Free Falling

by Makenzie Smith

  Wally wasn’t included in their group, and I went to him, trying to put everything Trey said out of my mind. But after we left, and were driving back to my place, I couldn’t hold it in.

  “I need to ask you something,” I said to Wally as he drove. “I’m not saying I believe it and I’m not trying to start anything, but I just want to know. I don’t want to have any surprises, okay?”

  “Okay…” he said.

  “How many people have you been with since we broke up?”

  “Uh,” he said, and then cleared his throat. He started needlessly checking his mirrors as he tried to answer. “Five…maybe six.”

  Hardly half the town. It still stung. I hadn’t been with anyone. I think I knew who at least two were. Nicole, obviously, and probably Sheila. I didn’t want to know about them, how it happened, who the others were.

  “I regret all of them,” he said, while I was thinking. “After every one I felt so sick, messed up inside. It’s not an excuse, but I was trying so hard to rid myself of this pull you had on me. It didn’t work. But I’m sor—”

  “It’s okay,” I said. “I don’t want to know details. It was just something Trey said, but I’m not dwelling on it.” I reached across the seat and interlinked our hands.

  “Good. Because I am fucking yours,” he said, pulling a face. “It ain’t even a question anymore.”

  Chapter 46

  There’s no easy way to get through a funeral. You sit and pretend to hear everything that is being said, but really, all you can do is think about the loss, the absence you are going to feel. I’d learned that Theo was a huge part of Wally’s life. While we’d been dating, if he wasn’t at work or with me, he was usually with him. He’d sat with him, cooked for him, cleaned for him. Theo was the reason Wally had such a passion for skydiving. It had been a favorite pastime of his Grandfather’s too.

  Theo had owned the skydive hangar for years. When his health declined, he brought in his friend, Ben, to run it for him. Wally was afraid that now Ben might shut it down. It had never been a huge source of income, but Theo hadn’t needed it to be. He was wealthy on his own, and invested in it strictly because it was what he loved. Wally told me that Ben had been doing it as a favor to his longtime friend, but was burnt out. I hoped he wouldn’t lose that too.

  Instead of sitting with his family, Wally opted to sit with his friend’s at the funeral. It was better that way. These were the people that actually cared about him. He held my hand, squeezing when he needed strength. We went through the motions, listening, shaking hands, accepting hugs. At the graveside, I stood back amongst the trees. Wally was the last person to leave; silently standing over his grandfather’s grave until the sun began to set.

  Wally wanted to be done with it, to move on and remember the happy times, but Theo’s lawyer contacted him right after the funeral. They were reading the will and he had to be there. Wally didn’t want to be.

  Leaning against my kitchen counter, he said, “Am I supposed to be happy that he left me something? I don’t even care what it is. If I’m getting something, the only reason is because my grandpa died.”

  I could see his point, but what if it was something he really wanted? “What if he leaves you some memorabilia or something that is special to you? You might regret declining,” I said.

  He thought about it for the rest of the afternoon and I assumed that he wasn’t going to go, but as I was in the bathroom brushing my hair, I heard him talking in the next room.

  “What time should I be there?” he asked. “Alright,” he sighed. “I’ll go. Just don’t expect me to be happy about anything…Okay. See you then.”

  He wouldn’t go without me. He refused to. He said that whatever was going to happen, he needed me to be there. “You give me strength,” he told me, kissing me softly on the lips. So I went.

  Two days later we were sitting in a conference room. All of his family was there. His mother, two aunts, and an uncle; I counted at least 7 cousins—two had children of their own. With all of their wives and husbands, about twenty people were in the room. Wally and I sat off to the side behind the rest of them. He wanted to make a quick escape once it was all over.

  Theo had been frugal throughout his life and left behind a large estate. The lawyer discussed the smaller things first. He left specific items to different grandchildren, none for Wally—who was growing anxious, fiddling, and unable to get comfortable. I put a reassuring hand on his leg to keep it from bobbing up and down.

  His arm came around the back of my chair as the lawyer started reading the finer points.

  “Each of my children will receive $150,000,” he said. That seemed like a lot, but Lisa and a few others scoffed. Apparently, to them, it wasn’t. “My grandchildren will receive $50,000.”

  Wally’s eyebrows shot up, but then he looked down, not wanting anyone to see his surprise. That was quite a bit. It would change things for him. He could buy a better car or put a down payment on a house.

  “What about everything else?” Lisa asked. It was a shame. Her father was dead, but all she saw were dollar signs.

  The lawyer cleared his throat. “Theo has also left personal notes for all of you, along with this final decree: My home, my investment in Exhilarating Skydives, and an additional $200,000 will be left to Wally Nikolokakis. Any other assets will be liquidated, and donated to The Fisher Center for Alzheimer’s Research.”

  The room was silent, all heads turned and looking back at Wally. His mouth was hanging open. “I, uh…” he managed to get out.

  “WHAT?” Lisa suddenly screeched. His uncle joined in and everyone started speaking loudly, pointing at Wally, and questioning the validity of the will. They were saying many hurtful, unnecessary things. This is what money did to people. Fighting, yelling, accusing. And none of them even needed the money, or assets, or whatever. They all lived perfectly comfortable lives. Greed. It was so ugly.

  The lawyer kept trying to calm them down. “I assure you,” he said. “Theodore was in a very stable frame of mind when he made these changes. This is what he wished.”

  It didn’t do any good, and I leaned over to Wally. “Do you want to leave?” I asked him.

  He nodded.

  With them still arguing and huffing, Wally walked up to the lawyer and said, “Can I have the note he left?”

  “Certainly,” he said, handing him the piece of paper. “You’ll need to sign some paperwork.”

  “Later,” Wally told him and headed for the door. As soon as we made it to the parking lot, Wally unfolded the letter. I noticed the slight smile forming on his lips as he read the words.

  We’d nearly made it to the car when Trey called from the door. “Hold up!” he said.

  “Fucking shit,” Wally muttered.

  “We can leave,” I said. “We don’t have to talk to any of them.”

  “No, it’s fine. Let’s get this over with.”

  Trey’s demeanor was aggressive as he approached us, fists clenched, jaw tight. “It’s not enough is it?” he asked. “It’s never enough. You have to take everything.”

  “What the hell are you talking about?” Wally said. “What have I ever taken from you?”

  Trey pushed out a breath and nodded at me. “Don’t play dumb,” Trey said. “She was mine and you took her. Along with everything else. You’re a piece of shit and everyone acts like you’re this—”

  “She was yours?” Wally cut him off. “I’m not doing this anymore. She dated you and then she dated me. Accept. That. Shit. This girl,” he said, pointing at me, “I fucking love her. Get over it. I’m not letting her go again. Whatever history the two of you have is done, gone. She doesn’t want you!” He was incensed, unable to stop himself. “And you wanna give me shit about our grandfather? When was the last time you spent any time with him? Tell me one thing, one single thing about him that you didn’t hear from your mom or someone else?”

  Trey’s arms were crossed over his chest, his nostrils flaring.

  “That
’s what I thought,” Wally said.

  More people had come outside. Lisa and Maggie were talking heatedly as they made their way over to us. “It’s what daddy wanted,” Maggie was saying.

  “We all know that he wasn’t in his right mind at the end,” Lisa said. “Who knows what Wally might have told him or how he might have swayed him?”

  “You think he would do that?” Maggie said, sounding more hurt than angry. “I can’t be around you right now,” she told Lisa, tears in her eyes. “I can’t be around any of you. Wally can you take me home?”

  “Yeah,” he said and handed me the note from his grandfather. All of us piled into the car and drove away. There was only silence as I read the letter. Wally, it said. Continue to live your dream. Continue to be who you are. Take this and make something of it. Get a degree. Buy a house. Don’t settle. Don’t ever be complacent. There’s more out there. Pawpaw loves you.

  I folded it and placed it in my lap.

  “That’s way more than I expected,” Wally said. “Momma, did you know anything about this?”

  “No,” she said from the back seat. “He never mentioned it to me.”

  “It makes me feel strange. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful. This means that the hangar will get to stay open, but it just feels so…”

  “He loved you,” she said. “Don’t think about anything else. He loved you and he wanted you to have this.”

  “Yeah,” he said. After a few minutes he added. “Lisa and Trey aren’t gonna let this go, are they?”

  “No, sweetie,” his mother said. “Trey will get with one of his lawyer friends and figure something out. Some loop hole. Some stipulation.”

  As soon as she said it, I knew it to be true.

  Chapter 47

  It wasn’t quite summer, but the weather was hot, and Wally convinced me to come over to his house for a swim. We were in the water, my legs wrapped around his waist. He was holding me up, taking the opportunity to squeeze and fondle me as much as he liked.

  “Stop,” I laughed as he squeezed my ass long and hard.

  “Stop having such a sweet ass, I’ll stop wanting to grab it,” he said.

  The hurt of Theodore’s funeral had faded. It had only been a week, but Wally was resilient, focusing on other more important things—just like his grandfather would have wanted. Since his family followed through with their threats of contestation, he didn’t know if he’d actually inherit all that he had left him. It didn’t matter though.

  Losing him, reading his note—the final words he wanted Wally to hear, Don’t ever be complacent. There’s more out there—had lit a fire under him. I didn’t know it, but Wally had an Associate’s Degree. He’d never used it, and decided that he was going to go for a Bachelor’s as well. If he buckled down, he could have it within a year and a half.

  “Have you heard anything?” I asked, speaking of his inheritance.

  “No,” he huffed. “Quit asking. I’ve already decided that I don’t give a shit. They can fight it as long as they want. They can even win. They can do whatever the hell makes them happy. Don’t mean shit to me.”

  “So you’re fine with it? I don’t need to go give anyone a piece of my mind?”

  He chuckled at that. “What are you gonna do, baby? Go beat them up?”

  “I might,” I said. “A few of them need it.”

  “Go ahead,” he laughed, kissing me. “Go beat the shit out of them.”

  He was teasing, but I’d actually considered it.

  While we were wrapped around each other, the back door opened and Marlowe and Lucas came out.

  “Hey!” she called. “Charles said y’all were going for a swim today. Mind if we join you?”

  “Fine with me,” Wally yelled.

  It was fine with me too until Nicole strolled out behind them. I tensed as she walked to the edge of the pool and dropped her bag. Her sunglasses were big, covering her eyes, making it hard to know if she even acknowledged me.

  Wally noticed my tension and looked over his shoulder. “Damn it,” he whispered and visibly became uncomfortable. He didn’t know what to do. Should he mention her? Should he pretend like everything was normal?

  “It’s fine,” I said, not wanting to give her the satisfaction. But it was awkward.

  Wally did a good job of ignoring her, but she still got him to laugh or speak by saying just the right things. It was obvious that they’d known each other for a long time and been a large part of each other’s lives. It pissed me off a little. She would no doubt be someone that I would have to see from time to time. What would I do? Would I be able to bury that? Pretend that I hadn’t seen her in bed with the man I was in love with?

  It was hard to say. I think even the most secure woman would have difficulty with that. She didn’t make it easy either. She had confidence and a careless attitude. Whatever had transpired between her and Wally, and, by association, me, didn’t affect her in the slightest.

  While Wally and the other guys congregated on the patio, I grabbed an inflatable raft and floated in the pool. I’d grabbed my sunglasses too, and pretended not to watch Nicole’s every move.

  She and Marlowe were sitting on the side, their legs hanging in the water. Their puppy had grown considerably and was running around the yard, inspecting bushes and claiming them.

  Nothing they were discussing was interesting and after a while, I felt myself begin to doze off. Before I fell completely asleep, Wally called my name.

  “Punks!” he yelled.

  “What?” I yelled back, annoyed that he’d roused me.

  “We’re about to head to the store. You wanna come?” He’d motioned to the group of guys, telling me that if I stayed, I’d be alone with only Marlowe and Nicole.

  I wanted to be strong. I wanted both of them to know that I was perfectly comfortable. “You go ahead,” I said.

  Wally hesitated. “You sure?”

  “Yeah. Bring me back some wine.”

  “Uh…alright,” he said. He started to follow the rest of the guys, but turned back and came for the pool. He was already dry, but stepped in and pulled my raft over to him. He didn’t say anything, only kissed me firmly on the lips.

  “You’re changing before you get in my car,” Lucas yelled.

  “Whipped!” Charles called.

  “Seriously,” Lucas added.

  “Please, like either of you assholes have room to talk,” he said as he pulled himself out.

  “Yeah,” Marlowe said. “Where’s my goodbye kiss?” She chuckled as Lucas ran over to her and kissed her, too.

  “Ugh,” Nicole said. “You’re all making me fucking sick.”

  “Oh, shut up,” Marlowe said.

  It wasn’t long after the guys left that Marlowe went inside to use the restroom. She left Nicole and me at the pool and I tried to pretend that I was asleep.

  A minute passed before she said, “You just gonna lay there?”

  I didn’t respond.

  “I mean, you don’t want to yell at me? Call me names? Cuss me out or something? Now’s your chance. No one else it out here.”

  I huffed but took a calming breath. She was trying to get a rise out of me.

  “Come on, Kristen,” she said. “I slept with Wally. Yell. Scream. Something.”

  That did it. I flung my hands, splashing the water, and sat up. “What the hell is your problem?” I asked. “Are you enjoying this? Do you like knowing that you hurt someone?”

  She jerked, as if I’d slapped her. “No,” she said quietly.

  “Then leave me alone. There isn’t anything I need to say to you.”

  We were silent, and I kept hoping that Marlowe or Wally would return to act as a buffer. I wasn’t that lucky.

  “I wasn’t trying to hurt you,” she said. “He told me that you weren’t together anymore. And… after you found us, he wouldn’t have anything to do with me. He wouldn’t talk to me. He wouldn’t look at me. We’ve always been friends, and there was never anything serious with us,
but after that…he didn’t want to be around me anymore. It sucked. I know it sucked for you too, but for different reasons. He used me to stop hurting over you.”

  She took a breath. Maybe hoping that I would say something, but I couldn’t think of anything. We sure as hell weren’t going to bond over this messed up ordeal.

  “He really does love you,” she said. “I just hope that we can get past it. I want to be his friend again. Just his friend. You two have something good and I don’t want to get in the middle of that. Ever.” She was quiet before meekly saying, “I’m not a bad person. And I’m…I’m sorry.”

  I wasn’t going to say that I was over it. I didn’t love her. I didn’t even like her, so forgiving her would be hard too. Instead, I said, “Let’s just stop talking about it. I don’t know when or if I’ll get over it, but reliving it doesn’t help.”

  “Right,” she said as Marlowe walked back outside. She was oblivious to our discussion and immediately began telling Nicole about a restaurant Lucas had taken her too.

  For the rest of the day, I was on edge. Wally could tell and overcompensated with affection. What I really wanted was Nicole to leave. Finally, she did and I went up to his room to go to sleep.

  On his bed were those same orange sheets. Something came over me and I ripped them off the bed, crumpled them into a ball, and threw them into the hallway.

  When he came up, he warily stepped around them. “What’s uh…were they dirty?…I just washed them.”

  “Burn them,” I blurted. His eyebrows shot up. “I can’t look at them Wally. Those are the sheets that I…that you and…”

  Abruptly he grabbed them and took off towards the stairs. He came back a few seconds later. “I threw them in the extra bedroom, but I’ll get rid of them tomorrow.”

  “Thank you,” I said.

  We turned off the lights and crawled onto the bed. Without sheets, the bare mattress was itchy and uncomfortable. An idea came to me then.

  “Go get those sheets,” I said. He hesitated, but did as I asked. As the night went on, I made certain that I’d never look at those sheets and think of Nicole again. They were sweaty and damp when we finished, but I’d taken back what was mine.