Changing Lanes (Highway 17 #1)

by Leaona Luxx

  “Daddy!” Andi yells as she runs to me. I pick her up mid-stride, hugging her to me. My eyes well with tears, I can’t hold back. I kiss her and press her tightly to my chest again.

  “Oh, thank God. I love you. Andi, Daddy loves you so much,” I keep repeating to her.

  “Did you miss me?” she asks with a smile. Her face is as dirty as her clothes.

  “I did. And Gamma missed you,” I tell her between kisses. Searching the room, I don’t see Ava. One jerks his thumb toward the door. “Where have you been, baby?”

  I sit down with Andi in my lap. “Ava said you told her to pick me up from Momma Torrie. Why are you crying, Dad?”

  “I didn’t tell Ava to take you from Torrie. We thought something bad happened to you, Ava shouldn’t have done that.” Andi hugs me again.

  “I’m sorry, Dad. Am I in trouble?” She nuzzles my neck.

  “No, Andi. But never go with Ava again. Not until you hear me say it’s okay. Do you understand?” I may kill Ava, damn it.

  “I do, Ava’s in trouble.” She nods her head.

  “She is. Now, I think Gamma’s going to help get you cleaned up and ready for bed. I’ll be up after I talk to Ava and thank the police for looking for you.” She smiles brightly.

  “I want Momma Torrie to do it, okay?” She jumps from my lap.

  I take her hand in mine. “Andi, Torrie was so upset over losing you, she went home for tonight.” She frowns.

  “I didn’t mean to hurt her, Dad. Can I call her?” she asks.

  “After your bath, I’ll let her know you’re home. Go bathe, dirty girl.” I tweak her nose, and Andi giggles and runs into my mom’s arms.

  “One, Lea, Thayer, and Hardy, what did I ever do to deserve such good friends. Thank you.” I hug each one, especially Lea. “And you, I’ll never be able to repay you.” I kiss her cheek.

  “What good is having money if you don’t help people with it? It was the right thing to do.” Lea pats my chest then takes One’s hand.

  “If there were more good people like y’all in this world, it would be a great world.” I follow them out the door. Ava sits in the back of a cop car. One helps Lea into their car, as Hardy shuts Thayer’s door. I know they’re waiting to see if I choke her. Good, I may need to be pulled off.

  Rick stands by the door, opening it when I approach the car. “I want to talk to her.”

  “Try to stay calm.” Rick gets her out, and she starts on me first thing.

  “Why in the fuck am I in handcuffs? Brannon, tell them to let me go, she’s my daughter. Did that bitch put you up to this?” Ava unleashes her mouth.

  “First,” I seethe, “don’t you dare blame any of this on Torrie. Do you hear me, goddamn it? Do you hear me, Ava?” Her mouth pops open, and I know she’s about to say something we’ll both regret. “Shut the fuck up, Torrie is off limits. Period. Second, Andi is off limits. Period. What you did today was not only evil but vicious. I’m done. I’ll see you in court.” I turn to walk away, knowing there is no way she’s going to let me off easy.

  “So, that’s it? You’re just walking away from us?” she yells.

  Glancing over my shoulder, I yell back to her. “Not us, you.”

  I rush up the steps so I’m not there when they take Ava away. She needs to learn, it’s a tough lesson but it’s time. Reaching for my phone, I call Torrie.

  “Brannon?” Torrie’s voice is scratchy.

  “She’s home,” I announce with a sigh.

  “Thank heavens. I feel so horrible, I’m sorry I messed up.” From the sound of her voice, she’s cried all evening.

  “Andi is fine. You’re not responsible for any of this.” I try to calm her down. “Mom has her in the tub, Ava’s on her way to booking. I have legal custody so she was arrested for parental kidnapping.”

  “You put Ava in jail?” She gasps.

  “Yes. Torrie, she put all of us through this shit. Why? Because she thinks she has a right to? That’s bullshit,” I rant.

  “It was needless, but putting her in jail is harsh. Andi’s her daughter, Brannon.” Is she taking up for her?

  “Wait. What are you saying? She doesn’t deserve it?” It’s been a long day, and I’m getting agitated.

  “I think there’s alternative ways,” she argues.

  “Like what? I’ve given her plenty of chances, it’s time she’s taught a lesson,” I yell.

  “And I’m telling you there are other ways to do it. Do you seriously want Andi’s mom in jail? For fuck’s sake,” she contends.

  “Why are you taking up for her? You hate her?” I have word vomit, please just shut my mouth.

  “I don’t hate her, I just don’t like her. She made a mistake, she loves you. I guess I’ve had time to see her differently, I’ve been where she’s at. Making poor choices for the man you love. Let’s not forget, this happened on my watch,” she counters.

  “None of this was your fault. You’re only feeling guilty because you don’t like her,” I bicker back at her.

  “It’s my fault, I was responsible for your daughter. And right now, I don’t like you too much.” The call ends. She fucking hung up on me. Son of a bitch. I slam my fist into the wall, fuck.

  Three in the morning, I’m still awake. The details from yesterday continue to run through my mind. Andi could have been abducted. My mistakes came so close to costing Brannon everything. I’m ill-equipped to be a mother, I’ve proven it twice now.

  No, I don’t blame Ava. Andi’s her daughter. Shouldn’t you be able to trust the person you leave them with to protect them? She had every right to take Andi, to prove I’m not fit. People look down their noses at Ava for how she was raised, who it’s made her become.

  She’s holding on to all she knows with everything she’s got. Is it her fault this was the only way she knew to do it? I don’t know. I think she should have the opportunity to be a good mother. The only way to see if she can do it is to give her the tools for the job.

  I mean, look at me. I hold two degrees, I’m COO of a Fortune 500 company, and I let a child left in my charge to be taken, right under my nose. If the opportunities I was afforded in life had been given to Ava, she may have thrived.

  I also know I can’t stay. Do I want Brannon? With every fiber of my being, but I’m not good for Andi. Looking at this from a business perspective, I’m not qualified. She should have the best there is, but I’m not prepared to be her mother. I also am not her mother.

  Making my mind up, I get to work. Firing up my laptop, I put my business degree to work. By ten in the morning, I’m at the courthouse. Dressed in my black pencil skirt and white button-up, I march into the building and bail Ava out.

  It cost me a pretty penny, but within an hour she comes out the side door. She looks around, spotting me leaning against my SUV. “Need a ride?” I ask.

  Walking up to me, she isn’t too pleased. “What in the hell are you up to?”

  “Get in, I’ll explain.” Jerking my head to the passenger side, she stares at me until I move to the driver’s door. “What do you have to lose?” I ask as I get in.

  She shakes her head then jumps in. “What? What is it you need to say to me?”

  “Let’s take a ride. I have a proposal for you.” I put my car into reverse.

  “Just say what you came to say.” She leans against the window, looking dejected.

  Driving through town, I turn into an apartment complex. Coming to a stop in front of a townhouse, I reach for the manila envelope and get out. I wait for her to follow my lead, but she glares at me until I wave her out.

  “What do you want?” She gets out, attitude and all. Why am I even trying with her? Andi.

  Throwing the package on the hood of my SUV, I point to it. “This is your chance. This envelope contains keys to the apartment behind us, it’s yours for two years. I paid your tuition at Brunswick Community College for courses in Practical Nursing, a two-year degree. It’s tough, but I believe you can do it. Your car should be here around noon.
It’s nothing special, but it’s safer than what you were driving. So here it is, Ava, your opportunity to get your shit together.”

  Her eyes switch between me and the package. “I don’t want your charity,” she spits at me.

  “That’s your decision, but I’m only trying to do what’s right here.” I grab the envelope and start walking to my door.

  “Wait. Why? So you can have Brannon if I have my own life?” she accuses.

  “No. It’s for you.” I shake my head. “And Andi. She deserves the best, you need to be that.” I shrug.

  Her eyes grow wide. “Why? After what I’ve done, why would you help me?”

  “Andi is the most important thing here, Ava. Yesterday proved I’ll not make a good mother.” Shrugging, my eyes fill with tears. “I couldn’t keep mine alive long enough to learn how to be one. I have no right trying to be one to your daughter.”

  “I was being a bitch, Torrie. That’s all I know how to be,” she snarls.

  “Cut the shit, I’m not in the mood. If you don’t want to give yourself a break, give it to Andi. After all, she’s all that matters.” Tossing her the envelope, I get in my car and turn toward the office.

  As I park, I scan the lot for Brannon’s truck, but he’s not here. He’s called a hundred times this morning, texted two hundred. I hurry in to talk to One. I need to get the hell out of here. “One? Hardy?” I call out until I see or hear someone.

  “Torrie? I’m in the conference room,” One yells.

  Walking around the corner, I see he’s working on a project. “You expecting someone?”

  “Not you, in an hour. How can I help you?” he asks.

  “The hotel is on track. It looks as though we’ll have a ribbon cutting in three weeks or so. Correct?” I know I’m right, I’m procrastinating.

  He sits down, folding his hands. “Yes, it looks it.” He cocks his brow.

  “My father will be here for it, so just keep me updated. Here’s the main line at my office, if anything comes up, call me directly please.” I push the card across the table. He doesn’t take his eyes off me as he reaches for it.

  “What’s going on, Torrie?” One picks the card up, shoving it in his shirt pocket.

  Dropping my head, I do my best not to cry. Damn it. “I’m going home. Please tell Lea and Thayer I’ll be calling to check on them. I appreciate all you have done for me while I’ve been a guest here, but it’s time to go.”

  “You’ll have to excuse me, but that’s bullshit. What in the hell is going on?” He stands, crossing the room.

  Running my hand over the tears falling down my face, I look away from him. “I can’t. I love Brannon, Andi means the world to me, but yesterday proved we’re ill-fated. I need to leave before we get any deeper or someone gets hurt.”

  “Ava created the havoc yesterday, not you,” he counters.

  “The tip of the iceberg.” He shakes his head. “One, what if Lea’s children were nine when you met her and you lost one, how would you feel?”

  He shoves his hands in his pockets, nodding. “I see. Brannon is gonna be crushed.”

  “He’s not the only one,” I huff. “Thank you.” I offer my hand to him, he looks at it, dragging his hands from his pockets.

  “Naw, girl. You’re family now. We love you, Torrie.” He pulls me into a hug, helping to unleash my tears. He holds me while I cry, just like a brother I never had.

  Pulling myself together, I step away. “Another thing, will you make sure he gives this to Andi?” Handing him the small box, he takes it. “Okay, thank you. Goodbye, One.”

  My feet feel heavy as I walk out the building, memories of the last few months flood my mind. I rush to my SUV, knowing I need to get out of here before Brannon shows up. My phone hasn’t stopped, he’ll come looking for me. I drive toward the airport with Snow Patrol blasting my anthem. Poetic justice, I suppose.

  My feet hit the tarmac as I trod to the plane, my family name on the side. Tightening the belt down, I look out the window one last time at the home I’m leaving. Brannon is going to hate me, but this for the best. If it hurts this bad, it must be the right thing to do.

  Landing in New York by one in the afternoon, I decide to go home instead of going to my office. Walking through the front door, I drop my bags, the rest will be here tomorrow. I look around, the space I once loved feels empty now. Lonely even.

  Kicking my heels off, I grab a glass of wine and change my clothes. Crashing onto my bed, I wrap myself in the comforter. From under the covers, I press play on my phone messages. Brannon’s voice ranges from raspy with morning sleep to concerned to frightened and finally, anger and hurt.

  Mornin’ baby. Call me when you wake up.

  Babe, let’s have breakfast.

  Torrie, call me.

  Hey, I’m worried.

  I’m at the gate, let me in.

  Are you fucking kidding me? You fucking left? No, let’s talk. I love you. Nothing. What the fuck, goddamn it?

  Torrie, baby. Please. This was nothing. Call me.

  Answer your fucking phone. You bailed Ava out? You had no right. Pick your fucking phone up.

  Torrie, please. I can’t lose you again.

  I love you.

  Ten years. It still proves to be impossible. My father was right, Brannon and I were never meant to be. I know more than ever now I wasn’t meant to be in this world. My father said he couldn’t be in ours. Goddamn it, someone should’ve told my fucking heart. He has a child, and she will always come first. I don’t begrudge it, Andi should come first. I wish my parents’ would have put me first just once. Brannon’s hurt now, but he’ll eventually understand. If Ava works hard, maybe she’ll get everything she’s ever wanted— love.

  My phone vibrates, and I can see it’s Brannon. I bite the bullet. “Hey.”

  “Where are you?” Brannon demands, getting straight to the point.

  “I’m home in New York. Brannon, don’t hate me. I just can’t. I’m not a mother, I proved that nine years ago.” I sob into the phone.

  “Listen at you, do you really think this is for the best? You're breaking my fucking heart, Torrie,” he beseeches me.

  “I do think it’s for the best. What if the next time it’s her life? What then?” I argue.

  “That’s a bullshit answer. Parents make mistakes, I make mistakes,” he asserts.

  “I’m too much like my father, it’s not in me to be a parent. My own body knew it,” I state the evidence.

  “Torrie, don’t do this. I love you.”

  I break, holding the phone away from my mouth as I cry. Taking a deep breath, I hurry through as best as I can. “I love you. My time with you all made profound changes in me. I’ll hold it close to my broken heart, forever.” I end the call, switching my phone off.

  Eventually, I cry myself to sleep. Two in the morning, I wake, startled from a dream. It was incredibly real. I hold my chest as I sob. I begin to frantically search for my phone. I need to see, I need to know. Powering it up, I see new messages from Brannon. I check the text messages first. Last one was thirty minutes ago.

  I love you.

  He’s okay. Surely, he’s home and he’s safe. I’ll call Lea tomorrow or Thayer, to check in or something.

  As I set my phone on my nightstand, it dawns on me the other number on my phone. My mother. I can’t deal with her right now, I’ll tackle it tomorrow. Maybe the next day. This week, I’ll get to her later this week. I set the alarm for six and roll over.

  After crying for the last three hours, I give up, getting out of bed and getting in the shower. I can’t shake my dream, it felt so real. Brannon called me to tell me Andi had been in an accident and needed me. But I couldn’t get to her, try as I might.

  I leave early for the office. I have a short detour to make before I go in. I grab some flowers from a street vendor for my trip. Circling the big drive, I park by the curb, grabbing the flowers. I wander over, trembling the closer I get.

  Bending, I place the blue and whi
te flowers in the vase. Dusting the stone as I do, I run my fingers over his name. His beautiful, fragile face never far from sight. “Hey, baby boy. I needed to see you today. I wanted to tell you, your daddy knows about you now. I’m sorry it took me so long; must’ve been why I didn’t get to keep you. Like your sister, I couldn’t handle it. I needed to tell you, I love you. I’m sorry I let you down, Adan.”

  Two week’s post-Torrie and I’m not doing any better. I text her every day, well, three times a day. She reads them immediately but never answers. I’m surprised she hasn’t blocked me or changed her number. Andi cries every night at bedtime. I hold her, explaining to her it isn’t her fault Torrie left.

  Ava’s doing better, though, I still won’t let her see Andi. She needs a little more time to think about what she’s done, not just to us but Torrie. The minute you think you have life figured out, it throws you a curve ball. Why I haven’t learned how to hit the damn thing, I have no clue.

  I’m busy at work when One knocks on my door. “You got a minute?”

  “Sure, what’s up?” I give him my attention.

  “Harrington’s ready. I’m going to let Torrie know, they’ll be having a grand opening,” he explains.

  “Is she coming back?” I ask.

  “I don’t know, I just wanted you prepared. She may call or it may be her father. In case you answer, I didn’t want any surprises,” he says.

  “Oh, okay. Thanks for the heads up.” I grind my teeth, trying to keep my cool.

  “Say it, it’s written all over you,” One prompts.

  “I’m telling you now, I’m gonna knock his fuckin’ head off. And if she shows her face, I may take her over my knee. Bullshit way to leave, fucking driving me crazy.” I slam books and drawers, anything I can get my hands on.

  “I need you to not hit her father, and it’s completely up to you about putting her over your knee,” he chides as he holds his hands in the air.

  “Fuck you. Although knocking him out would feel great, I wouldn’t do it. I’ll just lay low,” huffing, I drop my head on my desk.