Changing Lanes (Highway 17 #1)

by Leaona Luxx

  “All this time, you never knew me. I’ve been as broken as you have, and I’ve told you I’m sorry but no more. Hell no,” he says quietly.

  “You’re the one that struck a deal with the devil. So, if you don’t mind telling me, how the fuck did you get hurt?” I drop my arms to my side with my fists shaking.

  “Don’t you just know it all. What the fuck? You corner the market in being hurt? Get your fucking head on straight, you know how this went down. You got hurt, and I got used to doing the dirty stuff.” His eyes soften but I don’t.

  “Did you leave with the check?” asking as I put my hands on my hips. “Did you?” I demand.

  “Yes.” He doesn’t even look ashamed.

  “Exactly. You wanted the money, so you planned the entire thing.” Shaking my head, I feel so cheap.

  “That’s all you know, isn’t it? Thanks for the fuck.” Looking disgusted, he walks away, never looking back.

  Here I am, walking away again. Why do I always do the opposite of what I know to be right? She drives me insane with the condescending way she speaks to me. She turned out just like her father. I’m glad I got out when I did.

  I wanted to be the one to tell Torrie about Andi. There’s more than just I’m a father involved, but in true Torrie fashion, she thinks she knows it all. The look on her face when I told her I wasn’t married was priceless. That’s what she gets for being a know it all.

  I do my best to put Torrie out of my head on my drive home, but it doesn’t do any good. Walking in the house, I toss the mail on the table. Bent over the back of the chair, I bow my head to try to shake off this mood. I don’t hear her walk in but I smell her perfume and wait for the questions to start.

  “Are you leaving with her?” Her tone alone crawls up my back. Like any of this is her business.

  “Are you kidding me with this shit?” I’m over her controlling ways.

  “Have you fucked her yet?” Ava unleashes on me.

  “First, is Andi home?” I scan the room for her backpack.

  “She’s outside, I’m just dropping her off.” She sits down without being asked.

  “There’s not one thing you have asked me that is any of your business.” Walking over to the sink, I get a glass of water. Taking a few deep breaths, I do my best to calm down.

  She folds her arms over her chest. “Her rich dad offer to pay you off again?”

  “No. Besides, you know I’d never take it,” telling her as I rub the side of my face, I’m aggravated.

  “You’re right, I know you better than anyone else. You need to remember that.” She comes over to stand beside me. “Andi is your life now, she has to come first,” Ava reminds me as if I’ve forgotten.

  “I think that’s advice we can both benefit from, don’t you?” I retort. Her face turns red, she’s fuming.

  “I’ve always loved you. I’ve never hurt you.” She storms out the door.

  What the fuck did I ever do? I fell in love. I’ve made mistakes. I’ve spent my life making up for my past. It’s about damn time I have a future. I call for Andi to come do her homework and start dinner. Mom comes in just after I get things rolling.

  “Hey, baby.” She kisses Andi on the head.

  “Hi, Gamma. Mom picked me up today, she took me for ice cream.” She smiles at mom.

  “That’s nice. Brannon, what’s for dinner?” She pats me on the back as she walks by.

  “Spaghetti. I’m ready to eat and fall into bed,” I explain without looking at her.

  “Tough day?” She stirs the sauce while I cut vegetables for a salad.

  “Yeah, but nothing I don’t deserve,” I say as I get the plates down.

  “Hold on one minute here, you’re a good man. You’ve done more since you were fourteen than most men their entire life. You be proud of who you are because we are.” She begins to tear up.

  “Mom, I’m not a good man. I did all these things because I had to, it was my penance. Had I not made the mistakes, I wouldn’t have had to correct them.” She moves closer to me, laying her hand on my face.

  “Some wouldn’t bother to correct their mistakes.” She lays her hand over my heart. “You’ve paid enough. It’s time to heal your heart.” Andi runs over, wrapping her arms around my waist as my mom hugs me. I’m blessed.

  Once we eat and the kitchen is cleaned, I go to bed early. I am tired. The last few weeks have kept me awake at night, and the stress is starting to get to me. Although I’m in bed, there’s no sleep. I toss and turn until three in the morning. Deciding to get up, I check on Andi as I pass her room.

  Tugging my coat on, I walk out to the barn. Climb up the ladder, I lay back in the fresh straw for a little while, thinking.

  Sitting up, I take out my old lock box, opening it up to reveal my prized possessions. In it, things from my past. Reaching in, I move Andi’s baby picture. Lying under my dad’s obituary, I find it. Taking it out, I unfold the paper, staring at it for hours. So much I should’ve done differently is wrapped up in this one piece of paper.

  Putting the box away, I shove the paper in my pocket. I’ll put it in my wallet later, I want it on me in case I need it. I put it there ten years ago, only taking it out when I wanted to remember her. The things we shared and what could’ve been.

  Walking back to the house, I decide to take Andi out for breakfast, I wake her early. “Mornin’, baby girl. Would you like to go for breakfast with Dad?”

  She smiles, melting away my worries. “Yes, I’m starving.”

  “Let’s hurry and get dressed. We don’t want to be late for school.”

  We go over her spelling words again on the way to the restaurant, she’s a smart little cookie. Even if I have to say so myself. She asks about my work, happy I’m getting a chance to work. We talk about summer break, making plans to camp out in the yard and to build the biggest sandcastle at the beach.

  Parking, we walk into the restaurant hand in hand. Several watch as we enter, she’s too much. Her ponytail swings as she walks with her white tennis shoes and green polka dot dress. Sitting near a window, we people-watch until we place our order. Andi orders orange juice with her pancakes, I ask the waitress to bring some milk also.

  Andi sits up straight then suddenly, she bolts from the table. I run after her, I can’t believe she’s doing this. She never acts this way, where is she going? “Andi. Stop.” Out the door she goes, right into the arms of my favorite blonde.

  “Hey, pretty girl. How are you?” Torrie hugs her.

  “I’m good. My Dad and I are having pancakes, come eat with us,” she says. Torrie glances up at me.

  My eyes move from her tank top that’s gapped open to her eyes and back. I feel like a teenage boy, I can’t stop looking. She begins to shake her head, drawing my attention again.

  “What?” I ask, clearly embarrassed.

  “You. I guess there is one thing you like more than money,” she says, still holding Andi’s hand.

  “You would guess right but only on one specific person.” Moving my eyes from hers to her chest.

  “Will you have breakfast with us, please?” Andi asks again.

  “Nice, you put her up to it?” Torrie narrows her eyes.

  “No, I did not. As a matter of fact, she’s in a little bit of trouble for running off like she did.” I shake my finger at Andi.

  “I’m sorry. I saw my friend, I wanted to ask if she would eat with us,” Andi explains.

  “Your friend?” Tilting my head in question.

  “Yes. You’re my friend, aren’t you Torrie?” Andi has her wrapped already. Torrie looks at her sweetly.

  “I am, but I’m not sure we should have breakfast together. Maybe your mom will want to come?” Torrie tries to make an excuse, it won’t work.

  “My mom doesn’t come around a lot. It’s always me and my dad. Unless Gamma comes, but she didn’t today,” Andi explains as her sweet face frowns.

  “It’s okay, sweetie. I’m sure Torrie has important things to do. We’re fine, y
ou don’t have to,” I say with a smirk.

  “You know what, I do have time for breakfast after all. Lead the way, Andi.” Torrie holds the door open for them, and I grab it as she walks through.

  Sitting across from each other, Torrie is beside Andi. They chat about school, her teachers, and how she’s doing in her classes. It’s more than her own mother has ever done. They eat, sharing pancakes and fruit. Andi drinks milk, and Torrie drinks Andi’s orange juice.

  “Who did your hair this morning?” Torrie twirls Andi’s ponytail.

  “My Dad. He does everything for me,” Andi boasts.

  “Oh, he does.” Torrie eyes me skeptically.

  “I try to, but I tend to let important people down when I’m needed most.” She glances at me but has her full attention on Andi.

  “Dad had a friend named Torrie in college, he said she was beautiful. Is my friend Torrie beautiful, too?” Andi asks innocently. Torrie faces me, her eyes are glassy.

  “Andi, this is my friend from college.” Torrie smiles, but it’s weak, forced even.

  “Oh, she’s prettier than you said she was.” I choke on my coffee. Shit.

  “Thank you, Andi. I think I should be going.” Torrie stands as she pins me with her eyes, she looks angry.

  Andi walks with Torrie outside while I pay for our food. I know she’s pissed, I can’t believe this shit. I watch them through the window, Torrie ties Andi’s shoe. She knows how, why is she having her do it?

  “Okay, ladies. Thank you for having breakfast with us.” I’m hoping she doesn’t smack me.

  “You’re welcome. Andi, I hope you have a great day. Could you give me a minute with your dad?” She’s gonna hit me.

  “Okay, see you later.” Andi waves bye to Torrie and climbs in the truck.

  “Thank you, sincerely,” I offer.

  “You know something? You are lower than low. Having your daughter say those things, I can’t believe you.” Her face turns red as she talks, she’s angry.

  “I can see where you’d think I set this up, but you’re giving me more credit than I deserve.” I try to smooth this over.

  “You’re right, I am. We both know if there’s no money involved, you’re not interested.” She hits below the belt.

  Stepping toward her, I lean in ever so little. “You could’ve said no.”

  “You didn’t deserve me.” Her words are like venom, she’s also right there.

  “No, I don’t guess I didn’t. I didn’t have enough money, even after the check. Guess daddy doesn’t think you’re worth it.” Fuck, she makes me mad.

  She stares at me for a moment, narrowing her eyes into slits. “Apparently, he isn’t the only one.” Her voice drips with disdain.

  “Don’t. You had every fucking chance to make this right, too, but you didn’t.” Her blue eyes fill with tears.

  “No, I didn’t. I guess that should tell us something.” She steps around me, walking away.

  Damn it. She’s never gonna forgive, I can forget it. I need to find a way we can work around this because obviously, we’ll never get over it.

  I drop Andi off at school fifteen minutes late. After a quick trip to the job site, I decide to drive over to the office, I don’t want to go back home. I’m not in the mood for farm work. I’m not in the mood for shit.

  Walking through the front office, I knock on One’s door to get his attention. He holds up one finger, signaling he’s on the phone. I step back into the front office, sitting by the window. I immediately start thinking of her.

  “Hey, man. What’s up?” One says as he walks in, slapping me on the leg.

  “Torrie. What the fuck am I supposed to do with her?” Shaking my head, I stare at the floor.

  “Women are odd creatures, Brannon. It’s not hard to give them want they want, it’s hard figuring out what that is,” he replies, checking his phone.

  Snapping my head up, I say to him, “Excuse me, but what in the hell are you talking about?”

  He laughs at me. “Women.”

  “No shit,” I answer.

  “Brannon, when I met Hadlea, she was broken. Such an amazing woman, yet she didn’t know her own worth. As much as I wanted to convince her she was everything, my everything, I couldn’t. She had to learn it herself.” One sits up in his chair.

  “She’s so mad. I don’t think she’ll ever get over it. I’d be happy if we could just work together without shedding blood. At least it would be a start.” Dropping my head, I rub my eyes in frustration.

  “Time. I know you just found each other again, but you need time.” One stands, patting me on the back.

  “I don’t expect us to pick up where we dropped off, but I do expect us to be civil. She thinks she’s the only one who’s hurt.” Turning to him, I just say how I feel. “She acts like my heart didn’t get broken.”

  “Sometimes, it’s hard to see past your own hurt. Hadlea couldn’t, she even thought she was saving me from it.” One tries to help me understand.

  If I could erase Torrie’s hurt, I would. In a New York minute, as she says. Had I known she was still broken, I would’ve tried anything to help her. I will now if she’ll let down her walls so I can get close enough. “I’m not sure what it’s gonna take short of a miracle.” If loving someone isn’t miracle enough, I don’t know what is.

  Can’t I just stay away from him? I knew better than to have breakfast with them. The glutton for punishment I am, I just sit right on down. Having his daughter say those things to me, how did he plan it? What’s worse, I loved being with them.

  Our short time together was more meaningful than any other thing I’ve done. Maybe because I did it with my whole heart, I’m not sure. What I do know for certain, I’ve never been the same. Brannon changed me, I’m better because of what happened.

  I’ve lived ten years blaming him for something I’m not even sure took place. Why do we do those things? Harbor resentment? Not talk to someone because we find them guilty without knowing all the story. Looking back, I should’ve talked to him. My father is capable of so many things, he could have very well manipulated this entire thing. I know he orchestrated it, but what if he skewed the evidence?

  Once you close your heart, it’s proven to be the hardest thing to reopen. The love you’ve felt turns into something you’d prefer to never feel again.

  Why? The bravest thing we can do is love. We’re taught to use our brain for everything, even love. We deduce what may or will hurt us, then we stop ourselves from the action. Matters of the heart are complicated, by our own hands.

  Betrayal consumed me, told my heart to be silent. He has always been there, waiting. I turn a blind eye to my father’s treachery while burning Brannon at the stake for what I presumed as disloyalty. One was no greater transgression than the other, why give my father a place in my life and not find a place for Brannon?

  Will he have mercy on me if I go to him, needing the truth? Or will the truth tear me apart? I’ve never believed in wishing on a star, but I sure as hell would try right now. One way or the other, it’s time I learn the truth.

  My phone vibrates with a text from Lea.

  Hey, wanna grab lunch with me and Thayer?

  Sounds great. Where? I push send.

  Little River Café. In thirty, she replies.

  “I’ll be there.” Anything has to be better than sitting here, alone with my thoughts.

  Thayer waves at me from the corner table, and Lea turns in her seat to smile. A blonde with hot pink highlights sits opposite of Thayer, I take the chair between her and Lea. “Hi, ladies. Thanks for inviting me.” Returning their smile.

  “I’m happy you could make it,” Thayer says.

  “Torrie, this is Maisyn. Maisyn, Torrie. Maisyn owns her own Tattoo Shop, she does all our art. She also may or may not be sleeping with Lachlan.” Lea cracks me up, she’s so blunt.

  “Lea, damn, put it out there. Good to meet you.” Maisyn extends her hand, covered in tattoos. She’s breathtakingly beautiful.

/>   “Who’s Lachlan?” I question as I scan the table for an explanation.

  Thayer answers, “Went to college with One, they’re good friends. He’s Scottish.” Wiggling her eyebrows as she talks about him.

  “Does he have a brother, I’m not fairing too well in the relationship area?” Giggling, we look over the menu.

  “Are you serious? I mean. I thought you and Brannon would work things out.” Lea cocks her brow with doubt.

  “No, I’m not serious. I’ve decided to hear him out.” I continue to read the menu, well, I try to, but I know they’re all staring. I glance up to mouths hanging open. “What? A girl has the right to change her mind?”

  “Even after Ava’s shit show? I’m just surprised,” Lea says.

  “Yeah, what in the hell is her issue?” I ask.

  “She’s always thought she had a claim on that boy, he’s an amazing man,” Maisyn adds. “Oh, I went to school with them.” She gives me a nod.

  “Well, I for one am thrilled. He loves you like One loves Lea,” Thayer throws in.

  “Or the way Hardy loves you or how Lachlan loves you, Maisyn.” Lea smiles with a wink. Maisyn chokes on her drink. “He does, you know it.”

  “Well, I’m about to find out. I need to know the truth, and he keeps saying there’s more to the story,” I admit before we place our orders.

  “He loves you. Brannon hasn’t been with anyone else. Everyone just assumed it had something to do with everything he has on his plate.” Thayer shrugs. “But one conversation is all it takes to know he loves you, it’s written all over him.” I picture him in front of me, it’s true. He looks at me the same as he always did.

  “Now, what?” Maisyn ponders to herself.

  “For you or me?” I question, we chuckle.

  “So, are you going to approach him?” Lea presses for answers.

  “I’ll wait on him.” Our food arrives and the conversation moves on to babies. We begin plans for showers for Lea and Thayer.

  Maisyn and I walk Main Street after lunch, just window shopping and girl talk. She’s a great a girl. I give thought to a tattoo. My father would fall over and threaten death if I did. So, I ask. “Do I need an appointment to see you? If I would want a tattoo, not saying I do.” I laugh nervously.