba standing nearby.

  What a name. It felt like the kind of name only an actress or a manga character could have. She held a book in one hand and glanced my way, a sour look on her face. Her long hair fell to her back, swaying. It gave me a bit of whiplash to deal with two girls with such drastically contrasting personalities first thing in the morning. However, I wasn’t about to let that feeling overwhelm me. I put on a little smile, the same kind of smile I might give to anybody.

  “Morning,” I said.

  “Mm,” Midorikawa signaled back in a tiny voice. The corners of her mouth raised so subtly that I couldn’t tell whether or not she was smiling. Without saying another word, she turned towards the classroom and walked off, as though she had no recollection of ever having met me. It wasn’t that she was mad, though. That was just how she always was.

  I followed behind her, this girl who was the polar opposite of Yano. They couldn’t be more different. Yano was always grinning and saying unnecessary things in that loud voice of hers.

  As Midorikawa entered the classroom, a few students standing near the entrance brightly greeted her. “Good morning!”

  She replied to them collectively with another “Mm,” and a nod, heading to her seat without so much as a word of greeting.

  As she sat down, a girl at a nearby seat piped up. “Futaba-chan, were you at the library again?”

  Midorikawa replied to the question with yet another “Mm” and opened up her book. Clearly, she had no interest in making conversation. Unbothered, the other girl simply turned to another classmate and began chatting with them instead, not seeming at all displeased.

  Midorikawa, though as thick as Yano when it came to reading the room, received completely different treatment than the class’s whipping girl. There were all kinds of reasons why.

  As I passed the time in meandering conversation with my seat neighbor, Kudou, I once again caught a glimpse of Yano in the corner of my eye. She was sitting in her seat, with no one else around, swinging her legs with a smile on her face.

  Finally, the bell rang. Our homeroom teacher, Koike, arrived. As long as the flow of our homeroom and lessons proceeded in their usual way, everything would be fine. I could relax.

  I completely ignored our first period of language arts, and when I spoke up during math lessons in second period, the teacher merely said, “That’s unusual.”

  It wasn’t at all, though. I often forgot my homework, though I usually didn’t stand up and admit as much. I was directed to be sure to bring it in tomorrow and then returned to my own desk.

  After third period’s geography class came to a close, we approached the least relaxing class of all: P.E.

  As we walked to the locker rooms, the girls held a large-scale rock-paper-scissors tourney right in front of Yano, to see who she would be foisted off on. Ah, of course. There were an even number of girls present today. Did the gym teacher really think that it was a coincidence that Yano always ended up the odd kid out when forming warm-up pairs? Did the adults really not remember their own time in junior high?

 
We were all far crueler creatures than any of the adults imagined.

  As we changed, moved to the gym, and started playing something like dodgeball, the teacher blew the whistle. Once warm-ups were through, we remained in pairs and practiced volleyball serves, while the students in the athletics clubs watched us and offered assistance. One had to be at least decent at it to not stand out.

  We split the gym in two between boys and girls and continued our lessons. After giving Kasai a high-five, I happened to look towards the girls. Midorikawa had pulled back her long hair, something she did only for gym. She’d just suffered defeat from a ball served by Iguchi. Just beyond her, I saw Yano lying on the floor, face-up towards the ceiling. Something white was fluttering from her nostrils, so she must have gotten a nosebleed. Some of the girls were observing her, but no one approached.

  “Acchi, who are you lookin’ at? Do you need little Kasai-chan here to help you out?” said Kasai, grinning.

  I replied with a casual “Shut up,” and returned to the court.

  Kasai returned to the court after me, lagging behind when the teacher reprimanded him. He had surely been looking at someone as well. Well, not someone. It was more specific than that, which was probably why he had assumed that I was doing the same.

  “Nice work, every…one,” Yano said to us in the same way that she spoke to the other girls.

  Sure enough, as class ended, the tissues sprouting from Yano’s stopped-up nose were dyed with blood. When nobody replied to her, Yano began trudging towards me, her small body swaying. I turned around and prayed with all my might that she would not bring up anything from the night before. It was Yano, after all, so I couldn’t rule out the possibility.

  But I didn’t need to worry. Yano did no such thing. That said, she was always causing trouble for the people around her, whether by her inability to read a room or because she simply was unaware of her surroundings.

  I was talking to everyone else, trying my hardest not to lay eyes upon Yano’s small receding form, when suddenly, she crouched down—or so it seemed. I wasn’t…actually looking at where I was going. And so, I didn’t notice until it was almost too late, and though I panicked and tried at the last moment to avoid her, I inadvertently ended up kicking her right leg. When I unthinkingly turned back to look, she was on the ground on her backside, the bloody tissues on the floor in front of her.