The Perfect Illusion

by Winter Renshaw

  “I’m not embarrassed,” she says, crossing her arms across her fake tits. “I just don’t understand why everyone’s so head over heels in love with this girl who’s clearly hiding something.”

  I chuckle, downing the rest of my juice before rinsing it in the sink. “And what makes you think she’s hiding something, Detective?”

  Audrina throws her hands in the air, fists clenched as she moans. “God, it’s like I’m the only person in this entire fucking house with their feet rooted in some semblance of reality.”

  “Not true.” I step closer to her, peering down my nose. “You’re just bitter, Audrina. You’re bitter that it’s not you I’m marrying, and you’re comparing yourself to her because you’re insecure. You’ve always been insecure. It’s one of the many, many reasons we’ve always been all wrong for each other.”

  Her jaw hangs, lashes fluttering as she tries to form a response, only Mari shuffles in from around the corner.

  “Morning, gorgeous.” I slip my arm around her, kissing her forehead.

  “Ugh.” Audrina waves her hand at us before spinning on her heel and all but stomping off.

  “What’s that about?” Mari asks.

  “You’re not going to fucking believe this,” I say, dragging my hand along my smirking mouth. “She thinks you’re pregnant.”

  Mari’s expression fades, turning to ash. I can only imagine how embarrassing it would be for her if my family believed the only reason I was marrying her was because she was pregnant and not because we’re “madly in love.” Not that it’s the 1950s and those types of things are frowned upon, but because no one likes to be accused of something that isn’t true.

  It boils down to respect.

  And ensuring Mari is comfortable during her stay here—not the brunt of Audrina’s jealous rage.

  “I set her straight,” I say, slipping my hands around her waist and pulling her body against mine. “She’s trying to figure out why we’re in such a rush to get married, and apparently that’s the only thing that makes sense to her.”

  “She’s still in love with you.” Mari’s eyes search mine, though I’m not sure what she’s looking for.

  Shrugging, I roll my eyes. “And?”

  “And she’s not going to give you up that easily. That’s the impression I get anyway,” Mari says. “She wants to make this difficult for us.”

  “Let her. There’s nothing she can say or do to derail this.”

  Chapter 25

  Mari

  “First time sailing, Mari?” Conrad inspects the lines of his boat, apparently named Seas the Day, as Duke wrangles the flapping sails Monday morning.

  “It is.” I shield my eyes from the sun as Hudson steps on then turns to offer me his hand.

  Audrina’s seated a few feet away, next to Alec, paging aimlessly through this month’s issue of Harper’s Bazaar. She’s wearing oversized, pitch-black sunglasses but I’m almost positive she’s rolling her eyes.

  “Where are your boat shoes?” she asks, glancing up from a glossy editorial. “You can’t walk around in those sandals. You’re going to slip.”

  “She’ll be fine,” Alec says. “Hud’ll take care of her.”

  Hudson takes me by the elbow, and I glance around, noting the lack of seating aside from the captain’s seats toward the middle. Leading me around the massive jib, we take a seat across from Audrina and Alec and wait for Helena and Cybil to make their grand entrance.

  “We’re going to be here all day if I don’t lend a hand. Excuse me, Mari. I’ll be back.” Hudson joins his father and Duke, leaving me alone with my baby’s father and his sister.

  “You nervous at all?” Alec asks, squinting into the sun.

  “No,” I say. “Should I be?”

  “Yes,” Audrina huffs, biting a hidden smirk.

  Alec nudges her. “No. Some people just get nervous on these. You’re out on the open water, nothing but a life jacket and some flimsy railings keeping you safe. If you’re not used to it, it might be scary.”

  “I have a feeling Conrad’s done this hundreds of times,” I say, turning to watch him tying some fancy knot on the other end of the vessel.

  “He has.” Alec nods. “He’s an old pro. He and my father used to race these things in their younger days. That’s how they met.”

  The wind picks up, sending the sailcloth flapping and drowning out our conversation, so Alec moves closer, taking Hudson’s seat.

  “Are you into sailing?” I ask.

  His lips purse and he hesitates before shaking his head. “I get so fucking seasick on these things it’s unreal, but it’s just once a year, so I deal.”

  “Well that’s gracious of you.”

  He smirks, revealing a set of dimples, and I can’t help but to picture our child with the same ones.

  “I try.” He shrugs before pulling the Ray-Bans from his shirt collar and slipping them on.

  Glancing toward Hudson, I catch him watching us, his eyes flicking back and forth between what he’s doing and what we’re doing.

  “How long do you think we’ll be out on the water?” I ask.

  “All fucking day,” Audrina chimes in, licking her index finger before flipping a page in her magazine.

  “Most of the day,” Alec says. “It’s not that bad, just work on your tan or something. It’ll be over before you know it.”

  “I’m not trying to rush the experience, I was just curious,” I say. “I’m actually excited. This is all brand new to me.”

  “The newness will wear off by noon,” he says. “Trust me.”

  “Maybe.” I shrug. “Maybe not.”

  “We’re here, we’re here,” Helena announces, waving as her Lilly Pulitzer swimsuit cover up flounces in the wind. Cybil is a step behind her, carrying a large canvas tote packed full of food and drinks.

  Hudson peers over at us again, unsmiling, and as soon as he’s finished checking his line, he returns to my side, slipping his hand in mine. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he’s jealous that I’m talking to Alec.

  Sliding his phone from his pocket, Alec begins tapping the screen.

  “No phones,” Audrina says. “We’re on vacation.”

  Alec huffs, ignoring her.

  “What’s more important than spending time with your sister and your best friend and his lovely fiancée?” She overemphasizes lovely, and I shoot her a look as my blood begins to heat. She’s lucky we’re in front of all these people and I’m too polite to make a scene.

  “I’m checking on my flight,” Alec says, chin tucked as he scrolls the screen.

  “Where are you headed?” I ask.

  “Hong Kong,” he says. “I leave in two days.”

  “You’re not staying the whole month like everyone else?” My heart races, and I’m speaking too fast. This isn’t good. I thought I’d have more time with him … more time before I had to tell him.

  “No, no.” He chuckles. “I don’t do that. I work for a living, unlike … five-eighths of the people on this boat.”

  “Oh.” My throat constricts, and I make a mental list of all the things I need to do and say before he leaves. On top of that, I have no idea when—or if—I’m going to be alone with him at any point in the coming days. “How long will you be in Hong Kong?”

  He dims his screen before slipping the phone back in his pocket.

  “Five, maybe six months?” he asks. “It all depends. Could be shorter, could be longer. I’m planning for six though.”

  I’m due in seven.

  “So do you just stay there the whole time and work, or do you ever get to come home?” I ask.

  “Mari, what’s with all the questions?” Hudson squeezes my hand, chuckling.

  “Just making conversation,” I say, clearing my throat. My cheeks warm as I realize how bizarre my line of questioning must have seemed to Hudson, but my mind was spinning so fast with panic I didn’t have time to think about how this would look.

  “Hud, it’s fine,” Alec says.
“I can come home from time to time, yes. But I prefer not to. I like to immerse myself in the culture and work as much as possible until the job’s done. Sooner I’m done, sooner I can move on to the next job.”

  “My brother, the hustler.” Audrina’s words are coated in sarcasm. She folds her magazine and tosses it aside. “Mom and Dad’s pride and joy.”

  Alec’s sandy hair blows in the breeze as the boat begins to move, and he hooks his arms around his tan legs. He’s attractive. Well-educated—I assume. Hardworking. And adventurous. It’s almost as if I hit the genetic lottery of sperm donors.

  “Alec, I need you to ease the sheets,” Duke calls into the wind, and Alec obliges.

  Hudson slips his arm around me as the boat leans. I wish I could enjoy the sweet simplicity of the wind at the sails and the smell of the ocean breeze, but all I can think about is how I’m going to get Alec alone between now and Wednesday.

  All I need is a minute of his time.

  And then I need to hope and pray he doesn’t run and tell Hudson before I get the chance.

  Fuck.

  Chapter 26

  Hudson

  “You were all about Alec today.” I’m perched on the edge of Mari’s bed in her suite as she changes for bed Monday evening.

  Glancing up into the dresser mirror, her eyes catch my reflection and she laughs.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” she asks.

  “It’s like you found every little thing he said or did fascinating.” I lean back, slipping my hands under my head and staring up at the walnut-stained beams that accent the vaulted ceiling. “He’s not that fascinating. Trust me.”

  “Sensing a little jealousy over there.”

  Yeah.

  I was fucking jealous today, and I’m not the jealous type.

  “I don’t get jealous,” I say. “But today … yeah … seeing you so engaged with Alec … it did something to me.”

  Turning, she comes to the bed, climbing in and lying down beside me. Resting on her side, she places her hand under her chin and smiles.

  “That’s cute,” she says. “Do you think I have a crush on Alec?”

  Her eyes search mine, and I hesitate. “A crush? Like a schoolyard crush?”

  “I feel like you think that.” Mari bites her bottom lip.

  “Does it matter if I think that?”

  She rolls her eyes. “Yeah, it does. Because you shouldn’t care.”

  “You’re right. I shouldn’t care,” I say. “But I do.”

  “Then stop caring.”

  “It’s not that easy.” I look away, pulling in a deep breath and letting it go. “I like spending time with you, Mari. I thought it would feel like work, like a job. But it doesn’t. It’s effortless. I’ve never had that with anyone else.”

  “Hudson, stop.” She chuckles, rolling to her back and folding her hands over her upper stomach.

  The two of us lie in silence for a minute, staring at the ceiling, deep in thought.

  “This is a job,” she says a moment later. “This isn’t real. It may feel real from time to time, but that’s because we’re good actors. It’s easy to get caught up in this, but we … just can’t.”

  “Why not?”

  “Why not?” she repeats the question as if it astounds her.

  “Yeah,” I say. “Why can’t we get caught up in this? If it feels right, maybe it is right?”

  “It’s not right,” she says. “A month ago, Hudson, I couldn’t stand you. I literally hated your guts, and I almost spat in your coffee one morning. You’re lucky Tiffin from HR walked in when she did.”

  I shake my head, rubbing my thumb and forefinger along my eyes.

  “I probably deserved it,” I say.

  “You did deserve it.” I feel her turn my way. “I’m having fun with you, Hudson. More than I thought I would. But we’re not together, not in the real sense of the word. Only on paper. And for the record, I do not have a crush on Alec. I think he’s nice. That’s all.”

  I fight the pleased smile trying to claim my lips and reach for her, pulling her over my lap until she’s straddling my hips.

  “What are you doing?” she asks as our fingers interlace. “You’re really bad at taking ‘no’ for an answer.”

  “So you’re saying you don’t want to be with me?” I ask. “If there was no contract and all we had was the last few weeks …”

  “Don’t play the ‘what if’ game.”

  “Yes or no, Mari. Just answer the fucking question.”

  She rolls her eyes, biting her lower lip as she stares at the ceiling. “I don’t know.”

  “You do know. You just don’t want to say.”

  “I think we’re having fun pretending, and we’re not thinking of the reality of this,” she says.

  “Which is what?”

  “I don’t belong in your world, and I probably never will,” she says, her gaze falling to mine. “And I’m fine with that. I just don’t think we have much in common other than enjoying each other’s company.”

  “Isn’t that the only thing that matters?” I ask.

  My hands release hers before settling on her hips and sliding down her outer thighs. A thin silk camisole covers her bra-less breasts, and while I’ve been trying to be a perfect gentleman and not stare at the pointed buds piercing the pale fabric, I still know they’re there, and my hands are aching at the thought of touching them.

  “You’re trying to find every excuse you can not to let yourself fall for me, Maribel,” I say, my voice soft and low as my fingers graze the soft flesh of her belly. “I’m sure I could come up with a list myself if I tried, but I don’t want to do that. All I want, Mari, is you.”

  Her expression fades, and she’s still concentrating.

  “I’m falling for you,” I say, as if it weren’t already obvious.

  “You’re making a big mistake.” Her voice is a cracked whisper.

  Sitting up, I pull her closer into my lap, wrapping her legs around my lower back before cupping her pretty face in my hand.

  “Do you want to be with me?” I ask. “Logic and rationale aside?”

  I hear her swallow and watch as her tongue skims her bottom lip before she nods.

  “Yes.” Mari sighs.

  My heart hammers in my chest as I claim her mouth, and my hands tug at the hem of her top, all but tearing it off of her.

  Falling back onto the bed, she lays on my chest, sliding her hands down my stomach then farther, beneath my waistband, until she palms my throbbing cock. Sliding down my body, she unzips my shorts, freeing me and taking me in her mouth, inch by inch.

  Her tongue slides around my tip before she teases the length again and again.

  My body is reeling, every inch of me alive as she pleasures me.

  “I knew you had a mouth on you, Mari, but fuck.” I’m breathless, cock growing harder by the second.

  She stops, staring up at me with a drunk-in-lust smirk before going back for more.

  Mari licks and sucks and swirls until I can’t take it any more, bringing me to the brink and back more times than I can stand, and when I’ve had enough torture, I reach for her and pull her over top of me. She giggles, pulling my shirt over my head before pressing her body against mine.

  Her bare breasts are warm on my skin, and the faint scent of gardenia evaporates into the briny air around us.

  Tugging at her shorts, I ease them down her hips until she rises and kicks them off. Straddling me, her wet pussy glides against my cock.

  “You’re all about tormenting me tonight, aren’t you?” I tease.

  “It’s the least I could do after all the ways you tormented me the last couple of months,” she says, hips circling.

  “What can I say? I like being in charge.”

  “You think you’re in charge now?” She laughs, grinding harder.

  Reaching into my shorts, I retrieve my wallet and slide out a spare condom.

  “You’re going to fuck me,” I say, voice low. “You
’re going to come all over my cock, and I’m going to watch.”

  Handing her the condom, I slip my hands behind my head and let her do the honors.

  “You get off on this, don’t you?” she asks, sliding the rubber down my shaft as slow as humanly fucking possible.

  “I get off on beautiful women named Maribel fucking me, yes,” I say.

  She rises on her knees, my cock in her pretty little hand. “And what if I don’t? What if I change my mind?”

  “Are you thinking of not fucking me tonight?”

  Mari’s lips crack into a coy smile. She doesn’t answer.

  “Fuck me,” I say. “Before that busy little brain of yours talks you out of it.”

  My hands grip her hips, guiding her over my cock, and she slides herself down, aided by the warm slickness of her arousal.

  This woman is Novocain.

  I’m numb when I’m with her, but in the best way possible.

  Nothing else matters when I’m with her … the past, the future, none of it. There’s a world outside that door full of obligations, heartache, and strife, but in here, it’s just the two of us. Nothing more, nothing less.

  Mari lowers herself again, deeper before rising on her knees and building herself to a steady rhythm. Her eyes close, and her head leans back as her hands massage her swollen breasts. They’re bigger than I remember from before, but it could be the lighting or my tired eyes playing ticks on me. Either way, I’ll fucking take it.

  Thrusting up, I fill her with every last inch of me, watching as her mouth releases a quiet gasp and her eyes squeeze tighter.

  I could do this all night with her, every night.

  And after this?

  I think I will.

  Chapter 27

  Mari

  A small golden conch shell digs into the palm of my hand Tuesday morning just after sunrise. Up ahead, a man jogs along the shore, growing closer until he comes into focus, and then I realize ...

  It’s Alec.