by Amy Starling
“Well, you can't call off the wedding now. We've already booked all the catering, the music, the bar. We got guests flying in from all over the country. My team will be there, taking shots of me walking you down the aisle. It'll be perfect.”
“But you're forcing us to get married. What if we don't want to?”
“You're pregnant now, and unfortunately, you have to accept the consequences of your actions.” His tone was curt. Business-like. “I simply can't abide my daughter running around pregnant without a husband. We're lucky the media hasn't gotten wind of your condition yet, or they'd have a field day.”
I rarely defied dad. Rachael was the one who got away with everything, not me. She could be a brat and they'd laugh at how cute she was. If I was too sarcastic, I'd get grounded as punishment. Now, even as an adult, I feared what would happen if I dared speak up.
“I'm not ready for this, dad. Max isn't either. It's not fair.”
He put an arm around me. “Anna, people go through arranged marriages all the time, and those seem to work out fine. I know you might not feel ready, but you're going to do okay.”
“But –”
“Fornication is a sin,” he continued. “You can't erase your mistakes, but you can help make it right. Think of this as your penance.”
“You're crazy.” I didn't mean to blurt it out, but there it was. “This is how people end up divorced, you know. They get married too soon, for horrible reasons. Pregnancy is not a good reason for marriage.”
For a moment I thought he was going to slap me. He'd done it before, up until the day I turned eighteen and fled to New York for school. His jaw clenched, and he bared his teeth like a dog about to bite.
“Listen here, missy. I will not have you humiliate me in front of everyone.”
“In front of who? Why are you so afraid what the church thinks about you?”
“I'm in the public eye now. I need everybody on my side I can get. A single word spoken ill about me, and whoever hears it just might turn to the competition with their vote.”
A car pulled into the driveway. It was Rachael, going so fast she almost skidded out of control.
“What if I don't show up to this wedding at all? What will you do about it?”
“Dang it, Anna. You're getting married to that baby's father on Saturday whether you like it or not. If you disobey me, then you're no daughter of mine.” He looked away. “It will be a shame to shut the farm down, but so be it.”
I gaped at him as Rachael jogged toward us. How could he be so cold and callous? He cared more about impressing others than what his own child wanted. If he wanted to disown me, then fine. I'd had about enough of this family anyway.
“Anna!” Rachael waved a stack of papers at me. “I really gotta talk to you.”
Dad glared as he stepped off the porch. “I'll leave you girls to it. Remember what I said, Anna, and choose wisely.”
I could barely stand to look at him as he put on a new fake smile for the camera. That whole cheery, bubbly side that he showed he world? It was just a show. Always had been. If only they saw him how he really was. Wonder how many people would vote for him then, the jerk!
Rachael didn't seem to notice the iciness between us. She shoved the papers in my face.
“Hey, c'mon.” I nudged her back. “What are you freaking out over? Calm down.”
“I've been worried about you and Max. I don't think you're right for each other.”
I laughed. “Try telling that to dad. He doesn't care who's right for me, only that I don't make him look stupid.”
She frowned. “If you marry Max, he is going to look stupid. This guy is trouble incarnate, and everyone knows it. Heck, it's even public record.”
I checked out the papers she'd handed me. At the top, it said “Waco Police Department.” Uh-oh.
“We always wondered how he got so much time off his job to visit Bastrop. Turns out he doesn't even have a job there anymore. He was fired.”
“What? How do you know this?”
“Detective work. I knew something was up with him, but couldn't put my finger on it. I just didn't want you getting into a mess.”
The report said he'd been arrested days before he arrived in Bastrop. It included a long list of charges, including driving while intoxicated, property damage, endangerment...
“Evidently, he was drinking on the job. He had some women riding in his truck who distracted him, causing the vehicle to go out of control. Went off road, hit some other car, messed a guy up bad.”
I turned the papers with trembling hands. “This can't be real. Max isn't like this.”
She rolled her eyes. “How do you know what he's like? You've only been with him for several months. If he's such a good guy, why didn't he tell you he'd been fired?”
I didn't have an answer. Okay, so this looked pretty bad.
She had a point; I didn't know him that well, despite living with him twenty-four seven these past few months. But he'd been so good to me – not to mention the amazing sex – that I chose to ignore his sordid history.
But what if that history was more than I could handle? I needed the truth. I needed to know he had changed, that he wasn't that irresponsible man-child anymore. Otherwise, no way could I marry him.
Even if it meant losing the farm. Even if it meant pissing off the family.
“That's not all. According to some guys from the bars he frequents, he would come in and leave with a new girl a few nights a week. Sometimes two of them.” She stuck out her tongue in disgust. “This happened right up until he met you. Do you really think he'll be happy settling down with you, one woman, for even a little while? I'd give it a week before he's out hunting for something new.”
Rachael's tirade filled me with doubt. I cared deeply for Max, and it was clear he had feelings of some sort for me. But he never talked about them. Never talked about our future, or what his plans were five years down the line. He always had been secretive, and that worried me.
“Oh, and this wasn't the first time he'd gotten tossed in the slammer. He's been in trouble for fighting multiple times, and there's one for possession of drugs.”
I didn't want to believe it. The sweet, thoughtful Max I thought I knew wasn't like that at all.
Was he?
“What's this I heard about drugs?”
Dad stood right behind me, looking mighty unhappy. Before I could tell Rachael to shut her mouth, she blabbed everything to him.
When dad had heard it all, he looked me over with a scowl. “How could you do this to me, Anna? You chose an alcoholic, druggie, criminal womanizer to be your baby's father?”
I grabbed the papers out of Rachael's hands and crumpled them up. “How could I do it to you? How do you think I feel? I had no idea about any of these things. I'm just as shocked as all of you.”
And once again, he was more interested in what this meant for himself than his daughter.
“I don't know what's worse: letting you run about pregnant with no husband, or dragging that boy into the public spotlight. If it comes out he's done these awful things after he's married you, it'll be bad for the family. Plus, he seems like the kind of guy who'll end up in the news sooner or later.”
“This is the sort of man you want her to marry, dad?” Rachael huffed. “We don't need this kind of scandal. I bet he'll be a deadbeat dad, too. He'll bail on you, Anna, and you'll never see a dime of child support.”
The pregnancy hormones had made me extra emotional lately, and I burst into tears right in front of them. Neither made a move to console me.
“Stop saying that. You haven't given him a chance.”
“He's had plenty of chances. You just want to believe he's changed into a new man for you, don't you? Like you're so special, like you're the one to tame him when no other woman could.”
I stopped crying. She was jealous! Was that the reason she'd done all this?
“The wedding can't be called off, like I said. There's just too much invested at this
point.” He paced, his hands behind his back. “But to have you marry a loser like him could be bad for us all.”
“He's not a loser.”
“Then what do you call this?”
Dad held up his hand. “Perhaps there's a solution. You can marry someone else.”
I cried again – this time from laughter. Had he lost his marbles?
“Oh, yeah? Who would that someone be?”
“There's a wonderful young man who works in my law office back in California. His name is Henry Lane. He's handsome, hard-working, good head on his shoulders. Comes from a very prominent family with a respectable name. And best of all, he's Catholic. You won't see him running around getting drunk and sleeping with prostitutes.”
It took a moment for it to sink in. When it finally did, I was horrified.
“You're suggesting I get married to a guy I've never even met?”
“I know him quite well, and he would be a fine husband. He's told me he's looking to settle down, and I've mentioned you to him many times.” He drummed his fingers on the porch railing. “With a bit of compensation, perhaps he'd agree to marry you in spite of your having another man's child.”
“No way. I'm not doing that.” I stared sadly at the empty spot where the RV used to be. “The only one I want is Max.”
Rachael snorted. “Are you deluding yourself? You seriously think he's coming back? My bet is, he used you while he got better, then he packed it up and flew back home to freedom fast as he could. He has no reason to get involved in this circus.”
She was right; he had no real reason. But then why did he call me daily to ask me how he was doing, and to say how much he missed me?
“I have an idea,” dad said. “You claim Max has changed, that he's no longer the pathetic shell of a man he used to be. Well, let's have him prove it.”
“Prove it?”
He nodded. “I'll pay to have a bachelor party thrown for him in Waco. The party will be a test for him. If he passes, I'll give him a chance. The public does love stories about reformed criminals.”
“And what if he doesn't?”
“Then you'll be marrying someone else.”
I wouldn't be marrying anyone at all if I packed a bag and ran away to Mexico. I'd had enough of this family drama. Let Rachael be the do-no-wrong princess. I wanted no part of this nonsense.
“Fine,” I muttered. “Do what you want.”
He went off to deal with the camera people, leaving me and Rachael alone.
“I thought you'd be more grateful, Anna. I spent my time digging up this info for your sake.”
“For my sake, right. Now dad thinks Max is criminal scum.”
“You didn't want to marry him anyway.”
But I did. No matter what he'd done, despite the fighting and drinking and getting into trouble, I still wanted him and no one else. No other man had ever taken such care of me, or made me feel so cherished.
I had to admit it: I was in love with the guy. And I hoped, with all my might, that he felt the same way.
“He's a good man. I know he is. This test of dad's will prove it.”
God, how I prayed I was right.
Chapter 19 - Max
After the accident, confined to the wheelchair and isolated in Bastrop, it felt like I'd entered another world.
Gone was the fast living I had been used to for so long. Gone were the bars, the late nights out, the drinking, the beautiful but brainless ladies.
At first, there was a hole inside my soul. Those things were my world, my comfort, all I knew. To have them ripped away so suddenly hurt like hell.
Then Anna found me, and not having that stuff didn't hurt so much anymore. She was nothing like the girls I chased after.
Didn't take long to realize she was perfect for me.
Now I was back in Waco, and there was a hole in me again – because that old life no longer held any appeal. This new life, the possibility of a future with her stretched out before me, had me both terrified and amazed.
“You need my hand, Max? I'm here if you have trouble.”
Jayce stood behind me as I struggled to climb the stairs. Walking was still uncomfortable, and my legs wobbled and refused to work now and again. But I hated sitting in that chair and I'd be damned if I would ever get back in it again.
“I'm fine.” My foot caught beneath a cement step, and I nearly fell. “Just a few more to go.”
I hadn't been inside my apartment since the day I left on that trip. With my legs finally functioning, I was free to return – and stay, if I liked. Nobody could force me back to Bastrop. I could be free of the Southwells and the web of lies I'd helped weave.
Except Anna wouldn't let me stay here. When I waved goodbye to her and drove away this morning, she looked so sad.
She didn't believe I'd come back. I saw the doubt in her eyes.
Being doubted, not being trusted by her, was more painful than any broken bone.
Well, I'd show her. I'd do whatever it took to earn that trust.
“Your face is turning real red.” Jayce fumbled with my suitcase. “You're making me nervous.”
I ignored him and hauled myself up the final step. On the landing, I plopped down, breathing hard and full of joy at my victory.
“Told you I could do it.”
He laughed. “You always were the most determined of us.”
“Man, it's good to be home.” I thrust the copper key into the familiar lock. “I've been away so long, it feels like a dream, almost.”
This might have been my home, yeah, but then why didn't I feel at home here anymore?
When I shoved open the squeaky door and stepped into my mess of an apartment, laundry strewn about the couch and dishes in the sink where I'd left them, I just felt sad.
Jayce set my bag down and sighed. “This place always smells like a mix of smoke and Indian food. Brings back memories.”
“Blame the lady downstairs for the latter.”
He opened the fridge and winced. “I guess whatever food you got in there's way past its prime.”
I was too busy letting my feelings eat me up inside to worry about rotten food. In Bastrop, I never intended to leave Anna. I promised her I would help, I'd be her pretend boyfriend to get her out of trouble.
Now here I was, set to marry her when I thought I'd never get hitched in my life. It would have been very easy to stay here and forget my promise. That I was tempted, even for a second, made me nervous.
Jayce patted me on the shoulder. “Hey, I'm worried about you. You haven't been the same since Hank let you go.”
I sighed. “Ya think? The station was my life. That was the only purpose I knew.”
“Maybe it wouldn't hurt to find a new purpose.” He dragged his hand over the thick layer of dust on the counter. “You lived with Anna for months. Whenever I talked to you on the phone, you sounded so happy, like a weight was lifted off you.”
“Is that so?”
The cloud of dust made him sneeze. “You're, ah, going back there, aren't you? I mean, you're here now. You could stay. It'd be like old times.”
When I thought of how I used to be, collecting women's phone numbers and bedding one after the other, I felt a stab of regret.
“Not so sure I want things how they used to be.”
Jayce and I sat together on the couch. I put on a football game on the TV. Back in the day, we'd always watch the game together while getting smashed out of our minds. With his family, he couldn't do that anymore.
“Now you understand what I was telling you, don't you?” He spoke gently. Patiently. “I can see it in your eyes. You really do care about Anna.”
I used to smack the guys for teasing me about having feelings for one of my conquests. This time, I didn't bother to deny it.
“Yeah, I do. Think I might be in love with her, whatever that means.” My stomach turned. “But I feel awful. There's so much confusion, so many thoughts competing in my brain, I can't think.”
Figured Jayce
would rip on me for admitting my feelings, but nope. He was a new man now. He'd grown up.
I didn't want to admit it when he got married, but Elle changed him for the better.
Just like Anna did for me.
“Do you care enough to marry her?”
I let out a weak, pained laugh. “Please don't ask me that.”
“But you're out of time. The two of you invented this crazy story, and now what can you do? You could walk away and tell everyone the truth. Leave her to deal on her own. You don't owe her anything.”
My jaw clenched. “I owe her everything. She was an angel, taking care of my pathetic ass while I moped around for months doing nothing. She's too good to me.”
“You ever consider maybe she's too good for you?”
I glared at him, ready to push him off the couch – then realized he was right.
“Think about it. Not so long ago, you admitted you'd never settle down. The idea sickened you.”
“Then I met her.”
“She's a sweet, innocent girl. Look at you, and the bad things you've done.” He counted on his fingers. “You got fired – from more than one job. Arrested multiple times. Done every drug known to man. Ignored responsibilities to party instead. Slept with more girls than you can remember.”
“Shut up! You don't think I know what a dick I've been?”
His eyebrow raised. “Yeah, but are you still that same dick? You've done some not-very-admirable things, Max. If you don't put that side of you in the past for good, you're gonna cause this woman a lot of pain.”
That was part of what frightened me. I always thought Anna deserved a nice guy – the type who helped old ladies cross the street, who went to church and didn't drink too much and didn't think about screwing her pretty much every minute of the day.
That's what she deserved, and yet I still wanted her for myself.
Jayce was right, though. To be with her meant I'd give up the bachelor lifestyle. Could I really handle it, or was that too much a part of me to forsake?
“And what would you do if you did have a relationship with her? You told me you hated the country. Always whined about how boring it was there.”
“I... I don't know. I can't do a long-distance thing. The thought of being away from her, of us living so far apart, makes me want to punch a hole in the wall.”